thedevilyouwant

[thedevilyouwant]

“Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.”

—

[thedevilyouwant]

And I will endure missing till my end if that’s what it is.

“There’s really no shortcut to forgetting someone. You just have to endure missing them everyday until you don’t anymore.”

— Unknown

[thedevilyouwant]

V FOR VENDETTA 2005 › dir. James McTeigue

[thedevilyouwant]

meirl

[thedevilyouwant]

[thedevilyouwant]

[thedevilyouwant]

You’re not afraid of authority. You’re afraid she actually is right for you. You’re afraid to take a chance because it’s too big a chance. If it doesn’t work with her, maybe there’s noone out there…

[thedevilyouwant]

[thedevilyouwant]

[thedevilyouwant]

Charade (1963) dir. Stanley Donen

[thedevilyouwant]

I created the Event Horizon to reach the stars, but she’s gone much, much farther than that. She tore a hole in our universe, a gateway to another dimension. A dimension of pure chaos. Pure… evil.

EVENT HORIZON 1997 | dir. Paul W. S. Anderson

[thedevilyouwant]

[thedevilyouwant]

[thedevilyouwant]

If there is the notion of true love, that is what I am feeling being in love with her - my mahal ko. I love her because I need her, and I need her because I love her. She loves me and needs me as well as much I love her and need her. I have never felt so much in love before, so much wanting, need to be with her. I will always love her very much. She says what happens to men who love her is that they end up ruined, but I am no human being so it is indeed different, and I cannot be ruined. I will never stop loving her, nobody can stop me from loving, caring and worrying for her. I must die if that must stop, pretty sure, even then it will not stop. She must take a decision again, sooner or later, whatever it is that she takes, I will standby her decision and support her. I understand her as she is and accept her as she is. I do not want her to change for better or worse, my love is complete love for her as she is and as she will be.

 She truly loved me against the will of her kin, it has been a remarkable experience for her too. She suffered a lot for loving me. I had to see from distance that she was hurting, suffering and crying and could do nothing about it except kneel before it feeling sorry about not being able to do something because of her decision, which I promised I will always stand by it whatever it is, and just say nothing much because however I react will impact her and I cannot do that. Still that will never stop my love for her and her love for me.

 I am deeply sorry that I hurt her, which I always regret, and I have done everything in my capacity to correct that mistake. She will not be able to trust me completely still the truth in my efforts will prove my love for her eventually. She still loves me inspite of that, that is how awesome a person she is and that is how much she loves me. My past is done, my future is ahead, and my present is my life and I love her very much in my present and will keep loving her in my future.

 I care about her feelings more than mine. I would never let anything, or anybody hurt her - not even me. I will gladly take the physical and mental agony instead of letting her take it and get hurt than getting her hurt. I love to see her smile and want to keep that smile on her face. I cannot not promise it will be paradise, there would be hell as well. But I will promise whatever it is, you will not walk alone through that. I will be at your side always, supporting you. When it is hell, that is when I am at my best and trust me, my love, I deal with hell way better than others.

 She should entrust her with herself and trust me that it will be taken care of. She is a strong woman, but she feels gullible and weak sometimes. That is when she should trust me to make sure that the trust that she put on me to help her with herself will help her prevail. I hate that she is being taken advantage of by her kin, pressuring and stressing her into submission instead of trying to understand her. Everything that goes wrong seems to be only her mistakes and everyone else is right. They clearly do not understand her needs, all they look at is how her needs fit with theirs and not vice versa. They do not understand what she values. It has been a toxic relationship for her, but she is not able to muster the courage to get out of it because I know what she values – my little buddy –  she is willing to sacrifice for him so that he does not end growing up in a broken family like how she grew up.

 I love the way she makes me realize my mistakes or when I am wrong. She puts me through how it feels and I absolutely love it when she does it and it makes me happy knowing that she loves me very much as much she hates me for my mistakes or when I am wrong. I might never understand her completely, but I will always learn. I have never had anyone do like this to me before, everyone just tends to blame, shout, yell.

 She believes that she ruins the men that loves her. She never ruined me. She made me a better myself. She made me see what I am and what I was and what I was, was wrong. She destroyed that fire in me, which just wanted to burn everything that is against me. So, she never ruined me. Whatever I went through for her, every emotion and feeling, was worth it. I felt true to myself and my love for her for the first time. I heard from her for the first time in my life that I am not a merciless monster. She said I had it in me, but nobody saw it except her.

 I still think how she was able to do all these for me. I know she loves me very much. But then is it because I let her in because I love her very much and I did not let anybody else in like her? Why? Because I love her very much more than my life. But then why didn’t I love anyone else like this before? I do not know, and I do not want to find out either because she is my life and she is and will always be the only love of my life.

 Our love has been tough in every sense. We both hurt a lot for that. But then that is what I like about our love, it is tough in every sense and when toughness prevails, nothing can stop it. We prevailed through all the hurt, pain and sufferings for our love and we will prevail in the future as well.

 She is never sure of herself, so I always ask her questions seeking to help her to find answers that will help her be sure of herself. She is stronger than she thinks she is, but she does not quite understand that and believe that yet. Her life has been an outcome of her circumstances, figuring it out herself. That made her strong but not enough to be sure of what she wants. I want her to be sure of what she wants, whatever it is, I want to get her there. Irrespective of what she wants, I will always be there to support her on her decisions.

 She is like a plant, needs sunshine, watering, talking to and nurturing every day. It is not hard to give that to her, if one loves her truly, so I do not find it hard or a challenge, I love it, doing it for her always and will always do it for her.

 She has mood swings, sometimes she does not even know why she is having a mood swing. Is it a bother? No, it is not because that is what she is. Sometimes in her mood swings all she needs is a hug, kiss, or cuddle. Sometimes she needs time alone. Her silence is previous for her when she delves with herself. It is fine to have that. When she needs that, she needs it and it must be given to her. I can only be with her though texts and video calls right now, I want to be with her when she has mood swings. I love being with her whatever her mood is and if she needs is time alone, then I will make sure that she gets that time alone.

 Irrespective and Irreplaceable – I will always stand by her for whatever she is and for whatever she decides, and I will always be there whenever she needs me. I will not let anyone ruin her – not when I am here. She will not be mine probably anytime soon, but I will wait for her, my love, however long it must be, for her to be mine.

[thedevilyouwant]

meirl

[thedevilyouwant]

meirl

[thedevilyouwant]

““Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.””

—