ultrcviolet

[ultrcviolet]

❝            i’m sure you’re gonna make a fantastic trophy husband someday. ❞ maeve teased. ❝ okay, first of all, my favourite place would definitely sell more booze than a hot topic. ❞ but have fewer people than the bear den. ❝ vatican city ? that’s bold. ❞ the wicked smirk as maeve considered the suggestion. ❝ if i had to haunt there for the rest of my afterlife, i’d probably die all over again. it might almost be worth it for the infamy. ❞ there were plenty of people so focused on changing the world within their lifetime, making their mark. maeve wasn’t one of those people. she didn’t care about a legacy or a fancy headstone that's only purpose was to collect dust. ❝ taking it upon yourself to honour my memory, huh ? figured you just wanted to fuck with people. ❞ it was a nice sentiment, even if they were talking hypotheticals. maeve sure as shit wouldn’t have a turnout like this, but it was nice to think there’d be people noticing her absence. ❝ you’re shutting down vatican city, and i’m pouring one out on your ashes ? fuck that. i deserve a better way to honour you if you kick it first. ❞ you deserve better ? that might have been more accurate, but the phrase too sweet to say out loud.

"yeah, worst come to worst" noah smirked a little and bumped her shoulder back, "at least i'm a certified hottie." he'd realized over the past couple weeks how touch-starved he'd become, which was quite a realization because before the entire town got turned upside down with hope's murder, he rarely spent his nights alone. there was a difference between sex and intimacy; he'd never thought that he was missing out on anything before. "shut down your favorite place?" he arched a brow and shook his head slightly, "shouldn't i try to shut down like...vatican city or something? if the point is to truly honor your memory."

[ultrcviolet]

‘ what do you think happens after death ’ was a loaded question. one that maeve certainly wasn’t going to get into seriously. a topic she didn’t like to spend too long thinking about in general. the idea of confronting your mortality unappealing as a whole. ❝            hottest chick those nerds are ever gonna see, and it’s a fuckin cadaver. ❞ even before hope, maeve had never pictured death as something that came after a long, full life. the 27 club and white lighters always sounding more realistic. ❝ i dunno. i think cremation sounds like the best way to get rid of me. zombie apocalypse would be a hell of a lot more manageable if more people went that route. ❞

"well, i guess it depends on what you think happens after you drop dead," ren hummed with a small shrug of her shoulder, unperturbed about the whole 'creepier than a funeral home' thing. creepy and weird were thrown in her direction just as often as bitch and asshole were—usually, behind her back, like they'd turn to stone if they looked her in the eyes too long ( or maybe it was her last name, but she'd like to think she'd earned her own gorgon reputation without her mother's legacy ). she didn't take it personally; that's just what happened when you'd rather build an ant colony than go to prom. "because, personally, i don't think i'm really going to be around to see what happens after, so obviously i'm going to want what little value my dead body has put to good use. if my organs aren't viable for transplant, they can at least make good practice for med students."

[ultrcviolet]

❝            right. ❞ though maeve understood the why behind it, that didn’t completely snuff the disappointment that came with it. growing closer to hope had subsequently meant drifting further from maeve. not that either of them had been malicious about it. simply people being people and drifting apart. it was probably stupid to believe that it would be reversed with a snap of her fingers.

she shook her head at his carrying on, entertainment clear on her features. ❝ you think you’re getting a minion out this ? ❞ her eyebrow raised in theo’s direction. ❝ please. a little cash under my belt and i’d be unstoppable. would make you my minion before you even realised what was happening, reyes. ❞

the amusement drained out of his eyes, just a little, and he slid his focus over to the gathering of people. "hope's theo has to exist, for the rest of this investigation anyway. my dad liked hope's theo better too. and as much as i hate to admit it, his approval still means something to me. even if it just means a paycheck." he couldn't afford his place on his current salary.

when theo looked back at her, he seemed to perk up. worrying less about the audience of people waiting for another performance. "how could the path of wealth be the path of evil? that like, never happens. everyone loves the rich. famously. i'm not trying to get new minions or anything."

[ultrcviolet]

maeve laid on her back in her bed, copy of stephen king's misery held up in front of her. the sound of pencil scratching against paper and book pages turning filled the silence until abril spoke up. she bent the corner of the page she was reading before putting the book down next to her. maeve turned onto her side, propping herself up on one elbow to give abril her attention. a little nod of her head as encouragement to go on with whatever she had started saying. the question stopped maeve in her tracks, genuinely thinking. ❝            i think you're fun. ❞ in the way that she enjoyed spending time with abril. ❝ and, i don’t know, i think being spontaneous is overrated. ❞ maeve was spontaneous. most of her other friends, too. which was really just a prettier way of saying reckless. having a little bit more routine and peace in abril was nice. ❝ where is this coming from ? ❞

as she laid on maeve's bed with her sketchbook and pencil in hand, she was deep in thought. after the funeral, she started to question if she was living her life, or if she was letting her life pass her by. she didn't have her mom anymore to guide her, so naturally, she turned to her best friend for an open and honest conversation. at least she hoped maeve wouldn't think she was on the verge of a colossal quarter-life crisis. "i need you to be incredibly honest with me," she started, wondering if the question that was about to be posed was a ridiculous one. "do you think i'm spontaneous and fun?" @ultrcviolet

[ultrcviolet]

❝            hmm, you're right, ❞ maeve hummed. ❝ i don't think you have that much power. ❞ she didn't know - or care to learn - much about the police ranking system. javier could have been top dog or bottom of the barrel, but it didn't really matter. ❝ it's not my fault you've got a weird list of turn ons. ❞ at least it was a little more common than getting off on getting stuck with the bill. ❝ is that because you assume it'd just be one of those little half assed slaps? because it wouldn't be. it'd hurt. ❞ that's what she'd tell herself. ❝ or i'll, like, punch you. that's tough and un-sexy. ❞

" a man in a position of power, huh ? and wrapped around your finger ? " javi questioned, a hint of a smirk playing on his lips. " well, maeve, you may be overestimating one of those things. " her words certainly didn't go unnoticed as she called him out on his supposed tough talk. he admired her spirit, her refusal to back down, and he couldn't deny the truth in her statement. leaning in closer his gaze locked with maeve's. " you want to slap me ? didn't we literally just talk about how you gotta come up with things that don't turn me on ? "

[ultrcviolet]

❝            this is the moment you learn that i'm a saint. i've laughed at your jokes and it's been a painful sacrifice every single time. ❞ realistically, he probably knew her too well than to believe she'd force a laugh to spare his feelings.

maeve raised an eyebrow at theo's counter theory. ❝ you think a couple gets murdered and the first connection they're gonna make it that you're both rich ? i'll just make sure number two is a poor person. bam. pattern broken. ❞ paired with the charade of dropping the mic. ❝ besides, even if i did snap on fox, female serial killers are seriously lacking. people would love me the way bundy and dahmer got all those love letters back in their day. i'd be iconic. you going down for an oh - so typical girlfriend slashing ? just another statistic. ❞

"come on, you've laughed at my jokes before. i'm very funny." though, mostly, people laughed at him doing something goofy or cooed at animals. and he wasn't exactly looking for a career in stand up. one-liners weren't really considered comedy.

"or they'll think the killer is going rich people hunting and the fbi and cia and that team from criminal minds will be in your bad faster than you can say 'we're not open yet'. then it'll be a real shit show. they'll have fox news with camera in your face. then you'll really snap. no meticulous planning will help." dark humor felt good, just getting to joke about this without feeling like someone was going to record him on their phone and turn it over to channel four news or the shitty podcast. fucking actually coping.

[ultrcviolet]

the amused smirk lingered on maeve's face as she watched theo laugh and then quickly readjust his composure. this was still a funeral, and he was still suspect number one. ❝           some people liked you just fine before all that. ❞ i liked you before all that, hidden underneath the roll of her eyes. ❝ is hope's theo being buried alongside her ? is it too suspicious to change so soon after a murder ? what's the go ? ❞

pinecones with googly eyes. ❝ fuck, you're even gonna come up with my scheme for me ? ❞ hand over her chest in dramatized flattery. ❝ i can't lose now. i'll either get rich or be able to use you as scapegoat for leading me down a very dark path. i'll blame the entire fall from grace on you, reyes. ❞ though, truthfully, maeve couldn't even remember when grace was.

a laugh startled out of his chest, and he slapped a hand over his mouth. he thought about all the shit he stopped doing because of hope. to be a part of hope's circle. how he used to love anime and art and collecting trading cards and fantasy books. and instead he focused on sports and fashion and parties and gossip and hope's interests. "yeah, that wasn't exactly easy. you know how it is. trying to be the kind of person hope liked was like... my whole life for years."

he shook his head because, yeah, that kind of was all it took. but even among the rich and famous, there was still being the right kind of guy. but maeve didn't want to hear about how hard it was being rich and popular. "hey i'll give you a small loan, say, two hundred dollars, that's a lot right? and you can get rich quick selling pinecones with googly eyes on them, and you'll be one of us. hope will come back to life just to tell you. that's what everyone wants."

[ultrcviolet]

❝           never said i didn't. ❞ the fact that she agreed she deserved the treatment only added salt to the wound. if she had been feeling a little more of the invincible she had claimed to be just a few nights ago, maeve probably wouldn't have been so prickly. could have accepted the attempt at comfort without having to search for the dark side of it. ❝ but maybe that’s all we are. i'm a parasite and you don't care. ❞ the sarcastic chuckle falling from her lips as maeve shook her head. ❝ what a fucking match, huh ? ❞

maeve's ability to swiftly turn the tables struck a chord, reminding javeri of the words he'd spewed out in the heat of the moment. despite not meaning what he had said, javi knew he had lashed out in anger and wished he hadn't, but his wounded pride prevented him from apologising. and in the end, if they weren't friends, then he had nothing to be sorry for — that's how it works, right ? " you deserved it... " his arms crossed over his chest, teeth gnawing into his lower lip. " besides, i didn't start this, you did. "

[ultrcviolet]

❝            wow thank you for the permission, ❞ sarcasm dripping from each word. was she she sad ? the internal question taunted her. maeve was mad. she was mad hope stood her up, mad someone had hurt someone she cared about ( in their own fucked up way ), mad that she even cared in the first place. but if she sat with it long enough, she lost all the fierceness and heat of her anger. after spending so many years replacing every negative emotion with a wrath strong enough to protect her from being hurt, the lack of it just felt numb. was this sadness or some telltale sign maeve was broken ? ❝ anyone that had to follow you around would get sick of you pretty quick. don't think you'd have to try very hard for that. ❞

"well, i didn't say the competition was steep." he chuckled, grinning down at her. if anyone looked over, they'd probably say his behavior wasn't appropriate for the occasion. not that he cared. he laughed, nodding, "you're probably right, but you're still allowed to be fuckin' sad if ya want, maeve. this is pretty sad." naturally, "hope haunting me would be kinda funny, though. i would mess with her right back, make a space so inhospitable to a ghost."

[ultrcviolet]

❝            i don’t know, ❞ she admitted. ❝ i don’t know what i want. ❞ she wanted none of this to be happening to them. let someone else be the town’s punching bag. from the way julien looked at her, she’d even prefer to swap places. which she’d never admit to because it clashed with her strong belief that she protected self preservation above everything else. ❝ but i am here for you. ❞ in her own, weird way. ❝ i wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you. if i really thought that of you, i wouldn't come pick a fight. i'm not an idiot on some justice crusade. ❞ maybe it wasn't comfort, but that had never been something she claimed she could do for him.

❝ julien. ❞ when he was getting up from the couch, she didn’t stop herself from reaching out for him. as if taking his hand in hers again could fix everything. the thud of the bag against the coffee table broke the heavy silence of the room. maeve winced at the sound, still as he took his seat back next to her. teary eyes flickered from julien sitting next to her on the couch to the bag. she hesitated before leaning forward to look through it. ❝ no, it’s not that. ❞ she shuffled closer to him, reaching out to brush his hair back. resting on the side of his neck to keep her looking at her. ❝ i’m sorry. i just… ❞ let her trust issues take the reigns and act without thinking ? came in too hot because that was the way she always did with him ? ❝ i just got you back. i love you, julien. what the fuck am i supposed to do with that ? i needed to hear you say it. sue me. ❞

it was important to note that julien had never been the best at handling highly emotional situations. if he couldn't run from something, he'd surely find himself in a place of pause. and he noticed often he went to a place around maeve whenever things began getting confrontational its as if he were watching himself outside of his own body, screaming at himself to say the right things, but not being able to do much of anything but appear disinterested and shut down. he let out a frustrated sigh. " what do you want from me, maeve? " if he had been able to actually connect some dots in his emotions to his words, he might've said something along the lines that it hurt she'd think that of him.

despite how the air was filled with heaviness and tension, julien felt at ease when she sat beside him. but after hearing maeve, he turned to look at her, his facial expression displaying a lot more wounding than he probably wanted to allude to. " wow. you know... i had this crazy idea that maybe you came here to comfort me, not berate me into making you believe that i'm not a killer. " rolling his eyes, he finally stood up from his couch and walked away into the laundry room, retrieving a grocery bag from under the cabinet. inside the bag was a roll of untouched ductape, bleach, a hammer, nails, and other odds and ends. he dropped it on the coffee table in front of the couch before going back to sit down. " happy? did you get all the proof you needed to... i don't know.... trust me? " he doubted a killer who needed those suspicious purchases would still have them unused.

[ultrcviolet]

❝            you got one thing going for ya. ❞ the playful nudge to his shoulder lingering for a moment. at attempt at comfort disguised. it had never been so complicated to touch noah. not even when it was some stupid revenge plot on hope mercer. it had all been superficial. ❝ god, ew. ❞ though he was probably right. it's not like there was a real passion behind it, as far as maeve knew. perhaps it was something that tied into the mentality that the funeral itself was comforting. ❝ only if you get caught and it becomes some big thing. like how people kept trying to scatter ashes at disneyland at they closed rides and shit. shut down hot topic or don't even try. ❞

noah tipped his head back agains the wall and let the heaviness of his lids take over until his unreasonably long lashes rested against the dark circles under his eyes. "good thing life's a beauty contest," he hummed quietly, corner of his mouth twitching into a small smirk. that was half the reason people loved hope, whether they wanted to admit or not. she was sure nice to look at, even when she was throwing one of your limited edition air jordan's at your head. "you know half of them are totally into it, right? that has to be a statistic somewhere: go with a funeral home, and there's 50% chance you'll get fucked over even when your dead." he couldn't imagine any other reason you'd want to play with dead people all day, but insight into the human mind wasn't really his forte. probably why he couldn't figure out why he was still here. he had the money to go anywhere he wanted now, and here he was: same shitty town with the same shitty people. "i'll make sure to take a baggie of you to hot topic if you go first."

[ultrcviolet]

❝            why would i block the tik tok whore ? are you kidding me ? ❞ maeve couldn't help but laugh as javier described his plans. ❝ i can’t believe i have to be the one to tell you this. people don’t like cops. if you wanna monetise off daddy issues, you’re gonna have to resort to only fans. pretend it’s all just a sexy little character. ‘ fuck the police ’ is your whole thing. only fuzzy handcuffs and shit like that. just don't get your hopes up because i'm never paying to see that. ❞

" why would you block me ? i could so be tiktok famous. " here we go. " i'd whore myself out, big time. i'd do those fit checks in some tight uniform and what's that other thing called ? thirst traps ? i could do that. " fit checks and thirst traps used in the same sentence — thanks to maeve, his vocabulary was degrading day by day. he peers up at the other, almost as if he was searching for her approval, arm dropping to rest on her thighs. " let me monetise off other peoples' daddy issues. "

[ultrcviolet]

❝            chill on the ' g word ' , dude. ❞ as if drawing attention to it made it worse. ❝ the brains compared to you, ❞ she teased. the step into his side was subtle as her arm wrapped around his waist. ❝ are you kidding me ? she's probably sitting in front of a flat screen in hell taking attendance. ❞ at least, that's the kind of excuse maeve would give to justify the fact she wanted to be there. the fact she ached for a goodbye that she would never get. it would always be one-sided, like most of their time with hope alive. ❝ you're welcome for saving you from being haunted, by the way. ❞

"i've got the cash. happy to bankroll my grieving pal." micah teased her with a gentle smile. it was the only non-selfish use of his cash anyway- even when he bought women drinks, it was self-serving ultimately. he frowned then, slinging his arm loosely around maeve's shoulders with a slight shake of his head, "you're not a fuckin' idiot- you're the brains of the operation, don't you forget it." he sighed, "grief is fucking weird, ok? bein' here isn't wrong, not bein' here also wouldn't be wrong. but... she doesn't have that over you anymore. like, it's fucked that she's gone, but you don't have to worry about what she thinks anymore. she doesn't know if you're here or not."

[ultrcviolet]

❝            interesting is not the term you use to describe someone you want another shot at. just a heads up. ❞ though she couldn't think of a better word either. ❝ we talked about you at hope's funeral. thought i was sharing some good advice about targeting you if she wanted an in with the cops. turns out she was one step ahead of me. ❞ a slut had not been the description maeve had been expecting from javier, the chuckle as she sat back down next to him. ❝ a slut without options from the sound of things. if you're considering going back. ❞

she watched javier with a smirk, waiting for the reaction. of course there was the possibility she had pushed her luck after so adamantly pushing him away. his words eased any lingering thought of lingering resentment from him. ❝ oh, i know. it’s intentional. you're too easy to get a reaction from. ❞

despite maeve's blunt remarks catching him off guard, a faint smile tugged at the corner of his lips — she was always unfiltered and he loved it. " crazy, right ? she's not that bad, but she's, um, interesting. i definitely wouldn't wanna cross her. " he said, head shaking from side to side at the other's question, hand running through his hair. " haven't slept with her since hope died. honestly, not even sure if i'd even sleep with her now. i mean, i probably would because i'm a slut, but it'd feel weird. "

' they're man enough to do something about it. ' those words alone were enough to send javier into overdrive, inhaling sharply as he tried to suppress his impulses. perhaps if they were ANYWHERE else right now he'd already be all over maeve, but on the same consecrated grounds where hope's funeral was held ? it was certainly a little off-putting. " don't say shit like that, you're killing me. "

[ultrcviolet]

❝            what ? ❞ maeve looked at javier over her shoulder. ❝ you’re kidding. i didn’t think ronnie still had it in her. hope always made it seem like her mom was some stuck up bitch. ❞ and it’s not like maeve was the kind of friend you’d bring home to your parents. ❝ i just assumed she wasn’t getting any. you know how old couples are. ❞ at least, the stereotype that was painted of them. the ball and chain, staying together for the children. the narrative pushed that all marriages were loveless. and sexless. ❝ are you still ? ❞

she shrugged at javier’s condition. sure, she knew he would be there for her. she knew that even before he had to make a whole scene of it. the hard part was admitting that she needed him. ❝ yeah, sure. whatever. ❞ at least if she ever did, she’d be able to wave ‘ you asked for this ’ in his face when he inevitably got sick of their relationship not being purely a good time anymore. ❝ i dunno. i can think of a few other guys that'll tell you a different experience. y'know because they're man enough to do something about it. ❞ maeve teased, taking a step back towards him as the conversation lightened.

" i won't betray your trust, i promise. " javi said in an attempt to assure her, emphasising the seriousness of his commitment, hoping to convey his sincerity. " hell, i'll even give you some dirt on me so that we're even. " secrets: javi didn't have too many of them, but the ones that he did have were held close to his chest — he could share about his upbringing or the amount of collateral damage he'd managed to rack up over his years in the military, but those secrets were too dark. he needed to offer something more normal. " i fucked mrs. mercer for a bit. " infidelity seemed to be a more acceptable topic.

he can't help but laugh as maeve questioned his intentions, shaking his head from side to side before tilting back to look up at the night sky. " as long as you know that i'm here if you need me, this doesn't need to be a regular thing. " his words make him cringe inside, eyes shutting momentarily in an attempt to snap out of the sappy mood he seemed to be in. " besides, i would rather makeout and get left with blue balls; gotta love the maeve experience. "

[ultrcviolet]

if it were anyone else, maeve probably would have smacked their hand away before they managed to get a comfortable grip on her shoulder. theo, however, got a small smile in return. ❝            yeah, i know they were. ❞ and perhaps if it were just hope, it wouldn’t be gnawing at her insides. ❝ congrats on making the cut, ❞ she teased.

❝ fuck, you mean that’s all someone has to do to get away with it ? ❞ of course it was. money was the answer to everything. especially in a small town where everyone knew everyone, generations worth of bribery and connections based on mutual benefit. ❝ i’ll find one of those ‘ get rich quick ’ schemes and then hope will whip out a ouija board to talk about us because then it’ll be endearing and cool to know me. ❞ crazy that the idea of hope apologising was the most unbelievable thing in a sentence of schemes & seances.

"i hate to say it, because she's... dead. but... i just mean... maeve you don't need to meet hope's standards, they were kind of insane. she had a log of ideas about perfection." theo reached his hand out to her shoulder, giving it a squeeze. fuck, maeve probably didn't even care about what hope thought about her or other people thought of her. because she was sure of herself and moved through the world without needing approval. but just in case she wanted it, she had theo's approval.

theo wondered, if he wasn't expected to be here, would he have come? would he mourn hope on his own time and visit her grave when he wanted to? would he ever want to? he didn't really believe in ghosts and the afterlife was a can of worms he didn't like thinking about. "i come from a family of weirdos but... we're all rich so we get to be." he did chuckle, though. "yeah, she would. hope loved being the winner."

[ultrcviolet]

❝            you’re really gonna make me say it ? ❞ it wasn’t that outlandish for someone to want to hear it from someone that loved them. another night, the question probably would have been shrugged off with some warning about ' not pushing his luck ' but she had come this far. ❝ because you're important to me. ❞ the words stated as a fact, lacking all the internal hesitation maeve had about verbalizing those thoughts. it was one thing to be vulnerable when they were practically alone in the cathedral. not shutting him out and regretting it when she felt stupid the next morning ? that was harder. ❝ i don't know, ❞ she admitted quietly. ❝ what happens when this is all over ? ❞ maeve inched closer to him at the admission of caring. her head rested on his shoulder, other arm draped over her body until fingertips brushed his forearm. ❝ i know. ❞ even at their worst, she was sure he'd be there for her if she'd swallow her stupid pride. ❝ i care about you, too. ❞

as much as julien wanted to remain self sufficient, never trusting anything or anyone as a crutch out of fear it could be snatched up, he couldn't deny the way maeve's hand felt in his felt like the only thing he could actually hang onto and keep himself steady. " why didn't you want me to think otherwise? " deep down, he knew, but maybe it would've been nice to hear it. " worth enough to not pretend like this conversation didn't happen after this is all over? " he quietly teased as he finally turned to look at her. " i mean yeah, that was my original plan. " he taunted sarcastically as he shook his head. " sometimes it's like you forget i care about you. "