unrealisticexpectationss - Tumblr blog

[unrealisticexpectationss]

Had a horrific panic attack last night. Spilled the beans about my relapse. First thing he's gonna want is my tumblr gone. It's the right thing but I'm sad and not ready to stop losing weight.

Fuck. Just fuck.

[unrealisticexpectationss]

Nov. 8, 2021 - Body Checks : 125.7 lbs, 5'3

These pants were snug af on me back in September. My stomach has flattened out so much. Happy with my progress for sure. Need to start adding in some daily leg toning exercises. Started looking on YT for routines to follow. Any suggestions are appreciated 🖤

[unrealisticexpectationss]

Nov. 8, 2021

Pretty shocked to see I lost another 2.1 lbs over the weekend while out of town.

Can't believe I'm less than a pound away from my GW3 (125 lbs) 🖤 I literally can feel myself calming down about my weight, because it isn't so fucking high anymore and I'm further away from my HW (151 lbs when I was 11) now, and closer to my UGW.

10-15 more pounds to get back to my comfort zone. I can't deal with weighing above 120, and I'm uncomfortable when I'm over 115. I wish I could weigh under 110, but every time I get down there shit spirals and I can't maintain. Who knows, maybe it'll be different this time.

It amazes me how irrational I am about my ED. 'Oh no, this toxic behavior that I've done time and time again to trigger myself into a relaspse?? No, this won't affect me negatively, not this time. Not one bit, I assure you!' 🤦‍♀️

Oh well. Hope everyone has the best day they can 🖤

[unrealisticexpectationss]

Baggy clothes be hittin different these daysss 🖤

Starting to remember how much I love stealing my boyfriend's clothes again haha feelin smol

[unrealisticexpectationss]

Nov. 2nd, 2021

Stuck teetering around 130. I hate being on my period. I've weighed myself before and after my period and the bloating it comes with, and seen a difference of 5lbs gained and lost overnight because of water retention.

Fucking bullshit.

[unrealisticexpectationss]

Well today is an absolute trainwreck.

I'm stuck in a binge/purge spiral. Five cycles deep, and I'm not sure when I'm going to escape this fucking ride from hell.

How's everyone else doing?

ffffuuuuuuuuuucccckkkkkkkkk

[unrealisticexpectationss]

Some pics. Bought these jeans 6 weeks ago and they were super snug, now I can't wear them without a belt. And my belt now needs new holes punched in it because it's too big.

Progress 🖤

[unrealisticexpectationss]

Little bitty bit of light peeking through my thighs 🙏 mor plz 🖤

[unrealisticexpectationss]

Can't wait to be back home on Sunday. This business trip has been too long, I'm tired, I'm bored, and I don't have a scale to check my weight.

I'm pretty sure I've lost while here, but to now know for sure sucks, because I worry that I'm wrong and have gained instead.

Good times -_-

[unrealisticexpectationss]

[unrealisticexpectationss]

Sitting at dinner. Finished eating. The bathroom doors at the restaurant are propped open. Waiting to get back to our hotel. I need to get this OUT.

Edit: Got back to the hotel. Much better now.

[unrealisticexpectationss]

The traveling gods have smiled upon me 🖤🖤

Only 110 calories, vegan, I bought 3 flavors, max cal content is 130. I'm SO happy.

[unrealisticexpectationss]

10/26/21 Body Checks. I don't have a scale so idk my weight.

[unrealisticexpectationss]

[unrealisticexpectationss]

Just got depressed afff.

I'm visiting a convention center for work, last time I was here was 2 years ago.

Saw myself in the mirrors here, and just remembered how last time I was here I was like 20 lbs lighter 😪

Why does this have to take so long?

[unrealisticexpectationss]

Th1nsp0 that haunts me (I'm not into this usually, but these ones are sooo trigerring to me). Also Lily Collins is mesmerizing. Idk why.

[unrealisticexpectationss]