thethinginthecouch - Tumblr blog

thethinginthecouch · 3 months

Text

Alfred knows Danny from long ago during his secret service days. He always found the other odd, but his company was enjoyable enough to overlook. They were friends for a short while. Danny even saved his life once or twice. However, despite their trust in each other, they didn’t keep in touch. It was like Danny disappeared and he never heard from the jolly man again. That is until Danny showed up at the Wayne manor decades later looking the same as when they parted ways carrying the daughter he talked so much about.

Danny stood on the front porch with a toddler Ellie in his arms. She’s been behaving wonderfully. The new environment gave her curious self something to look at and distract her from a tantrum.

He rings the doorbell awkwardly with her in one arm and a bag of supplies resting on his shoulder.

If things were any different he wouldn’t be here, but he’s got to do what he’s got to do even if it’s the last scenario.

Footsteps can be heard on the other side before it opens to reveal a boy in sweatpants and a hoodie. It’s a little warm for the summer and Danny expects they have an expensive electric bill for this large place.

The kid, Damian Wayne he remembers, scowls. He gives Danny a once over with narrowed eyes.

“How’d you get through the gate?” Damian demands.

Danny blinks and adjusts Ellie on his hip.

“I walked of course.” Damian grows even more suspicious and Danny decides to change the subject. “I’m Danny. Danny Fenton. And this little monster is Ellie. Want to say hello, Ells?”

Ellie looks at Damian for all of three seconds before losing interest.

“No.”

Danny sighs. Yea, he was expecting that answer. It’s her favorite word at the moment.

“Why are you here?” Damian asks.

Straight to the point then.

“I’m looking for Alfred Pennyworth. Is he around? It’s urgent.”

“What is it concerning?” Damian straightens his spine to appear taller but it doesn’t change the head difference.

Danny sets Ellie down on the brick when she won’t stop squirming to be let down. She doesn’t waste a moment wandering away to investigate her surroundings. Damian raises a brow while watching her.

“I’m cashing in that favor he owns me.”

That got the boy’s attention. He studies the adult for a moment before opening the door wider for the both of them to enter.

Danny manages to wrangle Ellie into the house with Damian’s judgmental gaze following them. The bag had slid down to his elbow when he bends down to hold Ellie’s hand to steady her.

It’s as Damian is closing the front door that a man comes around the corner in a butler uniform. The same man he was looking for.

Alfred freezes after registering who was in front of him. The older of the two sighs heavily. Shoulders back and chin high, as expected he approaches this situation with a level head and posh dignity.

“Daniel,” addresses Alfred. “I wasn’t expecting you.”

Danny cringes. He really should have called with a warning but there wasn’t time. He also always hated it when Alfred refused to use Danny’s preferred nickname, a sort of teasing that was consistent. If Alfred was anything, he’s stubborn enough to do what he wants and get away with it.

“Sorry, Alf. Next time for sure.” Danny sends a cheeky grin that doesn’t impress anyone. He glances over at his daughter to see her trying to touch the expensive looking vase on a side table.

“Ellie!” He dashes over to pull her away which immediately starts a struggle war and fussing. He knows if he lets this continue it will turn into a full blown tantrum.

“That’s not ours, we can’t touch it without permission.” She whines in frustration. “Do you want to ask if it’s okay to touch? Gently?”

Ellie thinks about it a second before looking up at him. Danny nods in understanding and turns her a bit to look at the two spectators.

“Toush?” She asks with an adorable chubby arm raised to point at the vase.

“Are you going to break it?” Damian asks with folded arms.

“Master Damian, I’m sure that’s not her intention.” Alfred turns with a smile back to Ellie. “That vase is fragile. Can you be very careful?”

Obviously her answer is a confident nod of the head and immediately trying to reach out again. Danny helps to lift her and hold her wrist steady.

She pets the vase like a kitten, feeling the raised edges of the design with her little hand. After a few long moments Danny pulls her away to set her on his hip like before, earning an annoyed huff in his direction for his efforts.

“Very good, Ellie. I knew you could do it.”

She hides her face in his shoulder and he takes the opportunity to send a look at Alfred. The older man understands immediately and inclines his head before turning to walk further into the house.

“It was nice meeting you,” Danny shoots Damian before following Alfred to what appears to be a parlor a few rooms away.

“I shall fetch some tea.”

Danny shakes his head as he sits.

“No time. I’m in a rush.”

Alfred eyes him up and down before gingerly sitting in the armchair across from him.

“Yes, so I have noticed.”

In other words, spill your guts for abruptly intruding like you have.

“Something…urgent has come up-“

“I assumed as much.”

“-and I know how good you are with kids-“

“Daniel, you cannot expect me to-“

“You owe me,” Danny says firmly. Alfred leans back at the reminder. He knows Danny would never hold that over his head without a good reason. “I have no one else to go to, to look after her. I normally would just take her with me, but I- it’s gotten dangerous. Too dangerous for her.”

He looks to Alfred with desperate eyes. Ellie tries to squirm out of his arms, which reflexively tighten securely around her middle. He can see the dark bags under the younger eyes.

Alfred sighs.

“How long?”

Danny sags and Ellie slips out of her father’s arms as soon as the chance presented itself. Alfred would need to keep a close eye on her in the future.

“A week, two, three tops.”

Alfred sends an unimpressed look and Danny cringes but doesn’t redact his statement.

“Anything I need to know?”

Danny looks down at the hastily packed diaper bag like it had all the answers.

“We’re kind of in the middle of potty training so I threw in some pull ups but those will go quick. She hates carrots. Won’t go to sleep without a bedtime story. Don’t give her any sugar after four or she’ll turn into a monster. Oh, and her powers are coming in so I packed a shield for at night.”

Alfred raises a single eyebrow.

“Could you be more specific?”

Danny waves it off like it was no big deal.

“Just the normal stuff. Invisibility, intangibility, and flight. It’s all very weak and sporadic right now. Keep calm until she figures it out on her own. She’s just learning.”

“So you are leaving a child in my care for an unknown amount of time, a child that can disappear, walk through walls, and fly. Anything else?”

Danny rubs the back of his neck guiltily.

“Why do you always have to make everything sound so…” He sighs heavily, glancing over at Ellie who has managed to take every blanket out of the basket in the corner and crawled in to make a nest out of the materials. He smiles fondly.

“I’ve probably forgotten something, but I know you can handle it. You can take care of her.”

Danny then stands and pulls out a piece of paper, handing it over.

“My number is at the top in case of emergencies. Her favorite stuffy is in the bag, she won’t sleep without it. Her favorite word right now is ‘no’. I wrote down anything I could think of, which you probably can’t even read my chicken scratch…”

Alfred gently takes the paper from his hand and Danny slowly makes his way to the messy corner.

“Hey, Elles,” he says softly, far softer than anything Alfred has heard from him. Usually he was a rambunctious, jovial loudmouth, but right now he was hesitant. Prolonging the farewell they both know needs to happen with how urgent this mysterious problem was.

Ellie looks up for a moment before going back to maneuvering her fort.

“I gotta go away for a while. Alfred here will be watching over you while I’m gone, okay?”

That got her attention. For a child that young, she knew something was wrong, but didn’t know what. And now her dad, her protector, was leaving.

“No.”

Danny folds his lips together, expecting the response but still not ready to go through the hard part of leaving.

“I’m so sorry, baby girl. I am, but I have to go. I’ll be back when I’m finished.”

“No!”

Danny sighs and reaches in to pull her into his arms. She fights him valiantly, but he was stronger and bigger.

“I know. I know. I’m sorry. I’ll be back as soon as I can. I promise.”

They might as well have been empty words for the lack of effect it had on the struggling toddler. Danny sways with her for a few beats until he gets an idea.

“Danielle, look.”

He makes sure she’s watching as he creates a loop of ice, infused with his ectoplasm and therefore, his signature.

“Hold out your hand,” he coax.

She does so with a sniffle and he gently moves the glowing green ghost ice around her wrist to make an indestructible, unmeltable bracelet. He shrinks it until he’s sure it won’t fall off and won’t be too tight either.

“There. Now you have a piece of me wherever you go. Even when we’re far apart.”

She pointedly doesn’t look at him.

“I love you, Ellie. I’ll be back soon.”

He kisses her forehead, breathes in her soft scent, and turns to Alfred. The older man is watching carefully and makes his arms available for a new passenger.

With a deep breath Danny hands her over, Ellie immediately starts whining and tears fall from her eyes.

“Hey, you’ll be okay. Alfred here is a mighty warrior. He’ll keep you safe. I trust him.”

He does his best to wipe away her tears but he has to physically step away when she reaches for him. Instead he looks to Alfred.

Alfred holds her securely and nods in assurance.

“Not to worry. Danielle and I will be too busy to notice your absence.”

Danny smiles at the effort but it doesn’t reach his eyes. He can’t resist petting her head one last time, her pigtails in disarray, and wiping her tears from her cheeks.

“I’ll be back before you know it,” he promises, marking it with another kiss to her head before backing away again. He looks at Alfred sending his gratitude without words. Alfred accepts it with a slight incline of the head. Danny nods once and leaves before he can’t.

The door opens and the young boy from earlier stumbles back with a glare to hide his embarrassment.

“Master Damian-“

Danny holds up a hand to stop Alfred. Of course the boy would eavesdrop, what did either of them expect?

The young father leans down to get eye level with Damian, looking him straight in the eye with seriousness. Damian straightens at the attention.

“It’s very important Ellie is safe and occupied while I’m away. It would mean a lot to me if you would help Alfred do that.”

Damian folds his arms.

“What would I get out of that useless goal?”

“What would you want?”

“Daniel, Master Bruce would not-“

“A knife,” Damian interrupts. “Not just any knife though. It has to be special.”

Danny hums in thought, studying Damian for a moment, almost making the boy squirm.

“Deal.”

He holds out his hand and Damian shakes it after a second of hesitation. Danny nods to the boy, then nods to Alfred, and he’s finally out the door making a portal as he walks from the gentle breeze of outside to the chill of ectoplasm, transforming into his kingly attire as he crosses the threshold.

The GIW had a lot to answer for and he couldn’t hold his subjects back any longer. The United States had declared war against the Infinite Realms and he would be the one to answer.

2K notes · View notes

thethinginthecouch · 3 months

Text

DEATH; A TEMPORARY INCONVENIENCE

Danny didn’t like dying. Not the first time and not the last time.

Danny had some kind of horrific luck when it came to dying in the last few years. He’s been hit by cars (both in a car himself and as a passenger) he’s been electrocuted, caught in a flash flood, trapped in a burning building, caught in a livestock stampede (cows were a lot bigger than he expected and meaner too), hit by trains, and once he had a crane accidentally drop a ton of building debris on his when he was passing by a demolition site.

Thanks to his physiology however, death didn’t tend to stick. Whenever he ‘died’ Danny just took a bit of a nap. He went to somewhere soft and hazy. He wasn’t unconscious, just in a dazed state. Like the entire world would go fuzzy and gray as he relaxed. Eventually his consciousness would return, and he’d sneak away from wherever he was. Smaller rural areas were harder to slip away from than bigger city morgues.

If Danny was one body out of 30 with a medical examiner crew of over 10 people, it’s easy for a John Doe to ‘slip through the cracks’ between arrival and autopsy. Bodies get moved all the time, organ harvesting, bodies donated for scientific inquiry, religious exemptions form autopsy, or just plain cadaver theft.

This was a lot harder when Danny was one of three bodies with only one examiner on staff. People who have less eggs in their basket tend to notice when one goes missing.

Usually Sam, Tucker, Jazz, or Valerie would help him slip away from the morgues by distracting employees, falsifying records, and posing as family member to claim his body.

Once, Danny and Valerie were in Indiana exploring the Fort Harrison State park. Valerie got a brand new camera and demanded that Danny use a portal to take her somewhere to get some nature shots. It was a nice day until Danny was hit by a falling tree after pushing Valerie out of the way. (Stupidly so because she was already jumping away from the falling foliage. All Danny managed to do was jump directly under the tree and to his death)

Three hours later, Danny was sneaking out of a rural Indiana’s hospital morgue when an intern caught him. Danny had crawled out of a body shelf and was halfway done getting redressed when the man walked in. Valerie was busy distracting the main medical examiner to give Danny time to slip away and didn’t notice the intern wandering to the autopsy room.

Danny was standing there embarrassed. Shelf door swinging open behind him with his shoes and coat in one hand, pants and belt unbuckled, and dried blood and leaves still tangled in his hair. The two of them stared at each other without speaking for a long minute before, without breaking his expression, the intern fell back in a dead faint and Danny and Valerie were able to skip town without further incident.

Valeries pictures turned out great. And she said it wouldn’t have been a vacation without Danny doing something stupid. So at least she thought it was funny.

(Well, there was an article about a ‘zombie’ escaping the hospital and the intern quit his job and became a pediatrician, but Danny was sure that had nothing to do with him.)

Now it was time for College! Everyone in his friend group took two years off after high school to deal with the Fenton Portal (finally convincing his parents that opening a rift into another dimension was not the best thing for scientific inquiry) and dealing with the general politics on in the Ghost Zone.

Finally, after two long years of endless meetings, arguments, debates, and discussions. They are free to explore their studies!

Each of them got into great schools too! Valerie was particularly impressive with her multitude of full ride scholarships for her Criminal Justice degree to nearly any college in the country. Danny wasn’t even sure when she had the time to apply for all of them. She chose Columbia University in New York. Tucker told Danny to keep it to himself, but the CIA, FBI, and NSA all had their eyes on Valeries impressive skill set and obvious intelligence.

Tucker was excited to go to Metropolis University for his double major of Software Engineering and Computer Science.

Sam was at Gotham University for Environmental sciences.

Jazz was with Tucker in Metropolis working on her master's degree in psychology.

And Danny was following Sam to Gotham for his own degree in Engineering with a minor in Space studies and Astronomy.

Gotham was a different kind of city compared to Amity Park for sure. Due to the high mortality rate that comes with living in the most cursed city in the world (as opposed to the Most Haunted city in the world), Gotham had no less than 11 public hospitals each with their own morgues as well as the fancy private hospital reserved for the upper of the upper crust of the city and of course the hospital morgue within Arkham Asylum.

Danny and his unfortunate habit of dying and not staying dead found it to be perfect. With the high death rate of the city, corrupt doctors/coroners/ and others, and rampant crime rate. He’d be a single undead tree in a forest of bodies. Danny paused mid-thought. He may have lost the metaphor somewhere, but the basic deal was;

Gotham big+ Lots of bodies = Danny’s dead/undead shenanigans would go unnoticed. Even with Batman and the rest of the flock��crew…clan….

What was a group of bats called again? A quick google search told him it was called a Colony.

So even if the Batman colony got suspicious, there were so many people and bodies the chances of them catching him was almost nothing. It was perfect.

Jazz told him a better solution would be for Danny to just avoid dying in the first place, But Danny was too familiar with his own luck to think that was possible for long.

Danny looked around at his new apartment. While Sam’s parents ensured she got a luxury penthouse apartment 5 minutes from campus. Danny had to find his own apartment. Sam offered him her spare bedroom but Danny declined.

He wanted to strike out on his own. And he wanted to get a room set up for Dani when she visited. His little cousin/daughter/sister/clone was a free traveling spirit, but Danny made she sure knew that she was always welcomed home with him, and that he’d always have a place ready for her to visit.

Danny was happy with his apartment. A 6th floor walk-up two bedroom. Cheap laminate flooring, rattling appliances, a window with a rickety fire escape that squeaked in the wind. It wasn’t the best living situation in the world. But it was a 40-minute walk from Gotham University and was in his budget. (There was another closer building with cheaper rent, but Tucker looked into the landlord and found connections with a trafficking ring, so it was vetoed)

Danny pulled open a portal to his lair in the zone and began shuffling his moving boxes and furniture through. Who needed a moving crew?

By the end of the day, Danny was pretty happy with his progress. He got his couch, bed, desk, dresser, and TV stand all assembled and arranged. He’d finish up Dani’s room furniture tomorrow.

His stomach growling alerted Danny that he had missed lunch and a look at the clock told him he could still manage to snag a late dinner if he picked something up now.

Another google search told him that most takeaway restaurants nearby stopped delivering at 9:30pm for ‘Delivery employee safety’ which was fair. Another glance at the clock told him it was 11:45pm way too late for takeaway but a nearby place had a late-night pick-up option. Nice. He was in the mood for some Chinese too.

His order placed, Danny grabbed some of the cash he had found stuffed in in the cushions of the couch earlier and a black coat he’s pretty sure he stole from Vlad to be petty. He couldn’t catch a cold, but people gave him weird looks if he went out in December without a jacket. He slipped the coat on. A little long on him and old fashioned looking, but it’d be fine for a quick food run. With a quick flick of the lock Danny was headed down the apartment stairs.

Gotham was dangerous in the middle of the day but at night if felt particularly eerie. Danny followed the glowing map on his phone to the Chinese restaurant. Luckily for him it was only two blocks away and the girl at the counter had his food ready when he arrived. She was pretty but kept staring at him with a strange expression on her face. Maybe Vlad’s coat was too weird?

Whatever, he could smell the egg rolls and orange chicken in the bag. That’s all Danny cared about now. With a wave Danny bid the restaurant goodbye. He’d definitely be back if the smell of the food was any indication.

On the walk back to his apartment, Danny was so distracted with pulling an egg roll out of the container to munch on that he didn’t notice he wasn’t alone.

Danny was yanked violently into an alley as he passed in-front of the opening. He dropped the egg roll he had in hand.

“Hey!”

“Shut up! Give me your wallet!” The mugger yelled at Danny waving a gun around in his face. His voice was hoarse, a heavy smoker judging by his yellowed teeth. Danny blinked at the man blankly. “I only have cash.”

The man’s face turned red. “You little Fucker! Hand the fucking money over!”

“Okay. Fine just give me a second.” Danny switched his takeout back to his other hand to reach into his pocket for the cash and change left over. The rustle of the plastic bag made the mugger flinch slightly. “Hurry up!” His dark eyes darted wildly around the alley nervously.

“Okay, okay.” Danny usually would have used intangibility or maybe just invisibility to avoid this guy but the last thing he needed was for a rumor about a meta in the neighborhood to circulate. That’s a quick way to have Batman on his tail. It’d be too much trouble for just the $35.75 left in his pocket. And the guy looks like he really needs the money. He might as well cooperate and head home for the night.

As Danny tried to pull his hand out of his pocket, his hand got caught in the excess fabric around his wrist stuck in the pocket. “Oh, wait uh” he tugged his hand loose. The man across the alley looked half a second from losing his cool. His feet shuffled like he was getting ready to run. Danny extended the crumpled bills toward the jittery man.

But when the man extended his own hand to snatch the money a thump from behind startled him.

BANG!

Danny got a glimpse of Batman’s shadowy face before a flare of excruciating pain erupted from his neck. “Ughk!” Instinctively, Danny dropped his bag to grab at his neck. He felt the food spill over his shoes. Dang it. He was looking forward to that. Hot blood sprayed through his fingers. Gross.

Danny would have sighed if he could have. His first day in Gotham and he ends up dying. Jazz is not gonna let him live this down.

The mugger who shot him looked horrified. “It-I thought it was unloaded!” He yelled before running out of the alley, the money he grabbed Danny for falling and fluttering around the alley in his haste to escape.

Batman caught Danny as his legs gave out beneath him. Danny felt the head rush that came with blood loss. Weird. He expected there to be more pain when it came to getting shot. Maybe he was in shock already? Gloved hands covered his own and pressed onto the bullet wound. Danny knew it was pointless. He lost too much blood already and judging by the spurting the bullet hit an artery.

Lightheaded, Danny slipped his hand out from under the heavy glove on his neck to grip at Batman’s wrist. Poor guy looked distressed even through the mask. “Hold on. The Ambulance is coming.”

“S’okay. It’s okay. Not…fault.” Danny tried to tell the hero that it was an accident. The mugger didn’t mean to shoot him. The blood filling his mouth made his words gurgled.

“Don’t try to speak. Help is coming.” Batman had white lenses covering his eyes. But Danny heard the emotion under his gravelly voice. The man was trying not to cry. The least Danny could do was comfort the poor man. His grip on Batman’s wrist tightened. He used his quickly numbing fingers to pat his hand comfortingly.

“Acciden…S’okay. S’okay.” Black spots filled his vision. The haze of death that he was familiar with began to creep in. Pulling air to his lungs was getting harder. His grip on Batman loosened and fell slack. Batman caught Danny’s limp fingers. One hand still on his neck, the other holding Danny’s hand.

“I’m…I’m sorry.” Batman said. Danny could faintly hear ambulance sirens. Too far away to help.

“S’okay…” with the last slurred word Danny fell back into that dark, fuzzy, place of sleep while his corpse stayed in that Alley cradled by Gothams Darkest Knight.

Batman sat in the Alley cradling the young man in his arms. Early to mid twenties. Male or at least male presenting. Black hair. Before they closed, he saw blue eyes. Thin. Athletic. He had his whole life ahead of him. And now because of a mugger and Batman’s inattention, he was dead.

Batman looked up as two paramedics entered the alley. “Mugging. Gunshot woods to the neck. Nonresponsive.” He backed away as they kneeled in the spilled Chinese food to check the man. “No pulse.” The female EMT said. The male had his hand on the victim's neck. In the same position Batman’s was in a moment ago. “No vital response. He’s gone.”

“Let’s call homicide.” The female sighed. “I’m guessing the mugger got away?” She looked back up at Batman.

Only to be met with an empty alley. Batman gone.

“Not for long.” The male EMT answered his partner’s question with a quip before reaching for his radio to call the DOA in.

546 notes · View notes