ticketforoneplease

[ticketforoneplease]

The Mission

It’s coming.  I can feel it breathing down my neck.  It’s the little things that just keep happening in every day life.  The cashier no longer asking for ID when I buy liquor.  When a kid I used to babysit is graduating college.  It’s coming.  Winter is coming.  No, thirty is coming.  

Age has always been just a number to me.  I’ve never made a big deal about birthdays.  Sure, I’ve made a completely never completed “30 Things to do Before I Turn 30″ list.  Lists.  Multiple lists.  I start and abandon as reality sets in - that working at a non-profit does not mean there are extra funds for that trip to Europe, or that I don’t have the time to devote to learning how to knit in the middle of my busiest season at work.

It’s not like thirty is ~that~ close.  I’ll be 29 in October.  But it’s close enough that I feel the pressure of the perfect life.  My Facebook newsfeed is a list of happy parents, happy engaged friends, happily married friends, friends buying homes, friends going on long vacations to faraway locales.  And I am pretty much doing what I’ve always done.  I’ve been happy living in the rut that I’ve carved out for myself.  I love my nights in and cups of tea and fuzzy socks and good books.  Even so, I feel like maybe I’m missing something.  

And sure, my love life has been short.  Less than perfect.  Far from ideal.  But it’s mine.  And maybe that love life (or lack thereof) is what is inspiring me to finally do it.

I’m going to date myself.  

Really date myself.  Take myself out to those places that I have wanted to go, see those movies I have wanted to see, and eat at those restaurants where I have wanted to eat.  On my own.  It’s time I get to learn who I am and who I want to be.  It’s time I fall in love with myself.  

And maybe I’ll cross off some of those 30X30 projects on the way.