tulipsandteas

[tulipsandteas]

tinuod gyud diay storya ni papa, dugang ragyud ang mga lalaki sa hunahunaon ug emosyon.

[tulipsandteas]

there's something about forehead kisses, cheek kisses, and stolen kisses at the bus stop, in the middle of the road and outside the gates of my rented room. it's the touch and the way you caress my face when you kiss me.

[tulipsandteas]

we kissed. and then kissed. and kissed

[tulipsandteas]

he was a ray of sunshine, the warmth you feel when you have your first sip of coffee in the morning. a calm one, like your favorite song you listen to when you want to fall asleep.

[tulipsandteas]

i hate u

i hate how u consume my mind. i hate how the thought of you easily slips through my head and i hate how i cannot escape it. i hate how i am like this. i hate it. i just fucking hate it. i don’t want this. dili ko ni kaya. u are everywhere and i hate it. i am confused if this is really an attraction ba or what but just the thought of u makes my heart warm. i smile suddenly and i hate that that is my reaction. i hate it. i hate how giggly i am when i talk to u. i hate how my jaw hurts kaka smile every time we talk. i hate how i try to learn and like the things u like. diko alam why am i like this. i just know my heart’s gonna hurt pero is it wrong to feel this?

[tulipsandteas]

and he fucking did! we’re talking again but friendship level nalang hahahahah

i swear to god, pag kani siya mag message. i’ll combust.

[tulipsandteas]

i swear to god, pag kani siya mag message. i’ll combust.

[tulipsandteas]

i have learnt something new about myself:

i have learnt something new about myself: 

its having to catch feelings when someone knows me well. 

i, for one, is embarrassed by this discovery. it tells a lot about my personality. how i have my walls up--always at the top right where i can’t reach, how i think of which i am not certainly proud of and how i consume each words that were given to me. i think that i am the type to give meaning to everything that even a small friendly gesture makes my heart flutter. of course, i am able to distinguish it when it comes to my friends but to that one stranger trying to know me, talk to me and gives attention to me. 

looking back, as a child i grew up very independent. i was able to do things alone and was fine by my own company. and yet, i was a child. i do not blame my parents for this. they were hustling hard to put food on the table, to provide me clothes and education. but then again, i was a child. this made me realize that it maybe had an effect as to how i navigate my way on my romantic relationships. i was eager for attention and now when someone notices me, i am so grateful and even fluttered (not to the extent of being attention seeker). when someone cares for me, i feel so valued and i view this romantically even if it’s not. this is maybe the reason why i fall in love easily or be in love of the idea of me being in love. 

this should be my priority now, i need to fix it so that my fragile heart won’t shatter again and again by my own expectations and actions. 

[tulipsandteas]

PAWS!

Double tap to high five the beans

[tulipsandteas]

Your soul knows. It will literally tell you when it's time to start a new chapter of your life. Trust it.

[tulipsandteas]

by alexbeckett_

[tulipsandteas]

limoncello

Positano, Italy

[tulipsandteas]

relapse, relapse, relapse :((

[tulipsandteas]

[tulipsandteas]

maybe it’s time to focus on what i really want to achieve. erase all the distractions and just go on head first. 

[tulipsandteas]

and just when i finally made a decision,,,

never would have thought i would cry again. this time, for myself. i am sorry for myself for getting my hopes up. i saw something and decided to shut it all off. i am not ready for another emotionally taxing battles and i don’t have any time for it. i am sad for myself. why did i let myself loose when i know for a fact that it will always be me not winning, me being alone. i figured everything out. 

relapse malala putangina 

[tulipsandteas]

kasia jagodzinska