ulrichfoester

[ulrichfoester]

The Often-Overlooked Glue of Long-Term Relationships

Most people know what it feels like in the beginning of a relationship when both of your brains are busy bringing you together, as in the “honeymoon phase.”  Romantic love produces high levels of dopamine, creating euphoric feelings and the resulting behaviors for each other.  You are at the beginning of building emotional safety, putting energy into prioritizing, listening and validating each other.  Your best face is forward in your kindness and attentiveness as you slowly build important trust between you.  You spend a lot of time thinking about each other, and you may feel the warm and fuzzies of a love buzz.

Much have been said about the fact that this phase typically fades. Couples are hopefully left with the aspects of each other that they fell in love with to flow with the ups and downs of life together.  It can be fairly seamless but often not.  If there was an over-focus on the high of early love and not enough insight into the realities of each other, including the less desirable parts, the transition may be a challenge.  As vulnerabilities or “warts” start to reveal themselves, how well do couples adapt?

Back to emotional safety.  With the glow of the “honeymoon” out of sight in the rearview mirror, they need to rely on other connection points.  Ideally, they really enjoy being with each other, have mutual trust and respect and shared relationship goals to positively move ahead.  If they have general good will and a collaborative spirit, they can avoid letting mistakes or life pitfalls cast doubt on their ability to rely on each other.

But what keeps intimate partnerships thriving for the long haul?  Communication, conflict resolution, crisis management ability, finances and views on parenting are some of the few keys but there is one aspect that can be missed.

The little moments are the often-overlooked glue of long-term relationships.

Life goes on.  Days become weeks, become months and then years.  Couples need to adapt to things happening internally and externally in their lives.  But the “little moments” of their ongoing interaction patterns are critical.  The list of these moments can be infinite as people feel loved in different ways but the important thing is that whatever it is for each person in the relationship, that the little moments happen and somewhat regularly.  Here are a few:

Flirtatious glance.

Stroke of the hair.

Ask about their day, with authenticity.

Spontaneous hug.

Text to check in during the work day.

Neck massage while watching tv.

Use of loving nicknames.

Bringing partner coffee.

Kiss or hug at transitions. (hello, goodbye, good morning, good night)

Playful tap on the rear in passing.

If you think back to the beginning of your relationship, many of the above or others may have been happening.  You both probably were very clear that you mattered to each other and felt loved.  It’s natural for some of the more intimate behaviors to drop off over time but all of it dropping off is a red flag.  And for some of you, none have every been there and you may be reflecting on the impact of that.

No matter what is going on in the relationship, the messaging to each other that they are loved and matter is a critical component.  Loving micro-behaviors are unique to each couple and are a thread keeping them connected over time.  Know that people have different levels of need for these so in some cases one may desperately need them to remain connected and for the other it may not be as organic (due likely to earlier experiences and attachment styles).  All of this can get quite complicated and unfortunately, breed resentment and disconnection if not addressed.

Uh oh.  The “glue” is lacking in my relationship.

A lack of out-of-bed intimacy can put the freeze on in-bed intimacy.  For the many who need general intimacy intact to feel well connected, the thought of sex with your partner at this point may literally feel viscerally negative.  The long-term consequences of not having that thread or glue intact can be eroding disconnection originally fueled by a slow burning sense of rejection.

One solution is to ask your partner for what you need.  Even if it’s not natural, they then have the opportunity to create new habits for the sake of your relationship.  Hopefully, they hear and respond to this.  Sometimes it’s just a matter of relationship laziness over a long period of time.

If one or both of you does some of these but the other hasn’t been great at responding positively, try to change this.  The risk is the one doing the behaviors will eventually stop, leaving the relationship even more vulnerable to disconnection, not having the glue it needs to stick together.

If the issue runs deeper as a result of resentment or other unresolved issues, creating an obstacle to the above-mentioned micro-behaviors, seek couples therapy to dig deeper to try to get back on track.

The little things legitimately matter.

The post The Often-Overlooked Glue of Long-Term Relationships first appeared on LoveAndLifeToolBox. The Often-Overlooked Glue of Long-Term Relationships published first on https://familycookwareshop.tumblr.com/

[ulrichfoester]

Awareness is the Key to Change

Stories of Hope: An Interview with Debra Atlas This is part of a series featuring individuals who share their life experiences with mental health issues. Recently, I asked writer and author Debra Atlas about her journey and her recent activities. Here’s our interview: DS: Tell us about when you first started becoming aware of concerns related to your mental health. How did these issues continue to affect you and those around you before you sought treatment? DA: No one suspected ...

Read moreAwareness is the Key to Change

The post Awareness is the Key to Change first appeared on Advocating for Better Mental Health . Awareness is the Key to Change published first on https://familycookwareshop.tumblr.com/

[ulrichfoester]

The Nature Pill: Why Doctors Are Prescribing Time Outdoors

We’ve often heard that getting out in the sun can improve our moods. Scientific evidence supports this idea. Today, physicians are prescribing time in nature to patients, especially those with mental health challenges.

What is this nature pill and how can it help you?

What is the nature pill?

In the wake of COVID-19 lockdowns, doctors saw a surge in people suffering from mental health issues. That’s because spending too much time indoors can cause these challenges. Traditionally, physicians have prescribed medication such as antidepressants for these patients.

However, today a growing number of doctors are handing out a new prescription: the nature pill. They are prescribing time outdoors to people suffering from anxiety, depression, and even obesity. These scripts provide recommendations for simple outdoor activities, including what to do, how often, and when to start.

Why is this trend becoming popular? When doctors advise patients to exercise, they get mixed results. However, when a formal script with nature-based activities is prescribed, patients are more likely to comply.

This trend is not just limited to doctors. Organizations like Park Rx America encourage people with chronic disease to add outdoor activities to their treatment to help patients improve their outlook as they fight disease.

What exactly are the benefits of spending time in nature?

How nature affects mental health

Today, science tells us that just spending time in nature improves our mental health. Psychological research has uncovered multiple benefits:

Green spaces appear to improve attention in students and people in general, compared to urban settings.

Time spent in nature has been linked to better memory skills as well as the ability to process multiple ideas at once. This improves critical thinking skills.

Nature also seems to lift mood, even during dull tasks.

Nature may help people with mental health problems as well. Ecotherapy, that is, a psychological therapy included with time spent outside, benefits people with mild depression. Seasonal affective disorder (SAD) is a condition where people suffer depression at certain times of the year. Spending time in sunlight can often counteract this issue.

Time outside may even reduce harmful psychological behaviors, such as repetitive thoughts. And nature often has a calming effect on people. Excessive screen time, for example, is linked to depression. However, stepping away from your desk for a walk outside can help clear your head.

Spending time outside can benefit your brain, emotions, and mental health. Is it good for your physical health too?

How time in nature can benefit physical health

Nature can benefit our well-being even when we are undergoing medical procedures. One study showed that patients who had a view of trees from their hospital beds coped with post-operative pain better than those who did not. They recovered more rapidly and were sent home sooner.

And time spent in the sun can provide much-needed vitamin D for our bodies too. However, it’s important to keep your sun exposure within safe limits. Use sunscreen, wear sunglasses, and keep covered if you’re going to spend a long time in the sun.

Is the nature pill alternative medicine?

You might be wondering if this nature pill is an alternative medicine remedy. Let’s explore the differences between traditional and alternative medicine.

Traditional medicine is more familiar to most people. It tends to hone in on a specific organ, which is why your general physician may refer you to a specialist. Practitioners are board-certified and able to prescribe pharmaceutical treatments for physical or mental disorders.

Surgery and medical devices are also part of traditional medicine offerings. These also required board-certified surgeons or specialists.

Alternative medicine, on the other hand, typically takes a more holistic approach. The body is viewed as a whole, so illness can be connected to any issue you are having.

Many alternative approaches to medicine have a cultural basis, rather than coming from official scientific certifications. They include:

Chiropractic medicine treats based on the connections of the body’s major structures, such as bones and ligaments.

Biomedical approach using supplements or detox practices.

Treatment through nutrition such as targeted diets.

While traditional medicine is commonly accepted, more people are using alternative medicine. Many people — including physicians — are combining both types of treatments to give patients the best chance of success.

Both traditional and alternative practitioners today are prescribing the nature pill for their patients. With a basis in both science and as a cultural remedy, the great outdoors is a good choice no matter what sort of medicine you choose.

When you can’t access nature

While a hike in the woods is a great way to relieve stress, it’s not a realistic choice much of the time. Whether you are at work or in a lockdown scenario, you may not be able to get outside. And inclement weather will keep you inside as well.

The good news is that research indicates that just viewing or listening to nature seems can have an uplifting effect on mood as well. When you can’t get outdoors, try these solutions:

Use pictures of natural landscapes, on your desk or your screensaver.

Play soothing sounds, such as ocean waves.

Surround yourself with low-maintenance plants and fresh flowers.

Additional ways to improve your mental health

While the nature pill is a great way to improve your mental health, there are other simple changes you can make as well. Exercise, healthy food choices, and a full night’s sleep are good habits you should develop over time.

You should also include mindful living habits such as these:

Mindfulness Try to be more present in the moment. This is especially critical when you are with the people you care about. Often, we are highly distracted by our phones or other tech. Try turning off your phone when you are with others or when you are alone. (It’s ok to be inaccessible for a few hours!)

Gratitude Another excellent way to live mindfully is to practice the art of daily gratitude. Every day, think of three things you are grateful to have in your life. This can be as simple as being thankful that you woke up today! Get into the habit of practicing gratitude at the same time every day to build this habit.

Exposure to nature can help ease physical and mental health challenges brought on by screen time, isolation, and too much time indoors. It’s no wonder that doctors today are prescribing this nature pill. Spending time outside can ease stress, worry, and anxiety and should be part of everyone’s routine.

Are you overwhelmed? Are you concerned about the wellbeing of a loved one who spends all their time behind a screen? Contact Colleen on 0434 337 245 or Duncan on 0434 331 243 for a FREE 10 minute consultation on how we can best help you or book online now.

The post The Nature Pill: Why Doctors Are Prescribing Time Outdoors appeared first on Watersedge Counselling.

The Nature Pill: Why Doctors Are Prescribing Time Outdoors published first on https://familycookwareshop.tumblr.com/

[ulrichfoester]

Your Child’s Attachment Style: How to Recognize It and Work With It

Parenting can be challenging. Children’s behavior can be confusing. An eight-year-old child may angrily insist that you leave them alone. Then, when given the space, the child may only seem to get more sullen. Other children might be prone to protest, engaging in behavior a parent might describe as ”fighting” them all the time. What can help us make sense of how our kids behave, and how can we work with what we learn? Knowing about child attachment styles can be useful in understanding what’s happening when they withdraw or protest. 

Most people, children included, are a combination of attachment styles. This blog will focus on children who may have avoidant and preoccupied tendencies. It’s important to note that most people have predominantly secure attachments. So, if you recognize some avoidant or preoccupied behavior in your little ones, you to not need to be alarmed. Chances are, if you are responsive to your child’s needs, you ultimately have a securely attached child.

What am I doing that will affect my child’s attachment style?

When considering attachment, meeting your child’s needs in a responsive and attuned way is most important. When a child falls and scrapes a knee, it is important that we respond. Picking them up right away can show them that we understand and care about how they feel at that moment. To our surprise, they might become more emotional when we do this.

Some parents see this as their responsiveness making their kids, “worse.” However, we are all built to feel together. So, when we are present to our children’s feelings, their emotions may momentarily flow harder than they were flowing before we picked them up. Our presence enables them to ride the wave of their emotion to its calmer end. How we respond when our children are in need affects the degree to which they securely attach. We can think of this as our parenting attachment style. Are we sensitive and attuned? Or are we dismissive or even hostile towards our children’s vulnerability?

Learn more about trauma and attachment

Screens affect attachment

According to Janet A. Courtney and Eva Nowakowski-Sims, screens can create a separation between infants or children and their caregivers. The more family members are on screens, the less they are engaging in more socially bonding activities. When parents are focused on technology, they are less focused on their children. Researchers have also found that, when a television is on in a home, parents are less attentive to their children. They speak less frequently to them and, when they do speak, they use fewer words.

Home size affects attachment

Dr. Kirk Honda, of the attachment-focused podcast Psychology in Seattle, has pointed out the impact home size has on attachment. Honda cites studies that show modern living, characterized by larger homes boasting a television in every room, is hurting families ability to attach to each other in meaningful ways. In other words, if you’re lucky enough to enjoy a good amount of square footage in your home, it might be a good idea to be extra mindful about togetherness.

How do I identify my child’s attachment style?

Avoidant attachment behavior

Children who display signs of avoidant attachment style crave closeness every bit as much as more emotionally demonstrative kids. These kids cope with past attachment disappointments by shutting down to their needs. This may be your “easy” but slightly aloof ten-year-old. They may come home from school and promptly engages with an ipad or video game. Despite this behavior, they are actually dying to feel close to you.

Knowing this could help you figure out a way to be closer with them. You may be overly respectful of their demand for more and more space. On the contrast, you may bust through their boundaries with no regard for them. A healthier alternative is to be more aware of their subtle bids for connection that you may have been missing. You may want to pause and ask yourself, “now that my child is older and looking to connect with me differently than she did when she was two, what does that attempt to connect look like?”

Preoccupied attachment behavior

Whether our children are avoidant or preoccupied, our work is to attune to their bids for connection, which happen long before their outbursts or withdrawals. Preoccupied kids have found that, in order to garner a desired parental response to their needs, they must intensify their behavior, feelings, demands and rebellions. If your child leans toward preoccupation, they are more likely to protest loudly.

Bids for connection

Looking for the subtle ways our children attempt to connect with us sets us on track for addressing behavioral issues at their core. So often, parents focus on the behavior they would like to see less of, rather than the four hours before that behavior. When the child feels disconnected from their secure base, that sets the stage for their protest. Even if you’re constantly thinking about your child’s well-being, you may not be attuning to them. If we are interested in the concept of attachment, our job as parents is to be incredibly sensitive and relentless detectives for the ways in which our children feel seen, known, safe and – importantly – delighted in.

I recently observed a change in my seven-year old’s slightly avoidant behavior. At one point I realized his love language had shifted from cuddling, to long, detailed conversations about Pokemon. Knowing this, I made a concerted effort to really listen to him. He rattled off various statistics and descriptions of imagined creatures plastered on overpriced cards. Lo and behold, he eventually emerged from underneath his blanket and set down his iPad, enthusiastically looking to connect.

How do I work with my child’s attachment style?

Here’s the good news: regardless of whether or not your child is secure-avoidant or secure-preoccupied, a little attunement goes a long way. The best way to address the holes in our attachment to our kids is to pay attention to what they are feeling, accurately recognize their emotions and show them that we see what they’re feeling. Parents often become distracted by the content of what their children throw at them without recognizing the story underneath. Relationships are truly experienced beneath the surface and it is there that parents can most effectively connect with their kids. 

Consider this the next time your eight-year-old refuses to sit at the dinner table. Rather than getting sucked into the power-struggle, get curious about the feelings that are driving that protest. How many tiny attempts to be seen, heard, known, or emotionally held and felt might you have innocently missed? Not only could you begin to notice the days that led up to the problem, you could say, “wow, the idea of sitting at the dinner table is making you miserable right now. I can see it in your face. Would you say more about it? I’m listening.” This approach may seem ridiculous to a parent who has been in a years-long conflict with a headstrong child. However, accurately noticing, reflecting, and being emotionally available in the face of your children’s emotional world can have powerful outcomes. 

Read more about patterns in relationships

Are you interested in exploring how attachment styles impact your relationships with your children or other people in your life? Working with a therapist is a great way to raise your awareness of attachment behaviors. Reach out to myTherapyNYC today!

Can you think of a time your child may have been trying to connect with you that you missed? Join the conversation in the comments below!

The post Your Child’s Attachment Style: How to Recognize It and Work With It appeared first on myTherapyNYC - Counseling & Wellness.

Your Child’s Attachment Style: How to Recognize It and Work With It published first on https://familycookwareshop.tumblr.com/

[ulrichfoester]

Your Child’s Attachment Style: How to Recognize It and Work With It

Parenting can be challenging. Children’s behavior can be confusing. An eight-year-old child may angrily insist that you leave them alone. Then, when given the space, the child may only seem to get more sullen. Other children might be prone to protest, engaging in behavior a parent might describe as ”fighting” them all the time. What can help us make sense of how our kids behave, and how can we work with what we learn? Knowing about child attachment styles can be useful in understanding what’s happening when they withdraw or protest. 

Most people, children included, are a combination of attachment styles. This blog will focus on children who may have avoidant and preoccupied tendencies. It’s important to note that most people have predominantly secure attachments. So, if you recognize some avoidant or preoccupied behavior in your little ones, you to not need to be alarmed. Chances are, if you are responsive to your child’s needs, you ultimately have a securely attached child.

What am I doing that will affect my child’s attachment style?

When considering attachment, meeting your child’s needs in a responsive and attuned way is most important. When a child falls and scrapes a knee, it is important that we respond. Picking them up right away can show them that we understand and care about how they feel at that moment. To our surprise, they might become more emotional when we do this.

Some parents see this as their responsiveness making their kids, “worse.” However, we are all built to feel together. So, when we are present to our children’s feelings, their emotions may momentarily flow harder than they were flowing before we picked them up. Our presence enables them to ride the wave of their emotion to its calmer end. How we respond when our children are in need affects the degree to which they securely attach. We can think of this as our parenting attachment style. Are we sensitive and attuned? Or are we dismissive or even hostile towards our children’s vulnerability?

Learn more about trauma and attachment

Screens affect attachment

According to Janet A. Courtney and Eva Nowakowski-Sims, screens can create a separation between infants or children and their caregivers. The more family members are on screens, the less they are engaging in more socially bonding activities. When parents are focused on technology, they are less focused on their children. Researchers have also found that, when a television is on in a home, parents are less attentive to their children. They speak less frequently to them and, when they do speak, they use fewer words.

Home size affects attachment

Dr. Kirk Honda, of the attachment-focused podcast Psychology in Seattle, has pointed out the impact home size has on attachment. Honda cites studies that show modern living, characterized by larger homes boasting a television in every room, is hurting families ability to attach to each other in meaningful ways. In other words, if you’re lucky enough to enjoy a good amount of square footage in your home, it might be a good idea to be extra mindful about togetherness.

How do I identify my child’s attachment style?

Avoidant attachment behavior

Children who display signs of avoidant attachment style crave closeness every bit as much as more emotionally demonstrative kids. These kids cope with past attachment disappointments by shutting down to their needs. This may be your “easy” but slightly aloof ten-year-old. They may come home from school and promptly engages with an ipad or video game. Despite this behavior, they are actually dying to feel close to you.

Knowing this could help you figure out a way to be closer with them. You may be overly respectful of their demand for more and more space. On the contrast, you may bust through their boundaries with no regard for them. A healthier alternative is to be more aware of their subtle bids for connection that you may have been missing. You may want to pause and ask yourself, “now that my child is older and looking to connect with me differently than she did when she was two, what does that attempt to connect look like?”

Preoccupied attachment behavior

Whether our children are avoidant or preoccupied, our work is to attune to their bids for connection, which happen long before their outbursts or withdrawals. Preoccupied kids have found that, in order to garner a desired parental response to their needs, they must intensify their behavior, feelings, demands and rebellions. If your child leans toward preoccupation, they are more likely to protest loudly.

Bids for connection

Looking for the subtle ways our children attempt to connect with us sets us on track for addressing behavioral issues at their core. So often, parents focus on the behavior they would like to see less of, rather than the four hours before that behavior. When the child feels disconnected from their secure base, that sets the stage for their protest. Even if you’re constantly thinking about your child’s well-being, you may not be attuning to them. If we are interested in the concept of attachment, our job as parents is to be incredibly sensitive and relentless detectives for the ways in which our children feel seen, known, safe and – importantly – delighted in.

I recently observed a change in my seven-year old’s slightly avoidant behavior. At one point I realized his love language had shifted from cuddling, to long, detailed conversations about Pokemon. Knowing this, I made a concerted effort to really listen to him. He rattled off various statistics and descriptions of imagined creatures plastered on overpriced cards. Lo and behold, he eventually emerged from underneath his blanket and set down his iPad, enthusiastically looking to connect.

How do I work with my child’s attachment style?

Here’s the good news: regardless of whether or not your child is secure-avoidant or secure-preoccupied, a little attunement goes a long way. The best way to address the holes in our attachment to our kids is to pay attention to what they are feeling, accurately recognize their emotions and show them that we see what they’re feeling. Parents often become distracted by the content of what their children throw at them without recognizing the story underneath. Relationships are truly experienced beneath the surface and it is there that parents can most effectively connect with their kids. 

Consider this the next time your eight-year-old refuses to sit at the dinner table. Rather than getting sucked into the power-struggle, get curious about the feelings that are driving that protest. How many tiny attempts to be seen, heard, known, or emotionally held and felt might you have innocently missed? Not only could you begin to notice the days that led up to the problem, you could say, “wow, the idea of sitting at the dinner table is making you miserable right now. I can see it in your face. Would you say more about it? I’m listening.” This approach may seem ridiculous to a parent who has been in a years-long conflict with a headstrong child. However, accurately noticing, reflecting, and being emotionally available in the face of your children’s emotional world can have powerful outcomes. 

Read more about patterns in relationships

Are you interested in exploring how attachment styles impact your relationships with your children or other people in your life? Working with a therapist is a great way to raise your awareness of attachment behaviors. Reach out to myTherapyNYC today!

Can you think of a time your child may have been trying to connect with you that you missed? Join the conversation in the comments below!

The post Your Child’s Attachment Style: How to Recognize It and Work With It appeared first on myTherapyNYC - Counseling & Wellness.

Your Child’s Attachment Style: How to Recognize It and Work With It published first on https://familycookwareshop.tumblr.com/

[ulrichfoester]

Your Child’s Attachment Style: How to Recognize It and Work With It

Parenting can be challenging. Children’s behavior can be confusing. An eight-year-old child may angrily insist that you leave them alone. Then, when given the space, the child may only seem to get more sullen. Other children might be prone to protest, engaging in behavior a parent might describe as ”fighting” them all the time. What can help us make sense of how our kids behave, and how can we work with what we learn? Knowing about child attachment styles can be useful in understanding what’s happening when they withdraw or protest. 

Most people, children included, are a combination of attachment styles. This blog will focus on children who may have avoidant and preoccupied tendencies. It’s important to note that most people have predominantly secure attachments. So, if you recognize some avoidant or preoccupied behavior in your little ones, you to not need to be alarmed. Chances are, if you are responsive to your child’s needs, you ultimately have a securely attached child.

What am I doing that will affect my child’s attachment style?

When considering attachment, meeting your child’s needs in a responsive and attuned way is most important. When a child falls and scrapes a knee, it is important that we respond. Picking them up right away can show them that we understand and care about how they feel at that moment. To our surprise, they might become more emotional when we do this.

Some parents see this as their responsiveness making their kids, “worse.” However, we are all built to feel together. So, when we are present to our children’s feelings, their emotions may momentarily flow harder than they were flowing before we picked them up. Our presence enables them to ride the wave of their emotion to its calmer end. How we respond when our children are in need affects the degree to which they securely attach. We can think of this as our parenting attachment style. Are we sensitive and attuned? Or are we dismissive or even hostile towards our children’s vulnerability?

Learn more about trauma and attachment

Screens affect attachment

According to Janet A. Courtney and Eva Nowakowski-Sims, screens can create a separation between infants or children and their caregivers. The more family members are on screens, the less they are engaging in more socially bonding activities. When parents are focused on technology, they are less focused on their children. Researchers have also found that, when a television is on in a home, parents are less attentive to their children. They speak less frequently to them and, when they do speak, they use fewer words.

Home size affects attachment

Dr. Kirk Honda, of the attachment-focused podcast Psychology in Seattle, has pointed out the impact home size has on attachment. Honda cites studies that show modern living, characterized by larger homes boasting a television in every room, is hurting families ability to attach to each other in meaningful ways. In other words, if you’re lucky enough to enjoy a good amount of square footage in your home, it might be a good idea to be extra mindful about togetherness.

How do I identify my child’s attachment style?

Avoidant attachment behavior

Children who display signs of avoidant attachment style crave closeness every bit as much as more emotionally demonstrative kids. These kids cope with past attachment disappointments by shutting down to their needs. This may be your “easy” but slightly aloof ten-year-old. They may come home from school and promptly engages with an ipad or video game. Despite this behavior, they are actually dying to feel close to you.

Knowing this could help you figure out a way to be closer with them. You may be overly respectful of their demand for more and more space. On the contrast, you may bust through their boundaries with no regard for them. A healthier alternative is to be more aware of their subtle bids for connection that you may have been missing. You may want to pause and ask yourself, “now that my child is older and looking to connect with me differently than she did when she was two, what does that attempt to connect look like?”

Preoccupied attachment behavior

Whether our children are avoidant or preoccupied, our work is to attune to their bids for connection, which happen long before their outbursts or withdrawals. Preoccupied kids have found that, in order to garner a desired parental response to their needs, they must intensify their behavior, feelings, demands and rebellions. If your child leans toward preoccupation, they are more likely to protest loudly.

Bids for connection

Looking for the subtle ways our children attempt to connect with us sets us on track for addressing behavioral issues at their core. So often, parents focus on the behavior they would like to see less of, rather than the four hours before that behavior. When the child feels disconnected from their secure base, that sets the stage for their protest. Even if you’re constantly thinking about your child’s well-being, you may not be attuning to them. If we are interested in the concept of attachment, our job as parents is to be incredibly sensitive and relentless detectives for the ways in which our children feel seen, known, safe and – importantly – delighted in.

I recently observed a change in my seven-year old’s slightly avoidant behavior. At one point I realized his love language had shifted from cuddling, to long, detailed conversations about Pokemon. Knowing this, I made a concerted effort to really listen to him. He rattled off various statistics and descriptions of imagined creatures plastered on overpriced cards. Lo and behold, he eventually emerged from underneath his blanket and set down his iPad, enthusiastically looking to connect.

How do I work with my child’s attachment style?

Here’s the good news: regardless of whether or not your child is secure-avoidant or secure-preoccupied, a little attunement goes a long way. The best way to address the holes in our attachment to our kids is to pay attention to what they are feeling, accurately recognize their emotions and show them that we see what they’re feeling. Parents often become distracted by the content of what their children throw at them without recognizing the story underneath. Relationships are truly experienced beneath the surface and it is there that parents can most effectively connect with their kids. 

Consider this the next time your eight-year-old refuses to sit at the dinner table. Rather than getting sucked into the power-struggle, get curious about the feelings that are driving that protest. How many tiny attempts to be seen, heard, known, or emotionally held and felt might you have innocently missed? Not only could you begin to notice the days that led up to the problem, you could say, “wow, the idea of sitting at the dinner table is making you miserable right now. I can see it in your face. Would you say more about it? I’m listening.” This approach may seem ridiculous to a parent who has been in a years-long conflict with a headstrong child. However, accurately noticing, reflecting, and being emotionally available in the face of your children’s emotional world can have powerful outcomes. 

Read more about patterns in relationships

Are you interested in exploring how attachment styles impact your relationships with your children or other people in your life? Working with a therapist is a great way to raise your awareness of attachment behaviors. Reach out to myTherapyNYC today!

Can you think of a time your child may have been trying to connect with you that you missed? Join the conversation in the comments below!

The post Your Child’s Attachment Style: How to Recognize It and Work With It appeared first on myTherapyNYC - Counseling & Wellness.

Your Child’s Attachment Style: How to Recognize It and Work With It published first on https://familycookwareshop.tumblr.com/

[ulrichfoester]

I Want to Be Alone

What do you do when your loved one says, “I just want to be alone?”

It was screen acting legend Greta Garbo who became famous for her line, “I want to be alone.” All of us at one time or another have a desire to spend some quiet time alone. Whether it’s to gather our thoughts, to relax, or to just not have to interact, alone time can be wonderful.

Wanting to be alone all the time is a very different issue. Someone who desires to isolate from others for a prolonged period, say weeks, is struggling with a mental health challenge. It is a sign that they need some emotional support of some kind, so it should not be ignored.

Why Does Someone Want to Be Alone?

Human beings are very social animals. We enjoy hanging out with friends, relatives, and colleagues. We thrive on interacting with others, on doing life together. So why would someone decide that they want to be left alone? Why would they choose to spend their time in solitude?

Of course, there are times when we all could use a brief timeout from socializing. Sometimes a little alone time is just what we need. The same holds true for those periods when we are navigating a loss or a setback, or when we are ill. Quiet time is preferred in those instances when you are feeling down and not up to chatting.

The desire to be alone becomes a concern when there is no life event or illness that would explain it. In this case, a mental health issue could be the culprit. In fact, there are several mental health disorders that feature withdrawing socially and isolating behaviors as a common symptom.

Isolating is a Mental Health Disorder Symptom

When someone you care about becomes a recluse by choice, it is right to be concerned about them. Many times this desire to be alone all the time is a sign of mental distress. Maybe you and others have tried to visit the person but your requests are rebuffed. If this is the case, it is time to guide them to a mental health expert who can evaluate them.

Mental health disorders that feature isolating behaviors:

Social anxiety. Social anxiety features an intense fear of being judged or embarrassed in public. To avoid this perceived possibility, someone struggling with social anxiety often isolates from others.

Panic disorder. Panic disorder features unpredictable, sporadic panic attacks that feel much like having a heart attack. Someone with panic disorder fears having the next one, and isolates to avoid anything that could trigger a panic attack.

Phobia. Some types of phobias lead to isolating behaviors. Agoraphobia is one such phobia in which the person fears being unable to escape a building or crowded venue. As a way to avoid this from occurring they will just stay home.

Depression. Depression symptoms often include persistent low mood and feelings of guilt and shame. Someone suffering from depression may not have the desire or energy to try to be social and will isolate instead.

Personality Disorder. Some personality disorders, like borderline or avoidant, cause the person to have trouble with relating or bonding with people. They may lack self-confidence or have poorly developed social skills. This may lead to social isolation.

How Isolation Harms Mental Health

Isolation can take a toll on our mental and physical health. In fact, it has been shown that people who live all alone or have few sources of social interaction don’t live as long. We need that human exchange for optimum wellness. Some of the ways isolation harms wellness may include:

Physical health effects. Because of the tight connection between mind and body, it makes sense that when one area of our being is compromised the other will be impacted as well. When people don’t have social time with loved ones it can lead to feelings of loneliness or abandonment. The psychological effects of isolation seep into our physical health, causing heart disease and stroke.

Poor sleep quality. People who are isolating report having trouble sleeping. They have more restless sleep, or struggle to sleep enough hours to feel refreshed in the morning. This can result in foggy thinking, irritability, and fatigue during the day.

Cognitive issues. Among the elderly, loneliness can lead to a faster decline in cognitive functioning. This happens because the person is not interacting with others, not sharing and conversing, which can lead to a decline in memory and diminished cognitive processing.

Substance abuse. People who isolate may fill the void with a substance. A substance is used to self-medicate or to numb their feelings of boredom or loneliness.

Psychosis. One of the more severe outcomes from isolating are the symptoms of psychosis. These symptoms of mental illness include hallucinations, delusions, and paranoid thoughts.

Getting Help for Someone Who Wants to Be Alone

Helping someone break out of isolation requires psychiatric support. Treatment for a mental health disorder will involve three prongs: medication, therapy, and holistic methods.

Meds: The drug will be based on the exact diagnosis. These can bring relief of the symptoms caused by the mental health issue. This helps the person to feel more comfortable out in public spaces or at social events.

Therapy: Evidence-based therapies, like CBT, exposure therapy, and mindfulness-based cognitive therapy, can help break the thought distortions. EMDR and exposure therapy can help reduce the fear response.

Holistic: Learning ways to reduce anxiety can help someone get out of their isolation and begin mixing again. These might include mindfulness, deep breathing techniques, and guided meditation.

Does your loved one tell you, “I want to be alone?” Do they isolate in their room or house, not wanting any social interaction? These are signs of distress that can be addressed and managed through treatment. Get help today.

The Treatment Specialist Provides Mental Health Resources

The Treatment Specialist is an online resource for informative articles on mental health conditions and treatment options for adults, teens, and families. If you or a loved one is isolating socially, help is available. Reach out to us today at (866) 644-7911.

The post I Want to Be Alone appeared first on The Treatment Specialist.

I Want to Be Alone published first on https://familycookwareshop.tumblr.com/

[ulrichfoester]

I Want to Be Alone

What do you do when your loved one says, “I just want to be alone?”

It was screen acting legend Greta Garbo who became famous for her line, “I want to be alone.” All of us at one time or another have a desire to spend some quiet time alone. Whether it’s to gather our thoughts, to relax, or to just not have to interact, alone time can be wonderful.

Wanting to be alone all the time is a very different issue. Someone who desires to isolate from others for a prolonged period, say weeks, is struggling with a mental health challenge. It is a sign that they need some emotional support of some kind, so it should not be ignored.

Why Does Someone Want to Be Alone?

Human beings are very social animals. We enjoy hanging out with friends, relatives, and colleagues. We thrive on interacting with others, on doing life together. So why would someone decide that they want to be left alone? Why would they choose to spend their time in solitude?

Of course, there are times when we all could use a brief timeout from socializing. Sometimes a little alone time is just what we need. The same holds true for those periods when we are navigating a loss or a setback, or when we are ill. Quiet time is preferred in those instances when you are feeling down and not up to chatting.

The desire to be alone becomes a concern when there is no life event or illness that would explain it. In this case, a mental health issue could be the culprit. In fact, there are several mental health disorders that feature withdrawing socially and isolating behaviors as a common symptom.

Isolating is a Mental Health Disorder Symptom

When someone you care about becomes a recluse by choice, it is right to be concerned about them. Many times this desire to be alone all the time is a sign of mental distress. Maybe you and others have tried to visit the person but your requests are rebuffed. If this is the case, it is time to guide them to a mental health expert who can evaluate them.

Mental health disorders that feature isolating behaviors:

Social anxiety. Social anxiety features an intense fear of being judged or embarrassed in public. To avoid this perceived possibility, someone struggling with social anxiety often isolates from others.

Panic disorder. Panic disorder features unpredictable, sporadic panic attacks that feel much like having a heart attack. Someone with panic disorder fears having the next one, and isolates to avoid anything that could trigger a panic attack.

Phobia. Some types of phobias lead to isolating behaviors. Agoraphobia is one such phobia in which the person fears being unable to escape a building or crowded venue. As a way to avoid this from occurring they will just stay home.

Depression. Depression symptoms often include persistent low mood and feelings of guilt and shame. Someone suffering from depression may not have the desire or energy to try to be social and will isolate instead.

Personality Disorder. Some personality disorders, like borderline or avoidant, cause the person to have trouble with relating or bonding with people. They may lack self-confidence or have poorly developed social skills. This may lead to social isolation.

How Isolation Harms Mental Health

Isolation can take a toll on our mental and physical health. In fact, it has been shown that people who live all alone or have few sources of social interaction don’t live as long. We need that human exchange for optimum wellness. Some of the ways isolation harms wellness may include:

Physical health effects. Because of the tight connection between mind and body, it makes sense that when one area of our being is compromised the other will be impacted as well. When people don’t have social time with loved ones it can lead to feelings of loneliness or abandonment. The psychological effects of isolation seep into our physical health, causing heart disease and stroke.

Poor sleep quality. People who are isolating report having trouble sleeping. They have more restless sleep, or struggle to sleep enough hours to feel refreshed in the morning. This can result in foggy thinking, irritability, and fatigue during the day.

Cognitive issues. Among the elderly, loneliness can lead to a faster decline in cognitive functioning. This happens because the person is not interacting with others, not sharing and conversing, which can lead to a decline in memory and diminished cognitive processing.

Substance abuse. People who isolate may fill the void with a substance. A substance is used to self-medicate or to numb their feelings of boredom or loneliness.

Psychosis. One of the more severe outcomes from isolating are the symptoms of psychosis. These symptoms of mental illness include hallucinations, delusions, and paranoid thoughts.

Getting Help for Someone Who Wants to Be Alone

Helping someone break out of isolation requires psychiatric support. Treatment for a mental health disorder will involve three prongs: medication, therapy, and holistic methods.

Meds: The drug will be based on the exact diagnosis. These can bring relief of the symptoms caused by the mental health issue. This helps the person to feel more comfortable out in public spaces or at social events.

Therapy: Evidence-based therapies, like CBT, exposure therapy, and mindfulness-based cognitive therapy, can help break the thought distortions. EMDR and exposure therapy can help reduce the fear response.

Holistic: Learning ways to reduce anxiety can help someone get out of their isolation and begin mixing again. These might include mindfulness, deep breathing techniques, and guided meditation.

Does your loved one tell you, “I want to be alone?” Do they isolate in their room or house, not wanting any social interaction? These are signs of distress that can be addressed and managed through treatment. Get help today.

The Treatment Specialist Provides Mental Health Resources

The Treatment Specialist is an online resource for informative articles on mental health conditions and treatment options for adults, teens, and families. If you or a loved one is isolating socially, help is available. Reach out to us today at (866) 644-7911.

The post I Want to Be Alone appeared first on The Treatment Specialist.

I Want to Be Alone published first on https://familycookwareshop.tumblr.com/

[ulrichfoester]

3 money habits to discuss with your partner

For better or worse, money effects families. And often, stress related to money can cause dysfunction in relationships. As part of our Money and families series, , financial consultant Robert McMillen is sharing part two of his expertise with us.

3 money habits to discuss with your partner

It’s one thing to have financial goals and ideals, but if you’re not on the same page as your partner, you won’t meet them. That’s why it is crucial to talk about these money habits together. Following these habits will give you both accountability and structure as you work together.

While you may have big financial goals, the key to achieving them is practicing modest, daily money habits. Here are three money habits that will reduce financial stress, save energy and help you build your financial stability together.

Money habit 1: Lend and borrow carefully

Rather than going through more traditional routes, such as borrowing money from a bank or other financial institution, people are turning to relatives and friends for help. When someone you know is in a financial bind, lending money to relatives and friends might be a nice gesture, but it can be awkward it results in disputes or financial problems.

Before you say yes, consider your own financial situation. You could be asked for a loan, but if you have no safety net, you are unable to pay for unexpected expenses; don’t have enough credit history to get a personal loan or a line of credit; or may need the financial security due to sickness or job loss. Talk about these factors with your partner and come to a decision together.

If lending money, you should be careful about who you lend to. Limiting loans to friends or family members you trust to pay back will save you money and time. Figuring these things our early could also save you friendships in the long run.

Money habit 2: Plan your purchases in advance

Instead of rushing to the supermarket for a few products here and there, organise your shopping excursions ahead of time. Make a list of everything you want to buy and how much you want to spend. You’ll be better at avoiding impulsive purchases and picking up goods you don’t actually need if you make a list and adhere to it.

The same is true for internet purchases. Determine what you truly require, how much you can afford, and wait at least a few days before purchasing. If the item isn’t absolutely necessary, wait 30 days before adding it to your cart.

In any healthy relationship, each partner has a certain level of trust and flexibility with one another. This is also true of mutual finances. So, discuss what expenses, or what amount of money, is available to you both without checking in on each other. Also decide on this price range or amount of money available before hand, and make sure it is equal and proportionate to each other and your family’s costs.

You may also consider setting a specific cost amount, so if either of you want to purchase something at or above this price, you promise to check in with each other first.

Money habit 3: Make a budget and review it

It’s critical to not just make a budget, but also to stick to it. This goes above and beyond simply keeping track of your spending. Instead, you’ll have to think about how you spend your money and seek methods to save money on your outgoing expenses.

Begin with a daily examination, and look through your budget to remind yourself how much money you have to spend in each area.

Then, once a week, spend 30 minutes doing a bigger budget review, in which you look at the overall picture of where you’re spending your money and evaluate if you’ve been keeping to your plan.

When it comes to saving money, various families have different priorities, so it’s vital to figure out which savings objectives are most important to you. Choosing how long you can wait to save for a goal and how much you want to put aside each month to help you achieve it is a part of this process. As you go through this process for all of your goals, prioritise them and set money aside in your monthly budget accordingly. Keep in mind that choosing priorities entails making decisions. If you want to focus on retirement savings, certain other goals may have to take a back seat while you make sure you meet your main priorities.

Families have different methods for who oversees the finances. You may prefer one partner takes care of it (especially if they have a knack for finances!) or may opt to do it together. Irrespective, make sure you both have equal access to the finances and financial records, and stay transparent with each other about it. Finances can be challenging, but by keeping communication open and honest, they can help you build a future together.

Read Part 1 in our Money and Families series ‘7 Money-Saving Tips for Young Families’ here.

Is your family splintering from stress? Do you need support to get on the same page and have open communication? Contact Colleen on 0434 337 245 or Duncan on 0434 331 243 for a FREE 10 minute consultation on how we can best help you or book online now.

The post 3 money habits to discuss with your partner appeared first on Watersedge Counselling.

3 money habits to discuss with your partner published first on https://familycookwareshop.tumblr.com/

[ulrichfoester]

Why Your Therapist Will Likely Not Give You Advice

Therapy is not magic nor is it a process where a therapist is able to “fix” you.  I  sometimes joke with clients that if I had a magic wand under my chair (or on my desk in times of tele-therapy), I could wave it and all would be better.  This certainly would make therapy go faster, wouldn’t it?  Alas, this is not the case. But it’s true that many come to therapy with some preconceived notions of what the process entails and one of the most common fantasies is that their therapist will give them advice.

“Just tell me what to do!”

It’s not to say that there are not therapists out there regularly dispensing advice as I believe there are.  But for those who see themselves as a guide for growth and personal empowerment for their clients,  they will refrain.  There are plenty of good reasons why your therapist will likely not give you advice.

Your therapist is not you.

As much as your therapist delves into the intricacies, characters and emotional waves of your life, they are not in that life.  You share a sacred space together to do your work but he or she is not walking in the footsteps of your day to day.

Your therapist is not wiser than you.  

Another common misconception is that therapists have perfect mistake-free lives and surely must be more wise.  This is not true.  Therapists are humans too and can have similar challenges.  Keep in mind it also can be much easier to guide another person than see through your own forest.  Yes, therapists train to hold their professions and likely know more than you about relationship dynamics, depression, anxiety, trauma and the impact of family of origin issues but they are not inherently wiser.  You are also wise but may simply need help tapping into your own inner wisdom.

Your therapist probably seeks to empower you.

Whatever obstacles have been standing in the way of you creating the positive change you seek, you are in therapy to identify and understand your blocks then move towards their resolution.  The most powerful work happens when you meet all of those markers, your sense of self strengthening along the way.  This road to personal empowerment can’t happen if the therapist gives you all of “the answers” or tells you what to do.

Advice giving is not therapy.

The work of psychotherapy involves training around the complexities of human behavior, need for emotional safety, brain science and many therapeutic modalities that therapists use in their toolbox.  Some are loyal to one paradigm and others more eclectic.  The bottom line is that it’s a journey taken together between therapist and client where trust is established in order for the deeper work to begin.  It is not meant to be a bandaid only but ideally triggering lifelong changes.

***

If you’re in therapy or considering it and hoping to get advice, that’s ok.  You’re not the only one.  When I’m asked for advice, I always remind them of the importance of coming to their own conclusions. But of course I will hope to help guide them to that place.   Therapists have a unique vantage point in their close knowledge of their clients without the emotional entanglements of literally being in their lives.  They are trained to see seek to understand your whole picture with curiosity, gently leading you to your own conclusions.

***

If you’re in anywhere in California, learn more about my California Online Therapy and Counseling practice.  If you’re outside of California, I also provide one-time consultations for specific issues that are psycho-educational and not to be considered psychotherapy.

The post Why Your Therapist Will Likely Not Give You Advice first appeared on LoveAndLifeToolBox. Why Your Therapist Will Likely Not Give You Advice published first on https://familycookwareshop.tumblr.com/

[ulrichfoester]

Using the Healthy Mind Platter to Improve Mental Wellness [Video]

Using the Healthy Mind Platter to Improve Mental Wellness [Transcript]

Today I’m going to talk to you about the Healthy Mind Platter that was created by Dr. Dan Siegel. The Healthy Mind Platter falls under one of the eight dimensions of holistic wellness. It falls under mental wellness. As a psychotherapist, I often think about emotions when it comes to mental wellness. The Healthy Mind Platter is also hitting on a different part of mental wellness. It’s all about recharging your brain and giving it the fuel it needs to work at its best. This allows you to be able to focus as well as recharge and reboot. It’s an opportunity to create connections so you can expand, grow, and be the abundant person that you are.

Focus Time

Focus Time is the time where you are doing your goal-oriented tasks for the day. This includes responsibilities in your personal life or responsibilities at work. Before you even start doing your work for the day, I often recommend writing out a list of must-do tasks. Once you do this, you can prioritize your list from most important to least. Next to that, write an estimated time of how long you need for each item to get done. Then you have an estimated time so you know when to take a break. This allows your brain to focus on the activity, instead of feeling like the workday is never ending.

Read more about how to increase your productivity

Connecting Time

Maybe after those five minutes of focusing on a task, check in with yourself and see how you’re connecting with your work and how you’re connecting with your day. During Connecting Time, it’s really important that we’re making connections with our authentic selves, with our relationships, or even with the world around us. One thing I really liked to do during Connecting Time is to go outside on a walk and talk to a friend on the phone. Since it’s always great to have an actual in-person connection, you can even ask the friend to come with you on a walk. During that time, you are connecting with your friend, you’re connecting with yourself, and you’re connecting with the world around you. And that’s exactly what Connecting Time is.

Play Time

This is my favorite. Play Time is when we are just reconnecting with our younger selves and doing things that we enjoy, just because we enjoy it. We want to engage in playful behavior, be silly, and be creative. So maybe as a child, you loved to draw or paint. That’s a beautiful activity for Play Time. Anything that creates a sense of joy and fulfillment in your life recharges your brain.

Physical Time

Physical Time is when we’re releasing energy, especially after Focus Time. So this could look like taking a few minutes just to do jumping jacks. You could also move your body in yoga or go out and exercise in the gym. This literally could just be a minute long — anything to exchange, recharge, and expel the energy from the long day. This actually leads into our next step, which is Sleep Time. It is really important that we have Physical Time to exude the energy from the day, which will make it a little bit easier at night to fall asleep.

Sleep Time

During Sleep Time, your brain is recharging. This allows you to make connections from the day and integrate what you were learning all day or taking in. My clients have shared that it can be really hard to fall asleep or wake up feeling recharged. That’s why I always emphasize to have a bedtime routine. Knowing when you will fall asleep at night and wake up in the morning is really important. In Sleep Time, we also want to have a good bedtime routine. That means putting all electronics away. And this leads into our next realm, which is Down Time.

Down Time

It is so important to have Down Time, either before bed or throughout your day. In Down Time, we just want to relax. We want to let our minds wander. We want to allow ourselves to daydream and see where our mind takes us. Again, the goal of the Healthy Mind Platter is recharging your brain. Sometimes throughout the day, and especially at night, we just need to turn it off so it can recharge. And you’re allowed to do that! You have my full permission to allow yourself to relax throughout your day — in between Focus Time, after Play Time, and in between Physical Time. Just allow your brain to turn off and let your mind to wander.

Read more about how to enjoy your own company

Time In

Time In reminds me of the idea of emotional wellness which I mentioned earlier. During Time In, it’s kind of like introspection time. We want to make sure that we are feeling good and we are grounding ourselves. This is a time to connect with yourself so that you can check in on how you’re feeling and see if you need anything for self-care to get you through your day. Put simply, this is just time where we can feel really grounded. One activity that I really suggest to my clients is to journal. Journaling is a great way to express those emotions and lean into ourselves so we can have some Time In.

Creating Your Healthy Mind Platter

Before you go, I just want to leave you with a few reminders. The first is that everyone’s Healthy Mind Platter is going to look different. Even yours could look different on a day-to-day basis, depending on what you need, what your day looks like, and where you’re located in your life. That’s why it’s really important that we take time to check in with ourselves (Time In) and connect with our authentic self (Connecting Time) on a daily basis. We want to make sure that we are vocalizing and being real with our needs and expectations. That way, you can take actionable steps to reboot your brain so it can thrive. One idea I share with my clients is to create a menu of all the different activities that could be on your Healthy Mind Platter. So for example, during Sleep Time, you can list all the different types of actionable steps and activities that you could take to leave yourself feeling good.

Want to learn more about holistic wellness?

Register for Marissa’s FREE wellness webinar!

REGISTER NOW

What are some activities on your healthy mind platter? Join the conversation in the comments below!

The post Using the Healthy Mind Platter to Improve Mental Wellness [Video] appeared first on myTherapyNYC - Counseling & Wellness.

Using the Healthy Mind Platter to Improve Mental Wellness [Video] published first on https://familycookwareshop.tumblr.com/

[ulrichfoester]

Using the Healthy Mind Platter to Improve Mental Wellness [Video]

Using the Healthy Mind Platter to Improve Mental Wellness [Transcript]

Today I’m going to talk to you about the Healthy Mind Platter that was created by Dr. Dan Siegel. The Healthy Mind Platter falls under one of the eight dimensions of holistic wellness. It falls under mental wellness. As a psychotherapist, I often think about emotions when it comes to mental wellness. The Healthy Mind Platter is also hitting on a different part of mental wellness. It’s all about recharging your brain and giving it the fuel it needs to work at its best. This allows you to be able to focus as well as recharge and reboot. It’s an opportunity to create connections so you can expand, grow, and be the abundant person that you are.

Focus Time

Focus Time is the time where you are doing your goal-oriented tasks for the day. This includes responsibilities in your personal life or responsibilities at work. Before you even start doing your work for the day, I often recommend writing out a list of must-do tasks. Once you do this, you can prioritize your list from most important to least. Next to that, write an estimated time of how long you need for each item to get done. Then you have an estimated time so you know when to take a break. This allows your brain to focus on the activity, instead of feeling like the workday is never ending.

Read more about how to increase your productivity

Connecting Time

Maybe after those five minutes of focusing on a task, check in with yourself and see how you’re connecting with your work and how you’re connecting with your day. During Connecting Time, it’s really important that we’re making connections with our authentic selves, with our relationships, or even with the world around us. One thing I really liked to do during Connecting Time is to go outside on a walk and talk to a friend on the phone. Since it’s always great to have an actual in-person connection, you can even ask the friend to come with you on a walk. During that time, you are connecting with your friend, you’re connecting with yourself, and you’re connecting with the world around you. And that’s exactly what Connecting Time is.

Play Time

This is my favorite. Play Time is when we are just reconnecting with our younger selves and doing things that we enjoy, just because we enjoy it. We want to engage in playful behavior, be silly, and be creative. So maybe as a child, you loved to draw or paint. That’s a beautiful activity for Play Time. Anything that creates a sense of joy and fulfillment in your life recharges your brain.

Physical Time

Physical Time is when we’re releasing energy, especially after Focus Time. So this could look like taking a few minutes just to do jumping jacks. You could also move your body in yoga or go out and exercise in the gym. This literally could just be a minute long — anything to exchange, recharge, and expel the energy from the long day. This actually leads into our next step, which is Sleep Time. It is really important that we have Physical Time to exude the energy from the day, which will make it a little bit easier at night to fall asleep.

Sleep Time

During Sleep Time, your brain is recharging. This allows you to make connections from the day and integrate what you were learning all day or taking in. My clients have shared that it can be really hard to fall asleep or wake up feeling recharged. That’s why I always emphasize to have a bedtime routine. Knowing when you will fall asleep at night and wake up in the morning is really important. In Sleep Time, we also want to have a good bedtime routine. That means putting all electronics away. And this leads into our next realm, which is Down Time.

Down Time

It is so important to have Down Time, either before bed or throughout your day. In Down Time, we just want to relax. We want to let our minds wander. We want to allow ourselves to daydream and see where our mind takes us. Again, the goal of the Healthy Mind Platter is recharging your brain. Sometimes throughout the day, and especially at night, we just need to turn it off so it can recharge. And you’re allowed to do that! You have my full permission to allow yourself to relax throughout your day — in between Focus Time, after Play Time, and in between Physical Time. Just allow your brain to turn off and let your mind to wander.

Read more about how to enjoy your own company

Time In

Time In reminds me of the idea of emotional wellness which I mentioned earlier. During Time In, it’s kind of like introspection time. We want to make sure that we are feeling good and we are grounding ourselves. This is a time to connect with yourself so that you can check in on how you’re feeling and see if you need anything for self-care to get you through your day. Put simply, this is just time where we can feel really grounded. One activity that I really suggest to my clients is to journal. Journaling is a great way to express those emotions and lean into ourselves so we can have some Time In.

Creating Your Healthy Mind Platter

Before you go, I just want to leave you with a few reminders. The first is that everyone’s Healthy Mind Platter is going to look different. Even yours could look different on a day-to-day basis, depending on what you need, what your day looks like, and where you’re located in your life. That’s why it’s really important that we take time to check in with ourselves (Time In) and connect with our authentic self (Connecting Time) on a daily basis. We want to make sure that we are vocalizing and being real with our needs and expectations. That way, you can take actionable steps to reboot your brain so it can thrive. One idea I share with my clients is to create a menu of all the different activities that could be on your Healthy Mind Platter. So for example, during Sleep Time, you can list all the different types of actionable steps and activities that you could take to leave yourself feeling good.

Want to learn more about holistic wellness?

Register for Marissa’s FREE wellness webinar!

REGISTER NOW

What are some activities on your healthy mind platter? Join the conversation in the comments below!

The post Using the Healthy Mind Platter to Improve Mental Wellness [Video] appeared first on myTherapyNYC - Counseling & Wellness.

Using the Healthy Mind Platter to Improve Mental Wellness [Video] published first on https://familycookwareshop.tumblr.com/

[ulrichfoester]

Using the Healthy Mind Platter to Improve Mental Wellness [Video]

Using the Healthy Mind Platter to Improve Mental Wellness [Transcript]

Today I’m going to talk to you about the Healthy Mind Platter that was created by Dr. Dan Siegel. The Healthy Mind Platter falls under one of the eight dimensions of holistic wellness. It falls under mental wellness. As a psychotherapist, I often think about emotions when it comes to mental wellness. The Healthy Mind Platter is also hitting on a different part of mental wellness. It’s all about recharging your brain and giving it the fuel it needs to work at its best. This allows you to be able to focus as well as recharge and reboot. It’s an opportunity to create connections so you can expand, grow, and be the abundant person that you are.

Focus Time

Focus Time is the time where you are doing your goal-oriented tasks for the day. This includes responsibilities in your personal life or responsibilities at work. Before you even start doing your work for the day, I often recommend writing out a list of must-do tasks. Once you do this, you can prioritize your list from most important to least. Next to that, write an estimated time of how long you need for each item to get done. Then you have an estimated time so you know when to take a break. This allows your brain to focus on the activity, instead of feeling like the workday is never ending.

Read more about how to increase your productivity

Connecting Time

Maybe after those five minutes of focusing on a task, check in with yourself and see how you’re connecting with your work and how you’re connecting with your day. During Connecting Time, it’s really important that we’re making connections with our authentic selves, with our relationships, or even with the world around us. One thing I really liked to do during Connecting Time is to go outside on a walk and talk to a friend on the phone. Since it’s always great to have an actual in-person connection, you can even ask the friend to come with you on a walk. During that time, you are connecting with your friend, you’re connecting with yourself, and you’re connecting with the world around you. And that’s exactly what Connecting Time is.

Play Time

This is my favorite. Play Time is when we are just reconnecting with our younger selves and doing things that we enjoy, just because we enjoy it. We want to engage in playful behavior, be silly, and be creative. So maybe as a child, you loved to draw or paint. That’s a beautiful activity for Play Time. Anything that creates a sense of joy and fulfillment in your life recharges your brain.

Physical Time

Physical Time is when we’re releasing energy, especially after Focus Time. So this could look like taking a few minutes just to do jumping jacks. You could also move your body in yoga or go out and exercise in the gym. This literally could just be a minute long — anything to exchange, recharge, and expel the energy from the long day. This actually leads into our next step, which is Sleep Time. It is really important that we have Physical Time to exude the energy from the day, which will make it a little bit easier at night to fall asleep.

Sleep Time

During Sleep Time, your brain is recharging. This allows you to make connections from the day and integrate what you were learning all day or taking in. My clients have shared that it can be really hard to fall asleep or wake up feeling recharged. That’s why I always emphasize to have a bedtime routine. Knowing when you will fall asleep at night and wake up in the morning is really important. In Sleep Time, we also want to have a good bedtime routine. That means putting all electronics away. And this leads into our next realm, which is Down Time.

Down Time

It is so important to have Down Time, either before bed or throughout your day. In Down Time, we just want to relax. We want to let our minds wander. We want to allow ourselves to daydream and see where our mind takes us. Again, the goal of the Healthy Mind Platter is recharging your brain. Sometimes throughout the day, and especially at night, we just need to turn it off so it can recharge. And you’re allowed to do that! You have my full permission to allow yourself to relax throughout your day — in between Focus Time, after Play Time, and in between Physical Time. Just allow your brain to turn off and let your mind to wander.

Read more about how to enjoy your own company

Time In

Time In reminds me of the idea of emotional wellness which I mentioned earlier. During Time In, it’s kind of like introspection time. We want to make sure that we are feeling good and we are grounding ourselves. This is a time to connect with yourself so that you can check in on how you’re feeling and see if you need anything for self-care to get you through your day. Put simply, this is just time where we can feel really grounded. One activity that I really suggest to my clients is to journal. Journaling is a great way to express those emotions and lean into ourselves so we can have some Time In.

Creating Your Healthy Mind Platter

Before you go, I just want to leave you with a few reminders. The first is that everyone’s Healthy Mind Platter is going to look different. Even yours could look different on a day-to-day basis, depending on what you need, what your day looks like, and where you’re located in your life. That’s why it’s really important that we take time to check in with ourselves (Time In) and connect with our authentic self (Connecting Time) on a daily basis. We want to make sure that we are vocalizing and being real with our needs and expectations. That way, you can take actionable steps to reboot your brain so it can thrive. One idea I share with my clients is to create a menu of all the different activities that could be on your Healthy Mind Platter. So for example, during Sleep Time, you can list all the different types of actionable steps and activities that you could take to leave yourself feeling good.

Want to learn more about holistic wellness?

Register for Marissa’s FREE wellness webinar!

REGISTER NOW

What are some activities on your healthy mind platter? Join the conversation in the comments below!

The post Using the Healthy Mind Platter to Improve Mental Wellness [Video] appeared first on myTherapyNYC - Counseling & Wellness.

Using the Healthy Mind Platter to Improve Mental Wellness [Video] published first on https://familycookwareshop.tumblr.com/

[ulrichfoester]

7 Money-Saving Tips for Young Families

Financial stress plays a major role in the health and wellbeing of families. It can result in divorce and dysfunction. That’s why it’s important you feel in control of your finances, and have clear trust and boundaries around them with your partner.

This week, financial consultant Robert McMillen shares 7 money-saving tips for young families with us. Use this is a springboard to talk about financial security, boundaries and goals with your partner. It won’t be easy, but if you approach with openness, it could do wonders for your family’s wellbeing. Check back next week for part 2 in our Money and Families series ‘3 Money Habits to Discuss with your Partner’.

7 Money-Saving Tips for Young Families

It’s challenging enough to save money when you’re just accountable for yourself. But when you have a family, pinching pennies becomes much more difficult. It’s safe to suppose that your wallet is bleeding from grocery shopping to locating a pair of jeans that will fit your kids for longer than three weeks. So how can you go from surviving to having financial security?

There are two approaches to saving money: money management, and financial management. Money management is often our go-to,  and focuses on the behavioural effects of your decision-making that might have a negative impact on the results of long-term plans.

However, Financial Management is. a great way to develop a healthy relationship with your money as you set up your family’s future. Essentially, it gives you a set of financial disciplines that helps you build wealth growth, protection, and preservation plans. And these are tailored to your individual and your family’s needs, objectives, values, priorities, and risk tolerance. Ultimately, Financial management

Ensures that financial needs are fulfilled;

Aids in the management of your income;

Helps with expenses, savings, and budgeting;

Ensures financial safety;

Boost your financial resources;

Boost your assets;

Improve your living standards;

Helps to become debt-free;

Yes, money can be overwhelming. So I have broken it down into 7 money essentials. Follow these and you can reduce money stress if your family significantly.

  You should spend less than you earn

Spending less than you earn frees up funds that may be used to make greater debt payments. They gradually fade away, lowering your monthly costs and providing you more breathing room.

  Take control of your career

Match your income to your lifestyle while making new purchases. At work, think about non-financial advantages, join helpful career networks, and seek out new possibilities to get the most out of your income.

  Have an emergency fund

An emergency fund is simply money placed aside to deal with life’s unforeseen catastrophes. If you lose your work or need to pay for something unexpected, the money will allow you to survive for a few months without getting into debt. Consider it an insurance policy.

  Save at least 10%

The 10 percent rule is as easy as dividing your total profits by ten. Money saved can be used to finance a retirement account, create an emergency fund, or contribute to a down payment on a home.

  Limit your debt

Debt is similar to bugs. It’s difficult to get rid of after it has infiltrated your life and begun to thrive. The key is to stay away from it in the first place. If you’re in debt, start repaying it as soon as possible. And check your credit report once a year, and pay off your debts regularly.

  Invest

Every day, the expense of life rises. Investing, on the other hand, is one method to combat inflation and increase your money quicker. You may learn about your alternatives, create an investing schedule, and decide how much to contribute.

  Protect yourself and your family

Nobody likes to think about the worst-case scenario, but it’s critical to have strategies in place to safeguard yourself, your assets, and your family if something goes wrong.

Today your goal could be to get-by financially. However, navigating Financial Management with your partner gives you the opportunity to set financial objectives and a different future for your family. So sit down and have that hard conversation with your partner. When you’re on the same page with your finances, everyone benefits.

Check back next week for Part 2 in our Money and Families series ‘3 Money Habits to Discuss with your Partner’.

Is your family splintering from stress? Do you need support to get on the same page and have open communication? Contact Colleen on 0434 337 245 or Duncan on 0434 331 243 for a FREE 10 minute consultation on how we can best help you or book online now.

The post 7 Money-Saving Tips for Young Families appeared first on Watersedge Counselling.

7 Money-Saving Tips for Young Families published first on https://familycookwareshop.tumblr.com/

[ulrichfoester]

Using the Healthy Mind Platter to Improve Mental Wellness [Video]

Using the Healthy Mind Platter to Improve Mental Wellness [Transcript]

Today I’m going to talk to you about the Healthy Mind Platter that was created by Dr. Dan Siegel. The Healthy Mind Platter falls under one of the eight dimensions of holistic wellness. It falls under mental wellness. As a psychotherapist, I often think about emotions when it comes to mental wellness. The Healthy Mind Platter is also hitting on a different part of mental wellness. It’s all about recharging your brain and giving it the fuel it needs to work at its best. This allows you to be able to focus as well as recharge and reboot. It’s an opportunity to create connections so you can expand, grow, and be the abundant person that you are.

Focus Time

Focus Time is the time where you are doing your goal-oriented tasks for the day. This includes responsibilities in your personal life or responsibilities at work. Before you even start doing your work for the day, I often recommend writing out a list of must-do tasks. Once you do this, you can prioritize your list from most important to least. Next to that, write an estimated time of how long you need for each item to get done. Then you have an estimated time so you know when to take a break. This allows your brain to focus on the activity, instead of feeling like the workday is never ending.

Read more about how to increase your productivity

Connecting Time

Maybe after those five minutes of focusing on a task, check in with yourself and see how you’re connecting with your work and how you’re connecting with your day. During Connecting Time, it’s really important that we’re making connections with our authentic selves, with our relationships, or even with the world around us. One thing I really liked to do during Connecting Time is to go outside on a walk and talk to a friend on the phone. Since it’s always great to have an actual in-person connection, you can even ask the friend to come with you on a walk. During that time, you are connecting with your friend, you’re connecting with yourself, and you’re connecting with the world around you. And that’s exactly what Connecting Time is.

Play Time

This is my favorite. Play Time is when we are just reconnecting with our younger selves and doing things that we enjoy, just because we enjoy it. We want to engage in playful behavior, be silly, and be creative. So maybe as a child, you loved to draw or paint. That’s a beautiful activity for Play Time. Anything that creates a sense of joy and fulfillment in your life recharges your brain.

Physical Time

Physical Time is when we’re releasing energy, especially after Focus Time. So this could look like taking a few minutes just to do jumping jacks. You could also move your body in yoga or go out and exercise in the gym. This literally could just be a minute long — anything to exchange, recharge, and expel the energy from the long day. This actually leads into our next step, which is Sleep Time. It is really important that we have Physical Time to exude the energy from the day, which will make it a little bit easier at night to fall asleep.

Sleep Time

During Sleep Time, your brain is recharging. This allows you to make connections from the day and integrate what you were learning all day or taking in. My clients have shared that it can be really hard to fall asleep or wake up feeling recharged. That’s why I always emphasize to have a bedtime routine. Knowing when you will fall asleep at night and wake up in the morning is really important. In Sleep Time, we also want to have a good bedtime routine. That means putting all electronics away. And this leads into our next realm, which is Down Time.

Down Time

It is so important to have Down Time, either before bed or throughout your day. In Down Time, we just want to relax. We want to let our minds wander. We want to allow ourselves to daydream and see where our mind takes us. Again, the goal of the Healthy Mind Platter is recharging your brain. Sometimes throughout the day, and especially at night, we just need to turn it off so it can recharge. And you’re allowed to do that! You have my full permission to allow yourself to relax throughout your day — in between Focus Time, after Play Time, and in between Physical Time. Just allow your brain to turn off and let your mind to wander.

Read more about how to enjoy your own company

Time In

Time In reminds me of the idea of emotional wellness which I mentioned earlier. During Time In, it’s kind of like introspection time. We want to make sure that we are feeling good and we are grounding ourselves. This is a time to connect with yourself so that you can check in on how you’re feeling and see if you need anything for self-care to get you through your day. Put simply, this is just time where we can feel really grounded. One activity that I really suggest to my clients is to journal. Journaling is a great way to express those emotions and lean into ourselves so we can have some Time In.

Creating Your Healthy Mind Platter

Before you go, I just want to leave you with a few reminders. The first is that everyone’s Healthy Mind Platter is going to look different. Even yours could look different on a day-to-day basis, depending on what you need, what your day looks like, and where you’re located in your life. That’s why it’s really important that we take time to check in with ourselves (Time In) and connect with our authentic self (Connecting Time) on a daily basis. We want to make sure that we are vocalizing and being real with our needs and expectations. That way, you can take actionable steps to reboot your brain so it can thrive. One idea I share with my clients is to create a menu of all the different activities that could be on your Healthy Mind Platter. So for example, during Sleep Time, you can list all the different types of actionable steps and activities that you could take to leave yourself feeling good.

Want to learn more about holistic wellness?

Register for Marissa’s FREE wellness webinar!

REGISTER NOW

What are some activities on your healthy mind platter? Join the conversation in the comments below!

The post Using the Healthy Mind Platter to Improve Mental Wellness [Video] appeared first on myTherapyNYC - Counseling & Wellness.

Using the Healthy Mind Platter to Improve Mental Wellness [Video] published first on https://familycookwareshop.tumblr.com/

[ulrichfoester]

Managing Mental Health With a Chronic Illness

Chronic Illness and Mental Health

Living with a chronic illness is difficult in itself. Unfortunately, most chronic illnesses are coupled with mental health challenges, making life that much more overwhelming.

But it doesn’t have to be that way forever. Although it may seem like the odds are against you when managing mental health with a chronic illness, there are significant benefits to taking on the challenge. These benefits include improving your outlook on life, living with intention, and pursuing your greatest passions.

Here are six ways you can be proactive in taking care of your mental health while managing a chronic illness.

Accept and Appreciate Where You Are

An excellent first step to managing mental health with a chronic illness is to acknowledge and accept that you’re dealing with what you’re dealing with. Then, you can work on appreciating your current circumstances and showing yourself grace.

Managing a mental health condition and a chronic illness simultaneously can be extremely trying and defeating at times. So, it’s okay to honor feelings of sadness, anger, confusion, frustration, and negativity. Just do your best not to live there. Even if it’s shaving just a second off the time you spend in those feelings that make managing your conditions seem impossible; it’s worth working at it.

Next, ensure you’re in charge of your mental health and wellness journey.

Lead Your Mental Health and Wellness Journey

Chronic conditions coupled with mental health challenges require a lot of specialized care. Because of this, you’ll need multiple providers and, therefore, must be an advocate for your holistic health.

One of the main reasons you want to lead your mental health and wellness journey rather than it leading you is because silos in healthcare are ever-present. When people see a variety of healthcare providers that don’t communicate with one another, it results in everything each provider learns about a patient staying with them, instead of their findings being communicated to every medical professional involved in the patient’s care.

This lack of communication leads to costly duplicate treatment, inaccurate diagnoses, professionals prescribing unsafe combinations of medication, patients feeling dismissed and defeated because they aren’t getting better, and so forth.

Information technology systems, like Electronic Health Records, can help eliminate silos in healthcare because they allow medical professionals to update and view patient information and facilitate treatment all in the same system. But effective use of these systems starts with medical providers committing to treating their patients from a holistic perspective rather than a fragmented one.

It also starts with your ability to communicate your feelings, physical ailments, and other symptoms in as much detail as possible so you can develop a treatment plan and medical team that includes support for your chronic condition, mental health challenge, and emotional wellness all at once.

Each specialist you work with should be on board with transparent communication, effective collaboration, and creating a cohesive health and wellness plan that addresses all of your health concerns.

Additionally, self-educating yourself on the mental health condition and chronic illness you’re living with can help.

Self-Educate

Self-education can aid a more positive journey in managing mental health with a chronic illness. Unfortunately, many people living with chronic diseases and mental health conditions have more difficult days than good ones because they feel so out of control of the entire situation.

Part of that out-of-control feeling can be attributed to a lack of knowledge. When you study your conditions, learn the best practices for managing them, and educate yourself on how to best work with your medical team, there’s a good chance you’ll feel more like you’re being proactive rather than reactive. And that can be empowering, encouraging, and impactful.

You can also manage living with a mental health condition and chronic illness with the help of a solid support group.

Find a Support Group

The right support group can be a powerful influence on your ability to manage your mental health with a chronic illness. It’s easy to feel like you’re alone in your battle. Support groups give you the comfort of knowing that you aren’t.

There are people out there going through what you’re going through. Hearing similar stories and different perspectives on healing and moving forward can keep you uplifted and positive throughout your journey.

You can use social media to find support groups dedicated to your chronic illness, mental health condition, or both. Join them virtually or in-person and begin forming those social relationships you need to succeed.

Furthermore, even if you don’t want to join a formal support group, surround yourself with supportive people who understand what you’re going through. They should also be willing to join you in activities that promote good mental health while managing chronic illnesses like prioritizing exercise and nutrition.

Prioritize Regular Exercise and Good Nutrition

Regular exercise and good nutrition are the keys to an overall healthy lifestyle. With that being said, prioritizing physical activity and eating well can positively influence those living with chronic illnesses and mental health challenges specifically.

For example, many people are living with chronic pain. Chronic pain can lead to anxiety disorders, severe depression, panic disorders, impulse control issues, and other emotional disorders. Also, because chronic pain is often treated with opioids, it can lead to addiction issues.

Instead of prescribing opioids to treat chronic pain and the additional medications to treat mental health concerns, regular exercise and good nutrition are at the top of the list of treatment options. Regular exercise can help you strengthen your physical body and improve your pain, eliminating the need for opioids. In addition, a nutritious diet can help you improve your mental stamina and the function of your insides.

Lastly, if you ever feel like you need more support, don’t be afraid to seek it.

Know When to See a Mental Health Specialist

Many of us need more than ourselves, family, and friends to navigate the mental, emotional, and physical effects of living with a chronic illness and accompanying mental health challenges. And that’s okay. Take the next step and see a mental health specialist when you feel therapy and additional guidance would be beneficial.

For example, two primary mental health challenges associated with various chronic illnesses are depression and anxiety. Although it may seem like they don’t overlap, they do more often than not. You can manage both conditions together by making lifestyle changes like getting better sleep, eating well, and practicing mindfulness.

But when your chronic condition, depression, and anxiety still interfere with your daily life and your loved ones share their concerns,  it may be time to see a professional.

Ultimately, don’t be afraid to reach out to a professional for help. Their qualifications and knowledge allow them to provide an additional layer of support and perspective on helping you thrive while living with a chronic illness and mental health challenge.

Conclusion

Managing mental health with a chronic illness requires a consistent effort and commitment, but it’s absolutely doable. Use the tips above to start on your path to mental wellness and successfully managing your chronic illness.

The post Managing Mental Health With a Chronic Illness appeared first on The Treatment Specialist.

Managing Mental Health With a Chronic Illness published first on https://familycookwareshop.tumblr.com/

[ulrichfoester]

Managing Mental Health With a Chronic Illness

Chronic Illness and Mental Health

Living with a chronic illness is difficult in itself. Unfortunately, most chronic illnesses are coupled with mental health challenges, making life that much more overwhelming.

But it doesn’t have to be that way forever. Although it may seem like the odds are against you when managing mental health with a chronic illness, there are significant benefits to taking on the challenge. These benefits include improving your outlook on life, living with intention, and pursuing your greatest passions.

Here are six ways you can be proactive in taking care of your mental health while managing a chronic illness.

Accept and Appreciate Where You Are

An excellent first step to managing mental health with a chronic illness is to acknowledge and accept that you’re dealing with what you’re dealing with. Then, you can work on appreciating your current circumstances and showing yourself grace.

Managing a mental health condition and a chronic illness simultaneously can be extremely trying and defeating at times. So, it’s okay to honor feelings of sadness, anger, confusion, frustration, and negativity. Just do your best not to live there. Even if it’s shaving just a second off the time you spend in those feelings that make managing your conditions seem impossible; it’s worth working at it.

Next, ensure you’re in charge of your mental health and wellness journey.

Lead Your Mental Health and Wellness Journey

Chronic conditions coupled with mental health challenges require a lot of specialized care. Because of this, you’ll need multiple providers and, therefore, must be an advocate for your holistic health.

One of the main reasons you want to lead your mental health and wellness journey rather than it leading you is because silos in healthcare are ever-present. When people see a variety of healthcare providers that don’t communicate with one another, it results in everything each provider learns about a patient staying with them, instead of their findings being communicated to every medical professional involved in the patient’s care.

This lack of communication leads to costly duplicate treatment, inaccurate diagnoses, professionals prescribing unsafe combinations of medication, patients feeling dismissed and defeated because they aren’t getting better, and so forth.

Information technology systems, like Electronic Health Records, can help eliminate silos in healthcare because they allow medical professionals to update and view patient information and facilitate treatment all in the same system. But effective use of these systems starts with medical providers committing to treating their patients from a holistic perspective rather than a fragmented one.

It also starts with your ability to communicate your feelings, physical ailments, and other symptoms in as much detail as possible so you can develop a treatment plan and medical team that includes support for your chronic condition, mental health challenge, and emotional wellness all at once.

Each specialist you work with should be on board with transparent communication, effective collaboration, and creating a cohesive health and wellness plan that addresses all of your health concerns.

Additionally, self-educating yourself on the mental health condition and chronic illness you’re living with can help.

Self-Educate

Self-education can aid a more positive journey in managing mental health with a chronic illness. Unfortunately, many people living with chronic diseases and mental health conditions have more difficult days than good ones because they feel so out of control of the entire situation.

Part of that out-of-control feeling can be attributed to a lack of knowledge. When you study your conditions, learn the best practices for managing them, and educate yourself on how to best work with your medical team, there’s a good chance you’ll feel more like you’re being proactive rather than reactive. And that can be empowering, encouraging, and impactful.

You can also manage living with a mental health condition and chronic illness with the help of a solid support group.

Find a Support Group

The right support group can be a powerful influence on your ability to manage your mental health with a chronic illness. It’s easy to feel like you’re alone in your battle. Support groups give you the comfort of knowing that you aren’t.

There are people out there going through what you’re going through. Hearing similar stories and different perspectives on healing and moving forward can keep you uplifted and positive throughout your journey.

You can use social media to find support groups dedicated to your chronic illness, mental health condition, or both. Join them virtually or in-person and begin forming those social relationships you need to succeed.

Furthermore, even if you don’t want to join a formal support group, surround yourself with supportive people who understand what you’re going through. They should also be willing to join you in activities that promote good mental health while managing chronic illnesses like prioritizing exercise and nutrition.

Prioritize Regular Exercise and Good Nutrition

Regular exercise and good nutrition are the keys to an overall healthy lifestyle. With that being said, prioritizing physical activity and eating well can positively influence those living with chronic illnesses and mental health challenges specifically.

For example, many people are living with chronic pain. Chronic pain can lead to anxiety disorders, severe depression, panic disorders, impulse control issues, and other emotional disorders. Also, because chronic pain is often treated with opioids, it can lead to addiction issues.

Instead of prescribing opioids to treat chronic pain and the additional medications to treat mental health concerns, regular exercise and good nutrition are at the top of the list of treatment options. Regular exercise can help you strengthen your physical body and improve your pain, eliminating the need for opioids. In addition, a nutritious diet can help you improve your mental stamina and the function of your insides.

Lastly, if you ever feel like you need more support, don’t be afraid to seek it.

Know When to See a Mental Health Specialist

Many of us need more than ourselves, family, and friends to navigate the mental, emotional, and physical effects of living with a chronic illness and accompanying mental health challenges. And that’s okay. Take the next step and see a mental health specialist when you feel therapy and additional guidance would be beneficial.

For example, two primary mental health challenges associated with various chronic illnesses are depression and anxiety. Although it may seem like they don’t overlap, they do more often than not. You can manage both conditions together by making lifestyle changes like getting better sleep, eating well, and practicing mindfulness.

But when your chronic condition, depression, and anxiety still interfere with your daily life and your loved ones share their concerns,  it may be time to see a professional.

Ultimately, don’t be afraid to reach out to a professional for help. Their qualifications and knowledge allow them to provide an additional layer of support and perspective on helping you thrive while living with a chronic illness and mental health challenge.

Conclusion

Managing mental health with a chronic illness requires a consistent effort and commitment, but it’s absolutely doable. Use the tips above to start on your path to mental wellness and successfully managing your chronic illness.

The post Managing Mental Health With a Chronic Illness appeared first on The Treatment Specialist.

Managing Mental Health With a Chronic Illness published first on https://familycookwareshop.tumblr.com/