They/he/faeA side blog for @touchstarvedtarotcards where I post random things and my experiences with ts/tics(Maybe other issues I got going on too)
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I get this regularly, unfortunately :( especially when I’m low on sleep or extremely stressed and close to physical burnout
Does anyone else with Tourette's get massive random surges of premonitory urge that no matter what you tic it won't calm down? It feels like there's flaming electric ants crawling around in my veins all around my body. It's so incredibly horrible and painful. But it isn't like any other type of pain, it's a unique kind of pain specific to this. I hate it so very much.
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I've been disabled for almost 29 years. Here's what I've learned.
Tablets sink and capsules float. Separate out your tablets and capsules when you go to take them. Tip your head down when taking capsules and up when taking tablets. Liquigels don't matter, they kinda stay in the middle of whatever liquid is in your mouth.
If your pill tastes bad, coat it with a bit of butter or margarine. I learned this from my mom, who learned it from a pharmacist.
Being in pain every day isn't normal. Average people experience pain during exceptional moments, like when they stub their toe or jam their finger in a door, not when they sit cross-legged.
Make a medical binder. Make multiple medical binders. I have a small one that comes with me to appointments and two big ones that stay at home, one with old stuff and one with more recent stuff.
Find your icons. Some of mine include Daya Betty (drag queen with diabetes), Stef Sanjati (influencer with Waardenburg syndrome and ADHD), and Hank Green (guy with ulcerative colitis who... does a bunch of stuff). They don't have to be disabled in the same way as you. They don't even have to be real people. Put their pictures up somewhere if you want; I've been meaning to decorate my medical binders with pictures of my icons.
Take a bin, box, bag, basket, whatever and fill it with items to cope with. This can be stuff for mentally coping like colouring books or play clay or stuff for physically coping like pain medicine or physio tape.
Decorate your shit! My cane for at home has a plushie backpack clip hanging from the end of the handle and my cane for going places is covered in stickers. All of my medical binders have fun scrapbooking paper on the outside. Sometimes, I put stickers and washi tape on my inhalers and pill bottles. I used my Cricut to decorate my coping bin with quotes from my icons, like "I've seen enough of Ba Sing Se" and "I need you to be angrier with that bell".
If a flare-up is making you unable to eat or keep food down, consider going to the ER. A pharmacist once told me that since my eye flares can make me so nauseous that I cannot eat, then I need to go to the hospital when that happens.
Cola works wonders for nausea. I have mini cans of Diet Pepsi in my coping bin.
Shortbread is one of the only things I can eat when nauseous. Giant Tiger sells individually-wrapped servings of shortbread around Christmas or the British import store sells them year-round. I also keep these in my coping bin.
Unless it violates a pain contract or something, don't be afraid to go behind your doctor's back to get something they are refusing you. I got my cardiologist referral by getting in with a different NP at my primary care clinic than who I usually saw. I switched from Seroquel to Abilify by visiting a walk-in.
If you have a condition affecting your abdomen in some way (GI issues, reproductive problems, y'know) then invest in track pants that are too big. I bought some for my laparoscopy over a year ago and they've been handy for pelvic pain days, too. I've also heard loose pants are good for after colonoscopies.
Do whatever works, even if it's weird. I've sat on the floor of the Eaton Centre to take my pills. I've shoved heating pads down my front waistband to reach my uterus.
High-top Converse are good for weak ankles. I almost exclusively wear them.
You can reuse your pill bottles for stuff. I use my jumbo ones to store makeup sponges and my long skinny ones to hold a travel-size amount of Q-Tips.
Just because your diagnostics come back with nothing, it doesn't mean nothing is wrong. Maybe you were checking the wrong thing, or the diagnostic tool wasn't sensitive enough. I have bradycardia episodes even though multiple cardiac tests caught nothing. I probably have endometriosis even though my gynecologist didn't see anything.
You can bring your comfort item to appointments, and it's generally a green flag when someone talks to you about it. I brought a Squishmallow turkey (named Ulana) to my laparoscopy and they had her wearing my mask when I woke up. I brought a Build-A-Bear cat (named Blinx) to another procedure and a nurse told me that everyone in the hall on the way to the procedure room saw him and were talking about how cute he was. Both of those ended up being positive experiences and every person who talked to me about my plushies was nice to me. If you don't feel comfortable having it visible to your provider during the appointment, you can hide it in your bag and just know it's there, or if you're in a video appointment, you can hold it below frame in your lap.
Get a small bucket, fill it with stuff, and stick it in your bed (if you have room for it). I filled a bucket with Ensure, juice boxes, oatmeal bars, lotion, my rescue inhaler, etc. in October 2023 in anticipation of my laparoscopy and I still have it in my bed as of January 2025.
If your disability impacts your impulse control (e.g. ADHD, bipolar disorder), you should consider setting limits around your spending -- no more than X dollars at a time, nothing online unless it's absolutely necessary, and so on. Or, run these purchases by someone you trust before committing to them; I use my BFF groupchat to help talk sense into myself when I buy stuff.
Feel free to add on what you've learned about disability!
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I've been disabled for almost 29 years. Here's what I've learned.
Tablets sink and capsules float. Separate out your tablets and capsules when you go to take them. Tip your head down when taking capsules and up when taking tablets. Liquigels don't matter, they kinda stay in the middle of whatever liquid is in your mouth.
If your pill tastes bad, coat it with a bit of butter or margarine. I learned this from my mom, who learned it from a pharmacist.
Being in pain every day isn't normal. Average people experience pain during exceptional moments, like when they stub their toe or jam their finger in a door, not when they sit cross-legged.
Make a medical binder. Make multiple medical binders. I have a small one that comes with me to appointments and two big ones that stay at home, one with old stuff and one with more recent stuff.
Find your icons. Some of mine include Daya Betty (drag queen with diabetes), Stef Sanjati (influencer with Waardenburg syndrome and ADHD), and Hank Green (guy with ulcerative colitis who... does a bunch of stuff). They don't have to be disabled in the same way as you. They don't even have to be real people. Put their pictures up somewhere if you want; I've been meaning to decorate my medical binders with pictures of my icons.
Take a bin, box, bag, basket, whatever and fill it with items to cope with. This can be stuff for mentally coping like colouring books or play clay or stuff for physically coping like pain medicine or physio tape.
Decorate your shit! My cane for at home has a plushie backpack clip hanging from the end of the handle and my cane for going places is covered in stickers. All of my medical binders have fun scrapbooking paper on the outside. Sometimes, I put stickers and washi tape on my inhalers and pill bottles. I used my Cricut to decorate my coping bin with quotes from my icons, like "I've seen enough of Ba Sing Se" and "I need you to be angrier with that bell".
If a flare-up is making you unable to eat or keep food down, consider going to the ER. A pharmacist once told me that since my eye flares can make me so nauseous that I cannot eat, then I need to go to the hospital when that happens.
Cola works wonders for nausea. I have mini cans of Diet Pepsi in my coping bin.
Shortbread is one of the only things I can eat when nauseous. Giant Tiger sells individually-wrapped servings of shortbread around Christmas or the British import store sells them year-round. I also keep these in my coping bin.
Unless it violates a pain contract or something, don't be afraid to go behind your doctor's back to get something they are refusing you. I got my cardiologist referral by getting in with a different NP at my primary care clinic than who I usually saw. I switched from Seroquel to Abilify by visiting a walk-in.
If you have a condition affecting your abdomen in some way (GI issues, reproductive problems, y'know) then invest in track pants that are too big. I bought some for my laparoscopy over a year ago and they've been handy for pelvic pain days, too. I've also heard loose pants are good for after colonoscopies.
Do whatever works, even if it's weird. I've sat on the floor of the Eaton Centre to take my pills. I've shoved heating pads down my front waistband to reach my uterus.
High-top Converse are good for weak ankles. I almost exclusively wear them.
You can reuse your pill bottles for stuff. I use my jumbo ones to store makeup sponges and my long skinny ones to hold a travel-size amount of Q-Tips.
Just because your diagnostics come back with nothing, it doesn't mean nothing is wrong. Maybe you were checking the wrong thing, or the diagnostic tool wasn't sensitive enough. I have bradycardia episodes even though multiple cardiac tests caught nothing. I probably have endometriosis even though my gynecologist didn't see anything.
You can bring your comfort item to appointments, and it's generally a green flag when someone talks to you about it. I brought a Squishmallow turkey (named Ulana) to my laparoscopy and they had her wearing my mask when I woke up. I brought a Build-A-Bear cat (named Blinx) to another procedure and a nurse told me that everyone in the hall on the way to the procedure room saw him and were talking about how cute he was. Both of those ended up being positive experiences and every person who talked to me about my plushies was nice to me. If you don't feel comfortable having it visible to your provider during the appointment, you can hide it in your bag and just know it's there, or if you're in a video appointment, you can hold it below frame in your lap.
Get a small bucket, fill it with stuff, and stick it in your bed (if you have room for it). I filled a bucket with Ensure, juice boxes, oatmeal bars, lotion, my rescue inhaler, etc. in October 2023 in anticipation of my laparoscopy and I still have it in my bed as of January 2025.
If your disability impacts your impulse control (e.g. ADHD, bipolar disorder), you should consider setting limits around your spending -- no more than X dollars at a time, nothing online unless it's absolutely necessary, and so on. Or, run these purchases by someone you trust before committing to them; I use my BFF groupchat to help talk sense into myself when I buy stuff.
Feel free to add on what you've learned about disability!
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seen a this edible aint shit but for adderall
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me: trying to sleep
my brain: tics? tics. squeeze eyeballs. move shoulder. hum. now.
me: you could do this at literally any point today why now
my brain: because tic :)
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Think I've just about had it with people who ONLY find Tourette's funny.
I'm declaring here and now, yes it absolutely can be funny sometimes.
But I'm also declaring that it is sometimes very NOT funny.
You're just lucky that you haven't seen anything nasty.
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Wishing my fellow tic disorder havers happy and safe chilly seasons. I know some of yall, like myself, can have worse tics triggered by cold or shivers. I hope you can still have a good few months, and I’m sending you love!
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i think the worst thing about tourette's is the unpredictability of it,
i can have a few good months, i can have a few good weeks.
i can have good and bad days.
yet i don't know WHEN it's going to happen, when one day i will not be able to walk correctly, again. when one day i won't be able to stop shouting and talking, when one day i will not be able to even hold a glass of water.
and it's scary knowing that one day i can be great! that i have little to zero tics, and one day, my whole body hurts because of the constant movement, and it hurts to talk because of the constant talking and shouting, to spending my whole days in bed after tic attack, exhausted, crying, exhausted.
that's all, i wish people could take it more seriously.
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Good news everyone I have accidentally discovered the stupidest fucking conceivable way to make myself to do chores
It goes like this…..
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My car: *low gas light on*
Me: I mean, I COULD stop at the gas station on the way home… OR! I could just NOT do that and deal with it tomorrow
Me: but what if I get stuck in a time loop starting tomorrow and every day I wake up and my car is on empty that would be so annoying
Me: uggghhh FINE I will stop at the gas station.
****LATER THIS EVENING:****
My sink: *has all my bowls and tea mugs in it*
Me: okay I don't actually care about this problem for tonight I am not planning on eating soup or tea
Me: …yeah but if i do end up being stuck in a time loop starting tomorrow it is going to SUCK to have only dirty tea cups in the morning forever
Me: uuuuughhhh okay clean sink it is
-
I hate this. My brain must have an extremely low opinion of me to even try it, and it worked.
But hey, I don't have to try to remember to leave 5 min early tomorrow for a gas run?
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Sometimes it feels like everyone around me is speaking in a secret language and I'm the only one who doesn't know it.
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I keep trying to think of posts to make for Tourette’s awareness month, but honestly my tics are in a pretty big waning period so I don’t have a ton to currently share. I suppose I can talk about what waning looks like for me!
So when I’m in a waning period like rn, my tics are almost completely gone. I’ve never counted, but I have only a handful of tics a day. Mostly whistling, blinking, rolling my eyes, popping my lips, and short screams. I do still have the occasional complex tic, but much less often than in a waxing period, and usually there’s a distinct trigger for it.
So there you go! Some info about my tics when I’m in a waning period! Feel free to ask me any questions in the comments, reblogs, or an ask! I’m always willing to share my experiences (but please be respectful if I don’t want to answer some questions). Or share your own experiences if you want! Love to hear from yall!
Happy Tourette’s awareness month!!! <3
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What NOT to say to someone with tics
About a year ago I asked for people with tics/Tourette's to send me things not to say to people with tics. I am so sorry it has taken me so long to post this.
"I'm so sorry" - this could make someone feel bad about being disabled and it feels condescending
"Well you don't look like you have Tourette's" - Tourette's doesn't have a look and not all disabilities are visible
"Just relax" - being relaxed doesn't necessarily make tics go away
"Stop hitting yourself" - don't you think I would if I could.
"Have you tried yoga" - yoga wont magically make someone's tics go away
"But I didn't see you tic" - tics fluctuate so just because you didn't see someone tic doesn't mean they are faking
"You have tics, do you swear?!" - not everyone with tics has coprolalia and its a stereotype that all people with tics swear
"Can you stop that please" - tics are involuntary, someone can't just stop having a tic because you find it annoying
"So you can say whatever you want and not get in trouble" - this is just not true at all, people with Tourette's face a lot of discrimination because they can't control what they say and people think they are faking so they can be rude
"Well if you take medication, why aren't your tics gone?" - medication doesn't make tics go away fully
"Can you tic *insert word/movement here* for me?" - this is just so rude!!
"I wish I had tics" - even if you mean this in a positive way, it is still really disrespectful
There are so many more not on this list as well!
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“You shouldn’t self-ID as ADHD/autistic, you’re turning a very real mental condition into a trend” Ok then stop saying delulu. Stop speculating on which cluster C personality disorder the criminals you hear about on the news have. Stop saying “schizoposting” and “acoustic” and “is it restarted?” Stop using “psycopath” and “sociopath” as catch-all ways of calling someone a bad person. Stop saying “the intrusive thoughts won” when you bleach your hair and then turn your nose up at people who suffer from very real, very scary urges of physical/sexual violence. Stop saying “I’m so OCD” as a way of calling yourself neat. Stop treating BPD/ASPD/Bipolar as inherently abusive. Stop saying “OP I am living in your walls” without tagging for unreality. Stop diagnosing complete strangers you’ve never met on r/AITA with NPD.
You first. If you don’t want our disabilities to be treated like trends then stop belittling and minimising them. I’ll NEVER judge a person for trying find labels for their symptoms when an apathetic, racist, sexist, ableist healthcare system refuses to. But I will absolutely judge a hypocrite. Which a lot of you are
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