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Together in the dark

Together in the dark

A great friend of Underlaid mentioned that when she first got together, they had to leave the cinema before the end of the film in order to get home and leap into bed. Any time I’ve been to the cinema with a boyfriend, I’ve been so engrossed in the film, that if they ever made a move on me, I’d glare at them and push them away. Poor things! I just like watching films, okay!?!

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Tug Hard

Underlaid watched a few round of Tug-of-War today. Broad-shouldered chaps pulling a big rope. Works for me.

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Naughty Girls Advertise for Free

Naughty Girls Advertise for Free

I haven’t done this for ages but I looked at the dating pages in my local newspapers that are basically divided into three; Women Seeking Men, Men Seeking Women and Gay. In the Women Seeking Men Section, there were four adverts from women seeking ‘discreet relationships.’ One actually said she was married. Anyway, in the Men Seeking Women and the Gay section there were none such adverts. What…

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Swan in Love

Do swans really mate for life? And what happens if they decide they don’t like each other? I suppose they’re screwed.

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Never Wear Mascara When You Love A Married Man

Never Wear Mascara When You Love A Married Man

Jacqueline Bisset appeared on BBC Radio 4’s Woman’s Hour today talking about her new film. She plays a very high profile woman who’s equally high profile husband cheats on her again and again. Asked for her opinion on infidelity, Ms Bisset was unequivocal; affairs are always wrong, alwaysdestructive, painful for everyone involved, and single women should never, ever embark on affair with a…

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Here's the line up of men I fancy

Here’s the line up of men I fancy

My great friend’s brother who is ten years younger than me and my total opposite in all things but is very hot.

My ex boss who is ten years older than me, very happily married but is  handsome in that rugged, countryside sort of way.

A friend who’s very cuddly

A friend who looks very like a film star who’s name I’ve forgotten

There’s a couple more but I’m not going to tell you who they are..!

Who…

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Oops

Oops http://wp.me/s3YEf2-oops

Tonight myself and two 40 something friends were out on the razzaroo. One friend sat on my soggy car seat so, as she walked through town, she looked like she’d had a little accident. My other friend had to point out that the buttons on my dress were straining against my (large) tummy. Hot stuff!

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Freedom Fighters

After talking to my friend who, by the way, is male and ten years younger than me so, there’s a couple of significant differences between us, you might say, I thought I’d examine why I too am single – and I plan to ask a few more people too so, stand by for more posts on this subject.

My childhood home backs onto fields and a river cuts through the fields, surrounded by trees. Practically from…

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Freedom Fighter

So, once again I called up my friend to probe him further on why he has ‘always felt alone.’ He dug deep for me. He said when he was working for a large-ish company, he only ever referred to it as ‘They’ as in, ‘They need to get this off to the printers by Friday…’ as opposed to ‘We need to get this off to the printers…’ It was noted and he was called up about it. He was never a team player at…

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For better or worse

For better or worse

Being single is exactly like being married. If you examine the traditional marriage vows

For better or worse

For richer or poorer

In sickness and in health

All that applies to living by yourself too. If my wages plummet or I’ve caught a cold, I can’t exactly walk out on myself, can I?

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Married life isn't everything

Married life isn’t everything

How hard is the fortune of all womankind

We’re always in fetters and always confined

Bound down by our fathers until we’re made wives

Then slaves to our husbands the rest of our lives

(Anon, 17th century poem)

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If you're unhappy in your relationship leave

If you’re unhappy in your relationship leave

I have marvelled at the sacrifice women make to keep a relationship alive. Sometimes it’s not worth it. I am an expert on being single. It’s tough, it’s lonely, I feel rejected, I feel worthless, I feel as though I will never be someone’s special person, I feel as though I am on the outside looking in on the couples-orientated society we live in. I feel desperate for affection, intimacy and sex.…

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The Grass is Always Greener

The Grass is Always Greener

BBC Radio 4 Woman’s Hour did a week long series of features on the topic of loneliness. Having asked people to tweet and email, they received a huge response but noted that the majority of men who described their experiences of loneliness were most single but women who talked about their loneliness were mainly married. I was surprised and not surprised. Having never been married, I can only…

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David Beckham

My great friend who is very happily married announced that she’d had an erotic dream about David Beckham. David Beckham is not her type! If you saw her husband you’d see why. Her husband is all sun-tanned and manly and busy single-handedly building an extention with searing efficiency. Why would she dream about David Beckham? Do married people feel guilty if they have erotic dreams which don’t…

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The cost of being alone

The cost of being alone

Singletons feel alienated from mainstream society because everything is couples orientated, from the obvious such as ‘when are you going to settle down?’ during your twenties, to ‘why aren’t you married?’ during your thirties to silent acceptance that you’re ‘not the settling down / marrying kind’ from forty and beyond. It’s not like single people ask those in long term relationships ‘So, when…

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We must've done something wrong

We must’ve done something wrong

My friend would like a serious relationship. She’s had serious relationships before and she’s had a bit of gap – two years, I think, so, now she’s feeling the pinch a little and finding life partner-less a little bit testing. In a moment of frustration she said ‘I don’t what I’ve done so wrong, even Hitler had a girlfriend!’ Hilarious but it’s an interesting point she made and I wonder where it…

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Touchy Feely

I’ve now clocked up 5 years without sex or physical intimacy and guess what I did? I had to squeeze past a male colleague who was innocently sitting at his desk and I tickled him! Mortified. I genuinely feel terrible about it. I was horrified, he was horrified and so were my other two female colleagues. What on earth possessed me to do such a thing? Is it because I am desperate for male contact…