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[themistakenbrother-blog]

"I see you've kept your spot on the welcoming committee."

  [the blonde doesn’t bother sparing a glance at the new company, greeting them by bringing the glass to her lips and draining its contents. ]

              ❝ Unless you’re planning on getting me another I suggest you leave. ❞

[themistakenbrother-blog]

"Wait 'til you try the sequel. Not that I've read it,"

"There's a lot of talk.."

"Reading Twilight again as a vampire is so amusing."

[themistakenbrother-blog]

"I've got whiskey. Close enough."

“I could really use some coffee right now.“

[themistakenbrother-blog]

Great. Keep the tinsel and carolors out of my house or both will disappear never to be seen again. Capichce? 

Oh come on, Damon! It isn’t that bad, especially with me in charge of the whole thing.

[themistakenbrother-blog]

[themistakenbrother-blog]

"Girlfriend stealing brother?" Damon hissed, "She practically danced into my bed. You hate admitting it to yourself but I didn't whisk her away from anyone, it was her choice." Damon's words got adamantly fiercer with each word. If there was one thing he was going to stand up for, it would be the girl he knew he loved. The girl who loved him just the same. "And don't you dare let Stefan trick you into seeing through his twisted sire bond cult theory. He's just jealous because, for once, he was the one left in the ditch to clean his own wounds. Wounds that I refuse to be responsible for!" Damon realized he was yelling but he needed to get his point through Caroline's thick skull. "What is so bad about your best friend being in love with me? Why does it affect you so much?" His black eyes tore into her own with a seething rage. "Just give me one goddamn reason!"

"The girlfriend stealing brother, wants to judge the single friend for an imaginary thing in their mind. I do not look him up and down every day thank you. " Caroline’s eyes narrowed at him. She wanted to hit him but really, fighting right now would solve basically nothing. It was pointless because it never ended, it was a constant argument. "Stefan is off trying to relax. And by relax I mean not chewing on innocent people, and no he isn’t in my bed although you keep bringing it up."

[themistakenbrother-blog]

Holidays makes me want to scrape my eyes out with a cheese grater.

[themistakenbrother-blog]

"Ugh, I can never tell. You always seem to teeter on the edge of narcissism and self-loathing." Damon huffed at her unflinching ability to drive a stick up his ass. "Where's my brother? I assumed you would know seeing as your prodding judgy eyes look him up and down every day." Damon simulated a dry heave at the thought. "And if you won't tell me, I'll go looking for him, though if I find him draped in your bed sheets there will be hell to pay." Damon tried to shake the rather disturbing images out of his mind.

"Oh please, I don’t need improvement on my face. Of all the things you have made sure to talk down about on me, I do happen to know that part of me is just fine thank you" Caroline rolled her eyes. "And I do too but that still doesn’t keep you from being here right now does it? Why are you bothering me? Need something new to do?"

[themistakenbrother-blog]

Damon widened his eyes in surprise that showed for only a moment at his brother's colorful demand. "Wow..we learned a new word in kindergarten today." The elder Salvatore rolled his eyes at Stefan's usual care spiel. "Because I'm your brother goldilocks. It's my job to keep you mentally stable. You can travel the world as much as your little Oprah-heart desires on the condition you aren't leaving bloody stumps for me to sweep up." His eyes followed the angsty vampire as he ambled over to the bed and knocked the unfortunate lady's head off. "Exhibit A," Damon muttered under his breath. "Grab your stuff, we're going," he called out over his shoulder, "It's time to enter vampire rehab in the Salvatore Mansion. I wonder what Elena has to say about all this.." They were definitely going to have lots of car talk. Maybe he could fish out Stefan's heart before Stefan fished pumping organs out of living towns and cities. That is, if he was willing to leave. "We can leave the easy, self accepting way or we can leave kicking and screaming like a candyless child. You're choice." He offered slyly, giving Stefan one of his overly dramatic smiles.

            {☠}When the figure standing in his doorway turned out to be his older brother Damon a disappointed sigh slipped out from between his lips. “You’re the last person I expected to see, Damon.” And without another second wasted Stefan dashed over to the location where he kept his clothes and put on a pair of jeans, all the while hearing Damon invite himself inside. Being treated as a child was nothing new but Stefan expected no less of him. Damon always tried to change either the way he lived or acted. It was starting to get a little annoying. “Fuck off Damon,” Was all Stefan felt like saying but knowing how stubborn his older brother could be he continued. “Why do you exactly care what I do? I thought the subtle hint of not staying in Mystic Falls was a given.” Stefan never understood Damon’s logic. This was the way Stefan choose to live his life so why did he care so much? They were not as ‘close’ as they used to be and whenever they did stay in the same room as each other they always ended up fighting, like now. Heading over to the blood stained bed Stefan kicked the woman that was resting on top of it to the floor and what a surprise; she wasn’t just dead but decapitated as well.

[themistakenbrother-blog]

Damon widened his eyes in surprise and disgust at how comfortable Stefan had made himself. "You're quite ticky. Mind if I pop in for a visit?" Before waiting for the answer that would be an obvious no, he swept into the front room. Stefan always went lavish on his hotel visits, and this trip wasn't much different. He had rented the closest thing to a penthouse the shithole had. Turning the corner, Damon was greeted with bloody women dispersed on the rug and bed. "Ah, kinky bloodplay Stefan is at large. I can see the title now. "A sexy Pete Wentz look alike walks in on his brother's mass blood orgy. The norm." Turning towards Stefan, he tried his hardest to keep his eyes above the nude figure. "C'mon there has to be like, a hundred towels in here. Just choose one. Now, here's the plan. You're going to clean this mess up and we're going leave this place and pretend this never happened. Maybe if you're a good little boy we can get some ice cream on the way home."

[themistakenbrother-blog]

"Have you thought about how they might be improving your face?" Damon cocked his head, his thin lips stretching into a small smirk. "I think you owe little Thumper an apology." Damon rolled his eyes at her guess. "My alter ego has better fish to fry."

"You saying I’m being attacked by rabbits in my sleep? I never ate bunnies so that is a horrible guess. Unless they are trying to get to Stefan by messing up my face I don’t see it. May be your alter ego coming to get me"

[themistakenbrother-blog]

15

15. Our muses are cadets in Star Fleet academy, they’re new roommates and don’t get along at all.

"You know, finding things around here would be a lot simpler if I wasn't swimming up to my ass in your dirty clothes." He grunted, hurling a pile of her bras from their, unfortunately, shared desk. "Keep your useless crap on your side of the room. It's not rocket science. Speaking of rocket science, how the hell did your limited amount of brain cells get you up here in the first place?"

[themistakenbrother-blog]

Who do you ship with your damon?

I ship Katherine and Elena. Not sure about anyone else..(My Stefan rp account could use some Caroline/Katherine lovin')

[themistakenbrother-blog]

i want to rp with you, but i don't know where your damon is? where is he, canonically, i mean? season 1, 2, 3, 4, 5? au?

Sorry, I haven't checked my messages in a decade. Damon is wherever you would like him to be. Generally season five however I love single/life of the party Damon so I suppose it depends on mood.

[themistakenbrother-blog]

Without looking, put a number between 1-42 in my ask box! [grab bag edition]

So you all know how these go, below the cut is a list of 42  RP prompts that came to me. If you’re feeling extra brave, reblog without looking! This list has a nice mix of shippy, non-shippy, fluffy, cracky, angsty, nsfw, and sfw and such forth. Who knows what you’ll get?  *Also gender and sexuality neutral!

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[themistakenbrother-blog]

"Maybe it's teen angst. Or maybe you've just been sipping one too many bunny-rabbits and caught yourself a violent alter ego."

"Explain to me how I go to sleep, and wake up like someone has been scratching at my face."

[themistakenbrother-blog]

"Oh honey, the only way to deal with you is a snap of the neck." He pushed his lips together in sneer and fiddled with the bottle on the bar. Looking up at her through a tipsy haze, he opened his mouth, giving her his trademarked blue-ribbon smile. "Would ya' look at how time has turned the tables. If I had been told a century ago that Katherine Pierce might be pleading with me, well, I would have gasped with laughter. You're getting everything you deserve." His face darkened and he stared at her with the memories of his and Stefan's torture embedded in his mind. "Go find someone else to mooch off of. Healthy hint: try finding someone whose life you haven't destroyed. You might get more luck."

               Katherine rolled her eyes, a sigh escaping her pink lips, flush with a rush of blood associated with alcohol. “Ouch.” she quipped, sardonically, “That really hurts.” Her voice was flat as she took the rest of her drink and emptied it in between parted lips. She shifted to the next seat over and closer to Damon, eyes full of a blurry need to distract herself. “Seriously, I’m not going to beg and I can hardly make you do anything…” she mused, “But, trust me, the less sober I am the easier I will be to deal with.”