tipsy69gnostalgic-blog

[tipsy69gnostalgic-blog]

Harry Potter: I can’t believe Umbridge tried to pull that crap.

Hermione Granger: I can. She’s a horrible monster.

[tipsy69gnostalgic-blog]

Hetalia Heights, According to a Statistic Chart I Found

Australia: 178.4 cm (5' 10.2")

Belgium: 163.3 cm (5' 4.3")

Cameroon: 170.6 cm (5' 7.2")

Canada: 174 cm (5' 8.5")

China (PRC): 164.8 cm (5' 4.9")

China: 169.4 cm (5' 6.7")

Denmark: 180.6 cm (5' 11.1")

Estonia: 179.1 cm (5' 10.5")

Finland: 178.2 cm (5' 10")

France: 174.1 cm (5' 8.5")

Germany: 178.1 cm (5' 10")

Hong Kong: 170 cm (5' 7")

Hungary: 165.84 cm (5' 5.2")

Iceland: 181.7 cm (5' 11.5")

India: 165.3 cm (5' 5")

Italy - Middle & North: 176.9 cm (5' 9.7")

Italy - South: 174.2 cm (5' 8.0")

Japan: 171.2 cm (5' 7.4")

Korea, South: 175.26 cm (5' 9")

Lithuania: 176.3 cm (5' 9.4")

Netherlands: 184.8 cm (6' 0.8")

New Zealand: 177.0 cm (5' 9.7")

Norway: 179.9 cm (5' 10.8")

Portugal: 172.8 cm (5' 8")

Spain: 170 cm (5' 7")

Sweden: 180 cm (5' 10.9")

Switzerland: 175.5 cm (5' 9")

Taiwan: 159.68 cm (5' 2.75")

Thailand: 167.5 cm (5' 5.9")

Turkey: 173.74 cm (5' 8.4")

UK: 176.8 cm (5' 9.6")

USA: 1178.2 cm (5' 10.2")

Vietnam: 156 cm (5' 1'')

[tipsy69gnostalgic-blog]

Sweden: Finland.

Finland: yes?

Sweden: *bends down on one knee* *takes out a small box* will you...

Finland: oh my god.

Sweden: *opens box* assemble this ring with me?

Finland: ...*internal sobbing*

[tipsy69gnostalgic-blog]

Germany, Italy and Japan are eating at a Chinese restaurant.

Italy: Ve, I love fortune cookies. What does yours say, Germany?

Germany: Well, let’s see- *opens fortune* “No man is an island.”

Japan: *Looks into the camera like he’s on The Office*

[tipsy69gnostalgic-blog]

2p!Italy: Anyway, today is the day we reveal to the whole world the existence of the “League of Villainous Evildoers Maniacally United For Frightening Investments in Naughtiness!”

2p!America: You want us to be called L.O.V.E.M.U.F.F.I.N.?

[tipsy69gnostalgic-blog]

TEA

England: What tea would you like?

Scotland: I'll try... Green Tea mixed with Lemon Zinger.

England: Two teabags in one cup? We're not at a rave!

[tipsy69gnostalgic-blog]

Argument In A world Meeting

2p!Italy: I object!

2p!Russia: You're out of order!

2p!Italy: No, you're out of order!

2p!America:*mutters* This meeting is out of order.

2p!Netherlands:*stands up* The soda machine in the hallway is out of order!

[tipsy69gnostalgic-blog]

America: 9:01! Germany is officially late for the first time ever. All right let's do this, who's got theories?

Japan: Uh... his alarm didn't go off.

America: All three alarms? All with battery back up? Come on, who wants to take this seriously?

Russia: Ooh, he was taken in his sleep.

America: That's what I'm talking about. Super dark, Russia, but way more plausible than Japan's idiotic alarm clock theory.

Italy: I bet he tucked himself into bed too tight and got stuck.

Romano: Hmm, maybe he fell into another dimension where he’s interesting?

[Britain sees the group huddled around the door.]

Britain: It's 9:00 AM, why hasn’t the world meeting started?

America: Germany is a few minutes late, and we're all trying to guess why.

Britain: I'd like to play. I'd say he’s... in line at the bank. This is fun.

America: It is fun. But you're all wrong. He clearly slipped through a subway grate and is having terrible sex with a mole man.

[Germany runs into the room.]

America: There he is! Germany! Where have you been? We've been worried sick, do you care to explain yourself?

Germany: I'm just 70 seconds late. It's not a big deal, don't worry about it.

Britain: Germany, you will tell us, and you will tell us now.

Germany: …There was a problem at the bank.

Britain: *claps his hands together* HOT DAMN!

[tipsy69gnostalgic-blog]

Please, please, please draw up a comic about why Lily should hate Snape

[tipsy69gnostalgic-blog]

You realize you’ve misheard your daughter. There’s actually a mobster under her bed.

[tipsy69gnostalgic-blog]

interviewer: so tell me a bit about yourself

me:

[tipsy69gnostalgic-blog]

[tipsy69gnostalgic-blog]

Two happy owlets

[tipsy69gnostalgic-blog]

Pikachu is like Japan’s Mickey Mouse.

[tipsy69gnostalgic-blog]

“we’ll talk when I get back” is the fictional equivalent of saying “I’m about to die with all information relevant to your plotline”

[tipsy69gnostalgic-blog]

The world would be a lot greater if it wasn’t weird to wear capes in public

[tipsy69gnostalgic-blog]

omg