thejokerha

[thejokerha]

Kirishima: Bakugou sometimes talks in his sleep, it’s adorable.

Bakugou, asleep: Fight me… you motherfucker… square up… think the fuck not…

[thejokerha]

[Midoriya and Kirishima about to do something stupid]

Kirishima: What if we—

Iida and Bakugou, in unison: What if you don’t.

Midoriya: We haven't—

Iida and Bakugou: [Already getting up to drag their asses away]

[thejokerha]

Kaminari: Just do it Midoriya!

Midoriya: Are you sure this is how people ask each other out?

Kaminari: Yeah, dude.

Midoriya: Alright then…

Midoriya: Kacchan, will you be the top to my bottom?

Bakugou: [starts choking]

[thejokerha]

Mitsuki: Why are you always picking fights?

Bakugou: These hands are rated E for everyone.

[thejokerha]

Kirishima: You know, people say that Disneyland is the happiest place on Earth, but they’re wrong, ‘cause they’ve never been in Bakugou’s arms.

Hagakure: Of course we haven’t been in Bakugou’s arms, he’s terrifying.

Kaminari: One time I accidentally bumped into him in the kitchen, and he pulled out a switchblade.

[thejokerha]

Midoriya: Are you still a hero if nobody thinks you are?

Bakugou: I don't give a shit what other people think.

[thejokerha]

Young!Bakugou: I hate you. You hate me. Let's tie barney to a tree. Shoot him with a 44. No more purple dinosaur.

[thejokerha]

Bakugou: You need them to think you're stronger than you actually are.

Kirishima: That’s what you do?

Bakugou: Me? Oh, no. My power is no illusion. I can fucking demolish you.

[thejokerha]

Midoriya: You're such a dick, Kacchan.

Bakugou: Well, I am what I eat.

Midoriya: KACCHAN WHAT THE FU-

[thejokerha]

I want a BnHA Hogwarts!AU where Bakugou gets sorted into Hufflepuff solely because everyone (including the fucking sorting hat) thought he should be in Slytherin and he decided to be a petty bitch and subvert their expectations. So now we have the literal epitome of assholery dicking around with a bunch of Actual Sunshine Children and somehow managing to be both a terrible and wonderful influence at the same time.

Also no one fucks with Hufflepuff ever anymore because Bakugou is basically their guard dog now and will absolutely go full fucking feral at anyone who so much as looks at his housemates weirdly.

[thejokerha]

Broken Mirror (i like this picture better)

Broken Mirror (I Like This Picture Better)

A follow up/sequel to Invisible Scars where Katsuki is hit by a quirk that’s supposed to make mental scars visible. Only, it works a little differently for Katsuki than it does anyone else. Not only does it manifest some of his mental scars, but it also reveals all the scars he remembers but doesn’t have, as they themselves are also a form of mental scars. Everyone else is pretty fucking shocked by it, and Katsuki is torn between kinda relieved in some way, and also upset because he’s Katsuki and any level of emotional involvement is painful for him.

[thejokerha]

Deku: Name a way to be nice to people.

Kacchan: Don't kill them.

Deku: Setting the bar really low, but I'll allow it.

[thejokerha]

Class 1A as dumb things my friends have said

Aoyama: Makeup’s supposed to cover up all your flaws. Time to swallow my concealer and see if my depression goes away

Ashido: My bad grades don’t matter. School is just for the weak who aren’t pretty enough to get a sugar daddy

Tsuyu: Is Kermit a furry? Could he be my fursuit? Seriously guys I’ve been thinking about this all night

Iida: Being student president just means I have to speed walk everywhere and buy all the teacher’s coffee

Uraraka: I low key want a man to try and fight me. I’m ready to beat someone to death with my purse!!

Ojirou: Look I watched all the Kung Fu Panama movies so I really don’t think you wanna be messing with me I’m basically Bruce Lee

Kaminari: What do you mean we have homework today? Okay so be right back I’m just gonna go stick a fork into that outlet over there

Kirishima: The gay agenda? Excuse me do I look organized enough to carry around an agenda with me? More like the gay occasional phone notification

Kouda: Why do we keep reading depressing English stories where the pet dies at the end I’m actually going to start crying

Satou: This is the third time this week my mom has caught me trying to eat a whole tub of cream cheese frosting by itself I think she’s a little concerned

Shouji: In this world it’s either hug or be hugged and I’m very emotionally unstable so I’m pretty much down for both

Jirou: My Chemical Romance could come back for three seconds just to punch me in the face then break up again and I’d still be happy

Sero: If it’s too severe for duct tape to fix it it’s god way of saying it doesn’t need to be fixed

Tokoyami: Do you ever see a raven outside your house and immediately get concerned? Like I’ve read too many books I know what this symbolic shit means

Todoroki: I like to think I’m some dark and mysterious character with a tragic backstory but I over share my issues so often it doesn’t really matter anymore

Hagakure: I could never be invisible because I eat too many crunchy foods and laugh like a dying badger

Bakugou: I’m literally vividly picturing the deaths of everyone in the class right now. It’s so violent I’m almost concerned for myself

Midoriya: So update on the whole anxiety issue- a guy sneezed near me in the hallway so loud I got scared and started crying

Shinsou: God you know finals weeks sucks when you’re so sleep deprived a coma sounds like the world’s best nap

Yaoyorozu: I don’t know why people always complain when I answer questions in class like that’s one more question none of you ungrateful shits have to answer

[thejokerha]

Kidnapper: (on the phone) We have your brother.

Bakugou: What? I don’t have a brother.

Kidnapper: Then who the heck just asked for chocolate milk with a straw and made us cut the crusts off his PBJs?

Bakugou: Oh god, lmao.

Kidnapper: What?

Bakugou: That’s Deku. Listen, you can keep him.

[thejokerha]

Bakugou: *gets a paper cut* OW! Son of a bi-

Mirio: Bakugou! *gestures wildly to Eri* CHILDREN!

Bakugou: iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii-iiiiis-cuit.... Son of a biscuit.... That's it.

Mirio: Nice save!

Bakugou: Yeah, fuckin nailed it.

Mirio: Wh-? Bakugou!!

[thejokerha]

Midoriya: Can you pass the salt, please?

Bakugou: *yeets Todoroki across the table*

[thejokerha]

Midoriya: What the hell is wrong with you?

Bakugou: I have this weird self-esteem issue where I hate myself but still think I’m better than everyone else.