tired-trans-apostate - Tumblr blog

[tired-trans-apostate]

𝐒𝐨 𝐠𝐨 𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐥 𝐦𝐞,

𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐚𝐭 𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐭 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐬𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐛𝐞𝐠𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐚 𝐆𝐨𝐝 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐧?

excerpts from a book I’ll never write

[tired-trans-apostate]

forgive me lord for I have imagined a life far more soft and tender than the one you created for me

[tired-trans-apostate]

(to the tune of valjean’s soliloquy) what have i done / sweet jesus what have i done / become a pink pony girl / and now i dance at the club

[tired-trans-apostate]

christian parents be like “my child CAN’T be trans or gay!! i would know”. honey, your child perfected lying by the time they were in middle school, have only fed you carefully curated and select information about themselves to give you the illusion of closeness, they also successfully convinced you they’re a good little christian despite having left the church years ago, and have processed and struggled with their gender and sexuality for longer than you would guess. you probably don’t know their biggest fear, or favorite film, much less the intimate details about their gender or sexuality.

[tired-trans-apostate]

forgive me lord for I have imagined a life far more soft and tender than the one you created for me

[tired-trans-apostate]

I think I'm starting to get to the point where I don't feel like I need to prove the validity of my atheism anymore. I don't feel like I need to read every word of the Bible to "make sure I'm not missing something" or have a million responses ready to go if I get into it with a Christian engaging in apologetics. I don't feel like I need to know every detail of what led to God's abusive behaviors. I don't feel like I need to hear him or any Christians out. I'm starting to feel like I can just be an atheist and don't need a reason other than "I don't believe in God".

[tired-trans-apostate]

If your feminism doesn't include Iranian and Afghan women, then you're not a feminist.

If your feminism doesn't include women suffering in highly patriarchial societies, then you're not a feminist.

If your feminism doesn't include honour killing victims, then you're not a feminist.

If your feminism doesn't include women suffering at the hands of a zealot religious ideology, then you're not a feminist.

If you support women who want to wear the hijab, but don't support women who don't want to wear it, then you're a morally corrupted person.

[tired-trans-apostate]

every year someone on this hellsite invents a new way to dehumanize and trivialize people who do not believe in religion or supernatural things and then it gets hundreds of notes its sooo amazing lmao

[tired-trans-apostate]

still thinking about "decolonising" missionary work.

the way you decolonise missionary work is by not doing missionary work

the way you decolonise missionaries is like this:

[tired-trans-apostate]

I am made of fire and you want to submerge me in water and call it a baptism and not a murder

[tired-trans-apostate]

[tired-trans-apostate]

christianity isn’t real dude they made it up for supernatural

[tired-trans-apostate]

Truly love the number of people I've met that have been like "Well I went to a Catholic school as a kid, which is to say I'm not Catholic" like damn Catholic schools really out here doing the exact opposite of missionary work.

[tired-trans-apostate]

Fine, I'm not going to push it if you don't have any good reasons to believe something. But you shouldn't be surprised that I'm going to reject your assertion without any good evidence to support it.

I have a book that says there's a great cosmic turtle out there, which carries four elephants (there used to be five of them) on its back who support on their shoulders a giant flat world full of magic. It's true because I have a book that says it's true. This reasoning is exactly as sound as "god is real because the bible says so."

"You can only claim skepticism so far," is one of the sillier things I've seen lately. Your thought-stopping ideology tells you that skepticism is wrong and bad, to just have faith that something is true despite a lack of any good evidence. It stops you from questioning why you reject other (equally poorly supported) books that say other gods are real, and encourages you to engage in special pleading for your particular version of god on top of the circular reasoning demonstrated above.

I'm not arguing for argument's sake; you made a truth claim and I asked for evidence. If any god is real I'd like to know, but you decided either that I'm not worthy of the truth that you possess, or that exposing yourself to the possibility you might be wrong is too dear a cost to pay for attempting to save me from damnation.

I argue to bring myself closer to any truth that I might have access to. I argue because I think people should have the self respect to examine their beliefs, and to reject any belief that can't be demonstrated to be true. I don't want to believe a lie, no matter how comforting it might be.

[tired-trans-apostate]

being angry at god and not believing he exists aren't mutually exclusive. be angry if you need to be.

[tired-trans-apostate]

i cannot explain how inextricably angry it makes me when ppl try to convert me, get me to go to their church, bible group, etc. what makes me even more mad is that i have to refuse to show any of that anger, and be super nonchalant about saying no, im not going, i did my time. bc ik this kind of evangelizing is just the churchs way to convince ppl that nonmembers are evil, since i dont wanna hear about their weird book club all the time and may (unintentionally) snap at them. like i have to try super duper hard to be extra nice to them, bc ik first hand the kind of psychological damage that comes from it. its tiring. especially living in a super religious area, it happens quite frequently. but i dont want to hurt them more, or reinforce what the chuch has said at all. and ik usually it comes from a place of fear rather than superiority. alot of times its bc were friends/classmates and they think im neat and dont want me to suffer in hell. but it still makes me mad.

[tired-trans-apostate]

This is such a good, succinct way of describing the illusion of choice many fundamentalist women and men have when it comes to life paths.