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tsubakachronicles · 6 months ago

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listen, now that everything is said and done i'm going to say something i've been thinking but not outright saying for the past nearly four years. frankly, imogen and laudna's relationship is a pale shadow of caleb and veth's and if you really sit and think about it, it's outright embarrassing for the former party. it's like if you saw a beautiful piece of art and tried to emulate it and then the only thing you managed to jot down that was the same was the basic shape and you never added any color when the color was the most important part. imogen and laudna's relationship is formed out of almost the exact same origins (troubled mage who needs to keep a distance from regular society joins up with monstrous misfit with a traumatic backstory and become each other's most important person while traveling place-to-place because they keep getting into trouble in cities). the difference is, genuinely, how much more colorful and lived in caleb and veth's story feels. they met in a podunk county jail and worked together to break out of the place, stayed together for practical reasons (straight-up survival) and then out of genuine friendship. they were hobos in the woods together. they cuddled on the side of the roads on cold nights together. they were genuinely each other's sole lifeline because they were the type of people no one in the world cared about in a very real, visceral way. they were also con artists, and sam and liam worked together to come up with an entire booklet of different cons they used to survive, which come into play surprisingly often during the campaign (Modern Literature, famously, but also Mother's Love and Money Pot featured).

comparatively, we know next to nothing about what imogen and laudna's lives looked like after leaving gelvaan, and the Incident™️ that sent them running in the first place remains amorphous and random no matter how many times the story is told or whatever extra details get added. the people of gelvaan found laudna to be a generically threatening presence (because of her fun-scary appearance and/or kooky-fun-scary behavior) and picked up their torches and pitchforks to run her out of town. imogen heard her thoughts and found them so beautiful she nearly killed two of the townspeople she grew up with the defend her and then they fled into the night together. and that's it. what did they do for two entire years after that? i don't know! neither do you. they don't appear to have struggled for money like caleb and veth did, there's no reference to hard-living, no real reference to what jobs they took to stay afloat, no mention of the practical realities of living as homeless nomads, no mention of towns and cities they'd visited and how those places impacted them. nothing. empty. no color. how did their relationship develop? also don't know! they seem to have slotted together perfectly as friends with no conflict for years before slotting together perfectly as lovers while batting aside all attempts at conflict later. done and dusted, that's the relationship, and people have the gall to call caleb and veth's successor relationship 'soulmatism' when it doesn't hold a candle to what the original offered.

which was, to be clear, endless complexity. i can't tell you how to define it, and i don't think the character's themselves could define it if they tried. sam went into the campaign intending to lean into a familial relationship and quickly realized that wasn't the vibe, course-corrected into veth having a crush on caleb--something sam has said developed fairly early in the campaign.* liam went into the relationship not intending to care about her nearly as much as he ended up doing, then spent the early campaign eps grappling with just how suddenly important she was to him, to the point that, in the face of her potentially dying in episode 20, liam says to sam, "do you want to make my character turn evil already?"** both were surprised at how tightly their characters clung to each other, and developed a deeply caring, highly insular dynamic where they were suspicious of outsiders and desperately guarded each other. with full retrospect, both went into the relationship intending to use each other (caleb for general usefulness/protection and veth, obviously, hoping caleb could change her back one day), then found such deep and tender care that they became each other's worlds. for a time. until nott became veth and veth had a husband and it sent their relationship into a tailspin because no matter how you frame the relationship, caleb clearly felt his feelings for her and the way they behaved together stepped over the line of how one should act with a married woman. after that, he is terrified of the idea that he might not have a place in her life and works so hard to create opportunities to insinuate himself into her present and future (teleportation spells so she can travel home quickly and still return to the group, making room for her family in the tower so she can stay with him, offering to tutor luc in magic to stay in her life, etc). veth gets her body and her life back but fears returning home will be lackluster compared to what she's experienced with the group, starts falling out of love with her husband, and has intense extra-martial feelings for caleb that are canonical. their relationship morphs and changes constantly throughout the campaign, and the one thing about their dynamic that never changes is how deeply and truly they love each other. you want to talk about soulmatism? them being the two party members with fake names who's real names share aspects of each other ("Bren" and "Brenatto") both from small-town dwendalian empire who's lives have been deeply impacted by meddling of the cerberus assembly (veth's in adulthood, caleb's in childhood) and who's deepest traumas are respectively fire and water does the trick for me.

so why is one so popular and the other, particularly as a romantic ship, very much is not? it would be obtuse of me not to immediately point to the fact that imogen and laudna are two pretty, skinny white women who claim to have deliciously little agency in their own stories and provide a blank enough canvas that the relationship can be whatever you want it to be. there's a reason there's so many AU fics for them, after all. caleb and veth on the other hand would center first a relationship between the handsome white fandom-popular sadboi and *checks notes* a self-described ugly, unfeminine goblin with deep neuroses and later a short, fat brown woman who also happens to be a young mother from a small country town. popular fandom, tragically, will almost always turn away from dealing with complexity of the latter for the empty calories of the former regardless of the quality gap between the two. if anything, watching the popularity of imogen and laudna's relationship has cemented my opinion that if veth had been different (either a man or a generically attractive white woman or someone more conventionally pretty just in general), widobrave would have been a massively popular ship, and i think it would have been regardless of veth's marriage. people can forgive a lot to write about their two generically attractive favorites getting together. they're a lot less forgiving for an ugly goblin or a fat, brown young mother, though.

tldr: reject modernity, embrace tradition. ship widobrave

*Talks Machina for C2E88, VOD no longer available, but a paraphrase of the quote can be found here **(2:09:30 on the YouTube VOD).

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tsubakachronicles · 1 year ago

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Project 2025 would ban anything the far right considers pornography. The far right considers anything queer-positive to be pornography, and they WILL encode that into law if given just a TINY bit more power.

Have queer fanfic (or trad published literature) or pics of your transition, or of two men kissing, saved to your hard drive? If the GOP get their way, you'd be guilty of possession of pornography. Did you share any of it? You'd be guilty of distribution of pornography. Have a sweet coming of age story with a queer protagonist? That'd be child pornography.

Even now, states are trying to make it a crime to be openly queer in public (by, among other things, classifying dressing as the "wrong gender" anyplace kids might see as a sex crime against children). Oh, and Florida tried (and thankfully failed) to impose the death penalty for the above.

This is just one example of the horrors awaiting us if the project comes to fruition.

And the far right is already screaming that any adult who mentions around kids that queer people exist is "grooming" children. Wear your Pride shirt past a playground? You're now a child groomer. Think they won't put that into law if allowed? You're naive.

The GOP currently controls the Supreme Court (which is how they overturned Roe v. Wade) and has a majority in one branch of congress. Imagine what will happen nationwide with the GOP controlling every branch of government, including supermajoroties in both houses of Congress.

Oh, and top GOP officials have also announced their desire to NUKE Gaza, so don't come at me with, "but I can't vote blue because Biden..." Or tell me how you think Gaza would somehow be better off with Trump and the GOP.

In France, the left and center joined together--even though they disagree vehemently on many issues (get two leftists together and they'll have three positions on any issue)--to stop the far right from totally taking over, because the one thing they ALL agree on is that fascists dictatorships are BAD.

Much the same with the UK finally kicking out their own neo-fascist party, the Torries, to install 400 Labour MPs. Not everyone loves Labour's policies, but virtually everyone with a brain cell recognizes that the Torries are fascists, and that FASCISM BAD.

"Every election, they tell us this is the most important election if our lives!" Yeah, because each election over the past several decades has been more important than the one before, until we are now at a tipping point between remaining a fucked up oligarchy with SOME resemblance to freedom, and an outright neo-fascist military dictatorship.

Trump has literally stated publicly his intent to criminalize dissent, use US armed forces against protesters (Kent State, but multiply it by thousands), purge all agencies and stuff them with those personally loyal to him, and use the DOJ to go after anyone he perceives as a threat to his political power, among other things.

And remember the things he did in office, like pulling the teeth of federal workplace protections for queer folks (which Biden reatored).

I don't care if you don't like Biden or Harris. Neither do I. But the alternative is Trump, and anyone telling you not to vote in 2024, or to vote third party, is rooting for Trump, and for Project 2025. Anyone telling you not to vote does not give one single solitary flying fuck about vulnerable populations in the US or anywhere else in the world.

"You're just being an alarmist!" Right. Like I was being alarmist when I predicted the failed Jan 6 coup attempt. Like I was being alarmist when I said the GOP would try to use control over SCOTUS to overturn Roe v. Wade.

Fucking vote.

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tsubakachronicles · 1 year ago

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"I already knew that you liked me. But do you know that I like you?"

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tsubakachronicles · 1 year ago

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Happy Birthday Sunshine! <3 <3

Kinda a redraw from a 2016 Otoya~ Im glad I can make him look a lot mroe like himself now.

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tsubakachronicles · 1 year ago

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Y'all are amazing. Reblog to hug the person you’re reblogging from.

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tsubakachronicles · 1 year ago

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Ai Mikaze (All Star)

Translator: Nadie (twitter: NmoniaG)

Proofreader: Raz (twitter: agnadance)

Love End: Winter Blossom

I’m waiting in the hallway when Senpai leaves the dressing room in his costume.

Overall, the outfit is white and adorned with fluttery feathers that fit our song's theme.

Haruka Nanami: Oh, you look like a prince!

Ai Mikaze: Really? If you say that even I might get bashful.

He tilts his head and the feathers in his hair sway with the motion.

Haruka Nanami: …Senpai….

As I watch him, I have a feeling that he might just quietly disappear, so I grab hold of his sleeve.

The hand underneath his sleeve is burning hot.

I look up and see his troubled expression.

It's not just his hand, his arm and cheeks are also emitting a fiery heat.

I recall Shinomiya-san’s reluctant face from earlier.

Haruka Nanami: How much time is… left?

Silence.

Ai Mikaze: …So you found out. In that case I’ll tell you.

He pounds on his own chest.

Ai Mikaze: Honestly, it might be any moment now. Aside from some trivial information, quite a big amount of my memory is already gone.

However, before my memory gets erased my system might actually reach its limit first.

Haruka Nanami: You mean your… body?

Ai Mikaze: Mhm…. I thought it would be the last to break so I didn't expect this. How troublesome. In any case, it’s only a matter of time until I can’t sing.

I keep resisting, but the damage has reached the point where standing is already… pretty tough.

And just like that, the moment we’ve worried about is here.

Senpai sways and tilts over, but I go to hold him up.

Haruka Nanami: Should I call the professor? Or maybe—

I consider taking him back to the dressing room but he grabs me by my arm.

Ai Mikaze: Hah… I’m fine so stay with me until the show starts. No matter if it’s for one minute or one second… Right now, I want to stay with you.

His breath is ragged. I've never seen him in so much pain.

I nod and support him as we head backstage where there is no one around.

We’re hiding in the back as he leans on a wall to catch his breath.

In this gloomy and empty place, we can hear the other contestants through a monitor.

He grasps my hand and although the heat remains, at least his breathing calmed down.

Ai Mikaze: I’m sorry. I’m worrying you until the end.

The end….

Those words pierce my heart.

Nevertheless, I remember our promise so I bring myself to smile.

Haruka Nanami: That’s not true. I know that you’ll perform the song well, so there’s nothing to worry about.

Ai Mikaze: Of course I will. I'll do all that I can to deliver this song—your feelings—to everyone properly….

With those tender words he gently lifts my hand.

Ai Mikaze: I'll be singing with all my strength, which means I may not be able to be with you for your debut.

But if it’s you, it’ll be fine. I’m sure you’ll be able to do it.

I want to sing your song and I also want to let you debut. These are the first dreams I ever had. And today I'm finally going to make those dreams come true.

I’ll open the future for you. That’s why… you have to do your best.

I cannot hold my tears back anymore—they start flowing down my face.

Haruka Nanami: I’m sorry… I can’t… keep my promise anymore!

Ai Mikaze: It’s alright. Whether you laugh or cry, I still love you.

Mikaze-senpai wipes my tears away with his finger.

Ai Mikaze: I really love you.

His lips softly touch mine.

Ai Mikaze: Nh… I love you…. Haruka…. I really… loved you….

He kisses me on my forehead, my eyelid, my cheek, and once more on my lips.

Lovingly showering me in tender kisses.

Without realizing it, his warmth already reaches me through our entangled fingers.

Ai Mikaze: I don’t want to disappear…. I really don’t want to disappear! I want to stay with you forever and ever.

But… as long as I can leave even a few memories behind, that's enough. I’ll leave the proof of my existence in you.

Thank you for everything.

Haruka Nanami: No, I should be thanking you…!

Ai Mikaze: Even if I’m reborn as another being… I’ll find you again, no matter what.

Haruka Nanami: …I’ll be waiting.

He nods, narrowing his eyes.

Ai Mikaze: I love you so much….

He gives me one last gentle kiss.

We hear cheering from the monitor. It's Mikaze-senpai’s turn next.

Ai Mikaze: … I have to go now.

Our lips, bodies, and hands part.

Senpai’s warmth is fading away.

Still, there’ll surely be warmth in his singing.

Senpai is heading to the stage.

His cheeks are paler than usual and gently glow under the stage lights.

His posture is perfect. Looking at him now, it’s as if his condition earlier was a lie.

Ai Mikaze: Bye-bye, Haruka.

Amidst the cheering, Senpai whispers these words into my ear and heads straight for the stage.

The stage is sparkling in blue lights and the person who is heading towards it looks just like a mermaid returning to the ocean.

As Senpai walks up to the microphone and begins to speak, the audience falls silent as the deep sea around him.

Ai Mikaze: I’m going to sing with all my feelings. Please listen to it: “Winter Blossom”.

Tomochika Shibuya: Mh~ You’re right, this is really delicious!

Haruka Nanami: Hehe, right? It’s called “Marine Jelly”!

I see Tomo-chan mumbling as she holds her spoon, so I eat one of the sugar shells as well.

The sun shines softly through the window on this beautiful spring day.

Tomo-chan holds the transparent jelly towards the light.

Tomochika Shibuya: So, did Mikaze-senpai contact you afterwards? He’s studying abroad now, right?

Haruka Nanami: He seems to be very busy at the moment so he hasn’t contacted me yet…. But I’m sure he’s doing well!

Tomochika Shibuya: I see. Well, since he seems to be really busy it makes sense that he can’t even contact his own partner.

After the Song Festival I’ve returned to my usual daily life.

About what’s happened…

Mikaze-senpai finished singing and returned backstage, where he collapsed in my arms.

As time passed, all of Senpai’s functions stopped.

He managed to sing my song at his very limit.

The professor came running to us. Because of Senpai's bad physical condition, he was immediately carried away.

At the Song Festival, our song won the first prize.

I successfully managed to become an employee of the agency and debuted as a composer.

According to the official statement "Mikaze-senpai is studying abroad" was what I stuck to. Whether he would return was still uncertain.

Everyone at the Agency was surprised by the sudden news.

Only Shinomiya-san and Syo-kun seemed to have realized what happened and cried with me.

With Senpai, the professor and Aine-san vanished as well. We searched for them in the lab but they were nowhere to be found.

I still don’t know where Mikaze-senpai is.

The president came to me after the Song Festival and only apologized to me with a single “I’m sorry”.

He made an exception and permitted us to become partners without canceling Mikaze-senpai’s contract.

His apology was surely the president’s way of atoning for his failure to prevent so many things from happening.

Fortunately, I received a lot more job offers after my debut. So I tried my best to act normally.

Tomochika Shibuya: I’m glad you seem to be doing fine! I was worried you might feel lonely after Mikaze-senpai’s disappearance.

Haruka Nanami: I’m okay! There's so much to do. Everything's getting serious now that I've debuted.

Tomochika Shibuya: Oh! Spoken like a real adult! My, my, you’ve grown, haven’t you?

Haruka Nanami: I became a professional composer after all! So don’t treat me like a child!

I retort back, but I can’t help but smile at how much Tomo-chan cares for me.

Tomochika Shibuya: Speaking of which, isn’t Mikaze-senpai’s movie about to get released?

Haruka Nanami: Right! I heard they’re doing final editing right now, so it should be done soon!

Tomochika Shibuya: Oh, I’m looking forward to it! I’ll watch it for sure!

Haruka Nanami: Really? Thank you! In that case I’ll send you a ticket!

Mikaze-senpai might be gone, but time kept flowing surely and steadily.

When I went outside, Mikaze-senpai’s song was broadcasted everywhere throughout town.

Senior High School Girl A: Ah! I love this song!

Senior High School Girl B: Me too! You know, I wonder when we’ll get a new song~ It’s about time he releases an album or something.

Matching alongside the melody, those girls started humming the lyrics.

Tomochika Shibuya: Wow, it’s so well received by everyone! That’s great, Haruka!

Tomo-chan chuckles, watching the girls gush about Mikaze-senpai.

Haruka Nanami: Right….

“I’ll watch over you, even when I’m gone.”

Mikaze-senpai’s words ring in my head, realizing that this might be what he meant….

I listen to his voice with these thoughts and a happy heart.

My phone rings.

Haruka Nanami: A call. Wait—it’s from the president!?

W-What could he want?

Shining Saotome: Yeees! This is ME asking YOU for a work related request!!

His voice blasts through the speaker.

Haruka Nanami: O-okay, what is it about??

Shining Saotome: A first version of the movie was finished~

The movie “The Mermaid’s Tears” has been completed and for some reason they’re showing the preview screening today.

Haruka Nanami: Uhm, so it’s today?

As always, that’s too sudden, President.

Shining Saotome: YES! It’s fresh out of the oven! Go and check it out!! YO, better not take your eyes off it until the last minute!

Haruka Nanami: Yes!! Understood!

So the movie is already done but what do I do? I’m not mentally prepared for it yet!

Haruka Nanami: Wha-wha-wha-what should I do, Tomo-chan?? He said the movie’s done so there’s a preview screening and since I was part of the staff I have to go watch it today….

Watching me panic, Tomo-chan shows me a wry smile.

Tomochika Shibuya: Okay, okay! Hurry up and go!

Haruka Nanami: But I really wanted to watch it with you…. Ah, I gotta go!

Tomochika Shibuya: Be careful on your way and watch your step!

Haruka Nanami: I will! Thank you!

I wave behind me as I rush to the train station.

I barely managed to arrive at the screening location on time.

Haruka Nanami: Ah, it has been some time, I’m Nanami.

I saw a familiar staff member and composer so I sat next to them.

Staff A: Yeah, it has been a while. Seems like the movie turned out great.

Haruka Nanami: I see…. I’m excited.

The movie begins.

On that evening, a girl meets a boy singing on the beach.

He is an excellent singer. A boy with eyes the same blue shade as the sea.

That boy is, in reality, the mermaid prince.

He and the girl gets along well. So much, that he often visits her and sing for her.

When the girl talk about her dreams, she mentions that she wants to become a music teacher.

The prince falls in love with the girl, and she also feels the same in return.

As I watch Mikaze-senpai on the big screen, I recall the memories we had together.

The time when we had just met.

The taste of the jelly we ate.

The somewhat funny udon he cooked while taking care of me. Our accidental kiss.

The happening on the Ferris wheel.

Memories of the Christmas Live.

His sparkling eyes while looking at the aquarium.

The day when he told me that he wanted to sing my song, even though it hurt him.

And finally our kiss on the Ferris wheel….

As the time inside the movie passes, the girl grows up to become a woman.

Due to an accident, she loses her sight. She loves to play the piano, but she is unable to do so anymore. Even her dream of becoming a music teacher can't be fulfilled.

In order to recuperate, she returns to her hometown near the ocean.

The mermaid prince and the woman reunite at the beach where they first met.

“I have very fond memories of this ocean. Those days were the happiest of my life,” she says.

“I want to hear that song again” she adds.

Haruka Nanami: And that’s how it’ll end.

If the mermaid prince lets out his voice, the curse of the ocean will turn him into seafoam.

Mermaid Prince: … May you keep smiling and find happiness.

Those are his last words.

He sinks into the ocean, vanishing into countless bubbles, as if melting away.

Mikaze-senpai once mentioned that they don’t show what happens next.

No one knows what happens afterwards.

… At least that’s what I thought.

The ocean appears on screen once again, but this time with no colors—it’s all gray.

Haruka Nanami: The movie… isn’t over?

People start muttering all around me.

Most of the people involved in this film are present—

—yet no one seems to know where this footage came from.

It simply shows a gray ocean on screen.

“Is the projector broken?” someone whispers.

I can hear the sounds of the waves.

Gradually, the gray ocean starts to gain back its color.

The blue of the sky and the blue of the ocean.

Are those white flower petals?

Fluttering like snow, the petals dance over the screen.

That’s when someone dear to me appears in the center.

???: Where could you be? I’m right here.

I dash out of there.

I follow my instincts. My heart is so impatient that I stumble over my own feet.

This hill from which one can see the ocean—this time I’ll pass it down alone.

There he is, facing the sea, singing by himself.

Standing there, singing in front of the sparkling waves, he looks like a prince.

His voice is clear, and echoing like the rippling waves.

I calm my rapid breathing and call out to that person.

Haruka Nanami: …I am here!

He stops singing, slowly turns around, and whispers something to himself.

The ocean breeze is strong.

The loud wind drowns out his answer, but then—

—he stretches out his arms towards me.

A silver bangle sways on his arm.

Those falling flower petals, as fleeting and white as snow, will never disappear again.

I take a firm step on the sandy beach and leap into his arms.

With his comforting arms he catches me firmly.

“I’m home”.

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