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10. 9. 8. 7. 6. 5. 4. 3. 2. 1.

AAAND WE HAVE LIFTOFF!

HAPPY MOON LANDING DAY!!!

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Dear Lady Archiviste one day I'll draw you properly with all your glorious braids

Alcohol markers and white ink on paper

I tried alcohol markers for the first time and this stuff is HARD. I'd probably be done way faster with watercolor. But also...that skin texture blending is undeniable

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The fact that people don't think friendship is enough to justify characters doing insane acts of love for each other baffles me. Like have you never loved your friend so so much you want to live in their ribcage. Have you never been really weird about a friend. Have you never wanted to bite your friends parents or shove them down a staircase. Have you never wanted to be buried in the same grave as a friend. Have u never. How do u people live like this.

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Chapter 140 is out!

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The raw version of the title page has these two sentences:

“The back that [he's] always wanted to catch up to. The admiration, even now, remains unchanged.”

Just kill me now, why don't you

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This month's chapter reminded me of the first bullet point so here we are

Been thinking about a few things about Wolfsong (apologies for any typo or incoherency, it's 3am and I reallt should be sleeping but alas):

Shapur's grief. The way he loves both Isfan and Arslan as his own, but knowing that without the deaths of the boys' respective parents he likely wouldn't have had the chance to claim them as his (especially Arslan), and while he wishes so hard that Aýnabat and Sâyezân could've survived, he knows that if they'd survived he would very likely have a different relationship with Arslan. In his eyes, getting to raise Arslan, getting to call him son, it's all such a privilege and joy but he was granted that privilege because Arslan's parents died. The same goes for Isfan, though it's slightly different. He mostly feels guilty that he didn't get to do enough for Golnar, and recognizes that Golnar should've had the chance to see Isfan grow up. “such terrible, terrible joy” and “how greedy I've become” are things I can imagine him thinking to himself?

No coherent thoughts except Arslan and Merlaine meeting in Wolfsong. A friendship blossoming. Maybe a brief meeting where they cooperated to save some village, then parted ways because Arslan was kinda on a timeline (smth Team Zahhak did to him?) and Hilmes gotta haul his ass to Gorgan so that Arslan won't die? But Merlaine makes his way to Gorgan later anyways bc Irina's looking for Hilmes... but how would that happen is thr wuestion

Still wondering what Nerlaine will feel about all that

Maybe Gieve and a few others set out to try and find Arslan and Ashaya bc Shapur has to leave for Peshawar (he doesn't wanna go!!!) and Isfan has to stay behind and stand in his brother's stead and Farangis is standing in for grandmama clan chief (they're both worried sick!!!) Dunno

Narsus and Elam run into Delshad (formerly a slave of his household) after Narsus leaves court. He goes to pick up stuff from Daylam and say his goodbyes but he can't stay due to fear of incurring Andragroas' wrath. Before he settles anywhere he and Elam wander a nit and run into Delshad. End up going w her. Find out that Shapur's place is running okay without slavery. I think this will restore some hope in him (wheee in canon he seemed so resigned and exhausted that thr country csnnot be changed and had little hope, which was what made him initially reject Arslan). My question is: what will this newfound hope make him do? Bc I feel like he'll wanna do smth. But what?

On the topic of Narsus I think he kinda libes w the clan, acts as a nomad, bc surely nobody will think of a former shahrdaran living w nomads...

Sadiq's revamped background but I don't have the energy to dump it all rn only that he's no longer a noble

Ashaya and Alfarīd cuddling by a campfire bottom text send tweet

Farangis may or may not have been hit w my Autism Beam?

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A year and two months after the previous entry in this series, here I am with another one, at last!

This time it's Alfarīd. Regretfully I was only able to plan two for her (and her brother, but I haven't drawn him yet) but I tried my best with what I could manage! Her “casual” fit vs her “combat” fit, as I like to call it. Her dress and skirt don't necessarily have to be that color for her combat fit, any of her clothes could go under her armor, but I wanted to try making an alternate color scheme for my girl.

I tried to base her clothing on that of the Baloch people, as I headcanon the Zott to be Baloch like I briefly mentioned here. The headscarf is probably wrong, the reference photo I looked at definitely wasn't that of a Baloch woman, but I liked the look of it, so I'm allowing myself a little bit of creative liberty. I also decided to give her (and her brother as well as the rest of Zott) some armor, like, they're pretty powerful, aren't they? They take mercenary jobs from foreign countries, they attack large, wealthy caravans, so surely they would have the means to arm themselves properly?? Surely???? Good equipment will also make them better at what they do, right?????? It's not that I think the canon designs for her and her clan are bad, it's just that... I don't know. Their designs feel like Generic Fantasy Barbarians™. They could be a little more, y'know? Their design could be more. What's with the short sleeves and bare torsos, everybody? Y'all live in the desert. You wanna get skin cancer? NO. SENSIBLE CLOTHING FOR ALL OF YOU. NOW. (Also bc I've been kinda wondering about the Zott clan's culture, how they came to be, and their potential connection to Badakhshan, all in the context of my AU, and... I dunno, I just wanted to give them More™)

The armor is leather because I think they'd cook alive in metal armor in the desert heat, but then again leather is also known for being terrible to wear in the heat so I... don't know. I think it's still better than them having NO armor at ALL. Like guys. Come on now. Also the leather distinguishes them from the formal warriors and soldiers, visually. That played a part in me choosing this, as well.

If the colors are a bit strange on her, my apologies, but I tried to capture her vibes, but also I really. Kinda hated the shade of pink she was given in the anime. It kinda felt like she was given pink because she was the Girl bandit. Nope, we're giving her something else. The first is a sunny yellow which also to my eyes gave the impression of the sands + the green-blue being kinda like the oasis, as the Zott clan was said to hail from desert regions in the novel:

“The Zott were a bold and daring nomadic people who haunted the deserts and the rocklands, sometimes serving as mercenaries for various nations, sometimes engaging in banditry.”

(Book 2, Chapter Three, part iii)

And uhhhh just think of the pattern dotted on her dresses as cactus flowers or something. Something something blooming in adversity:

The cactus and cactus flower represent endurance, resilience, and strength due to their ability to stand the test of time against harsh conditions in the desert.

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The cactus plant as well as particularly the yellow cactus flower represents heat, security and endurance. The cactus flower is an icon of maternal love due to the fact that it can withstand and also prosper in severe conditions.

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Other meanings for the cactus flower:

- Protection from danger and threats

- Enduring all things, no matter how painful or difficult

- Warmth and care, especially from a mother to a child

These fit her quite well, don't you think? She is, to me, a protective force in her own right (particularly towards Etoile, who she tries to protect both in body and heart because she tries to stop them from rushing into danger for an unworthy king, she stops them from spiralling into a self-blame frenzy by telling them to go find the survivors when Etoile finds Innocentis dead) and I think it feels fitting that she's associated with endurance. We don't know a whole lot about her life, aside from the fact that she was a bandit, she was favored by her father (but he still beat her, the fucking bastard), she had (still has) command and sway over her clan. But I doubt she grew up sheltered. She's already a leader at her age, and that kind of thing doesn't come from someone who wasn't forged into it. Also, being a child of Haltash with all that entailed should qualify her an endurance medal or something. Bastard.

I don't necessarily see her as maternal, nor associate her with motherhood in my mind, BUT it. How do I put it. She'd be really good with kids, I think. Also she mentions babysitting Zott kids and caring for them and that's how she knew how to soothe a fussy baby... so. Sure. There. That counts because I say so. Maybe in the future of the AU she and Ashaya might take in some kid that strayed their way. (Ashaya would need to mature first though because uhhhhh *gestures at their whole thing* y'know.) Or alternatively the couple just ends up every kid's favorite aunt or something. Close enough. I haven't really thought about this one. Maternal or not, though, I do think “warmth and care” are qualities that she possesses in spades.

Those two animals on her dress are gazelles!

In various cultures, the gazelle symbolizes beauty, grace, speed, and agility. It's also associated with feminine beauty, love, and even a connection to the divine in some contexts, particularly in Arabic and Persian literature and ancient Egyptian art. Gazelles can also represent adaptability and perseverance due to their ability to navigate tough terrain.

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The Gazelle is often seen as a symbol of grace, elegance, and agility. They are known for their ability to swiftly navigate through challenges and obstacles in life, emphasizing the importance of adaptability and quick thinking. In many cultures, the Gazelle is also associated with beauty, sensitivity, and intuition.

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Gazelles can represent consciousness, swiftness, elegance, beauty, and liveliness. They are able to maneuver in vertical movements and even meander around while they run to escape their predators.

Alfarīd, as an official (according to me) member of the acrobats club among the cast, is pretty dang agile, wouldn't you think? She dodges Hilmes' strikes in their first encounter. She's the one who responded the quickest to Narsus' alarm during the hunting ground debacle. And while she may not necessarily be the kind of beauty Farangis is, but I do think she is very beautiful. I think of her and only half a heartbeat later I associate her in my mind with beauty. I'm not making sense rn but yeah. Also in the context of the AU she's Ashaya's love interest and... Ashaya finds her very pretty, indeed. The “love” aspect also, I was thinking of their relationship while I was drawing these. And I think she's persevered through a lot. I don't know, I just think gazelles fit her quite well, what do you guys think?

I don't think it's recognizable but I did also put saltwort on her dress embroidery:

Saltwort, a plant that thrives in salty environments, symbolizes endurance, resilience, and survival in harsh conditions.

Sounds about right, yeah?

Gazelles and saltwort can also be found in... fuck, which desert was it. It was one of the ones in Iran. Uhhhh I think it was Dasht-e Naomid? I'm not sure though because I was trying to look around for deserts in Iran and their flora/fauna for symbolism purpose and... couldn't find much, had to scrounge up what I did find, and. So. Here.

I also put little suns on the hems of her yellow dress. I don't have any fancy quotes for this, I just think she's like the sun in many ways.

Not much in terms of symbolism for the second design, just some rambling. I ended up going with that shade of green, as I found the other shades I tried to be too... they were too cool-toned and I thought that wouldn't fit her, so I tried to skew towards a warmer hue here. I do like that aspect of her canon design, so I decided that it could stay. The headscarf stayed the same color to show that what she has on her head for combat is usually just the same as what she tends to wear for her casual fits, just tied up so that it doesn't fly off her head. It also can be any color she likes.

I tried to give her some ✨bling✨ for both designs. I mean, they gotta have some nice shinies from what they took, right? My girl gotta have some neat accessories. She wears some of those to battle too so long as it doesn't get in the way of her armor. I forgot to draw her earrings for the second design, fuck.

As for the designs on the metal bits, one's a star (I do also sometimes think of her as a star so...) and the other's taken from her crest as shown on the Arslan Senki site:

(though the drawing was too small for me to add those little details surrounding the arrows... well, close enough. I don't even know if she'd realistically have an individual crest of her own as she is not nobility or anything, but maybe as the daughter of the chief... or maybe she just likes the look of it. I thought long and hard about what I could put there, what the symbol to represent the Zott could possibly be— the black flag that Arslan gave them only became their banner from that point on, after all, so what came before?— before I just ran out of ideas and decided to go for this instead.)

OH and that's a scorpion on her belt. A symbol that her girlfriend also shares, I talked about it in Ashaya's design sheet here (she was named Ranna back then, don't worry about it).

I also tried to kinda take inspiration from Baloch embroidery for the designs on her clothes as they're known for it:

I think you can spot which aspects I took and such! Thanks for reading this, y'all.

The AU character design sheet saga so far:

Khazān (Kazai, OC) | Shapur | Shapur re-redesigned | Ashaya (Ranna, OC) | Arslan (I called the AU version Areyan back then, a decision I have since reverted) | Isfan | Isfan re-redesigned | Farangis | Gieve | Alfarīd (you are here!)

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In honor of the ArSen fandom being briefly alive tonight... imma reblog some shit of mine. And yes I still have not touched this WIP since I first made this post somebody help me

Merlaine's sheet is giving me so much trouble. The design looks so bad. I sat for like three hours just trying to figure out the rough plan. I feel like I'm losing my skills?

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Arslan Senki Chapter 140

Diving straight in with this one!

Having all of these new panels of Shapur? More than I could ever have hoped for. How could I have predicted that my dead fave would be back on page again so many chapters later? Thank you, Arakawa (even though we had to live with the knowledge of the head jars for months).

The text-based recap of Isfan's backstory coupled with the early moments of their fight is so perfectly jarring; because why would Shapur, who went alone into the mountains to save his half brother, now be trying to kill him?

Isfan's not even fighting back 😭

Like with Zandeh, the emotional shock of seeing someone who you thought was (who should be) dead is hard to overcome, let alone begin to process the fact that someone who loved you is now trying to kill you. But as with Zandeh, I don't think Shapur is actually aiming to land a fatal blow on Isfan (or rather, despite the sorcery that brought him back, that's not what he wants). Instead, we see Isfan taking non-lethal cuts, his horse cut down under him, and him being hit with the butt of Shapur's spear.

The mention of Isfan's mother holding him tightly 😭😭😭

We did backtrack to just before the moment we were shown at the end of Chapter 139, and just as I was hoping, Kubard joined the fray to take on Shapur when Isfan's horse was downed.

A close one for Kubard!

I've always enjoyed how dynamic Arakawa's fight scenes are, and her depiction of the unnatural movements of the undead warriors is top notch stuff.

Panels that make you say 'oh nooooo' 🥲

Kubard protecting Isfan again!

That was a clever shot from Gieve; right under the legs of Kubard's rearing horse, and his accuracy was as excellent as normal... but it wasn't meant to be.

Isfan's visible outrage at Gieve's very reasonable question to Shapur ("Did I not give you the death you asked for? What left you so dissatisfied you had to return?") LMAOOO or maybe it was that he tried to fucking headshot him for the SECOND TIME BUT we do hear from Shapur himself that he does not regret the manner of his death. So perhaps Isfan's feelings about Gieve's act of mercy will change when he has time to reflect on Shapur's words.

The fact that Shapur says the Lusitanians captured and tortured him because he was weak... I think that's key to what's going on with his fight against Isfan. He doesn't want his brother to be weak. He wants to know that Isfan can react fast enough, be strong enough, that the same thing cannot happen to him. Shapur's precious brother, who he saved. Even now, he wants to protect him, to know he's trained him well enough that he can rest.

Shapur brought up the snake king and his sorcerers, like some of the other undead have.

UNEXPECTED BLORBO

NOT ONLY THAT but because Arakawa often likes to redraw panels for flashback moments like this (her dedication is showing) this is actually a new and improved view of Gurgin during that scene.

Behold the original view of this moment in Chapter 109:

Love that various characters meeting like this is allowing them to piece a bit more together. Isfan realises that he saw one of the Zahhak sorcerers that night, which allows him to warn Kubard later than more might be lurking nearby (which turns out to be true).

When asked by Isfan, Shapur's aim is revealed. His motivation is not outright stated but given the parallels to sparring for training and Shapur's reference to his own weakness, I think it's as I said before; he wants to see that Isfan is strong enough, that he's trained him well enough to leave matters to him now. (I could imagine him saying similar lines to the "Today I am the enemy!" stuff to Isfan in training, actually.)

Isfan asking Gieve and Kubard and his soldiers to go to Arslan surprised me, but it makes sense. Just as Shapur asked them not to interfere, so too Isfan seeks to shoulder responsibility and minimise further casualties, sending the others to protect Arslan, their new Shah, instead. Come on Shapur, aren't those the actions of a leader?

I appreciate this moment because I always viewed Shapur as someone who took his responsibility for his men's lives very seriously (and took it badly if ever they died because of his mistakes). Nice to see that solidified in canon.

(And twisted, like with all things related to the undead warriors; for these are soldiers killed by Shapur himself, men who died because Isfan hesitated and they rushed in to protect him. A harsh learning experience and not a sacrifice that Shapur would ever have made in order to teach that lesson.)

The worst training session ever continues.

I really think the dialogue here must feel familiar to Isfan. I imagine he must have faced Shapur in training like this time and time again, his brother's strictness coming from a desire to see him fulfil his potential and not leave himself vulnerable on the battlefield.

And maybe something about Shapur's words (which are not wrong) and that familiarity gets through to Isfan. That moment where he looks up, it's like it's just clicked, and finally he does as Shapur commanded and takes the initiative to attack.

(I noticed during this fight that Isfan's horse has a leg/chest wound but isn't dead; its head is up and its watching so I have hope that it will survive and recover!)

It's at this point that we see that Bid, one of the sorcerers, is watching the fight unfold from a tower and commenting on the combat between the two brothers. Noticed that he also killed at least one person who was sheltering there; a dead body is visible on the floor. Thankfully, Kubard rocks up (having only pretended to go to Arslan) and racks up his first mage kill (or 'black rats' as he calls them).

Love that Gieve and Kubard have been collaborating behind the scenes; Gieve forwarned Kubard of the mages ability to sink into the ground, thus allowing him to finish the job before Bid can escape.

Dialogue that made my eyes widen.

This is personal. Kubard's already cut Bid's torso in half. This final, skull bisecting blow comes from Kubard's own personal disgust.

And that's where we leave matters.

So now we have to wait another month to see how this wraps up. I assume Gieve took the soldiers to Arslan after tipping Kubard off about the sorcerers. Will Kubard follow now, or will he stick around to see the outcome of Isfan's fight with Shapur? Kubard's goodbye to Shapur felt final, like that was the last time he'd speak to him, and Isfan made his own choice to face his brother on his own, so I really can't say.

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Just waiting for the raws to drop.

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This is now my lockscreen.

Without the YouTube thing

Title page for Chapter 140!

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What's even funnier is that Shapur was the one who said “don't forget it later” and yet Shapur is also the one who Fucking Forgor™

Shapur in Chapter 3:

Shapur in Chapter 140:

When you're not the unfinished business (even though you want to be).

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I feel like even in her lyrics for Parallel Hearts you can tell Yuki Kajiura understood Pandora Hearts more than a large portion of the content producing fanbase for Pandora Hearts... Like obviously she extremely cared about it as a project given that she still will occasionally gush about it on Twitter but these lyrics

Show such a genuine understanding of how PH is undoubtedly about love and about how love is good, which is what pretty much anyone who reads it will get... But also the deeper understanding that a love that claims to overwhelm one's own idea of self is one that will ultimately alienate those for whom the love is for... And it is not until one is able to gain a sense of self and a subsequent sense of self love that they are able to genuinely connect with other people...

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It's because being told that my dead baby sister is gone gone and rotting in the ground and there's no form of afterlife and i'll never see her again makes me wanna send atheists to the dead black void they're telling me my dead 16-year-old sister and my puppy are in.

no other religion is telling me that i'll never see her again and i hope anyone who does that gets hit by a crane.

I don't even have a firm religion, I don't think any specific religion is real or right or true, but if you tell me my baby sister's gone, I'm gonna go fucking feral.

I'm gonna see her again, bite my asshole off.

I mean this in the most neutral way possible: This sounds like a you problem.

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I feel like there's more queer people in non-Christian religions that have trauma from homophobia in their community that but are afraid to talk about it because people have to keep up the "Christianity is evil and others are perfect and progressive" schtick.

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We don’t talk enough about how fanfiction writers love to give character large amounts of non-specific paperwork they hate doing

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