unionize-catgirls

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"New Yorkers bite more people than sharks annually" is an excellent example of how statistics can be misleading. Like yeah no shit, do you have any idea how rare it is to even encounter a shark in the wild? They're not exactly urban animals. I'm pretty damn sure that if sharks were living in big cities like pigeons, just strolling down the streets looking for food scraps, you'd see a lot more news stories about New Yorkers biting them.

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Finally finished up this comic based on this post

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one time i hooked up with a guy and he ate my ass and jerked me off and then his boyfriend came home and was like kind of upset that he didn't get to have sex with me too. so i was like hey we can do sex that's fine by me. i can cum again. and so he's like ok lets take a shower together and ill jerk you off in the shower. and as hes jerking me off in the shower he asks if i use my phone while i shower. and i say no. and he says he always uses his phone in the shower. and sometimes he takes off the case and washes his phone with shampoo and water just for fun. and he's broken five phones this year from doing that but he's not going to stop because he just wants his phone to be clean and feel good. hes still jerking me off as he tells me about this. this is a real story you have to believe me

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Did you know that JRR Tolkien wrote an unpublished epilogue to Lord of the Rings? It's achingly, beautifully wistful in the way that only Lord of the Rings is. I revisited it recently because I'm guesting on my friends' LOTR podcast, and THAT reminded me that I drew a comic of the epilogue back in 2021 (all text is entirely canon). Anyway I thought folks on this website might enjoy it!

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OTHER?

HELLO?

yeah i drive the truck that isekais all those lonely 20yo NEETs and bored salarymen. it’s a really hard job. they keep sending me to workplace counselling after each hit. “it’s normal to feel guilt at ending someone’s life,” they say. how do i tell them that’s not what makes me feel guilty? “but it’s okay. he’ll live a better life in another world.” yeah, with 100 girls who could have lived normal lives but got drafted into being in these boring dudes’ harems. how many women’s lives have i ruined. and they don’t even know. they don’t even know

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oh that gap in my resume? i was imprisoned by the lizard king for a few years, it was a whole thing. big misunderstanding, completely exonerated. but that ties into the next item on the list, 2 years as consort to the lizard king. that was actually a volunteer situation

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“[kink] is bad because [thing the kink is based on] is bad” is such a funny take. we’re acting. you hate theater. you’re standing up in the audience and mansplaining to lady macbeth that killing people is wrong

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oon a chocolate rhubarb brownie recipe

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Going back in time to when they crucified Jesus. Not to save him (I’m pro choice) but to climb up there and feed him Ibuprofen and mini m&ms from my slightly cupped palm. like one might feed sugar cubes to a horse.

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THE LORD OF THE RINGS: THE FELLOWSHIP OF THE RING 2001 | dir. Peter Jackson

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remember when they were saying that bisexuals couldn't be butch or femme and we had to be like. deer

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