Katy, female, 20 years of age. This blog consists of monologues and features the raw and real matters of life from my perspective.
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Real.
Real,
Because what's the point of the illusion.
What's the point of tryin to stick all the pieces into a choking mold with sweet talkin preachers and Revlon make-up.
Cause you are looking for concrete realism but the concrete reality is that the concrete of your mask suffocates the real you inside and underneath all the 'show' walls you're living in.All the fake mansions you've been building.
Don't have a problem with us havin issues.Nah nah it never occurred but I've got a great deal with us trying not to face em, not given em a lil gardening snip.
Come on foreal folks.Now take the tip.
And this is raw, this is real.Wanna mirror Your actions and this ain't how I really feel.Wanna put things together by rippin it apart.Wanna claim I follow Jesus but oh God I've got a lukewarm heart.
I asked You for ya eyes but now I want your ears cause all I'm hearing is real dead deals.
Here I am a dead man walking.Oh God I've seen enough of that.Truly alive and well being people,I'd rather say are corpses just by considering the smell.Our hearts are platonically ill tempered,un submissive,following our own little death carts.People and their disillusionment and fake faces,calling it 'The Art.'
Oh God,take us from the depths.The pit of building illusional walls because we're just too scared to open up.
You know our every next step.Not that it was ever really too much of a epiphany of relevance to us.
Help us Lord to start takin real breaths.
And I know this is a real question.Oh Lord take me as I am but don't leave me where I'm at. For this is as real as it could get.
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Humanity
Oh so you're better than this-
Let me tell you a lil secret,folks.
You,I,she and him-yeah they,we-we're only differing by the skin on our bones.
Nothing different,nothing better,just simply unique because ya you're still you with your own voice,personality,influence and boasts.
But the only thing,even when you've got these that'll REaLlY separate you is your hope.
Question is-do you believe what you believe in because that's how they taught you-is it so?Easy,desolate,shallow and sad?Have you forgott
en what courage means-to think for yourself,ALOUD??
Fact will be if you did believe ya won't treat ya fellas like that.You won't spit in their face,rip their beard and call them names.
You see,we all reach a point where it gets down to me myself and I.And where the love of the self is Not deserted and dry.
We get to a point where Peter and James could never be better than I .You see we're so small minded that we're too blind to recognize the lie.
Peter and James-yeah they were men just like I.But they came to a point where they actually held a happy funeral and let the lonely self die.
Cause you see,to live is Christ,to die is gain.Got nothing to lose,at least,not today.
So go on and get em,murder these murderers and their lies:
People we treat like price tags-and add their worth with the Eye tax
We cheat them,we dice them,We swipe them,we chop.we discard them, we smite them,burn them,slice them to the bare bone.
These humAn beings-
our brothers,our sisters,our caliber,our very own.
We treat them like trash,
Would you like to tell me now there's not something inside of us that know?
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Stewardship
Set the sails,sail the sea-sounds easy huh?
Hey but when you actually take a closer look on the fisherman's occupation,you'll soon realize that the 'EASY'part have gone missing,while you're tieing the knots on the sailing poles and...
The Anchor of course.>>HIGHLY INTENSE FASTENING of this specific knot,so the Anchor will assure your safe anchoring on shore_later...
Sooo...
Stewardship.
The stewards(managers)of their ships should have the necessary ability to master the management of what is initially appointed to them,to test their SKILL, ACCOUNTABILITY,their ENDURANCE OF REPROOF&if the title STEWARD will be added to their initials...
Yes, ladies&gents-this parable is retractable to one and all.
We were gifted with the ocean of everlasting life given by the blood of the Lamb.We were further given the spiritual,intellectual,physical and emotional ability to steward and ship this life...basically based on choices right.
Yes it may require strategy,yes it may require skill but every good fisherman knows the mannerisms of the deep blue waters...
And every good steward has the necessary skill to steward their accounts,to trace problems&to find good solutions.
We therefore choose our own everlasting destination.Whether it is to sink,to synchronize;maybe even compromise or to sail...it's all up to you...And if the boat gets wrecked??ALTERNATE SWIMMING.
And we all sit here.Passively.Wondering and wandering over thoughts about being freshman rather than skilled fishermen.
We wonder what if we are left alone in this big blue...But then we trace back the ropes to the parable and find that in times of extreme loneliness,fear,anxiety,sea sickness&meekness to the cold consorted water_we discover on this boat-the ONE AND ONLY ANCHOR-it's tied to a rope...
Now there's enough rope to hang yourself...
Over stupidity, over untamed meekness,over unshakeable fear &the epiphany of solitude.
...Or>>you can throw down the rope and find the very person every lonely soul should discover at this point~between the hard place and the rock right...Christ is the Rock...hit it and seclude yourself to safety.
Bottom line...
Breed.In your mind,in your soul the mindset of Philippians 4:13...never give up,no matter what is faced,nor approached,deal with it_even if that includes swimming>> with SHARKS-deal with it...all God's asking you tonight is to not stop swimming.
So,dear stewards.Let us sail these ships.
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Time
Time,
What a platonic word
What an infinite limited unrecognizable idea.
It's not your mother.It does not plan to nurture you by nature yet you nurture time as if it was your friend by nature.
They say time waits for no man yet man think that there's still time to wait.
Sometimes it's crawling and most of the time it flies.
And bro I know you gotta hear this again-you gotta get your attitude right.You gotta be ready.Part of the elect.
God's chosen people.You see you gotta live yourself into it.
It takes time form a single DNA string to develop into a complex cell.
Nothing in nature blooms forever so no pressure but don't take for granted the grace you have.
Now is the time to grab and go with it.Cause it don't take no more long time before the King of Glory comes and YEAH YEAH they've said it before.I've heard it before. So WHATEVER! MAN! I still have time!
And boom bang next moment
...King of Glory cracks the sky
And ya realize you were one of em.
Thinking you've heard it before and all over and over and over again.
And now?Now I'm all alone.
And here I'm still sittin.About to cry over worldly losses and earthly things.These things that'll never get me into the Kingdom of the One and only True Hope.
It's passed passages and I have passed a few.God don't take me out of this unless I'm fully into You.
Yeah.They say you are what you eat and God all I'm eating right now is You.Your Word is a barrel overflood with wine and a generous piece of bread.
God I know to the Chinese and the Africans rice and pap does it.
But God I'm here to consume every part of You.No.Rather You consume every part of me.They say if you want something you gotta be hungry.And I guess this is it.
You see dear beholder or rather the elect,God's chosen people you gotta live yourself into this.
The moment you said Jesus be a part of my life,No rather just take all of it,you immediately started to share in The Holy bread.
Now see there.Every part of your being is a result of your spiritual nutrition as you are formed over time into God's perfect silhouette.
Sooo.Back to the basics.Yeah back to the base.J E S U S. Jesus.
In the world of man and God you'll find Jesus.The foundation of human existence and persistence of nature.
As in the study of genetics you'll find Adenine Citocen Timien Guanine.These four basics are the very material from which man is made.
-Just an extra highlight on DNA for you there.
Back to the point.
It takes time to become a new being in Christ not just pure common sense.Just as it takes time for DNA to form.It takes the Holy Spirit to ensure the power of this.It took the unconditional love of a Father to love you more than life itself.To make his only Son a meal so we can forever share Him.
Maybe you don't understand or maybe you do.But either way just know that tonight is a chance to change.To consume another type of Bread.And brothers sisters.Fellow people it could be the last chance we'll ever have.
And I would,we would really like to thank you God for your day to day plan.
I just wanna be like you.Walk like talk like even think like You.
So dear God take me as I am.But don't leave me where I'm at.
They say time waits for no man and so it's only a matter of time which we have.
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Windblown...🍁
Staying in those lines ain't gon be what keeps you breathin honey.Oxygen lies over the barriers of your comfort zone.Breathe
Feel that?This is what it feels like to be free bro.👌
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‘Faucaria Tigrina’.
Rest in piece my lovely, you lived a good life.
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Keep your honor.
-Katy
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💧
Empty
🔊🔉🔈🔇did you hear that sound.
What?...what sound?
Ya wide awake while the world is still sleeping. Too afraid the emptiness would show up too while ya dreamin
🔅the sunshine yeah and the🌛 moonlight-both burn ya skin
🔐you lock away every little secret💡afraid someone will get the idea that your actually internally a ghost- town👻 with little blinding lights.
⏰Time is ticking its toll and every precious second is runnin out⌛⏳
📻📺ya turn on the radio and the television and catch the satellite📡🔪the emptiness of the hopeless world cuts sharp like a knife.🌍
You look at all the pieces and somehow still feel broke.
You look at all the dynamite and wait for the bomb to blow.💣
Ya smoke,ya sip,ya huff and ya drip but somehow ya still empty like it was just puttin ya on half the trip🚬💉
Ya money can't help ya💸ya flush down the drain🚽
Ya take all ya empty files filled with a lot of junk,and archive it into the longterm-memory part of ya brain📥📦hopin that it'll be good enough to post to ya offspring like an antique piece of furniture.
✒but God,man- He have seen all of this,His writin something awesome of sweet and pure bliss.
✂ya feel like the ceiling has cut you off,many moons ago.🎶🔬🔭
⚽Ya think He never came to look for you just as daddy always tried so hard not to make it to ya soccer games.
And man you was so sure he'd proud of ya if he saw ya incredible skill⚽man ya were the captain of the game but nah nah man, he just never came.⚽
☕you think God's not watchin ya when you're awake drinking coffee on an early mornin for the renewal of long lost energy🎣while thinkin of all the left work🏄cause He don't really care where ya bicycle goes and where ya boat have surfed.🚵
🌍you have travelled the world and searched it all out in your mind.💭🏁your still looking forward to that filling pizza and cold bitter wine.⛳🍕🍹
ya still not happy so you buy yaself a ice cream🍧🏤sittin in church,makin it ya dream,while yappin off the preacher,man cause ya know this old over exaggerated hymn
But tonight,tonight I'm tellin ya,He have seen your empty burden.His eyes,they travel the earth and they never lingering to see ya,upon the mountain and you down down lying on ya face.
⛺sleepin in ya camp-out tent cause yo mama said it'll cost ya less rent.
🏰He don't care about ya status,your ability to fly a rocket ship.🚀He don't care about ya ups and downs like a rollercoaster trip.🎢
⚓He is an anchor to ya soul and a fountain full of LIFE.
His grace is sufficient to flood your empty life.
♨His love is enough even when you seein red lights🚨.
His a good good Father and He will in danger always always fight.⚠
🚩Here-You have reached it.
Now,rest in peace(RIP)✌-All the empty memories of a once empty place. 📍
🎭You don't have to fake it no more. You got a real face.👍😌
God don't take back the gifts He have given and He'll never forget you.
Your chosen,a priesthood,a king and a queen. 👑
You are very alive.
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Gasteria Batesiana “Barberton” sits small in his 10cm pot, but he was quite cheap and just had to come home with me. I love his sandpaper-like leaves. And plus, the texture looks great on a photo.
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'Today we live, today we breathe, today we know that we are strong when we are weak'
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In a world full of camouflaged soldiers,be a bright soul
Katy
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