unremarkablegoober

[unremarkablegoober]

what’s it called when you’re so disconnected from reality that cold water doesn’t feel like anything and you can barely taste food anymore

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You ever hear that old chestnut about how most people neglect the part of the story of Icarus where he also had to avoid flying too low, lest the spray of the sea soak his feathers and cause him to fall and drown? You ever think about how different the world would be if Icarus died that way instead? If the idiom was to Fly To Close To The Sea? A warning against playing it far too safe, about not stretching your wings and soaring properly? You ever think about how Icarus died because he was happy?

[unremarkablegoober]

while you were studying girls i was kissing the blade

[unremarkablegoober]

Agates carved into orange slices by wutong_crystal_carvings.

Source: x

[unremarkablegoober]

i feel like tumblr doesnt know about the pain and suffering that is english tap water,,,, girl there are stalagmites inside me

[unremarkablegoober]

you will NEVER be able to guess what this post from the official US government consumer product safety commission was in response to (under the cut)

[unremarkablegoober]

Reddit loves just recommending random subreddits to me and this is the latest. Love the anti shrimps on land sentiment on display here

[unremarkablegoober]

I came to terms with the fact that my ex (best friend and boyfriend) doesn't miss me after he followed me around a supermarket begging to get back together while I was trying find Old Spice tampons.

[unremarkablegoober]

why am i on birthblr

[unremarkablegoober]

like whatever man

[unremarkablegoober]

"please advise" is the professional email equivalent of "girl help"

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[unremarkablegoober]

So called free thinkers when Mark jingles his keys

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[unremarkablegoober]

I had a dream a while ago that I was walking down a winding road in a forest in the middle of the night and there were several signs along the road. One of them had a picture of Dr house on it and it said “are you gay” and there were two buttons underneath labeled yes and no. And if you pressed the yes button a fire hose would spray at you

This is exactly what it looked like