thetopsposting

[thetopsposting]

What's all these rumors I'm hearing of this dumb-looking guy in a checkered suit smoochin' the courier? thought Mister House said no kissing the mailmen

The suit is very stylish! Wouldn’t expect wastlanders to understand fashion. And I am not trying to kiss that crazy fink I think they’ll bite my head off

[thetopsposting]

HOW DO YOU FORGET THE AMOUNT OF INNOCENT MAILMEN YOU’VE SHOT AND BURIED?

It happens more than you would think, baby. You gotta crack a few eggs to make an omelette, ya dig?

[thetopsposting]

Sorry I had some, well, business to attend to. Apparently no one in this god damn casino knows how to keep a vengeful courier out.

[thetopsposting]

How many couriers have you wronged for them to all come and find you?

From,

definitely not @a-fellow-courier

I think just the two? Whose to say at this point

[thetopsposting]

IMPORTANT NOTICE to all Tops staff

If you see any couriers, especially ones who look like they’ve been shot in the head do not let them into The Tops.

[thetopsposting]

i lost half my money at this stupid casino i swear im blowing this place up 😡

The house always wins baby, guess lady luck is just not on your side. Good thing explosives aren’t allowed in the casino or else we might have a problem

[thetopsposting]

BENNY NEW VEGAS ONCE I GET BACK FROM DOING THE THING IM DOING RIGHT NOW IM COMING AFTER YOU. I WILL NOT STOP. IF YOU DONT GIVE ME THE CHIP THING MR HOUSE IS GONNA KICK ME OUT.

- @mojave-express2287

What in the god damn….

[thetopsposting]

how many caps would I have to pay to be allowed to make Benny wear a leash and walk him like a dog 🐕 🤔 ?

Sorry baby I ain’t for sale and I sure all hell ain’t barking

[thetopsposting]

First of all, rude. The courier is one of my colleagues.

Second, you haven't paid me back for that package you bought from me 2 months ago.

-@a-fellow-courier

Oh god, right, there’s more of you. It’s nothing but business, baby, and ain’t paying you for faulty items.

[thetopsposting]

hey so i actually have a complaint about one of your hotel rooms. when i visited last week i kept hearing this awful scratching coming from the walls (really ruined the night with my mistress) and when i eventually peaked into one of the many holes in your guys’ walls there was a fucking radroach infestation. i tried to talk to the guys at the front desk and they just shooed me off???? godawful customer service and even worse beds. im staying at Gomorrah from here on out….awful, 0/10

I’m sure if Swank thought it was fine, it’s fine. There is NO radroach problem at the tops, I assure you. This is baseless Omertàs propaganda, they are always up to something.

[thetopsposting]

to Benny and Swank: out of the two of you who is the better looking?

Well I may be biased towards myself, I am the face of the chairmen after all, baby

[thetopsposting]

What's this "hunk of metal" you speak of? 🧐

Oh it’s nothing really, just a robot I thought I could put to good use. Real cheery fellow, agreeable. Almost gives me the shivers with that smile always plastered on its screen though.

[thetopsposting]

I’m not sure if it was a good idea to let the hunk of metal start this show but here we are.

There is NO need for concern about any possibility rouge couriers. The Tops has top notch security and ready to give you the night of lifetime, baby!

- Head of The Chairman, Benny

[thetopsposting]

omg it’s the Tops! how’s Swank doing? (I totally don’t have a crush on him 🙄, just asking for a friend 🫣)

He’s been doing just fine, baby. Keeping things running nice and smooth. Nothing wrong with having a thing for one of the chairmen, doll, it’s understandable.

[thetopsposting]

If you see a courier with a gun shot wound to the head please let us know! They are likely highly dangerous and should be dealt with accordingly.

[thetopsposting]

Hi there!

I’ve been put in control of the The Tops social media! Now is your chance to ask any burning questions and stay up to date about the best casino on the strip.