theultimatespiderfan

[theultimatespiderfan]

"If I looked in a mirror and saw your reflection... first of all I would be like 'holy shit Freaky Friday! Finally!' but then I would be like that's one awesome lady and I'm lucky to be her."

"That is not at all convincing. You just said a crunchwrap tastes like depression. First of all, I'm taking a bite of this crunchwrap NOT BECAUSE I'M JEALOUS AND I WANT ONE but to make sure it tastes ok, and then we're going to Skyzone. I'm gonna win you a stuffed toy and you're going to drown in a foam pit of fun as God intended."

'I can't really change that and stay myself'

Well, that probably explained a heck of a lot when it came to why she seemed to feel this way. But in her typical Jones fashion, she refused to actually think about that for longer than ten seconds.

"You are pretty great. A solid 9.8 out of 10, if I do say so myself. And I'll be fine. I mean, the Crunchwrap tastes kind of like depression now and I'm overthinking every Taco Bell order I've had in the past month, but I'm starting to think that's just a normal Tuesday thing now. I'm fine. I'll be fine."

[theultimatespiderfan]

"Oh please. The Taco Bell gong was my ring tone for like four years."

This was a worrying direction for this conversation to go. Can we go back to sour cream?

"I mean... There are certainly things I don't like about myself, most of them being how other people see me, but I can't really change that and stay myself and myself is the only person I know how to be so... Yeah, I think I do. I'm happy. I have a job I love, the coolest best friend in the world, a family that loves me. And I got all that by being me. I think I'm doing pretty great."

Yet, his eyes remained worried. This wasn't about him.

"You ok, Jenny-bean?"

"Feeling mildly called out here due to the numerous Taco Bell runs I've had in my life already."

"This is going to sound really stupid, but do you...love yourself? Like you wake up and go 'man, I love Gordon?'"

[theultimatespiderfan]

"Jen, the amount of times I've dried my own tears with a tortilla is one of the sadder statistics in my life. No one who goes to Taco Bell has their shit together. If you lie to me again I'm going to require a bite of your crunchwrap as an apology. Now, what's going on? Why is my little sour cream not feeling so supreme, hmm?"

"I'm not sad. I have a Crunchwrap. That's not a sad people food, that's a...handling it...people food."

[theultimatespiderfan]

I hate when someone calls me and i answer and now we’re just on the phone. like okay??? what now???

[theultimatespiderfan]

The Princess Diaries (2001) dir. Garry Marshall

[theultimatespiderfan]

Games: Video Games

People love video games because they do things they obviously can’t do in real life.

[theultimatespiderfan]

notthejanitorjones​:

“You’re my hero, Gordo. Just shoot me a message when you get here and I’ll unlock the door. I had to change the locks and haven’t had the chance to make a new key for people yet.”

“Yeah, I was gonna say, Jenny, I have a key.” 

“Wait, why did you have to change the locks?” 

[theultimatespiderfan]

notthejanitorjones​:

comicbookcoulsonarchive​:

notthejanitorjones​:

“I need you to come over. I’m like twenty seconds away from turning into my father and hosing down the guys setting off fireworks by my place.”

“Wait no…”

“Can I do it?” 

“Not only will I happily allow it, I’ll also share my bag of chips as a reward for your hard work.”

“This might be the best day of my life... I’ll be over in 10!” 

[theultimatespiderfan]

notthejanitorjones​:

“I need you to come over. I’m like twenty seconds away from turning into my father and hosing down the guys setting off fireworks by my place.”

“Wait no...”

“Can I do it?” 

[theultimatespiderfan]

[theultimatespiderfan]

Aabria please it’s too early for me to be crying, I love this

[theultimatespiderfan]

@notthejanitorjones

Girl, we ARE the adventures.

[theultimatespiderfan]

[theultimatespiderfan]

My art style be like: ⬅️⬆️➡️⬇️ .

Portal is one of the first games I really loved so I decided to honor it a bit, hopefully.✨

[theultimatespiderfan]

the crippling fear that you don’t mean as much to others as they do to you

[theultimatespiderfan]

Would you kiss an ancient forest spirit?

○ yes

○ yes

○ super yes

[theultimatespiderfan]

notthejanitorjones​:

“I don’t know for a fact, but I have a feeling it’s frowned upon to buy a bird of prey off a website. Unless it’s a stuffed animal. Then I’m sure it’s fine.”

“Well, it’s decided. We’re getting matching stuffed falcons. Yes/Yes?”