thedrunkphilosopher

[thedrunkphilosopher]

men take shrooms one time and think they are philosophers. meanwhile, little girls are burdened with prophetic dreams from the moment they are conscious, and we know we are nothing special.

[thedrunkphilosopher]

alexa? how do you make the screaming stop?

[thedrunkphilosopher]

ssmashed my thumb in the back door and broke it the second i woke up today.

[thedrunkphilosopher]

all i do every day is wait for it to be over, and the next day to come.

[thedrunkphilosopher]

i wanna be someone great but ill never put in the work to actually do it.

so here i sit. doomed to be someones mother and wife. nothing more.

i never went to collage or did well in school. I'm so mentally ill that I've never had a real job.

i have nothing...

[thedrunkphilosopher]

woke up at 10:30pm, broke my thumb and got drunk.

i hate this

[thedrunkphilosopher]

something something the horrors of existence something something

[thedrunkphilosopher]

made a piss joke on main and my followers are too big of cowards to reblog it :(

[thedrunkphilosopher]

i forgot to make sure i was reblogging my shit to the right account :(

killing myself now

[thedrunkphilosopher]

how do you know if you are having a unique thought? like you have no clue if someone hundreds of years ago already had that same thought, but maybe they just could articulate it or record it in any way that lasted through the years. so now its gone. and you are plagiarizing the thoughts of ancient people.

like, i feel there is no way that i am special in any significant way. so what are the chances that i come up with an original idea? probably very slim right? like in the grand scheme of the universe?

obviously, so in todays essay im going to explain...

[thedrunkphilosopher]

being drunk alone at 7am from not having slept yet is an essential part of being 'just a girl'

i dont make the rules

(im getting worried that someone from my fandom blog will find this account and know its me from the way i type lmao oh well)

[thedrunkphilosopher]

i wonder if people would think my fandom meme posts were funnier if they knew i have a west virginian accent?

like i dont have a super stong accent (i don't think) but i still say a lot of shit differently (yall and yins) and i use the punctual 'whenever' which is apparently an appalachian thing.

also creek is pronounced 'crick' fight me lol and don't get me started on how to pronounce 'tin foil' lmao

[thedrunkphilosopher]

do yall ever think about the fact we are alive a little too hard?

like we are all actually existing right now. and because of that, we are also going to have to die? no. ew. stop that. i hate it so much.

why did my sprem win the race? why exist to dread existing? why did i try so hard to live before i was born, when i now don't try at all?

[thedrunkphilosopher]

listening to mitski drunk should be mandatory for all 20 something year old fems and gays of all flavors. its a right of passage, maybe? idk its spiritual, that i know for sure. o

[thedrunkphilosopher]

im thinking too hard about lunch meat/deli meat.

like the more i think about it the less certain i am of what it is. like i know its cured meat..but how..how is it 'cured'? cured of what exactly?

idk lots of questions..

[thedrunkphilosopher]

i run a different blog and wanna drunk ramble somewhere and not clog yalls feed so i made this blog lol

im going to post my inebriated thoughts here. enjoy.