unadulteratedhottubdeer

[unadulteratedhottubdeer]

I haven’t gotten out much lately. How do you face the world when you have an entirely new face?

Sometimes I forget. Especially when I’ve just woken up in the morning. I get out of bed, I piss in the toilet half asleep, I look in the mirror before brushing my teeth, and then I’m reminded I’m a stranger to myself.

For awhile there, I did anything I could to avoid that morning shock. I stopped brushing my teeth and bathing and going out. Just stayed in my bed and watched TV with the covers covering as much of this alien body as possible. That’s what I was doing when my doorbell rang one morning. I stayed where I was, waiting for the stranger to leave but my doorbell rang again. And again.

I padded tentatively out of my bedroom. My eyes were focused on the front door as I walked towards it, somewhat in dread of who or what could be on the other side. But also focused on the door in case my eyes accidentally found a mirror or some other shiny, reflective surface.

Slowly, I opened the door. On the other side was a handsome black man with lots of tribal-looking tattoos. “Jake,” he said. “Oh man, it happened to you, too.”

My eyes widened in shock. Jake was my name, but how could this guy know that? Jake was a super buff white guy with blond hair and a stubbly, dark beard. But that body was not the one that has opened this door— no it had to be someone else. A new roommate or foreign exchange student or another one of the possibilities I had been mulling over in my head to explain this body. This changed body of mine.

“How did you know I’m Jake? What happened to me?”

Then the man came in and explained. That he had noticed I hadn’t left my apartment in days and that something similar had happened to him. That it was not surprising to him that instead of a white gym bro opening the door, a slimmer Asian man had been behind it.

My new friend stayed for hours as we compared our situations and experiences. He came over the next day and then the next and then he started spending the night. Being with him made me more comfortable. He helped me. He forced me to clean up, to finally look into the mirror.

“Look at yourself. Look at your pale yellow skin. Your dark nipples. Your thick, black hair. Your brown, almond eyes. Your broad, flat nose.”

He tweaked my nose, that flat nose, between his thumb and forefinger. It made me smile.

“Do you see that, Jake?”

“Yes, I see all of it,” watching the face in the mirror mouth those same words.

“Who do you see in the mirror, Jake? Is that a white man, are you a white man?”

“No, it’s not. I’m not.”

“What are you, Jake?”

“I’m… I’m…,” I stared at the small mouth, i stared at the black hair, I stared into the almond eyes. My eyes.

“I’m an Asian. I’m not a white man, I’m an Asian man now.”

He pulled me into a kiss and we stumbled from the bathroom to my bed.

The next morning we talked some things over. He convinced me it was time to meet the world as my new self. To introduce the world to my new self.

I put on some of my old clothes, baggy on my new, lithe frame. I looked cute. I wasn’t handsome in the way that a football quarterback or an action movie star was anymore. But I was cute. In an Asian pop star sort of way.

Before leaving the apartment, I grabbed the obligatory face mask and put it on. In some ways grateful for the way it hid most of my new identity. I looked again in the mirror and realized it couldn’t hide everything. It couldn’t hide my eyes which were now my heritage.

Would people stare at me? Would they insult me? Would they be racist? How would it feel to be in a room where I was the only person with this almond shaped eyes? Small steps… small steps…

As we walked the sidewalk to the coffee shop, I looked at my reflection in the glass windows. I was just a guy, a guy out with his boyfriend. His beautiful, supportive Black Samoan boyfriend. And I was his cute Asian boyfriend.

We entered the chain coffee shop. My boyfriend went first. Then it was my turn. I gave my order, the one I always ordered as Jake, the white gym bro.

When I was finished, the barista asked, “Name?”

I quickly glanced at my boyfriend. Not too long, that would have been weird, but this was that next big step we had been talking about. The next step to accepting my new self. “My name is Jiang.”

Hi, it’s me again! It’s been two months since I got the chronivac, and although my new body has surpassed all my expectation, there are some people who… approve less of it than others, to say the least. Life as a half black, half samoan man has its downsides, after all. There’s this one man, Jake… well, let’s just say I need a boyfriend and I haven‘t figured out how to apply the race change effect to other people yet.

Ah damn, I should've explained that before I sent you off. You were right to come back though, let me show it to you properly this time so you know for the future!

Plus, I have a great idea for what we should do to this racist asshole. He's pretty big already, that's why he's so confident being an asshole after all, he feels like he's got the muscle to back it up. So if we take that away suddenly he's not so sure of himself.

Next is the best part, making him into what he hates. You've knocked the cocky attitude down a bit, now just swap his race to someone totally different, say Asian, and he'll be left confused as hell.

That's where you jump in to 'save the day' saying you'll help him figure out his new life if he just calms down and starts to accept that what happened can't be changed. No need to tell him it can, he doesn't need to know you were responsible.

Soon enough he'll give in and start to enjoy his new self after a while once he's used to it. He'll even change his name to be something more fitting after you persuade him it's a good idea. Goodbye Jake the bully, hello Jiang your cute Asian boyfriend.