thewiseturtle

[thewiseturtle]

Jun 9 2025

5 10 am

I just learned na 2yrs syang moving on sa ex niya, so where was i in that span of 2 yrs? Ayun, minamahal ka, clingy at super attached sayo habang ikaw, kaya ka pala cold af kasi hindi pala tayo mutual talaga. Now i know, thank you velah

[thewiseturtle]

Jun 7 11 09 pm

HINDI MO NA KAILANGAN PANG MAHIRAPAN SAAKIN. MALAYANG MALAYA KA NA GAWIN LAHAT NANG GUSTO MONG GAWIN, LAHAT NG GUSTO MONG MARAMDAMAN, LAHAT NG GUSTO MONG SABIHIN, LAHAT NG GUSTO MONG MAKUHA GAMIT YUNG PINAGHIRAPAN MO. HINDI MO NA AKO GAGASTUSAN, MALAYA KANG MAGDESISYON PARA SA SARILI MO LANG AT IBANG TAO, HINDI MO NA AKO KAILANGAN PANG ISIPIN. HINDI MO NA AKO KAILANGAN PANG I-LEAD DAHIL LAGI MONG SINASABI NA HINDI AKO NAGIISIP TUWING KASAMA KITA. HINDI KA NA MAGSESELOS, HINDI KA NA MAGAGALIT, HINDI KA NA MANGHIHINGI NG UPDATE, HINDI MO NA ITATANONG KUNG SINONG KASAMA KO O KUNG NASAAN AKO. HINDI KA NA MASASAKTAN NANG DAHIL SAAKIN. wala nang peperwisyo sayo, wala nang pabigat sayo, wala ka nang hihintayin, wala ka nang pagsasabihan, wala nang mang didisappoint sayo, wala na yung libu-libong magbibigay ng chance sayo para maayos mo sarili mo para sa ikabubuti ng sitwasyon ninyo, wala nang kukulit sayo, wala nang magmamakaawa sayo na maintindihan siya, wala nang magmumura sayo, wala nang maghihintay kung kailan ka magbabago. Wala na yung pinangakuan kang bestfriend ka at ayaw kang umalis. Wala na lahat ng yon, wala na.

[thewiseturtle]

Hey Tumblr,

'Yung taong hinihintay hintay ko, nakausap kong muli kanina lang. We did play, and catch up. Ang daming chikas ang daming kwento. Pero, hindi ko na maramdaman yung kagaya ng dati na hinahanap hanap ko siya na para akong nangungulila kasi bigla siyang nawala. Idk what happened but i felt like nadetach ako just like kay Roux. I'm thanking You Lord for this, namamanhid nanaman ako pero alam kong nandirito parin yung lungkot. Pero wala naman akong whats ifs and whys. Maybe this time, its all abt my 5 yrs situationship kaya wala akong maramdaman ngayon dun sa dalawa. Hahahah

[thewiseturtle]

June 5, 1: 55 am.

Nakalimutan ko na feelings ko sayo, Roux hahahahaha hindi ko na maramdaman, natapos na siguro, naubos na siguro yung pag asa ko. It's been 2 weeks since you ghosted me. I guess.

[thewiseturtle]

Chatgpt told me to write what i feel abt you and delete it pero pinost ko dito hahahahaha

June 3, 2025

Hello Luh Roo, i dont know you and we are not close but putangina mo. I know you dont deserve to be cursed at because i have known and witnessed your "kind" nature. To this happy go lucky, always positive and soft spoken guy, i miss you. Hahahaha I know we have only played fcking 12 matches together for 5 freakin' midnights, pero hinahanap hanap parin kita kahit isang linggo na ang nakalilipas. I've been craving to hear your laughs, your "nice try's", your "do you wanna duo?", your English speaking skill but in a Filipino accent hahahaha 😭😭 your Bisaya language, you cheering up on me then laughs when I whiff kasi nakaspectate ka pala sakin palagi kapag patay ka!! aaaaghhhh what did you do to me? What have you done? Bakit ganito ako sobrang naattach sayo, pero bakit ka nawala? Its been a week now pero hindi ka parin nag o-online? Busy ka ba magfocus sa sarili at career na iniiwasan mo na rin ako kasi somewhat naattach ka na? Or hahaha fak hahahahahhahahaha ghosted?! Nahhh, i tot we'll be good as friends and hanggang duon nalang sana yun, hindi mo kelangan mangghost?!?! Pero ok lang din, salamat at ikaw na yung dumisiplina saating dalawa. I know im not yet ready pero i dont have control of my emotions. I am thankful, Lord, thank You, ikaw na po ang gumawa ng paraan para hindi na to maging mas deep pero bakit kapag mas nagtatagal, mas hinahanap ko po soya at mas nagiging deep yung nararamdaman ko? Huhuhu Lord, alam ko pagsubok lang to, sana maintindihan ko na ang sarili ko sa lalong madaling panahon para kapag nangyari to ulit, makakaya ko na. I am so grateful that this happened to me. Thank you for the 1week of duos with you, Le Roux! Til we meet again. Babalitaan kita sa prayers ko kapag platinum na ako ^__^

- your potential sentinel

[thewiseturtle]

I have always been so forgiving but cannot forgive myself.

[thewiseturtle]

Jan 11 2023

I stayed even on your darkest times, when you're mentally unstable. Sinalo ko lahat ng burdens, cold treatment at sakit ng talas ng dila mo. Maybe this was the result, napuno ako, namanhid ako.

Pero bakit nung isa ka sa naging dahilan nang lahat ng hindi ko pagiging ready at pagiging mentally unstable ko, isa ka sa naging harsh, rude, at hard saakin. Pinapamukha mo saaking mentally unstable ako na hindi ko maintindihan yung sarili ko. Bakit?

Akala ko iintindihin mo ako.

[thewiseturtle]

January 4, 2023: 3: 06 am

Happy New Year!

I guess the worst part finally happened, the time i let you go. I can say na this is not the hardest time kasi u made me feel this way multiple time already, but I can also say that this is the hardest time because this has been our last chance. My last chance to give u a lot of chances but your last chance to prove yourself to me.. sadly, hindi ka nakabawi at hindi ko rin nahintay yung pinangako ko sa sarili ko.

Ang sabi ko hihintayin ko kung may pagbabago ka pa ba while you're working. But i guess it's not gonna happen because, I, myself has my own problem that i should face alone.

And I'm sorry, sa lahat ng pagkukulang ko at pagkakamali ko bilang isang partner. Everything's going smooth not until mauungkat lahat ng unresolved issues at yun,, yun ang mga nagpapahirap at nag papaaway satin.

Una palang ayaw ko na talagang mafeel mo na hindi ka worth it. Una palang sinasabi ko na na u deserve eveey good things in this world kasi alam ko yung hirap mo rin e, nakita ko lahat yun, nasaksihan ko lahat yun. It came to mind na i will give u the best i could. Everything crashed nung paulit ulit mo na akong hinahayaan, any month now, magiging cold ka, iiba yung trato mo saakin. I told myself that I dont want to settle w a guy like this, nagiging unsure of his feelings saakin, i felt like natatake advantage ako, i felt like naging option ako, that i started to question my worth again. That's why naging hindi ako ready it's bcos nagng unsure ako sa makakasama ko habambuhay.. it's you.

Hindi lang ikaw yung nasaktan

Hindi lang ikaw yung nanghina

Hindi lang ikaw yung nahirapan

Also, hindi lang ikaw ang sinisisi ko

Sinisisi ko sarili ko for not being ready

For not being able to give you the best i could

For not ano english ng tinupad my promise that i will stay kahit sobrang hirap na

I'm sorry kung nanghina ako at nawalan ako ng gana magpatuloy, i'm sorry for being a bad and weak partner bcos im not ready at all. I cant, hindi ko na kaya e, i tried.

And

I blame myself for continously loving the guy who has no idea sa taong minahal niya.

I'm sorry, I truly am sorry.

Pero hindi ka pwedeng umalis kasi masyado ka nang maraming nalalaman saakin atsaka naano mo na ako. Foul yun no 🔪

[thewiseturtle]

Dec. 6, 2022

I was and will forever be a problem

[thewiseturtle]

Aug. 23, 2022 11:15 pm

Lord, bakit po ba hindi niya ako maintindihan?

Bakit po hindi niya ako kinakausap?

Bakit hinahayaan niya lang po ako?

Lord, bakit po ba niya ako pinapahirapan?

Bakit po ba hindi niya kayang mag sorry?

Bakit hindi man lang po niya ako inaapproach?

Lord bakit lagi nalang akong umiiyak, may sama ng loob at malungkot?

Bakit hindi ko po makuha yung treatment na gusto ko, Lord

Lord sobrang hirap ko po bang mahalin?

Bakit ganitong tao palaging napupunta saakin?

Bakit palagi nalang Ninyo po ako gustong pahirapan?

Am i too much to handle po ba?

Bakit po kailangang palaging ako yung nauunang sumusuko, nauunang makipagbati, nagiging laging mabait

Lord, i deserve better, pleaseeeee

[thewiseturtle]

July 26, 2022

Going back to my tumblr bcos i feel so lonely and i needed someone to talk to. Hindi nanaman tayo okay ngayon and idk why am i evem counting but yes, limang beses mo na ako hinayaan sa 1 and a half yr. You want to be alone, ok i give it to you. But hey, once na naramdaman ko na talaga mapagod dahil paulit ulit nalang to, i dont know anymore :((

But I also want to say sorry, esp bcos of my attitude. I know im worse whenever i am attached. My emotions are too difficult to handle when u're the reason to act like this. I just you all over me :( i want your attention, i want your affection. I am craving for your love, care and time. I get it, it doesnt always have to be me, syempre i would love to resoect your "me" time that's why hindi nalang kita ginugulo but why do we always end up quarellinh w each other, and why am i not even receiving kahit yung pinaka bare minimum wala? Why are you not giving me what i deserve? Why do i always have to beg? Why do i need to compose this message if you're treating me right??

Why do i always have to wait for you? Porket ba nagalaw mo na ako, porket ba nabigay mo na saakin yung singsing, porket ba napakilala na natin isat isa sa family and friends natin mo, kampante ka na??? Bakit ang hirap mong mahalin :(( i just wish na sana maisip mo rin ako.

I just wanna feel loved again. I feel like you don't care for me at all.

[thewiseturtle]

April 20 2022

Hurting

[thewiseturtle]

Too much thoughts in a day.

[thewiseturtle]

I freakin love my Aldrine!!

[thewiseturtle]

if we’re dating and you see me lying down on my bed, you’re 100% allowed to just lay down on top of me

[thewiseturtle]

I luv this qt boi pero short tempered fcker hmp

[thewiseturtle]

Wala naman akong ibang ginawa kundi magmahal pero bakit lagi nalang akong sinasaktan at naiiwang durog at luhaan :((