tombombadildos

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hey asshole! you lifted up the rock and now I have to scuttle! motherfucker!

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Thank god finally

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Honestly I keep Julian in my village to flirt with me, it’s great validation.

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I love it when AC gets philosophical

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Well, I have a dirty mind. 

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Went to take this picture of this insane bigfoot sex sign and only after opening my camera did i notice the entire flock of little chickens chilling in the dirt. life is good again

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Hyth 💜

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if this gets 100,000 notes then i, the worlds greatest space agency will personally shoot donald trump into the sun

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Me, age 10, doing an essay on the pharoah’s curse for school: huh. So this archeologist that died and everyone thought it was because he disturbed the pharoah’s tomb actually died because he used a rusty razor to shave and it infected a mosquito bite. I can see how people could come to that conclusion, but it is a bit silly

Me, today, shaving my mosquito bite-ridden legs: I must tread carefully lest I incur the pharoah’s wrath

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my wife insisted that clifford should play basketball and that blue should wear her oversized jerseys

+ bonus blue