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Tugdual are you still alive in the year of 2024
My body is alive, my soul is dead
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@emopreppy (to answer your question on my latest ask)
What is friendship even? I don't think I have any real friends. Friendship requires real understanding, and I don't think anyone can truly grasp the depth of my being. Would I like Gus to really understand me? That's a completely different question.
I would like to kiss him like Judas kissed Jesus. There is intimacy in betrayal. That is what life is all about, isn't it?
#tugdualistsoheißomgg#oksa pollock#oksamaniacs#bigtugdualmood#sometimes a fandom is four people and a therapy placenta
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Why are you fighting with Gus non-stop?
We are not fighting, I am provoking him sometimes and he does not have the mental strength to endure it. And why I’m provoking him? I don’t know. Maybe I’m seeking attention from him. Maybe deep down, there is a part of me that wants him to like me, and my curse of constant self sabotage is again keeping me from what I actually want.
Just. His eyes when he’s angry glare with such beautiful fury, I think I couldn’t stop if I wanted.
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Why do you enjoy role "cruel"?
I wouldn’t say I’m „cruel“, per se. I would say, the world is cruel and I’m oftentimes just mirroring it, which some people will then certainly take as me being cruel. But at the same time, I do take a certain joy in in this process of showing the world it’s own cruelty. So where does this joy come from? I personally think it’s a part of who I am, and I can never possibly escape it.
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I am indeed here.
Because power, lil’ Gracious, represents pure danger. Anyone who isn’t afraid of anything is invulnerable, nothing can stop them. It’s fear that makes men weak. But it’s also fear that makes them men. I mean human.
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I’m not saying I’m happy or unhappy. I just don’t have any great expectations, that’s all.
#oksa pollock#oksamaniacs#tugdualistsoheißomgg#sometimes a fandom is four people and a therapy placenta
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Because power, lil’ Gracious, represents pure danger. Anyone who isn’t afraid of anything is invulnerable, nothing can stop them. It’s fear that makes men weak. But it’s also fear that makes them men. I mean human.
#oksa pollock#oksamaniacs#tugdualistsoheißomgg#sometimes a fandom is four people and a therapy placenta
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And evil too often triumphs over good; it’s sad but that’s the way it is. Only you’re not like the others, I know that too. I realized it immediately, the minute I saw you. And I know how to spot that kind of thing, believe me. You will succeed.
#oksa pollock#oksamaniacs#tugdualistsoheißomgg#sometimes a fandom is four people and a therapy placenta
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No, I’m not unhappy. At least, I don’t think so… I think it’s more that I don’t have a gift for happiness, cheerfulness, all that, you know.
#oksa pollock#oksamaniacs#sometimes a fandom is four people and a therapy placenta#tugdualistsoheißomgg
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#oksa pollock#oksamaniacs#tugdualistsoheißomgg#sometimes a fandom is four people and a therapy placenta#Spotify
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“You’d better shut up!” replied Gus angrily. “After all, we know what you’re capable of, don’t we…”
Tugdual whirled round.
“Is that right? What am I capable of, then?” he asked curtly.
“Well, for starters, what about those daft rituals with your Goth friends sitting round a tasty bowl of soup made from rat and toad offal?” hissed Gus.
Just kiss him, you idiot.
“Well, you said it,” continued Tugdual, “you’re a nobody. No one can say you aren’t perceptive, at least.”
“Aaarghhhh!” screamed Gus, mustering his last reserves of strength to fling himself at Tugdual.
Tugdual seemed to expect this reaction. Far from being surprised, he raised his hand and sent Gus flying to the dusty ground with a perfect Knock-Bong.
Go over there, take his hand and tell him how much you love him.
#oksa pollock#oksamaniacs#sometimes a fandom is four people and a therapy placenta#tugdualistsoheißomgg
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Out of context Oksa Pollock spoiler
youtube
#oksa pollock#oksamaniacs#tugdualistsoheißomgg#sometimes a fandom is four people and a therapy placenta#Youtube
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Sehr gefühlsvolles, trauriges Lied.
https://youtu.be/qSRohpppsnE
youtube
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I just want one happy day. One day without remembering why I am in so much pain. Just one day without this heartache.
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it’s the accuracy for me









Places of Oksa Pollock (1/?): Leomido’s Home
[…] his home, some thirty miles away in the middle of the Welsh countryside. This was no ordinary house, but a former church […]. He’d […] turned it into a magnificent, comfortable home […] the small cemetery extending along the back of the property. Situated in one of the winding lanes along the coastline of the Celtic Sea, [it] was set in vast grounds sheltered by heather-covered valleys.
- Oksa Pollock - The Last Hope
#oksa pollock#pollock places#sometimes a fandom is four people and a therapy placenta#oksamaniacs#leomido
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Take a feeling with great potential for domination like love.
It’s dangerous to surrender to it because it’s so hard to control.
If you can master it, in other words ignore it and go your own sweet way, that’s quite a feat! That kind of inner strength makes you unbeatable.
#oksa pollock#Tugdualistsoheißomgg#oksamaniac#Sometimes a fandom is four people and a therapy plazenta
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ironic how being empty can feel so heavy
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