tofuguy2 - Tumblr blog

[tofuguy2]

[tofuguy2]

Lol

You’re ace and don’t like sexual intimacy?

You’re ace and you enjoy sex?

You’re ace and you don’t really have a strong opinion on having sex?

You’re ace and your feelings about sex fluctuate?

Your feelings are fucking valid and I love you !! 💜💜💜💜

[tofuguy2]

Just thought I'd post one pic of myself on here.

[tofuguy2]

Trauma

If your asexual identity formed because of past trauma, you are still valid. You don’t have to defend yourself, you don’t have to mention it to people who ask why you’re asexual, you don’t need to think “im not really ace”. No matter your reason for your asexuality, it is wonderful and valid. And if, in the future, you decide you aren’t asexual after all, that’s cool too. You weren’t “lying”, you aren’t a “traitor”. People change all the time, it’s a long journey to discover yourself.

[tofuguy2]

My thoughts never shut up even in gym

[tofuguy2]

I say this a lot I wish more people would live by this

“When someone does something wrong, don’t forget all the things they did right.”

— Unknown

[tofuguy2]

Cursed love

You know I've only been in love twice and I've only been in two relationships and one developing.

But what all 3 of these people had in common is they all tried 2 kill them selves. I dont know why,or what I could have done but after the fact I always tried to care nurture and help them feel better but to no luck.

One ended up stabbing me,the other ended up abusing our daughter and the third just ended up disappearing and blocking me on social media when I tried to reach out to them.

The first partner was just my first attempt at a relationship nothing serious so I wont do to mich about them they were on a hold and tried to slash her wrist a few times.

The first time I fell in love was with my ex fiance the love of my life and mother of my child. She already had one attempt i was unaware of before us and the 2nd one was right as we were starting to get together she was overwhelmed and swallowed a bottle of pills we pushed through it and were together for a few months shy of 4 years occasionally would tell me she wanted to die but I would just help her. Until one day she finally snapped wich lead to event of one of her familey members abusing our daughter so I took custody of her she seems fine we are not together but occasionally tells me she feels like her life is over.

Now the 3rd was somone I did fall in love with which i didnt think I could love again they were young, beautiful, fun had alot of interest I did one in particular was a love for opera we fell in love with eachother wich suprise them also cause they felt they couldnt be in love again either. But as great as it was they also swallowed a bottle of pills they sent me a image of them at hospital as did my first love I was reliving my 2014 again in 2019 I tried to push on with this one aswell I continued to send messages,happy pictures news about things to them while they were in hospital but then I found out they were released I was so happy but they never returned any messages,calls or replied to pics. I waited a few weeks then tried again with a message to then being blocked.

I loved them more then I loved anyone before and I dont know why it came to that. I dont think I'll ever love again because one I know ill.never be that much in love again and I'm afraid if I love someone they will also try to commit suicide. I try so hard to spoil my partners but in the end I think my love is a burden to those who fall for me. And for that I'm truly sorry for I dont know what's wrong with me.

[tofuguy2]

That's a mood

[tofuguy2]

You just have to try

It gets easier, it gets easier everyday, but you have to do it every day, that's the hard part.

[tofuguy2]

Not sure what to do here

Well I'm not sure what to do here anymore the person. Who encouraged me to make this account blocked me on here. I guess this will just be a blog that I randomly type my anonymous thoughts that no one will read unless someone runs across them accidentally lol I was kind of excited to start using tumblr but I guess it's just a reminder of what a burden I am

[tofuguy2]

[tofuguy2]

Meh

I dont know what to say but I felt like writing but not in my usual pen and paper way for things in my life have been so strange day after day for the last 2 weeks it drops and peaks for a unknown reason my eye still seeks somthing I'm not sure how to obtain and it's starting to effect my brain in a not so clear way so it drains and it becomes harder and harder for feelings to be detained its excruciating and unbearable pain. I dont know why I am saying it here for this is a outlet I dont really use and it's clear with 3 post this entire year maybe it's because I want to say somthing I fear. And at this point I'm just typing first words that come to mind and it's like unraveling mine like one hundred yards of falling twine but I should stop now or it will go on forever but I guess il just continue to pretend I'm fine

[tofuguy2]

Lol that's a mood

[tofuguy2]

Some people lol