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✨️ Them ✨️

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rb to give a flower to the person you rb this from

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Matchmaker Draconia (Lilia)

Inspired by this

NOTE: I only write for female reader but everyone is welcome to read it!

Tall! Lilia referenced because Lilia should be allowed to change forms at will like the Bat King he is.

— ୧⁠(⁠＾⁠ ⁠〰⁠ ⁠＾⁠)⁠୨

"Wait, for real? Lemme see!"

Malleus angles the book so the Child of Man can see the picture. He has to admit, the picture is very flattering. He hasn't seen Lilia's other form (the Tall Form, as Silver calls it) in a long time, but it's hard not to recognize the man. Sure, the hair is much longer, and his features are much sharper, but his eyes are still the same dark pinkish red, and his smile still holds the same chaos loving curve.

"Damn, Mally-o, your Daddy is hot!" (Y/N) whistles, eyes wide as she takes in the image.

"... Lilia does run a bit warmer than me or Sebek, but his temperature is not too much higher than a human's."

"No– oh, God, I can't believe– Hornton, I meant, like—" she waves her hands around, trying to find the words—"he's, uh, attractive. A total DILF."

"... a total what?"

"Oh, God." she groans, a heavy blush settling on her cheeks. "DILF stands for 'Dad I'd Like to Fuck'."

Silence.

Malleus stares at her, then at the book, then at the silent walls of Ramshackle. Then back at her as it finally clicks.

"You want to bed my father?"

"Oh, God."

"I see," Malleus takes a hand to his chin, thoughts running through his mind while she hides her embarrassment with her hands. "And does your interest end there?"

"Oh, God, Hornton! Hornton, Mally, Malle-o, Mal-Mal, Horns-a-tron, please shut up," the Child of Man whines, still hiding her face.

"It's important, Child of Man. Does your interest in Lilia end in intercourse?"

"... no...?"

"No?"

"No. I... Please don't tell Lilia, I'll literally die," she asks, finally showing him her face. Once he nods, she relaxes, and he's glad she trusts him so much to do so. "I really really like him. I might even, like... love him? Maybe? I dunno, I just get really happy when I'm with him and I keep thinking about him and just seeing him makes my day..."

Wow. Malleus was not expecting a full on confession, but it is not unwelcomed. Not when he knows Lilia feels the exact same for the girl, and both Malleus and Silver—Sebek hasn't noticed yet—have been wondering what could be done to get the bat fae to confess. They both know, Malleus more than Silver, that Lilia feels unsure thanks to the different lifespans, and that he feels like he'll steal her away from greater opportunities than "an old bat" (his words).

"That's great news, Child of Man!" he exclaims, smile growing at the possibilities presenting to him. "Lilia would be delighted to hear that, you should tell him."

"Absolutely not, are you crazy?!"

Ah. Yes. (Y/N) can be just as stubborn as Lilia when she wants. It takes an entire hour of them going back and forth before Malleus finally gives up and promises—on his horns—that he won't tell Lilia that she likes him. The rest of the night goes without a hitch, and the night air is refreshing as he waves back at her, laughing when she points at her eyes with two fingers and then at him before closing the front door. Malleus lingers for a second outside, before teleporting himself to Diasomnia.

(Y/N) had prohibited magic inside Ramshackle after Ace and Grim almost burned it down. She can't physically do anything if anyone decides to ignore it, but she's so well loved and respected that everyone adheres to the rule.

Also, Lilia, in one of his rare moments of showing his true capacity, had made very clear that he'd have a talk with anyone who broke the rule.

Speaking off, Lilia is the first thing Malleus sees when he finally gets inside the dorm's living room. The bat fae is sitting on the couch with his phone and a cup of tea, as he usually is when Malleus is at Ramshackle. At first, Malleus thought he was just making sure his charge was ok—fae tend to be protective of what and who they consider theirs—, but now he knows better.

"(Y/N) says hello," he starts, taking a seat on the couch right across his mentor.

"Yeah? That sweet girl," Lilia's smile is pleased, dare he say loving, and his eyes, still glued to the screen, soften. "How is she? How was your little study date?"

No matter how many times Malleus tells him that they're not dates, Lilia seems to be determined on calling their encounters as such. If the dragon had to guess, the same inhibitors that stopped the older man's romance did not matter—in Lilia's mind—if it was Malleus.

Too bad for him that Malleus does not see his Child of Man as a romantic partner.

"She's never been better, the break Crowley gave her is doing wonders for her overall well being," the break that Lilia—and Malleus, but mostly Lilia—threatened Crowley into giving her. "Today we went over History of Magic, and her brilliant mind got us beyond the necessary material quickly."

"I'm happy to hear that~"

"There was a picture of you on one of the books."

"Oh?" Lilia perks up. He most definitely knows what picture Malleus is referring, but the young dragon says it anyways.

"A picture of your other form."

"I have many other forms."

"You know which one."

The bat laughs, childishly showing his tongue, and Malleus can only smile. No matter the form, the man's teasing and mischief loving nature always shines. No wonder he's seen as the odd one for his lively disposition when Briar Valley prides itself in it's solemnity.

"She thinks you look really good in that form," at that, Lilia places the phone on his lap and gives his charge his undivided attention. What was that expression humans use? Hook, line and sinker?

"Oh?"

"Said you are a DILF."

Silence.

Then Lilia barks the loudest laugh Malleus has ever heard from the man. It's a mix of disbelief and delight, and it shakes his tiny body so much the phone falls on the floor.

"Did she really?"

"Yes," Malleus admits without guilt, for he is not revealing her feelings, only thoughts. You'd think she'd be more careful with her words after befriending both Azul and Malleus.

"A DILF, huh? I guess that form really has its own charm."

"She also mentioned your current form being just as attractive."

"What are you trying to do here, Your Highness?"

Malleus blinks innocently at the accusation, not at all bothered by the suspicious yet terribly amused gaze of his mentor. He gets up and nods respectfully at the man.

"Just giving you the tea, I believe. I'll retire now, Lilia. Good night."

He leaves with Lilia's laughter as a companion, but soon finds himself alone, no doubt the bat fae going to Ramshackle. Part of him feels bad for sending the tiny agent of chaos (Y/N)'s way. Part of him hopes they'll get closer to a confession after tonight.

What he knows for sure, is that it's time for him and Silver to stop watching and start acting.

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now that maintenance has (i think) officially started…

MAY ALL CYNO WANTERS BE CYNO HAVERS !!!

MAY ALL CANDACE WANTERS BE CANDACE HAVERS !!!

MAY ALL VENTI WANTERS BE VENTI HAVERS !!!

MAY ALL NILOU WANTERS BE NILOU HAVERS !!!

MAY ALL ALBEDO WANTERS BE ALBEDO HAVERS !!!

HAPPY 3.1 EVERYONE <33

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My foster kitten

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You’re married to your phone background/lockscreen how fucked are you

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tar tar taglia lover of snezhnayan queen there was a cat that really was goneee

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please watch this two second clip from santa clarita diet

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I just saw Albedos new trailer. Quickly went to make this dumb short thing

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BIG BIRD IS TALKING ABOUT HIS COUSINS ON TWITTER THIS IS NOT A DRILL

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Scholarship essays want me to suck my own dick, but I’d much rather write about sucking Levi Ackerman’s.

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I don’t think healthy people every really get chronic illness.

I have a friend I know from when we were both 6. She is the only person living nearby and so she saw me go from walking through limping to wheelchair on a daily basis. I keep her updated on my health even tho we rarely hang out anymore. She was gonna come over yesterday and I had to cancel. She asked if I can’t hang out later that day. When I said i won’t feel better later, that if I feel that bad in the morning later will only get worse she got annoyed and “joked” that I’m just finding excuses. And I was surprised, she knows all about me being disabled after all? So, a bit taken aback, I told her it’s a normal thing for me.

“But you got the diagnosis now, aren’t you better?? I thought you’ll get better now”

She was honestly surprised and it made me realize a thing. They don’t get it. They don’t get that getting diagnosed only equals benefits like welfare or parking spot for us, and sometimes better pain meds but that is just like pushing luck. That it’s a forever thing. That that one day we felt good a week ago was just a bright spot and doesn’t mean we won’t need our aids anymore, cause chronic illness is not linear and will make a great comeback in next four hours, and the next good day is planned on when we’re 70. Cause when abled people are sick, they get better. And our illness is just an excuse for them. And when we say we will never get better they think we’re being dramatic and pessimistic. And I don’t think they’ll ever get it, cause to get it you need to live it. And I want my friends to stay healthy and not go through hell.