The dumbest blog you will ever read. We like to chug and talk about literally nothing at all. Welcome.
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STFU
It's 11:57pm. I am reporting live from my bedroom. I just finished watching a super shitty movie on Netflix. It was so shitty that I even had to google it afterwards to find out what it was about. Like seriously, what the fuck did I just watch? Couldn't tell you. It's called Cake. Watch it. Jk don't. I don't get it. WHATEVER.
I'm writing because my neighbor is currently getting fucked. I was about to get some shut eye after finishing that awful film until I hear, "uhh... ughh.. mmm, yes..., ugh" It's like a symphony of constant deep, heavy sighs followed by higher-pitched whimpering. Sometimes, in unison. SHUT THE FUCK UP. No one makes that much noise when having sex. Like, one of you is faking for sure and the other one is making just as much noise to make you feel less weird. I feel like I need some bed creaking or something to complete the mood. Instead, I just get weird breathing and moaning and am left to fill in the gaps myself.
Wait. It's over. I don't even know if either of them... ya know. There was no climax of noise. Now they're just talking. Probably saying things like: Man: That was great Woman: Yeah. Man: Did you finish? Woman: Yeah (Lying) Man: Good. Good work. Woman: ZzzZZzzZZ Man: *Makes frozen pizza Woman: Pfft
Goodnight.
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I’m Dumb. You’re Dumb. We’re All Dumb.
Kellen and I are coworkers and probably the dumbest friends you'll ever come across. We don't work in the same office. We don't even work in the same state. So we're left to communicate via Slack. If you don't know what slack is, you probably don't have a job. And that's why you're reading this. Because you're living in your mother's basement chugging away while eating subs. Love it. Nailed it. You're winning. Anyway, slack is basically the work version of AIM. You remember AIM. Unless you're a 12 year old. In that case, GTFO. Jk lolzo. Welcome. Whatever. Anyway, what? Oh. We talk on Slack basically all day and have the dumbest conversations about literally everything and nothing at all. So we decided to take these dumb convos somewhere we can document them and they will live on FOREVER because INTERNET.
We hope you enjoy and get a laugh out of this nothingness. Btw my name is Rachel. Bai.
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