themothofman

[themothofman]

cant afford therapy does anybody know any frasier kinnies

[themothofman]

YOU hate JK Rowling!

[themothofman]

When we were children, my sister had private music lessons at her violin teacher’s house. I only visited there once, but I still remember that afternoon. The teacher had an artificial pond in her yard, a large beautiful thing with lily pads and plant life. And in the pond, there were goldfish. I had never seen such enormous goldfish. 

I spent several minutes just staring at them (and trying to convince them to bite my fingers.) When my sister’s violin lesson ended, her teacher came out to the yard and explained that these goldfish were the same small creatures that were often unfortunately sold in plastic bags at state fairs. They were only about two inches long apiece, when she bought them and put them in the new, empty pond. In essence, they were like every goldfish I had seen before, but they had been given a much larger, much richer environment in which to flourish. As a result, they had grown into some of the most remarkable, vibrant creatures my twelve-year-old self had ever met with. All because of a pond. 

Funny what lessons children remember. My sister doesn’t play the violin anymore, but that was the first time I caught a glimpse of the overwhelming extent to which it matters, the way the world treats us.

[themothofman]

I watched the hidenburg burn and your home will be next

[themothofman]

God is dead and mother earth is slowly dying

Do whatever you please, You want to eat another slice of cake? Do it

You want to fight the omnipotent owl that stares and speaks in riddles? Its your life buddy

You think kpop is good? Enjoy it

You miss 1478? Perish i guess, We cant go back

bake some bread

[themothofman]

Stop reblogging this! I don't want this to be my most famous post!

So since Gavin is Gen Z and Hank is a Millennial we know that they 100% quote vines

Gavin: Road work ahead?

Hank, from across the precinct: UH YEAH, I SURE HOPE IT DOES

Connor, LED spinning red: ????

Hank: Four female ghostbusters?

Gavin, from Fowler’s office: The feminists are taking over!

In unison: IM AN ADULT VIRGIN

Connor, hiding under a desk: ???

[themothofman]

Jaskier after Geralt yelled at him:

[themothofman]

you cant change my mind

[themothofman]

there are plenty of fish in the sea but not actually bc overfishing & pollution are huge problems. haven’t u noticed how expensive seafood is

[themothofman]

Mood after seeing all the cishet nonsense in Rise of Skywalker

[themothofman]

got these one after the other and read it like a bully

[themothofman]

Who would win in a fight?

Stanley Fucking Uris. Stan is the ONLY loser who could win a physical fight? My evidence:

Eddie; Too Baby

Richie; He's a wimp

Bill; Also a wimp

Mike; He wouldn't get into a fight

Ben; He's too nice to fight

Bev; I love Bev as much as anyone but I don't think she'd win a fight. She wouldn't go down without giving the other person some injuries but she wouldn't win

Stan could absolutely destroy anyone in a fair fight. That's why Pennywise had to kill him, if he hadn't then Eddie would have survived and Pennywise wouldn't even get a chance to taunt them.

[themothofman]

me walking into the third rail back private office in goodneighbor to witness winlock and barnes hounding maccready:

[themothofman]

RK900: The file is on your desktop. So is a muffin, orange juice and coffee.

Gavin: What would I do without you?

RK900: Starve.

[themothofman]

girl in novel: hi my older brother who is 17 years old and popular, do you want breakfast ?

her brother: yes, remember when mom died when you were 4 and our dad is an alcoholic ?

[themothofman]

karp a didum my peeps

[themothofman]

LISTEN UP AGAIN KIDS STOP REBLOGGING THIS FUCKING GARBAGE POST. IT IS 100% FUCKING BULLSHIT AND CAN AND MOST DEFINITELY WILL LITERALLY KILL. DO YOU NOT SEE WARNING LABELS THAT SAY “DO NOT INDUCE VOMITING”? THEY AREN’T FUCKING AROUND. YOU CAN FUCKING BURN THEIR ESOPHAGUS BY CAUSING VOMITING, CAUSE CHOKING, DROWNING, OR MAKE IT WORSE! AGAIN DO NOT FORCE ANYTHING DOWN ANYONE’S THROAT. THEY. CAN. DROWN. IF SOMEONE IS LOSING CONCIOUSNESS ALL THE CHIT CHAT IN THE WORLD WILL NOT PREVENT IT AT THAT POINT THEY ARE IN SERIOUS DANGER. “Buuut i don’t wanna take them to the hospital!!!” WELL SUNSHINE GLAD YOU’D RATHER HAVE A DEAD FRIEND THAN A LIVING ONE BUT YOU’RE IN LUCK CALL FUCKING POISON CONTROL. THEY ARE NOT THE COPS. THEY WILL HELP YOU. AND IF THEY SAY GO TO THE FUCKING HOSPITAL YOU GO TO THE FUCKING HOSPITAL. NO EXCUSES. 0. NONE. I have seen this shit cross my dash SO MANY TIMES so PLEASE fucking reblog this and prevent some well meaning idiot from accidentally killing someone they love!