thinkinglyri

[thinkinglyri]

Hm the first thing I have to say is one pkt of Oreo cookies is very tasty. Way. Too. Easy. To eat. Will chalk it down to birthday eating and uh not do that often.

Im ok today. Bit sore waiting for hubby to get back. Wracking my mind for ways to get a little extra cash in so I can buy my game... whinge below the line

Next is me complaining below the line.

So looking at ff14 to buy it straight away it's in Euro so.. ugh maths. Google.

Looks easy enough. $36Euro... can't be...

Nearly 60au$$ sigh 😕 I mean I knew it wasn't free but... owie. So I'm doing surveys etc... $10Au so far...

I have a few ideas for books.

A self care journal. [ it would be a pdf that you print] qnd of course poetry. I don't know if anyo ever would even be remotely interested.

[thinkinglyri]

In case anyone is having a bad night:

Here is the fudgiest brownie in a mug recipe I’ve found

Here are some fun sites

Here is a master post of Adventure Time episodes and comics

Here is a master post of movies including Disney and Studio Ghibli

Here is a master post of other master posts to TV shows and movies

*tucks you in with fuzzy blanket* *pats your head*

You’ll be okay, friend <3

[thinkinglyri]

In case anyone is having a bad night:

Here is the fudgiest brownie in a mug recipe I’ve found

Here are some fun sites

Here is a master post of Adventure Time episodes and comics

Here is a master post of movies including Disney and Studio Ghibli

Here is a master post of other master posts to TV shows and movies

*tucks you in with fuzzy blanket* *pats your head*

You’ll be okay, friend <3

[thinkinglyri]

all the tips I found for drawing a fantasy map are like :) “here’s a strategy to draw the land masses! here’s how to plot islands!” :) and that’s wonderful and I love them all but ??? how? do y'all decide where to put cities/mountains/forests/towns I have my map and my land but I’m throwing darts to decide where the Main Citadel where the Action Takes Place is

[thinkinglyri]

Summer is a warm one. With COVID still a big deal people are just staying home. Its good for some. Of course others complain. Still others are trying to live and run businesses etc. Just a mess.

Im currently trying to ignore my own rising panic about surgery... covid is just another flick of stress in there. Not looking fwd to any of it. Dont know what to do to stop the fears winning. Im sincerely irrationally scared... my logic self already knows it should be ok. Trying to keep the panic under control tho is... more than i can do.

Im not myself.

I dont know when i will be back.

[thinkinglyri]

21 years ago i met my best friend online in a chat room. Then i married him. Hes a gem and i love him a ton!!

[thinkinglyri]

Should I or Should I not?

I feel like there should be a daisy petal specifically for making hard choices. Do I call or not? Forgive or not? Hurt or not? After so many years as an adult you would think I'd have a better grip on things.

But I've always been good at isolating myself. Away from people. Exactly because of the hurt, exactly because I don't know how to communicate, like I am stuck in a glass walled box and the world can't hear me.

And to be honest on a good day I can sound either self righteous or empty, devoid of feeling altogether. Some (most) days I crave friendship, and someone to talk to. Now before you misunderstand, I am married, I love my husband and he's really a best friend. (This is the point I hate being a girl, because I prefer talking to guys.. and pple get things about it, whatever this is just me being honest, I've lost a lot of friends over the whole gender thing.)

What we have been through in the last few years however, I don't want to throw my extra feelings on him, don't want to make him read this, or feel sorry for me. He has kidney failure, his health has su fed as much as mine has the last few years. I've watched he'd him nearly die once, I don't want to do that again.

I'm tired of being in my own head. So I made this blog hoping that I will at least get out of it now and then. X