toby-35

[toby-35]

That's still his twink decades later

[toby-35]

i love when my brain says “you’re not allowed to continue writing until you fix that one tiny scene in chapter 4” and then refuses to let me fix the scene in chapter 4. like okay gatekeeper. rot

[toby-35]

i love writing queer couples because they’re always like “i hate you” and then proceed to risk their lives to protect each other, patch each other up in dimly lit bathrooms, and have emotionally significant conversations while facing away from each other

[toby-35]

[toby-35]

More fun stuff

[toby-35]

me: i think the main character deserves peace

also me: drags him through 300 pages of unrelenting pain and betrayal

the doctor at my intervention: “have you considered therapy instead of metafictional punishment”

[toby-35]

writing is 5% typing and 95% lying on the floor whispering “why would they do that” like a conspiracy theorist with red yarn

[toby-35]

wrote 14,000 words in one day and forgot to eat, pee, or blink. it wasn’t writing. it was possession. a demon took the wheel and made it gay

[toby-35]

getting back into writing is like digging up a time capsule and realizing past-you was a little freak but also kinda brilliant.

[toby-35]

outline story → ignore outline → write emotional mess → try to fix it → make new outline → ignore it again

[toby-35]

i don’t need therapy i need a blank google doc and someone to beg me to keep going

[toby-35]

made one minor change and now the whole plot is on fire. ah well. game's the game.

[toby-35]

no one talks about how much of writing is just whispering “does this make sense” to the void

[toby-35]

sometimes writing isn’t about talent. sometimes it’s about sitting in your chair and suffering for 45 minutes until a single sentence crawls out of your skull

[toby-35]

"why do you write?" because it’s the only way to silence the characters pacing around my brain like victorian ghosts with unresolved issues that prevent them from moving on.

[toby-35]

[toby-35]

God forbid i have a crush on a straight male character and no one even writes them in !male readers.