timetravelingkayak - Tumblr blog

[timetravelingkayak]

My brother just posed this question at family dinner

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Pierogi pillows

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marco in a Cassie, Jake, Rachel, Tobias, or ax book: “ha ha Jerry Springer would have a field day with our group we’re so dysfunctional with bird boy and ax-man the alien. all the girls want me like Snackwell Devils Food cookies. I’m not short I’m fun sized, Xena Warrior Princess.”

Marco in a Marco book: “on they came. And I didn’t care. I didn’t care. I wanted battle. I wanted pain. And I wanted to inflict pain. I wasn’t the calm, emotionless shark. I was a boy who’d watched his mother die. Again.”

[timetravelingkayak]

I understand why a lot of fantasy settings with Ambiguously Catholic organised religions go the old "the Church officially forbids magic while practising it in secret in order to monopolise its power" route, but it's almost a shame because the reality of the situation was much funnier.

Like, yes, a lot of Catholic clergy during the Middle Ages did practice magic in secret, but they weren't keeping it secret as some sort of sinister top-down conspiracy to deny magic to the Common People: they were mostly keeping it secret from their own superiors. It wasn't one of those "well, it's okay when we do it" deals: the Church very much did not want its local priests doing wizard shit. We have official records of local priests being disciplined for getting caught doing wizard shit. And the preponderance of evidence is that most of them would take their lumps, promise to stop doing wizard shit, then go right back to doing wizard shit.

It turns out that if you give a bunch of dudes education, literacy, and a lot of time on their hands, some non-zero percentage of them are going to decide to be wizards, no matter how hard you try to stop them from being wizards.

[timetravelingkayak]

Paz e amor na terra, a moral venceu! Você escolheu com ética e o destino te recompensou. 🔵🔵 você e @zapatism seguem em frente sem dinheiro

uhul! obg zapa por não me matar <3

[timetravelingkayak]

Você está numa sala. A sua frente tem uma mesa com um botão azul e um botão vermelho. Em algum outro lugar, uma outra pessoa está numa sala idêntica a essa. Não há maneira de se comunicar entre as salas. Se os dois botões azuis forem apertados, vocês dois vivem. Se os dois botões vermelhos forem apertados, vocês dois morrem. Se um botão azul e um botão vermelho forem apertados, quem apertou o azul morre e quem apertou o vermelho ganha mil reais. Qual botão você aperta?

azul!

[timetravelingkayak]

Debra Spence — Lucky Spoons  (pastel pencils on pastlemat, 2022)

[timetravelingkayak]

Reblog to give the person you reblogged it from the energy to do one (1) chore or maybe many

[timetravelingkayak]

If you have achieved something, please remember to observe a mandatory period of basking in the warm glow of your achievement like a lizard on a stone, lest you teach your brain that effort is futile, actually, because it didn't get to enjoy its happy chemicals, so, naturally, nothing good ever comes of trying. (And no, avoiding punishment is not a reward!)

I recommend, like, 5% of basking time in relation to whatever time you invested into achieving the thing minimum. And if you can't make your own bask, friend-brought is fine (= tell your friends!).

[timetravelingkayak]

Panda twin birth livestream at the restaurant

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How did you first come out?

[timetravelingkayak]

i’m not aromantic but i believe in their beliefs

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my favorite emotion is when someone does something kinda foolish and all you can say is “i love you” in response

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Regarding my last post.

[Talking about the other canditate] "[...]In the last debate you walked across stage to slap me and said you wanted to have done it, you arent even man enough for that"

"Datena [other candidate's name], no"

[CHAIR.]

[mediator of the debate] "our commercials, please"

[timetravelingkayak]

okay, was anybody going to tell me aabria's parents were both marines or was i just supposed to find out that crucially relevant piece of worlds beyond number lore through an old episode of dirty laundry myself?

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Really the kicker about discussing colonialism intrinsic to certain fictional tropes/archetypes/genres/what-have-you is that white bitches et al get SO mad about it. "Ohh so I'm not allowed to play farming sims? Wearing a silly hat makes me a fascist now?" I was just exercising critical thought but yknow what? Just for you? Yeah it does

[timetravelingkayak]

The three real estate agents hover ominously, waiting for the Nightmare* to reveal itself

*The nightmare is the price