thefriendlyneighborhoodqueer

[thefriendlyneighborhoodqueer]

Duke and Jason keep track of the batfamily's fuck ups and tally points according to the fuck up. Not for any significant reason, mind you, but because its funny and Duke LOVES rubbing it in their face.

It is VERY early in the batfams patrol. Duke is the only one at the mansion at the moment and is very much in bed. Jason calls

Duke: Jesus, you just left. What happened?

Jason: Give Tim six points!

Duke; Are these "because he's Tim" points? Because we agreed we would not do that anymore so we don't clog the chart.

Jason: He broke Damiens arm.

Duke, fully awake now: ...You're joking

Jason: In two places!

Duke is fully out of bed, and writing "Broke robins arm. Six points" under Tims name on a chart full of the batfams fuck up: Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Duke walking into the batcave with a nasty scowl on his face: Dick gets three points.

Jason: Did he punch you in the face or something?

Duke: I remembered he was a cop on the way down here

Jason audibly gags that echos in the cave: He's getting four.

Duke: Four sounds good, yeah.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jason, reading over the chart: Hey, how come cass isn't on here?

Duke: I actually enjoy cass's company. i also can't catch her doing anything wrong, but mostly because I enjoy her company.

Jason: Alright, then why's Alfred on here with 20 points?

Duke getting literal, actual, war flashbacks from his time in the we are robin movement and all the bullshit he and his friend were made to do under Alfreds careful "Watch": Alfred's staying on the chart.

[thefriendlyneighborhoodqueer]

when you're down bad for a guy but the only thing he's down bad for is france:

[thefriendlyneighborhoodqueer]

[thefriendlyneighborhoodqueer]

crt nostalgia is really funny to me because it makes total sense why everyone switched to lcd flat panel screens as soon as the tech came along

[thefriendlyneighborhoodqueer]

The tribes of Tumblr appeared to worship Apollo as their primary patron deity, most often under the epithet Apollo Spairahemon ("Apollo the Ball-Thrower") as a god of prophecy and sport. His name was typically invoked to celebrate a user blessed with uncommon prescience. Moments of prophecy were considered highly sacred and were often recorded, and such texts are sometimes accompanied by an artistic depiction of the god — either his traditional masculine image or, unusually, in the form of a young woman, which appears to have been an earlier style before a conservative shift toward more conventional iconography — preparing to cast a round rubber ball that our scholars believe was used in the sport known as "dodge ball". Much as other cults regarded his arrows as bringers of disease and health, this community believed that being struck by this ball would bestow prophetic visions.

Some icons are reproduced below:

An earlier depiction (c. 2020) of Apollo as a girl clad in a simple tunic and playing with other children. Figures are smiling and the image is brightly colored, indicating a celebratory outlook toward knowledge of the future.

A later piece (c. 2022) that resembles the traditional appearance of Apollo. References to childhood and play are omitted, and the god carries a more frightening aspect; perhaps this icon represented grim omens rather than good tidings.

[thefriendlyneighborhoodqueer]

Definitely been said before, but Andrew didn't just stop because Neil was having a 'nervous breakdown'. He stopped because when he kisses someone he expects to be used, hurt, wanted in a needy way that curbs all respect; even with Roland this was partially the case (COUGH he ended up using handcuffs with the guy). A delicate hand on his sleeve, refusing to even graze his skin, was absolutely not what Andrew was anticipating and that's what really freaked him out.

Neil was the first person to treat Andrew in a way that implied feeling, not just lust or greed or abuse. Andrew couldn't get self-destructively lost in that; it pulled him out. It reinforced the pipe dream and made it real simultaneously.

[thefriendlyneighborhoodqueer]

can’t believe it’s 2020 and percy’s panda pillow pet still has not received justice 

[thefriendlyneighborhoodqueer]

thinking about andrew being really pent up because he hasn’t gotten a good opportunity to be alone with neil for a while and andrew refuses to use his words. so their next exy match he locks the fuck in, shuts out the goal, and plays with genuine skill. he knows that even if getting alone with neil doesn’t happen organically, after that match neil will now Make It Happen. and then they fuck nasty the end

[thefriendlyneighborhoodqueer]

i love every time cas dies and dean is like unfuckingconsolable on his knees screaming at god and sam is just. there

[thefriendlyneighborhoodqueer]

Does everyone have something you'd be kind of curious to try out for a little bit, just to see what it's like, but that you 100% never will because you rationally know that it's actually legit dangerous and that you cannot just "try it a little bit" just to see what it's like?

I've always been kind of curious about what it would be like to join a cult. Like I know that it's like those underwater whorls that pull you down in a blink and you're never going to fight your way back to the surface again, so I'm absolutely not going to fuck with that shit, but I'm pretty sure I'd be really good at being in a cult.

[thefriendlyneighborhoodqueer]

Thurston's Orange Peel Theory

[thefriendlyneighborhoodqueer]

Batkids early adoption au except it all happens in the same night (also Bruce Wayne is an idiot)

Picture this:

Bruce goes to the circus. A tragedy occurs. He starts walking back to his car with a freshly orphaned Dick Grayson clinging to his neck. He gets there only to find...

The tires are gone. All but one, which is in the process of being removed by a scrawny street kid named Jason Todd. The boy runs.

Bruce panics. He obviously can't let this poor, obviously homeless kid run off to get crimed in Crime Alley. Bruce does the only thing he can think of: he throws Dick like a pokeball. It works, sort of. Dick catches the kid, the kid catches a concussion.

Bruce panics harder.

He bundles the kids into the back of his car and hops in the drivers seat. "Hospital," he says to himself, "I can do this. I'm Batman."

"What?" Dick says.

"What?" Jason says.

"What?" Bruce says.

THUMP. They're interrupted by the sound of someone landing bodily on the roof.

Bruce stumbles out of the car to find Tim Drake doing the family guy death pose on top of his $400,000 Mercedes. Above them, a broken fire escape squeaks a threat of more violence. Bruce is distracted by it for only a second, but when he looks back down, Tim is already upright and setting off a camera in his face.

"Hi, Batman!" Tim grins. "I knew it was you."

Bruce blinks away the stars with a sigh and opens the back door again. Tim scrambles off the roof and wanders in.

Bruce now has three childr- wait when did that one get here? Cassandra Cain is wedged into the middle seat between Dick and Jason. She smiles at him sweetly.

"Who-" Bruce begins.

Someone wings a brick at them out of nowhere. Tim narrowly avoids further head trauma only because Bruce's dad reflexes activate in time to bat (ha!) it away. Bruce turns to see a little blonde girl sprinting off. He moves to catch her, but steps on Jason's discarded tire iron; it flips up and nails him in the balls. Stephanie Brown gets away.

Bruce realises, while he's writhing pitifully on the ground, that the car still has no tires.

He calls Alfred for help.

---

Four hours, a hospital visit, a whole lot of paperwork and one long phone call to CPS later, Bruce arrives home with four emergency foster kids in tow.

Talia Al Ghul is sitting in his living room with a baby carrier.

[thefriendlyneighborhoodqueer]

Alright, I think I like tumblr now.

A pun post crossed my dash, and I reblogged it with an equally bad pun in return. A couple of my followers find it funny, it's a good day for everyone.

That was on July 7th.

Virality on Reddit was entirely algorithmic. You could garner a couple crossposts, but the success of a post was entirely dependent on whether or not it hit r/all--the main page of Reddit. If your post does that, it's immediately exposed to 10x the number of people and immediately gets upvoted.

On my pun post, I get a couple reblogs. And those reblogs get a couple reblogs--nobody really adds any content to the post, it just gets a couple reblogs here and there.

There's a specific chain of reblogs that I'd like to focus on. The most popular post on this chain has about 25 reblogs on it. Half the posts have three reblogs or fewer. Five posts in this chain have just one reblog total.

But the reblog chain keeps going. And going. It breaches containment many times over. And finally, after a chain THIRTY SIX posts long, at 9:30 AM, July 22nd this morning, it hits a popular account.

99% percent of the people who have seen the post--virtually unchanged from how it left my dash--have seen it because it was curated by 36 different people. That's insane to me.

None of those 36 people know that they're part of this chain. They saw a post, reblogged it, and moved on. If any one of these people had not reblogged, the post would have a fraction of the impact it has.

And yet, after two weeks, the post has effectively hit the main page of tumblr. It was picked up, only because people liked it enough to show it to their followers. There were no algorithms necessary.

You really, truly, cannot get this on any other website.

[thefriendlyneighborhoodqueer]

i know allison ends up with seth’s ashes but do you think wymack hesitated. couldn’t let him go but couldn’t bear to be reminded. kept him on his desk for twenty minutes but started breathing so hard his chest got right because it’s not the same this is not how it’s supposed to be you’re not a fucking ornament you’re a kid i said i would help and you’re a kid i think could have survived you were supposed to live. and you’re on my fucking desk in an urn. allison loved him too so it would be easy enough to leave him with her. it’s what he’d have wanted probably. this is in everyone else’s interest. nothing to do with the part of your heart that fell out when you got that call and has been rotting ever since. thank god kayleigh told you the baby wasn’t yours given this was how well you took care of the kids you told you would help

[thefriendlyneighborhoodqueer]

you forget how much of trc really is gansey finding an interesting rock pattern and asking something like “what say you my esteemed compatriot?” and then looking over and adam’s eyes are rolled back in his head but other than that he just looks kinda bored. and also he thinks the rock is “just limestone gansey.”

[thefriendlyneighborhoodqueer]

A lot of people hate to hear this, but they in particular really need to understand it.

If you were raised in the US, and you weren't specifically raised as a specific religion other than Christianity, then you are culturally Christian. Yes, even if you were raised atheist. Yes, I know you hate that idea. People who were raised in specific other religions in the US are usually still influenced by it, just not as thoroughly.

But specific Protestant values and attitudes have worked their way so far into US culture that we do not ever think about. (They've gotten into US Catholicism, too, Catholics elsewhere are frequently WTF at US Catholics, or so I'm told.) The "Protestant work ethic" is one of them, that "manager in your head" you should kill. Purity as a principle. The nobility of suffering (very Calvinist specifically). The prosperity culture (again, very Calvinist). A whole list. I'm honestly not good enough at Christian history to list it all. After all, I wasn't raised Christian myself. But I can see and acknowledge that I was raised in a culture with a Christian hegemony. If I pay attention, I can see where it's affected how I think. And when I do pay attention and look at it, I can change it. I can root out those patterns in my head. It's a lot of work, but it's well worth doing.

Denying that you are culturally Christian on the basis of your absence of Christian upbringing, or absence of Christianity now, just shows that you don't understand what cultural Christianity is. It is the culture that you have marinated in all your life, if you grew up in the US. The same way you've marinated in racism, classism, sexism, right on down the line (and generally they are all one thing). All of that affects you, and the only way to fix it is to acknowledge it and work on it.

This isn't a "hot take". It's just a fucking fact.

I'm posting at 10:30pm US Pacific time on a Sunday night, and fucking nobody is going to see this. Or reblog it. But I feel better having said it.

[thefriendlyneighborhoodqueer]

i don’t have a brother ma’am adam replied 😭😭😭😭😭 but 😭 blue 😭 saw 😭 his 😭 eyes 😭 dart 😭 to 😭 gansey 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭