tomthebassoon

[tomthebassoon]

actually im so fucking tired of having to do everything for myself. if i dont do the dishes, the dishes dont get done. if i dont wash my clothes, my clothes dont get clean. if i dont find food, i dont eat. if i dont go and get new tires for the car, the car doesnt get new tires. if i dont actively love myself, i dont receive love. if i dont care for myself when i get sick, i dont get better. if i dont find a therapist, i dont get a therapist. if i dont take care of my body every day, i feel like crap (i feel like crap anyway). if i dont carve out time by myself to make music, i dont get to make music. and i have to work 40+ fucking hours every goddamn week, not even working towards the career i want, just to keep my head above water. its fucking exhausting and if i dont sacrifice time from something else, i dont get to rest.

like i really hate to voice this negativity bc ive been trying hard not to focus on it, but it feels like life isnt supposed to be this hard. ive been trying so so hard; ive been cleaning up after myself, ive been eating my fruits and veggies, ive been making my friends spend time with me, ive been taking my iron pills, ive been stretching, ive been sleeping 8 hours, but its so much work to do it all by myself. like honestly i miss being part of a family and living in an environment where people take care of each other. i think that's it, really. im not meant to be all alone; im meant to help others and be helped. i just cant do it all by myself anymore.

[tomthebassoon]

Look, we joke a lot, but really, "you were born evil, wretched, worse than the scum of the earth, and it took killing a god to make you salvageable, so now you'd better be grateful to that god and thank him 10,000 times a day for it and fill your thoughts with him 24/7 and abide by the letter of his every word, lest you suffer unimaginable torture for all of eternity" is a truly horrendous thing to believe about yourself and other people

[tomthebassoon]

Confession: The letter “t” key on my laptop has been broken since 2024. From what my research tells me, they can’t fix individual keys on that model, and my laptop is no longer under a warranty, but it seems foolish to fork out over $900 for a new computer, so instead I’ve trained my brain to hit ctrl+v every time I want to hit “t.”

But sometimes I have to copy-paste something else besides “t,” which means I need a readily available place to copy the “t” from.

My first thought was to search “tiger” on Google, but if you can’t type the letter “t,” you just get search results about Bob Iger.

I realized words that end with “t” are easier for Google to autocomplete, so the first one I thought of was “crypt.” But wouldn’t you know, googling “cryp” takes to you to cryptocurrency results, and I REALLY don’t want my algorithm thinking I google that multiple times per week.

Then I remembered a cool place I went in London, called Cafe in the Crypt. It’s exactly what it sounds like and located below St. Martin-in-the-Fields Church. When I type in “Cafe in Cryp,” Google does indeed autocomplete it effectively! So I either keep that search result open in a tab or Google it every day.

So, that being said, if anyone works for St. Martin-in-the-Fields Church’s marketing department and has been utterly flummoxed by an IP address from Virginia that has googled their cafe hundreds of times over the past 6 months… that wasn’t a bot, that was me.

I am the Spiders Georg of Cafe in the Crypt.

Anyway, it’s a pretty cool place to check out if you’re ever in London. Just maybe not cool enough to Google it on a daily basis for months straight.

[tomthebassoon]

at some point in your life you will be boiling fruit, water, sugar, and lemon juice in a pot to make a syrup or jam. the instructions will tell you to simmer for a certain amt of time. your timer will go off and you will look at the pot and go, "hm, this doesn't look thick enough. maybe i'll let it go for another 10 minutes." this is the devil speaking. it's only so liquid right now because it is at boiling point. it will thicken when it cools down. learn from the follies of my youth and do not let this happen to you

[tomthebassoon]

[tomthebassoon]

if a fictional character gets stabbed, they have only 2 valid options:

1. slowly raise their hand to the wound and/or pull the weapon impaling them out while everyone stares in horror before collapsing to the ground from shock and/or blood loss and being caught just in time by their friend/sibling/love interest

2. hide the wound beneath a dark item of clothing in preparation for the dramatic reveal later where another character touches them and their hand comes away bloody or they overexert themselves and they stumble and wince but still try to insist they’re fine, even though they’re clearly in pain and struggling to stay on their feet, and as the other character peels back their jacket it becomes clear that they’re badly hurt and have been for a while (bonus points if they’re wearing a white shirt underneath)

[tomthebassoon]

Being a little too cold: brrrr i’m a little too cold !!!

Being a little too warm: i am going to kill the next person who makes eye contact with me.

[tomthebassoon]

me, every few months: thats it, im going to cure my iron deficiency! it's so simple, i just have to take my pills, i dont know why i never take them! im going to start right now!

me, for the next couple of hours: ougbh my tumnby

[tomthebassoon]

I've slowly been chipping away at drawing scenes from that imaginary Muppet retelling of the Princess Bride, figured it was about time to share what I've drawn on Tumblr!

[tomthebassoon]

on some level it’s so funny how ‘socialist’ and ‘communist’ are still like. horrible terrible scary labels for a person in the US. almost akin to ‘puppy killer’ and ‘serial murderer’. the most evil thing some can imagine. the red scare propaganda worked so well that socialists are still the monster in the closet for a large portion of the US population. “you’re going to vote for a SOCIALIST?” and ‘socialist’ is said with the same scandalized, disgusted, disbelieving weight of ‘pedophile’

[tomthebassoon]

I want to own a house and have a garden in the back and a fruit tree in front and I want to tell the neighborhood kids that they can come pick the fruits when they want as long as they leave some for others, and I want to host dinners for friends and make too much food and make everyone go home with some leftovers, and I want to grow vegetables in my garden and beg my neighbors to take all this zucchini off my hands or I'll have to eat zucchini for every meal for the next few months, and I want to give and feed and love but I need more goddamn money first

[tomthebassoon]

i speak for the trees and the trees fucking hate the US government

[tomthebassoon]

debbie downer and negative nancy should lez out

[tomthebassoon]

staying up until 1am with your friends is like. wow we’re so fucking cool we’re so fucking badass we should go on a road trip or become famous or maybe hang out here forever because i dont wanna be anywhere that isnt with you guys im so full of love and joy and a live fast die young mentality. and staying up until 1am by yourself is like. for the third time this year i am genuinely contemplating suicide. good thing i dont have the executive function to clean up my room

[tomthebassoon]

I wish depression were an emergency. I wish someone could take one look at how sick I am and go “oh my god, we need to get you to a hospital!” and then when we get there I get rushed into surgery and the surgeons say “it’s a good thing you brought her here when you did, this is a seriously advanced case” and then they put me under and spend the next ten hours pulling metres of long, sticky black strands of gunk out of my body, throwing it immediately into an incinerator so that it can’t infect anyone else. And then they could stitch me back up and I could rest a few days, and when I leave the hospital everyone can see how much better I am and they congratulate me saying “well done, you’ve been so brave, I’m so glad you’re ok. I love you.”

[tomthebassoon]

holds the door for women because im a girl gentleman

[tomthebassoon]

this is KILLING me 😭😭😭😭