twola - Tumblr blog

[twola]

Practicing Arthur with charcoal.

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I`ve spent yesterday doing head studies and trying to figure out how to draw Arthur Morgan. It’s fun to see how it progressed from the first one on the top left to the bottom ones on the second page.

[twola]

Mr Morgan

[twola]

hiii! hope you and your family are doing okay!

I'm just curious if you're interested in/plan on playing some other games? like bg3, cyberpunk 2077, tlou, etc... I know your time is very occupied rn, so ofc I don't expect you playing them anytime soon- as I said, I was just curious. 👁️👄👁️

I have played TLOU Part 1. I think on my rotation I have God of War Ragnarok as well. But I def play more in the winter when it’s dark early.

[twola]

Cold mountain air.. an old arthur and hosea wip i had laying around

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[twola]

seeing all the talk about trauma and passerine makes me really wanna add my two cents because i adore your work so much🥹🫶

i haven't read passerine yet (though i probably will, all the talk of the story makes me want to dive into it, though it might be difficult to stomach) but i can understand just how much comfort writing can help you deal with pain and trauma.

while i had not suffered the type of trauma written in passerine (my trauma was verbal/emotional abuse from my dad and unfortunately i saw some things i shouldn't have as a child while he was with my mom) all this talk of pouring your sorrows into writing is really inspiring to me. it makes me want to confront my own issues that i have pushed down for so many years and apply it to my own fanfiction.

thank you so much for being so open, from one girl to another 💞💞

Maybe it’s openness that is one of the first steps to healing. 🫶🏻

[twola]

i have so much love for passerine , as many others do too !!

originally , i stumbled upon your blog after a rough patch in my life . i first read the little blurb , i was hesitant . what could possibly be worse than death ? " i' ve had my fair shares of run ins with it , or close shaves , so what could possibly be worse ? " then i read it , and it genuinely made me cry . not because it disturbed me , but because i could relate to it .

i don' t feel like i should get into the nitty gritty , but in my situation , nobody had offered me comfort . reading passerine , the sections where arthur comforted the reader , being gentle and trying to understand , it' s easily become one of my favorite ongoing arthur x reader fanfics .

i want to thank you for being an amazing storyteller , for handling sensitive topics so eloquently and beautifully . the shame , the fear , the wondering if you still look the same , it' s all spot on , and i think that you are amazing at what you do .

i cannot find the words to express just how much i love reading your works , and how your writing has not only offered comfort to me -- and many others -- but improved my writing , as well as . silly , maybe , but all in all , you' re an amazing writer , and i wanted to try sharing just how much your writing means to people like me . 🤍

🫶🏻

[twola]

passerine is coming at a great point because i hit both one of my lowest and highest points in terms of dealing with that kind of trauma just last night. (told someone about it, but only after getting stupidly drunk on a work night)

i never experienced a situation exactly like that in the fic but the unhealthy coping is EXACTLY me and arthurs comforting is just as healing to me

i took so many screenshots while i was reading, i was literally gasping at things like "do i look different? will they notice?", or being upset about there not even being a scar, you have no idea how healing it is to feel so seen all with the secure distance of a fictional universe.

i could write for ages and ages about passerine you have no idea

I often think that writing, fan fiction, and even video games in general are a kind of coping mechanism. At least they are for me.

When I was figuratively drowning in the wake of my trauma, RDR2 and the fandom was an escape for me. Somewhere I could put energy into that wasn’t my own terrible situation.

CW under the break, because I’m going to get real in a way that women should:

I had a traumatic miscarriage of a very wanted pregnancy when I wrote that first chapter of Passerine. Literally, I wrote most of it in bed recovering from surgery. It was the second miscarriage I had in six months. Throwing myself into the fandom was quite possibly the only thing I could do to not completely lose it. Writing ten thousand words about pain and trauma and trying to heal, well - that was my therapy. That was my screaming into the sky.

I had no scars. I had no visible signs of this trauma. Women don’t talk about shit like this. I felt so goddamn alone. So I turned inward. I wrote a character in this fictional world who suffered and was consoled. Passerine is a cry into the void. What I’m learning is that I’m not so alone. That the cry into the void was heard, and that others hurt in the same way.

[twola]

the passerine snipped took the air out of my lungs set up your ko-fi right now im getting paid in a month

😭

Y’all. Seriously, the love for Passerine amazes me.

I wrote the first chapter as kind of a trauma dump. It was at a really low place in my life and I felt like I needed to channel that energy into something before it ate me alive. While it is not a true reflection (this situation was not SA), it was therapeutic to get a creative piece out addressing trauma and trying to heal and terrible things keep happening to you.

Because of that, sometimes I find it hard to channel that energy back into the story. I’m happy to say my life situation is much better than it was. But it is a labor of love, and I’ve had so many people reach out to me thanking me for exploring those difficult aspects.

I promise that I am giving Passerine the love and gentleness it, and you as readers, deserve.

[twola]

How you been keeping recently? Hope you’ve been able to sleep well n all that 💖

Pretty well! Sleeping as much as a four month old allows 😅

Actually baby is a pretty good sleeper, so I really can’t complain too much! 🙏🏼

[twola]

Now loyalty’s a pistol And my heart is full of holes I’m bleeding out my spirit Breathing out my soul…

[twola]

YOU HAVE A CHILD????

Ha yep!

[twola]

Hi lovely? Would it be possible to get a non spoiler snippet of passerine?

Love you lots and can't wait for the new chapter, take care! 💗

So I really really am trying to get this chapter out tonight, but well, my four month old had other plans 👶

Here is a snippet:

You’ve pulled your knees to your chest and hidden your face in them, ashamed of the tears that spill down your cheeks again.

“I had a son.”

Arthur’s voice is not loud, not strong, not solid. You slowly raise your head, sniffling, to find him sitting with his elbows on his thighs and head hung low, staring at the dirt below his feet.

“…had?”

He nods, still not looking at you, “He ‘nd his mother were killed, long time ago. Robbery.”

You remain quiet, your gaze down to the ground also.

“I wasn’t there.”

You wrap your arms tighter around your legs as another wave of tears cascade down your cheeks.

“Wasn’t there for any of it. Wasn’t there when he was born, barely there as he grew up, wasn’t there when he ‘nd his mother needed my protection.”

[twola]

A pleasant afternoon somewhere southeast of Valentine

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[twola]

are they REAL?