tommytomtomato

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been getting into gnosia lately

SQ the diva and Setsu the non binary icon

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anyone interested in my emo kazui playlist

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all of the pjsk main characters colours arranged in rainbow order

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It’s so silly when people go "oh I love milgram but it’s so problematic and I don’t know if I can support this :(" yeah bro no shit

yuno t3 spoilers

i'll be so honest i can't tell if its just like 10 people on twitter I stumbled on or if people are genuinely worrying the milgram project creator is misogynistic because they put yuno in milgram for a probable suicide attempt induced miscarriage instead of a medically induced abortion, like we thought before

like maybe they might be idk them personally and most people have at least a little misogyny engraved in their beliefs because of how the world is, especially right now

but its already been established that milgram (the prison not the project itself) is misogynistic. it's homophobic. it's ableist. it's label for a 'murder' and 'murderer' are intentionally vague and disagreeable. it relies on child labor. it's physically restrains and mentally tortures its prisoners, and doesn't care about their well-being. it leaves "justice" in the hands of one, intentionally underinformed individual (and then again in the hands of the biased masses watching for entertainment). it does not go along with morals or laws. it's aim is for judgment, information gathering and entertainment. These things are INTENTIONAL. milgram (again I'm talking about the prison) is corrupt. its BAD!!! it always has been!!! I'm pretty sure that's part of the point of all this.

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Sometimes I forget that Fuuta isn’t canonically trans and proceed to get whiplash while trying to read a fic like why does he have balls

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I asked my best friend to draw Fuuta and they ended up drawing 0307 😭

bonus/full under the cut (TW: satire/ that one gay template)

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could you guys go listen to my popy cover of unicorn please and thank you

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i very rarely draw Milgram, and if i do, it's usually Fuuta (today no exceptions)

looking forward to his cover, i'm sure "Rookie" will sound even cooler

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Took some time to let the all of that process. Talked about it a lot with people online and offline. And honestly... Yuno's story is incredibly tragic.

The entire time the writing in her songs lyrics and the voice dramas was pushing for a neutral response. Pushing to have this person voted 50/50 because she had just not done anything. All she had done was live her life in a way that she knew many others would have varying opinions on.

This whole time that she was here she said she didn't like being lectured like that. Being told if something was bad or good. She said from the onset,

"Am I a bad girl? Please don’t answer."

The story kept repeating it over and over,

"Don’t weigh me measure me against your morality. Just shut it, will you? You know it all."

"I’m the one who chose, let you and you and you all in. Happy or sad? Why decide?"

Until the final moment when everything breaks down and she's begging to be looked at with any sort of nuance. Where instead of asking to be viewed neutral or in an it is what it is fashion? Instead of asking to be allowed to just exist outside of this binary she's begging,

"Don’t forgive me don’t forgive me don’t forgive me don’t forgive me."

It's incredibly tragic because the things Yuno has done. How she just lived her life isn't something worthy of judgment or scrutiny of any kind. It may be are first instinct to tell someone not to be hard on themselves and smoother them in reasons why what happened wasn't their fault or excusable.

Yet, that ultimately ignores the feelings of the person being spoken to. It robs of them of the space they need and deserve to allow themselves to be upset. It's like telling someone to hurry up, get happy, stop beating yourself up. Yet, feelings aren't that simple. How one feels can't be rationalized away. The ways people internalize their own lives, their experiences, the myriad of things that they feel...

The things that can be seen, the things that they can manage to say, and everything unspoken. All of that can't and shouldn't be boiled down to one simple thing. To judge someone whether that judgment be positive or negative is still judging them. You cannot offer forgiveness or receive forgiveness without admitting something done was wrong.

"“Indecent” and “careless”, but still you judge “innocent” with a shrug?"

That someone has done something worthy of getting judged. A lot of times personally when I'm feeling down about the horrid things that happen in my own life hearing about how wronged I was or how I didn't do anything bad doesn't help me. We've all had times when we've spoken to someone and left not feeling heard.

Leaving the other person feeling like,

Yuno Second Voice Drama 1:46s

"If you ask me, Kotoko is someone I would never want to make my friend, though. She's the type who picks a conclusion from the very beginning and won't actually talk with you."

Instead of being listened to their just being spoken out. No one is hearing what they said just waiting for their own turn to speak. A position many have been in and done to another before. It's tempting to give our opinions on things.

However, I personally draw the line at telling others how they should live and view their own lives. Because people's lives shouldn't be boiled down to that. People shouldn't be scrutinized for doing things that haven't harmed anyone or were simply unfortunate accidents. I was talking to my therapist today about how all of this worked out.

After I explained what Yuno had done and read her the report all she said was that's the Just-world Fallacy. Ultimately taking the time to talk to as many people about everything that happened in Yuno's case made me realize my discomfort with all of this.

It's still what I said it was before when people were saying maybe these characters didn't kill anyone in the traditional sense. Maybe some of these things were accidents maybe, maybe they were just involved by happenstance. That's not murder. That's just someone going through their normal lives.

No one can live their entire lives without negatively impacting someone in someway. There are people we will never be aware of even hurting who were impacted by our presence in one way or another. There are going to be people we know we wronged intimately in our own lives. No one lives a fully righteous life free of any mistakes or regrets.

But that doesn't mean that everyone deserves to be judged the same. It doesn't mean we should just,

"Say that sympathy is useless. Hate evil as the evil that it is."

Treat every transgression as equal.

Punish people disproportionally- judge a person for just living their life in a way that some may find inconvenient or immoral. Everyone who lives a life is inconvenient to someone, somewhere, sometime. People have the right to be inconvenient, have the right to our feelings, have the right to the space necessary to feel what we feel about our own experiences and time on this earth free of judgment from others.

It doesn't matter if others want to condemn or help a person everyone is deserving of that space and time. Everyone has the right to not be bothered or have our own experiences sensationalized. All the way through this that was something Yuno asked for. Something the audience never gave her.

Honestly, I don't know if this is the best possible outcome for Yuno. I can't say if this is a good thing or not. It really just is what it is. However, I can say from beginning to end she remained herself.

As well as this was very intentionally done looking back on it. It feels like this was done to highlight how to forgive someone one has to judge them, one has to tell that person they're forgiving that something they did was wrong, one has to admit there is something that needs forgiving. To do that one has to judge that person, one has to look for something they did wrong, one has to see a offense.

Yuno's First Voice Drama 6:45s,

"Well, that thing I was doing, which seemingly could be called "murder"- would be my first guess."

That's right. Very well, then how do you feel about your sin? Should it be forgiven or is it unforgivable?

"Hm, who know? I haven't got a clue. Thinking about it is such a hassle after all."

Think about it.

"Um... To be honest, prison guard. If you can't forgive me, then you don't have to."

You have no desire to be forgiven?

"Even if I have to apologize like my life is on the line, then I wouldn't mind doing so. It's the result of doing what I wanted to do after all."

To forgive someone for living is to make them apologize for having lived at all. In doing such a thing there is always the risk making the people feel like,

"In that case, I should have been the one. That’s the correct answer, but then why."

"Think about those who should have lived instead of me, so why."

"Why, why, if only I were never born, if only. Why, why, I’m so sorry."

In the end judging how people live without limits really only allows the person scrutinizing to feel-

"Caressing me with your “Good girl”. Who needs your self-righteous pardon?"/ "You and you, throwing around rules for fun, hoisting up morality and feeling good."

Futa's Second Voice Drama 6:54s,

"...Don't make a fool of me. I've seen it! The way you got amusement out of your actions like it was just a game! The way you so-easily elevated yourself to act as a one-person jury!! That, being the same as me?!"

...!

"You've got to be kidding! I am the warden of MILGRAM, the one who judges your sins. It's not just you and Mahiru- I've faced all ten of your prisoners with my own life."

Don't lump me in with someone like you, who used someone's sins for cheap entertainment!

...Heh... Haha... Ahahahaha!! Pheew... (catching his breath from laughing his ass of this hard at Es' and the audiences' lack of self-awareness) WEHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! YOU'VE GOTTA BE A COMPLETE IDIOT!

"Excuse me?"

JUST HOW BIG OF A DEAL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?! Seems like that fancy hat and outfit of yours are making you feel real high and mighty!

"Careful with your words, prisoner number three!"

You faced all of this seriously? For real?! You didn't feel the slightest bit entertained by my crime or my punishment?!

"What are you...?"

Listen. I could hear your voice, too. The whole time.

Voices I didn't even want to hear...the whole time! Even if I covered my ears, I COULD STILL HEAR THEM IN MY HEAD!

"..."

Countless voices, judging me with all sorts of words...

Out of interest.

Just for fun.

Out of resentment.

Keh, hahaha!! None of that made you sound like as good of a person as you're telling me you are.

You haven't been any different from me!

Man things that hit even better now than when it was said back then. So, how exactly is what the audience put these ten people through some of which may not have actually committed murder at all any different from what they voted Futa guilty from the onset for? Something they caused him to lose an eye and get jumped over? How is scrutinizing anyone for just living their lives any different then complaining about someone recreating a hat online? Especially considering even to vote people need to use the same fucking website Futa did that got him here.

Man how awkward right? Well this isn't about him though...

Yuno's First Voice Drama 5:29s

"That's right. You know those people who just wanna convince themselves, so they intrude on other people's affairs even though it's not their place- I despise them. That's what I was saying. They only do that to make themselves feel better, don't they? Those people don't actually end up doing anything."

Yuno...

"No matter how many chilling memories I had to go through, those people never gave me any warmth."

How can being meet with judgment be a kind thing? How can having your, every day life be interrogated be a kind thing, how can being blamed for your circumstances told-

Yuno's Second Voice Drama 6:35s,

"Hm... well then, should I tell you what I heard the voices in my head saying?

Because she's pitiable.

There's no mistake that she has some kind of reason.

She's become like this because there's some problem in her home life. Because she doesn't know love yet.

Ah...! "Because of that... I'll forgive her!"

How could having one's life, one's decisions... Viewed under such a light be anything but tragic? But well everyone just wanted to voice their opinion right? Say what's right was right and what was wrong was wrong?

I just thought that wrong things were wrong, and that a crime is a crime! YOU GET THAT DON'T YOU?!

Of course people only think giving an opinion is warranted when they only want to state their own. So, maybe I'm reading too much into it and it's not that deep. It's super simple and this is happening for no reason. Maybe I'm giving the story too much credit. But it's more fun that way.

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Funniest shit about it being confirmed Yuno didn't murder is the fact that it is so easy to solve certain sins now.

Oh, you thought you could judge Futa his crime is literally taking a picture because of laws around that in Japan. Making the sin he's in here for taking a walk and taking a picture of something. A thing he's highlighted doing twice in Bring It On. He was like I didn't spread it and Milgram went lmao we don't care jail for you. Then the audience got him jumped and permanently disabled because they voted the lady who inserts herself into other people's plights just to feel strong innocent. The character the most and least like him. His logical extreme.

Kazui whelp as we see he wasn't even at the balcony in his undercover shot. So what happened there- Is probably they had an argument he left as he was coming back she did that. He even was like, only I would consider myself a murderer when we got here. Explaining the word guy downstairs because it's just fucking where he actually was. If he is in this bitch for having an argument and telling the truth. What does that say about the audience due to what they tried to do to him? Which was pay people to literally vote him guilty just because they wanted to see him bound up? Just because it would be fun. Oh, or the choosing to scrutinize and criminalize his romantic and sexual inclinations? As if that's anyone's business but his own and those he's comfortable telling.

Shidou well his undercover shot is his hands looking shaky after a surgery. The photo on his prisoner card is an operating room. His undercover Es victim scene is him punching Es in the stomach which is more than like a more violent depiction of an operation. He said he had many victims but it really simply could be him fucking having guilt over losing patients during medically necessary possibly life saving procedures. Yet not wanting to stop being a doctor despite that because if there are people who need help he wants to help them. Now he's dead because he was put in a prison with actual murderers and wrongfully assumed that they were all like himself people who did something that led to a death. Made that assumption with the wrong one and found out. I mean, he wanted to die. So, he got what he wanted on that one but wild if he didn't kill anyone.

Fucking Mahiru was just telling the truth and it was a super normal relationship but this guy committed suicide too for reasons she exacerbated. Yet her undercover es victim shot is her choking Es because she was a smoothering presence that ultimately exacerbated things. Or even more outlandish her hobby was traveling and exciting things. The undercover prisoner card photo for her is a picture of a fucking cave and we see them both traveling in I Love You. Very well could be they could have just been in a caving accident, and he died that way. Then Milgram went if you weren't pushing him to travel, he'd still be alive, and now she too is dead. Which wild way to internalize that but alright have at it.

With Kotoko, well, we know she killed someone there are in canon documents saying that she did that. There was a court case about it. I mean, at that point, it's if one wants to believe how she framed it or not. If it was just oh no a crime in progress accidentally beats up criminal too hard which okay fine whatever. Then goes onto make a habit of this with the other guy in the ally because it just felt that good. Why the fuck did the girl retract her testimony and why was she highlighted at all as connected to this sin.

Haruka, Mu, Amane, and Mikoto all did that shit though. They like did that we see them do that in their music videos in instances that are clearly real life scenes. Everyone one else though that shit is mostly in their fucking heads. With very little allusions to their real lives. They are in here for feeling bad about mundane shit. Because Milgram went wow that sucks you want to see how society feels about that real quick maybe get some closure. Then these guys in the best case scenario said,

"Sure, I would like to do that. I would like to seek out some sort of punishment or confirmation that what happened wasn't that bad or my fault."

Or, in the worst-case scenario, they just felt so guilty about the thing that Milgram just abducted them for it. Both of which are incredibly funny scenarios and definitely something Jackalope of all people would do.

Then when things got real due to Kotoko they were all like,

"Hey, this isn't what I signed up for. You should probably stop this immediately."

Which fucking wild. Like Shidou bluntly went to Es, you should stop this in his trial two voice drama and was surprised when they couldn't. Kazui brought it up as well. It's so stupid at first, then I think of the implications and-

LMAO that's evil and fucked up you threw some of these normal people in there with the human equivalent of Cassowaries and went well if no one sets off the cassowaries they should be fine. Just don't fucking set it off losers it's up to you to be a good enough judge of character to discern who is a threat or not then act accordingly. Aww, you set off one of them round one boo-hoo poor fucking you cassowary attack be upon you all.

Some of these people are doing Milgram, the others have been put in the fucking torment nexus for doing something that can be grossly misinterpreted as murder just because a person died and they are their own worst advocates because of how guilty they feel about it. Meanwhile the people who seem to have straight up murdered people are here discussing how what Milgram is doing is illegal actually, they need to get back home to not lose their job, crying for seven whole minutes about wanting to see their families, going well I probably shouldn't be around people on account of the fact I don't trust myself like that ya know due to the murder I definitely committed.

Just to be told, actually, what you did was fine- In fact, you should do it again. I'll give you the weapon too if you need me to. While they make the other people who actually did nothing look worse comparatively because like no one in their right mind would go yes I think this person who was just living their life, doing normal every day things, that resulted in complications beyond them should be locked up in the same prison as individuals who killed people except fucking Kotoko who said exactly that in Deep Cover and Milgram said her sentiments fit their own well and she from the onset said she liked Milgram.

Yuno's lucky to be alive right now. Wild.

Honestly, love that for some of these guys. That's fucked up and wrong and sure if I knew that from the start I may have done some things differently. But like all I can do now is go got damn that's a way to confirm something a lot of fans wanted and speculated about just to have them go,

"Wait, oh no, that's really bad actually."

And prove Yuno's and my own point of hey it's actually really bad to judge people outside of the law for just how they live their lives. That's really bad if they are in here for something that is not murder I don't want to think about that. I hope they killed so many people because we know some of these people did, in fact, kill and could have done it again. Like what if we voted Mu innocent last trial and Yuno died as the fucking result of that choice due to her ignoring her. Then fucking what?

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thank you and goodbye, yuno

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My Thoughts on Yuno's Story:

Milgram is a take on society. It's not about whether or not she's actually a murderer or deserves to be punished for her crimes, it's about the fact that society sees her that way. She's a sex worker who (intentionally or not, though i believe it was intentional) fell down a flight of stairs and lost the child she was pregnant with. She didn't feel guilty about it until coming to Milgram, a metaphor for being exposed to the society that is judging her. It doesn't matter what she was voted, it was the fact that she was judged in the first place that made her feel guilty for it. Because it became a question of "was this wrong?" when it wasn't before. And my impression is that she doesn't feel guilty for the abortion / miscarriage (whichever it was), but feels bad over the fact that she doesn't feel guilty over it. She feels like she should, because society makes it seem like she should. That's why she's here.

I don't think they're trying to villainize her for having an abortion or anything like that, I think they're just drawing attention to the fact that it is considered a morally wrong act by society. Milgram itself is what's villainizing her, not the creators.

Idk if this makes sense or communicates what I'm thinking properly but. I just don't understand why people are getting so mad about it. Specifically people who are mad that she didn't do anything wrong when thats the point. Like, they wanted her to be worse to justify her being there when there is no justification, which is the point.

Ifff any of that makes sense. Yeah.

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Wip

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I left my journal open after writing one sentence and my brother decided to annotate my 0307 wip 😭

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Cat dance, baby. Be a wise servant to love Tempting misery, love's guilty labyrinth

with the original MV background color

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I’m sorry but I still think that the “prisoners are taken from different time periods” thing is stupid. Like yeah Haruka forgot about his age. Yuno’s birthdate might have been a mistake OR she could have just been pretending to be 18? Also about the flip phones and stuff in Cat. Kazui would have been in his 20s in the early 2000s so it would make sense for those to be there since he’s looking back on his life? It’s not actually that deep people just want Haruka to be 17 I swear