theschuylerbrothers - Tumblr blog

[theschuylerbrothers]

wish i were alive in 2000 BCE so i could have devoted my life to the moon goddess and die at the old age of 28

[theschuylerbrothers]

u know what's great? im not in highschool anymore

[theschuylerbrothers]

Ummm okay how can I rewatch that episode right away I have FEELINGS

[theschuylerbrothers]

so anybody gonna post a video of the kiss or what

[theschuylerbrothers]

me to my alarm in the morning: I was literally sleeping but go off I guess

[theschuylerbrothers]

if i were dating you. well, heh. let’s just say horses wouldn’t be called ‘horses’ anymore.

hey what the fuck does this mean

[theschuylerbrothers]

The March 2018 March For Our Lives protests…

[theschuylerbrothers]

[theschuylerbrothers]

#indenial

+ cheyenne’s not convinced, jonah

[theschuylerbrothers]

he deserves it

[theschuylerbrothers]

today i was talking to my coworker jess and she said to me “i’ve been trying to think of how to tell my husband that i want a horse. i’m really non confrontational and i don’t know how to tell him. like, thanks for the flowers, but i want a horse.” and i was like, “well, you could always send him subliminal messages. like tape pictures of horses all over the walls and stuff” and she gave me this really weird look and was like “i said divorce not horse“ oh my god…

[theschuylerbrothers]

not to sound like jane austen or anything but if ur fic is labelled slow burn those two fucks better not even touch pinkies until like chapter 57 by the time they are even in a room alone together i want to be half dead of blueballs and i want their heated gazes to revive me im js 

[theschuylerbrothers]

i love experiencing how my classmates work to avoid misgendering me. for instance, today one classmate greeted the rest of our small group: “All right ladies and gentlemen — and Avery”

another time a classmate went: “Pardon me, ma’am — uh, sir, uh….esteemed one”

and, my absolute fave: “Hey ladies! — and gentleThem”

i love these moments both because they’re humorous and because they show how hard these folks are trying! it’s not about getting it right every time at first, but consistently correcting yourself!

[theschuylerbrothers]

It’s 2007. You’re working on a PowerPoint for school. It’s about ancient Egypt. You select the Papyrus font.

“Yes, Perfect”

[theschuylerbrothers]

a waitress could slit my throat and I’d still tip 15% i dont know how her day’s been yknow?

[theschuylerbrothers]

if you only know burnin’ up, s.os., and lovebug then i dont wanna hear you talk about the jonas brothers reunion

[theschuylerbrothers]

Me: I’m not going to turn into a hand made clay jug tonight !

Me after 7 tequila shots: