thehitmandeluxe-blog - Tumblr blog

[thehitmandeluxe-blog]

stupidinboxstuff:

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Send me ‘Sorry’ and my muse will fill out a formal apology form for yours

[thehitmandeluxe-blog]

Valkyrie Cain is my enemy. But it turns out that Valkyrie is also her own worst enemy. And the enemy of my enemy is my friend. So Valkyrie, is actually my friend. But, because she is her own worst enemy, the enemy of my friend is my enemy so actually Valkyrie is my enemy. But-

Billy-Ray Sanguine, after one too many drinks, probably. (via goldenxeyed)

[thehitmandeluxe-blog]

servantxofxdeath:

“I’ll fix it.” Daman deadpanned as he watched the male closely. “You’re running from Skulduggery aren’t you?” He asked, sighing because he disliked the skeleton. He just had a feeling he wasn’t right so he tended to stay away from him as much as possible. “What you do to piss him off now?”

“You know how many cracks my disappearin’ act causes? Hundreds. All very small.” The grin never wavered even though Daman was studying him. He wasn’t concerned about standing in the necromancer’s house. He’d read up on the other sorcerer. He didn’t like using his powers. This was beyond perfect. “Running is a little much. It’s more like, strolling away from.” Which was a lie. Running is exactly what he’d been doing. Going after the skeleton’s sidekick always seemed to piss him off enough to try and shoot him. “The less you know the more likely it is that you’ll let me stay, so I ain’t tellin’.”

[thehitmandeluxe-blog]

servantxofxdeath:

Daman stared at Billy-Ray for a moment then looked back outside then looked back at the hitman. “Can’t you just tunnel out of my house?” He asked because he really didn’t want the male in his home and didn’t want to fight at the moment. The thunder reminded him of the war and it just wasn’t a good night for him.

A grin tugged at Sanguine's lips. He could do exactly that, could tunnel right out of Daman's house and back to his own place. "And leave a crack in such a nice floor? I'll stay if you don't mind." Billy-Ray knew how much Skulduggery hated necromancers, and he also knew how much Daman hated Skulduggery. So this was the perfect place to stay while the Skeleton Detective searched for him.

[thehitmandeluxe-blog]

servantxofxdeath:

Daman didn’t even flinch as Billy-Ray popped out of his floor like an idiot as he was taking a shower. He pulled the certain back a bit and raised an eyebrow at him. “Oh it’s just you.” He said boredly before pulling the certain back so it was covering him and started washing the soap off his body and from his hair. “What do I own the pleasure of you being here?”

Thank god for shower curtains, Sanguine thought as he leaned against the sink. Maybe going straight into the bathroom when could hear the water running wasn't the brightest of ideas, but he liked getting down to business. Still... the lack of concern from Daman was a little irritating. "Yeah, it's me," Sanguine agreed. "You know, the hitman deluxe." The Texan made no move to reach for the straight razor in his pocket. He wasn't being paid to kill Daman, even if his employers wanted it done. There was no sense in killing him without pay. "Thought it'd be nice to drop by an' see how you're doin'."

[thehitmandeluxe-blog]

goldenxeyed:

“It would be like killing two birds with one stone,” Ravel mused, absently. “The job would be done, you’d be dead. Remind me the next time not to answer your distress calls, will you?”

A half-joke was a joke nonetheless. They needed Sanguine’s capabilities, especially with the mounting tension and the daily fighting. Losing him would have been a bittersweet victory.

“But did you get it?”

A frown tugged at his lips as he thought about whether or not the other man was joking. ".... I really hate y'all," Sanguine decided.

Honestly if it weren't for the fact that Tanith wanted to help the Irish, he would have gone back home to Texas already. He was tired of the weather, of the people, of the problems that were present. And if he got killed in because of the Irish... Sanguine was gonna be pissed.

"You mean did I stop your friend's hotel from movin'? Yeah, it's not going anywhere any time soon."

[thehitmandeluxe-blog]

REBLOG IF YOU WANT CURIOUS ANONS

[thehitmandeluxe-blog]

Just gonna say this really quick, okay? If I’m ever bothering you too much by sending too many memes, or turning to many memes into threads, tell me. I literally sit at my computer in a nervous wreck every time I send more than one ask to someone because I feel as if I’m annoying or bothering them. So please tell me if that’s the case, and I will totally limit the amount of things I send to you or turn into threads if you’ve already answered.

[thehitmandeluxe-blog]

general-envy:

She turned around and looked at him. Did she hear that correctly? This was the Midnight Hotel for gods sake. She was pretty sure that Shudder would have made security extra tight; Sanguine proof. “It’s that bloody loud, I wouldn’t put anything past it. Although, if you have a death wish, feel free to try and burrow in.” She wouldn’t let him of course. If he got caught then they would now that there was other people out there; Carribia didn’t think he’d be a very good prisoner. “Look, I don’t particularly want to be here with you, I assume the feelings mutual, but we have a job to do and we’re going to do it right. If you have any other ideas, that won’t end in death, now is the time to tell.”

Sanguine arched an eyebrow when she turned to face him. He'd seen the Skeleton Detective when he was pissed, had seen a lot scarier people when they were pissed, like Tanith, so Envy didn't intimidate him in the slightest. "Sure, whatever you say, darlin'. It ain't that loud, but sure. As for a death wish... don't you think that's a little much?" He had half a mind to just sink into the ground and start taking out the guards on the outside and get a closer look at the hotel. Unless there were specific sigils carved into the foundation, there shouldn't be any alarms if he burrowed in. "Oh believe me, the feeling is mututal," Sanguine agreed, "You mean, you have a job to do. Whether or not I help is my decision; I'm not gettin' paid for this. And as a matter of fact, I do have an idea. I won't go inside the hotel, but I sure can make getting to the front door easier if you don't mind waiting here for a minute."

[thehitmandeluxe-blog]

❝I was hoping you would have like a gnarly scar. Add character… And mystery.❞

❝You’re slutty, not easy. There’s a difference, semantically.❞

❝Oh I just want to put him/her in a bag of rocks and drop him/her in the river.❞

❝I’m all about giving. I’m like a bean-flicking Mother Teresa.❞

❝Seriously, enough clitorference.❞

❝If grateful paid the bills, we’d all be Bill Gates!❞

❝I spent a lot of time wondering if it would matter if I died.❞

❝The system’s fucked.❞

❝Do not defend your boner to me right now!❞

❝This one got away, but I swear to you I will die before I see that happen again. I will keep you safe.❞

❝I’m feeling some sapphic vibes comin’ off you.❞

❝Why did you take us to a gay bath house?❞

❝You know I can promise you that I’ve never been saner than I am right now.❞

❝I have mastered the art of shutting people off.❞

❝I made her come vaginally. Do you even know how hard that is to do? My point is…I don’t even know what my point is anymore.❞

❝You live on a slippery slope, kid, but for some reason you keep doing rain dances. Good luck.❞

❝I think I’ve moved beyond stress to something more deeply disturbing.❞

❝I love you and I fucking hate you.❞

❝Why do you always feel so inevitable to me?❞

❝Lesbian request denied.❞

❝That’s what love is like - it’s like coming home.❞

❝You got some fucked up priorities.❞

❝It’s not like I’m exactly overwhelmed with the possibilities.❞

❝Too hetero?❞

❝You’re supposed to be my family.❞

❝I always miss you until you’re here.❞

❝Don’t you fucking leave me.❞

❝Were you trying to pimp me out?❞

❝You know, another layer of icing on a shit cake does not make it taste good.❞

❝Oh, so here’s the thing     no.❞

❝Adventure is just hardship with an inflated sense of self.❞

❝No, this is divine retribution.❞

❝Do not project your conscience onto me.❞

❝I will fuck you. Literally.❞

❝I heart you.❞

❝You don’t just turn gay, you fall somewhere on a spectrum, like a Kinsey scale.❞

❝I would like to stress that I think this is truly fuckin’ stupid.❞

ᴏʀᴀɴɢᴇ ɪs ᴛʜᴇ ɴᴇᴡ ʙʟᴀᴄᴋ ɪɴsᴘɪʀᴇᴅ sᴇɴᴛᴇɴᴄᴇ ᴍᴇᴍᴇ (sᴏᴍᴇ ɴsғᴡ).

[thehitmandeluxe-blog]

general-envy:

She scowled at him. They were about to run into a secure building full of people who probably wanted to decapitate them, and all he could do was flick that bloody razor of his. Carribia was in, what she referred to as, battle mode. Her nerves were already high enough, without that irritating sound. “Really? Well just to clear things up a bit; can you stop flicking that bloody razor. I’m pretty sure you can hear it inside the hotel. Ever heard of a silent approach? Cause that’s what we’re going for.”

Sanguine responded with a scowl of his own. He was risking his neck for the Irish mages, for what? Nothing. That's what. He wasn't even being paid to help them win this damn war. He was still pissed off by the fact that he was running this mission with Carribia Envy instead of Tanith. He knew how Tanith worked. He didn't know anything about this other woman, only that she was in charge of him for this. And that didn't set well with the Texan. "Unless they've got a vampire, I doubt anyone can hear me flickin' a straight razor from this far out." He flicked it shut and slipped it back into his suit pocket. "Now, if you'd just let me tunnel, we wouldn' have to worry about a silent approach, now would we?"

[thehitmandeluxe-blog]

Open

He’d been snapping his fingers for the past five minutes but nothing was happening. He probably should have been practicing years ago instead of just focusing on tunneling, but in Sanguine’s defense, it wasn’t like he’d ever had the need to manipulate fire. A look of irritation flashed across the hitman’s face and he snapped his fingers again. Nothing. “This is bullshit. There ain’t any reason for me to be learnin’ this.”

[thehitmandeluxe-blog]

"How many times are you going to do that exactly?"

STRANGE SENTENCE STARTERSStatus || Accepting || general-envy

Sanguine flicked open his straight razor again just for the hell of it. The motion helped to relax his nerves about what he was going to do. It wasn’t often that he acted as one of the good guys. And the plan they’d come up with to break into the Midnight Hotel was hinged on the hopes that no extra security measures had been installed. “I’m sure I don’t have the faintest idea what you’re talkin’ about, darlin’,” he replied, turning his head towards Envy.

[thehitmandeluxe-blog]

Billy-Ray: Why don't people like me? Is it because I'm a magic user? Or is my hair too gelled? I try so hard to be a good lover to women. What's wrong with me?

Tanith: You're a sociopath.

[thehitmandeluxe-blog]

Billy-Ray Sanguine: Every Bonnie needs a Clyde.

Tanith Low: You know I'm the Clyde though, right?

[thehitmandeluxe-blog]

Skulduggery Pleasant Sentence Starters. 

“Doors are for people with no imagination.” 

“There’s no such thing as winning or losing. 

“There is won and there is lost, there is victory and defeat.”

“There are absolutes. Everything in between is still left to fight for.”

“Are you kidding? I jumped off a building – of course I’m hurt.”

“Since we’re all going to die horribly anyway, what’s there to be worried about?”

“Only a heathen would bring a gun to a sword fight.’

“And only a moron would bring a sword to a gunfight.” 

“Please forgive me,“ 

“I’m sophisticated, charming, suave and debonair, Professor. But I have never claimed to be civilised.” 

“Well, for future reference, this is my serious face.” 

“We don’t do what we do for the glory or the fame or the credit”

“We do it for the quiet satisfaction of making the world a better place”

  "Violence is never the answer, until it’s the only answer.” 

“But when honesty doesn’t work, lie, and lie convincingly.” 

“Punishment is not the answer. Punishment is easy. It’s lazy. Redemption is hard. Redemption makes you work.” 

[thehitmandeluxe-blog]

Okay, since we know that Sanguine is in fact an Elemental, I just want threads where's he's trying to learn how to use the other elements besides earth. Because imagine all the chaos that he could cause if he was able to displace air, throw fire, manipulate water, and disappear through solid ground. Anyways, I just want threads where he's learning things.