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themilosquid · 2 days
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ok enough is enough. whichever one of you virgins invented instagram starbucks recipes, die 1000 deaths. I had a customer come in today holding out their phone (full brightness) and looking all shy and Im immediately like 🙄 fine ok, what does the instagram user want me to make for them this time. well this time it's a cringe harry potter themed frappucino. excuse me??? "can you make this for me?" I said excuse me??? -- I mean *customer service voice* "yeah it looks like I have all the ingredients, haha sure!"
ok cringe instagram harry potter frappucino drinker. ok. die. "Ive never had this drink before" yeah I can tell due to the fact that it didnt exist until someone posted a #aesthetic photo of it to instagram 14 hours ago ok. ok,
but whatever, Im paid to put up with this shit. so I add the ingredients all up on my computer and congrats! ur harry potter cringe social media drink has $10 worth of syrup in it. are you happy??? is this what you wanted??? a $10 frappucino??? $10. for a drink. you doubled the price of this drink for ur off-brand "harry potter and the legend of the overpriced starbucks drink" drink. you doubled the price!!! is this how u imagined spending ur day? is this what u wanted to do when u woke up this morning? $10 for a 24oz drink?
and u know, you KNOW the influencer making this recipe doesn't even work at a starbucks cause when it was all said and done the drink looked like shit. my blender was straining against the weight of your sins (and syrups) and Im sweating, Im an animal, Im losing my mind and my blender is getting watered down frappucino syrups everywhere -- u put so much shit liquid in this blender it doesnt even fit in the cup btw. it's making a huge mess. but is it instagramable? no, its fucking ugly. #trending #foryoupage #cringe $10 harold potter drink for adult children,
so are you happy? is ur social media influencer bestie happy? I made ur stupid $10 drink for u. does it taste good? no? well I hope instagram shuts down tomorrow. I hope you read a different book. I hope I never get sober. there is no sign of land. I hope you die. I hope we both die.
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themilosquid · 2 days
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love it when my friends say "you would do numbers on Tumblr" buddy I am on Tumblr. and the number is 3
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themilosquid · 4 days
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It literally is
I'm really sorry for the things I said and did when my mom was rushing me.
I'm in an abusive relationship with her you see
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themilosquid · 4 days
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themilosquid · 4 days
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I don’t feel anything anymore…
(Psss, @cookii-moon I know it’s been over a year but maybe you’re still interested)
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themilosquid · 4 days
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Just realized that the reason I love making friends on tumblr is because it’s exactly how you make friends on the playground as a six year old. No, I don’t know their name but they love mermaids too and built this awesome sand castle. No, I don’t know their age but their imaginary cheetah is friends with mine. You like this show? You like this character?? You can sing the theme song really loud??? Here is a flower crown. Here is a juice box. You can share my time and I might never see you again but part of you stays in my soul forever. In my mind we’re still on the swing set and the sky is blue and nothing will ever be wrong again.
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themilosquid · 4 days
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Ghost shenanigans
(Don’t know if you can see the tears burning him but I tried)
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themilosquid · 4 days
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I'm really sorry for the things I said and did when my mom was rushing me.
I'm in an abusive relationship with her you see
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themilosquid · 4 days
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that article going around abt firefox's new ad program is annoying bc it's phrased as though "mozilla has finally TURNED on its people and is SELLING YOU OUT for cold hard cash!!" when. that's not what's happening. it is specifically being implemented to discourage tracking behavior, and literally all the data they are giving to advertisers is aggregate and anonymized, which is like, the opposite of what that post wants you to worry about, lol
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themilosquid · 4 days
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joking that an adult character who acts childish doesnt know what sex is will never be as funny as saying the same thing about a big tough murderman videogame protag
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themilosquid · 4 days
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99% of ramblers quit right before they conceive of a coherent thought. KEEP TALKING
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themilosquid · 4 days
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themilosquid · 4 days
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I am so weak for Cole-Nya friendship/siblinghood.........
WAAAAAAAAAAAAH
Here’s have some sketches of the ninja being affectionate with each other cuz I love them sm
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References below the cut! (Since these are screenshot redraws )
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themilosquid · 4 days
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themilosquid · 4 days
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THEY WOULD DEF BE FRIENDS
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themilosquid · 4 days
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WAKE UP BABE!!!!!ITS TLNM'S ANNIVERSARY TODAY!!!!! 22ND SEPTEMBER!!!!!LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOO happy 7th anniversary to THE movie ever 🫶🫶
Hq ver
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themilosquid · 4 days
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