theknittingoracle

[theknittingoracle]

I am not meant for casual. I was born for soul crushing devotion.

[theknittingoracle]

[theknittingoracle]

at every customer service job i’ve worked at, during the initial introduction and workplace tour there’s always that moment where it stops being a professional ‘this is our workplace and these are the rules’ intro and becomes the ‘this is hell and these are the corners we can get away with cutting’ tour, i.e ‘this is the cupboard we go to sit and cry in during bad days’ and ‘you aren’t supposed to steal but we get minimum wage so nobody gives a shit if you take a handful of biscuits’.

with that in mind. Tim showing Damian the ropes of being Robin.

Tim: so after patrol you’re supposed to do a nightly report of any incidents at the batcomputer, i’ll show you the login and how the system works…

Bruce: *nods in satisfaction and walks away*

Tim, the second they’re alone: ok so to be honest you’re supposed to do it at the batcomputer so it’s thorough but none of us can be fucked with that so what we usually do is just keep a note on our phones of any major incidents and then on the way back to the cave we send a screenshot of it to Oracle and she inputs it remotely, it saves you like half an hour every night.

Damian: i see.

-

Tim: this is the weapon storage centre; at the end of the night every bat tool has to be accounted for and scanned into the system.

Damian: everything is to be returned to here?

Tim: yeah, Bruce’s orders. but what we haven’t told B is that Dick broke the scanning system years ago so if you want to nick a cool knife or grapple gun for everyday use then you can literally scan, like, an apple or something, and input the code as the item you’re stealing and Bruce never notices.

Damian: *intrigued*

Tim: i scanned a sharpie instead of a flamethrower i was supposed to return one night. Bruce still doesn’t know it’s in my school backpack.

-

Tim: this is the usual patrol route; that’s where we usually get to rest for fifteen minutes, by that 7-11 down there, and over in that alley there’s a really secluded abandoned balcony that no civilians can see.

Tim: that’s where we go during rough nights when we want to cry or stare into space for a few minutes.

Damian: good to know.

-

Tim: if you hurt a rogue too badly you’re supposed to log the injuries inflicted on them to Bruce’s online files so he gets flagged by any major incidents, but Jason figured out that if you tag the injury as ‘light skin trauma’ it will register in the system as a scratch and automatically get put in the ‘unimportant’ file which Bruce isn’t notified by. So even if you stab Scarecrow in the neck, as long as you tag it as ‘light skin trauma with metal implement’ Bruce won’t see it.

Tim: the same applies to our own injury reports, so like, if you ever can’t be fucked with having to sit still and be examined in the medbay after a busy patrol, that’s how you get around him knowing you’re hurt.

-

Tim: there’s supposed to be a limit on the amount of training you can do per day to stop us from ‘over doing it’ but if you time your workout to the evenings where Bruce works on the batmobile, then he never remembers to keep an eye on the timer and we get like an extra hour.

-

Tim: this is the only chandelier in the manor that Alfred can’t get to to clean it, so he relies on us to swing up and polish it every now and then. So if you smoke, up there is where Jason hides his stash.

Damian: …i am eleven.

Tim: Jason started when he was ten, i dont know.

-

Tim: you’re supposed to take water with you on patrol so we all have our own bottles that attach to the belt. Bruce checks that we have it but not what’s inside it, so you can fill it up with whatever. i usually go for coffee. one time Jason and Dick split a pint of margaritas in theirs and tried to see who could drink and swing the best. Dick hit a lamppost.

Damian:

Damian: …well yes. the pit enhanced Todd’s metabolism, so alcohol rarely will effect him.

Tim:

Tim: that sneaky motherfucker

Tim, turning away: DICK GUESS WHAT-

[theknittingoracle]

It's not just young adults complaining about how hard life is, "bootstraps" etc. We are literally DYING at higher rates than we should be.

What the actual fuck.

[theknittingoracle]

conversations overheard on the batkid com lines pt 12 (league days 3) masterpost here

Dick: ok do another one, do another one.

Damian: *grunt* *the sound of fists hitting faces* i just did one- *yelp* aren't you guys taking down a cartel tonight?!

Tim: yeah but we're just waiting around for things to kick off right now, come on, give us another one.

Damian: god- fine, hold on. *the metal shlink of a katana being unsheathed*

Jason: *snorts*

Tim: he's so nice to us...

*distant screams*

Dick: you are so, so lucky that B's on bed rest tonight Robin. so lucky.

Damian, strained: yeah, well, tonight i'm not Batman's Robin, i'm Red Hood's, and Red Hood's Robin gets shit done faster.

Jason: atta-fuckin'-boy. i found the files in the back room by the way, just let me know if you need help.

*a scream* *a metal shlink*

Jason: although you sound to be doing fine.

Damian: *sigh* alright done. ok... it's loading a card.

Tim: i swear to god, i'm going to fucking ace this one.

Dick: yeah, well you said that last round.

Tim: I MEAN IT THIS TIME.

Jason: *snickers*

Damian: alright. ready?

Dick: bring it on, kiddo.

Damian: 'apart from my father, there is one other member of the bat-community that i am biologically related to. that person... is Duke Thomas.'

Jason: oh this is gonna be awesome

Dick: *sputters* S O R R Y?

Damian: *sigh* well i suppose that's one way for it to come out.

Tim: there is NO GODDAMN WAY- HE'S BLACK.

Damian: and i'm white? don't be racist, Red Robin.

Tim: I JUST MEAN- there is no goddamn way. absolutely not. this is a nay, it's a lie. we'd know.

Damian: fine. is that your final answer?

*silence*

Tim: ...for the sake of the game. explain.

Dick: *laughs* *deliriously* this is ridiculous...

Damian: ...so... as you all know... Duke's mother is Elaine Thomas and his step-father is Doug Thomas, while his biological father was the criminal known as Gnomon.

Tim, begrudging: mhm.

Damian: but what was kept hidden from you is that shortly before Duke was born, Gnomon was an associate of the league of assassins, and was a close associate of my grandfather.

Tim: ok there is no goddamn way- why would Ra's care about Gnomon?!

Damian: how small-minded are you, Drake? Gnomon is an immortal entity, hundreds, perhaps thousands of years old. are you stupid enough to believe that my immortality obsessed grandfather couldn't have met Gnomon at some point in his life and decided to keep in contact so he could combine their knowledge for his own gain at some point in the future?

Dick: ...alright shit he has a point.

Tim: NO HE FUCKING DOESN'T? HOW DOES GNOMON BEING FRIENDS WITH RA'S EXPLAIN HIM AND DUKE BEING RELATED?

Damian: well-, oh, shit. There are more men approaching the warehouse, Hood.

Jason, gleeful: nah nah, you stay inside and keep answering questions, i got this.

*gunshots* *distant yells and screams of pain*

Damian: eight o'clock, sniper.

Jason: got it, now focus on the game.

Dick: beautiful priorities. Robin, carry on.

Damian: *sigh* fine, what is the next question?

Dick: how does Ra's and Gnomon's friendship explain your relation to Signal?

Damian: ah. well, you are aware that i was originally created to be a potential new vessel for my grandfather?

Jason: *grunt* *snorts* yeah, until you started info-dumping about parrot species and he decided he wasn't gonna touch that brain with a ten foot pole.

Damian: shut up, i thought you weren't allowed to partake in the game? ANYWAY, you all know that i was originally just a vessel, and thus i was modified in the loa labs to enhance my abilities,

Tim: UHM-?

Dick: woah woah woah woah- NO? WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU'RE A LAB CHILD?

Damian: ....oh you didn't? that's not even a part of the game, i thought you knew that.

Tim and Dick, simultaneously: WHAT?!!??!

Jason: ??? yeah, guys, he got pit-dipped at one point and everything. i used to sit with him on the operating table after experiments and read him books. Ra's used me for some of those experiments too so it was kinda like sharing a room.

Dick: DOES BRUCE KNOW-

Damian: well i fucking thought he did but if you're all gonna be dramatic about it then i don't want to check...

Dick: DRAMATIC? DAMIAN, WE NEED TO-

Tim: Dick shut the fuck up a minute,

Dick: eh?!?

Tim: no- just, you know, it is a big deal and i'm happy to freak out about our little brother being experimented on later tonight, but for now... kinda trying to lock in on this fucking game.

Jason: *wheeze*

Tim: so you were experimented on, go on.

Damian: .........well... part of that experiment included mixing my DNA with that what grandfather believed might make me immortal, and he had asked Gnomon to kindly donate some DNA samples some decades back. so they were incorporated into my genetic make-up, meaning that some of my parental heritage technically belongs to Duke's father, making us biological half-siblings.

Dick, sarcastically: and you just decided never to mention it?

Tim: that's it, call Duke, i don't care if he's asleep-

Jason: ah-ah-ah-! no phone-a-friends!

Damian: -well Hood knew as he was aware of the experiments i went under, and of course i told Duke; apart from that it simply didn't seem relevant.

Tim: didn't seem relevant.

Dick: and Duke didn't think it was relevant either?!

Damian: ...to be honest, i don't think my brother wanted to start up another bout of batfamily drama. especially not one he was centric too. he found it funnier to keep it under wraps and watch from the side-lines.

*silence*

Tim: ...fuck that does sound like Duke.

Dick, amused: Tim-

Tim: NO. NO, DICK. BECAUSE THIS KEEPS FUCKING HAPPENING-

Jason: -you guys are on a stakeout, should you be saying his name so loud-?

Tim: AND THE CRAZIEST SHIT IS ALWAYS THE SHIT THAT'S TRUE! WE ALWAYS GET IT WRONG AND IT'S DRIVING ME INSANE.

Dick: ok but listen to him, there is no way that Dames and Duke are-

Tim: OK BUT WE SAID THAT ABOUT THE ALLIGATOR STORY, AND THE ONE IN PARIS, AND THE THING ABOUT THE LAVA-,

Damian: *snorts*

Tim: -AND HE'S FUCKING LAUGHING AT US-

Dick: BECAUSE HE KNOWS HE'S LYING,

Tim: -OR, OR BECAUSE HE'S TELLING THE TRUTH AND HE'S SMUG ABOUT THE AMOUNT OF CHAOS THIS PARTICULAR SECRET IS CAUSING.

Jason: holy fuck is that Black Mask-? uh, ok, wrap this up, me and my Robin for the night got business to attend to.

Damian: very well. final answers, you two. yay or nay?

*silence*

Tim: *screech of despair*

Dick: *cackle* ok, i'm saying nay, there's no way.

Damian: Red Robin?

Tim: .....um.

Tim: FUCK.

Dick, laughing: Tim,

Tim: LAST TIME I THOUGHT ONE OF THESE WAS RIDICULOUS IT WAS THE TRUTH! THE RIDICULOUS ONES ARE ALWAYS YAYS, IT'S RIDICULOUS.

Jason: that word has lost all meaning.

Damian: well?

Tim: fuck. ok i'm saying yay. yay, sure, whatever. it's the truth. give it to me. i'm fine. tell me now.

Jason: *snorts* Robin?

Damian: ...of course it's a nay, why on earth-

*the sound of something smashing against concrete*

Tim: OH- OH OF COURSE- WHY THE FUCK- OBVIOUSLY IT'S A FUCKING LIE, WHO THE FUCK WOULD HAVE BELIEVED THAT OBVIOUS BULLSHIT-

Jason: *wheezing*

Dick: Red, Red calm down- *wheeze*

Tim: HE SAID THAT HE AND FUCKING SIGNAL WERE RELATED, WHY THE FUCK WOULD THAT HAVE BEEN REAL? WHY WOULD ANYBODY- i'm going to fucking kill myself. i can't- i'm going to-

Dick: ok well you may not have to, because you totally gave away our position and i can see like three guns pointed in our- ok fuck DUCK-

*rapid gunshots*

Tim: I HATE THIS FUCKING GAME- FUCK-

Dick: RED SWITCH LINES WE GOTTA FOCUS HERE.

Damian: sucks to suck, Drake. see you two back at the cave.

*two pings*

*silence*

Jason: Black Mask is staring at me from across the street. he sees us, Robin.

*a beat*

Damian: Hood, what are you- are you having a fucking staring contest with him?

Jason: shut up, you're gonna distract me.

Damian: you're wearing a face-covering helmet-

Jason: I SAID SHUT UP I'M WINNING THIS THING.

[theknittingoracle]

Ok so my kid had an ear infection, right? As kids often do.

The doctor scraped out a bit of earwax to have a better look inside.

I was sent a bill for $200 PER EAR for this 5 second procedure which I did not give permission for them to do.

That was key- they did not ASK me if they could do this "procedure". And, as I OWN a medical practice (it's me. The medical practice is me, sitting in my house on video calls) I knew to call them when this bill came in to be like "You did not obtain informed consent for this procedure, and it was not en emergency procedure. You had full ability to gain my consent and didn't. I'm not paying."

And the massive hospital who owned the bill said "yuh-huh you do have to pay."

And I said "I own a practice. I know these laws. I do not owe you money for this."

And they conducted an "internal review" and SURPRISE! Decided I totally owed them money and they had never done anything wrong ever.

And so I called my state's Attorney General office, and explained the situation because, as I mentioned, I know the law. The AG got in touch within a couple days to say they were taking the case and would send the massive hospital conglomerate a knock it off, guys letter.

Lo and Behold, today I have a letter where said hospital graciously has agreed to forfeit the payment.

"How not to get screwed over by companies" should be part of civics class.

Know your rights and know who to call when they're infringed on. This whole process cost me $0 and honestly less effort than I would have expected.

May this knowledge find its way to someone else who can use it.

[theknittingoracle]

merry talks to kids in ithilien like ‘and remember: you’re NEVER too small to fight an unspeakable ancient eldritch horror’ and eowyn says ‘he’s right you’re not’ and faramir’s like PLEASE don’t

[theknittingoracle]

*post reveal*

Merlin: fuck, are you going to kill me?

Arthur: what, no, of course not. You're my best friend, I already knew. I was just waiting for you to tell me. I am working on legalizing magic, you wanna help????

Merlin: oh my god. This is everything I've ever dreamed of

Arthur: haha, yeah :)

...

Arthur grabs Leon by the shoulders: Leon!!!! I fucked up!!!! I did NOT know about his magic!!!!

[theknittingoracle]

ok well really you mean women specifically are doing this. this was already normal for men lol

[theknittingoracle]

[theknittingoracle]

Women were successfully creating women’s shelters during a time where women’s shelters were actively illegal, marital rape was legal, no-fault divorce wasn’t legal, and women were legally discriminated against in the workplace and couldn’t reliably get back accounts without a husband’s permission.

And nowadays TRAs are demanding biological males be let into women’s shelters where they routinely abuse the already-traumatized women there because they claim they simply can’t create shelters of their own. With none of the obstacles our foremothers faced in their way, trans activists are acting like it’s just too difficult for them to create their own shelters. What complete BS.

[theknittingoracle]

I’m sorry, but I really don’t understand how Shelly Miscavige is still missing and this hasn’t become a national police hunt level thing.

How many people have filed police reports on a missing women, well known and married to a wealthy man who’s the head of an international church, and nothing has come of it.

There’s a whole dead woman somewhere and we all know she’s dead (or, idk, locked in a cage in a basement) and no one seems to care?

[theknittingoracle]

I think Bleach is the funniest Shonen anime solely because even though every character gets an outfit change with their power-ups the creator still took pains to establish that one random guy is actually just a fancy little freak and hand-sews garments for fun and that's why HE has a special outfit. Even though he also later gets an outfit change with his power-up also

[theknittingoracle]

I have so much more respect for any historical fiction shows or movies that include historically accurate hairstyles even when they look weird and dumb to modern eyes. You get rid of those beach waves this minute, you fucking cowards.

[theknittingoracle]

"being trans is a choice" do you honestly think i would CHOOSE to get gender euphoria from wearing knee-length basketball shorts?? that's humiliating

[theknittingoracle]

[theknittingoracle]

The Acrylic Yarn Debate: Love It or Leave It?

Few topics in the knitting world spark as much conversation as acrylic yarn. Some crafters swear by it, others avoid it entirely, and many land somewhere in between. But why is this humble, synthetic fiber such a hot topic?

What Is Acrylic Yarn?

Acrylic yarn is made from synthetic fibers (usually polyacrylonitrile) rather than natural fibers like wool or cotton. It's meant to mimic natural fibers. It first became widely available in the mid-20th century as an affordable, washable alternative to wool, and it’s been a craft store staple ever since.

The Case for Acrylic

1. Affordable & Accessible Acrylic yarn is budget-friendly, making it ideal for beginners or large projects like blankets where cost can add up quickly. You’ll find it almost anywhere—from big-box stores to dollar shops.

2. Easy Care Most acrylic yarns are machine washable and dryable. This makes them a popular choice for gifts, charity projects, and items for kids or pets—basically anything that will see heavy use.

3. Endless Colors Manufacturers can produce acrylic yarn in virtually any color or effect—neons, pastels, self-striping, glitter-infused—you name it.

4. Allergy-Friendly For people allergic to animal fibers, acrylic can be a safe and comfortable alternative.

The Case Against Acrylic

1. Breathability & Comfort Acrylic doesn’t breathe the way natural fibers do. This can make it feel warmer (or sweatier) in certain climates and less pleasant to wear next to the skin. If you're making a summer garment, I'd steer clear of acrylic yarn.

2. Environmental Impact Because it’s petroleum-based and non-biodegradable, acrylic has a significant environmental footprint. Microplastics can also shed during washing.

3. Feel & Wear Over Time While high-quality acrylics can be surprisingly soft, cheaper ones may feel squeaky or rough. Acrylic is also prone to pilling and may lose shape more quickly than wool or cotton.

4. Blocking Limitations Acrylic doesn’t respond to blocking in the same way natural fibers do—you can “kill” it with steam to set its shape, but it’s a one-way street (no frogging and re-blocking).

Finding the Middle Ground

Like most things in the fiber world, there’s no single right answer—it’s about matching the yarn to the project:

Baby blankets & charity hats? Acrylic is practical and low-maintenance.

A luxury sweater you’ll wear for years? You might prefer wool, alpaca, or a blend.

Outdoor décor or pet accessories? Acrylic can stand up to wear and weather.

Many knitters also explore blends—acrylic mixed with wool, cotton, or bamboo—to get the benefits of both worlds.

The Bottom Line

Acrylic yarn isn’t “good” or “bad.” It’s a tool, and like any tool, its value depends on how you use it. Understanding its strengths and weaknesses means you can make intentional choices—whether that’s embracing it, avoiding it, or keeping it in your stash for the perfect project.

And remember: the best yarn is the one that makes you excited to knit.