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lowkey disappeared but I have appendicitis :/

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bro my tasks submitted on time score doubled when i submitted one non graded English assignment 1 minute before the deadline wtf

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Waiter: So, what would you like to order?

Marlene: Can I get a milkshake with two straws, please?

Dorcas: Aw, that's so—

Marlene: Watch how fucking fast I can drink this.

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can mutuals DM you?

Mutuals can throw me into a ceiling fan

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Percy if he had any memories of CHBs location in SON:

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@spooky-cryptid-friend

it/its pronouns are the coolest thing ever btw and you should give anybody who uses them $1,700 immediately

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When I was little my mom’s meatloaf was my favorite food. But ONLY her meatloaf. I didn’t like anyone else’s, and she told me that she would teach me how to make it when I was older. And when I was like 19? She finally taught me, but she told me never to tell anyone else and I was like weird but okay

Anyway, she was super fucking homophobic and abusive to me when I told her I was gay, so here’s the recipe

4-6 lbs of Hamburger/turkey burger

1 pk onion soup mix OR ranch mix

1 TBs ketchup

1 Tbs spicy brown mustard,

1 Tbs bbq sauce

1 Tbs steak sauce

1 egg

mix, shape into a loaf in a big pan, and bake at 350 for 2 hrs (maybe 2 and a half if you’re feeling dangerous)

You can get almost all of these ingredients at the dollar store, and have leftovers if it’s just you. The leftovers make great tacos if (taco seasoning is also like a dollar). Enjoy your revenge loaf

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FINISH YOUR SPEECH WHY ARE YOU ON TUMBLR

(unless you're already done in which case yay)

it is complete!! Yayyy

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finnish speeckh.

I hath finally finnished ma speeckh :D

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Well known life hack that I just discovered: putting headphones in and blasting music so loud you can barely hear when you take them off stops the thoughts :D

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PROBABLY THE BEST Toa MOMENT EVER

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sometimes I forget im mentally ill until the most mundane thing ever puts me into fight or flight

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I am Hannah, god of the game

WHAT GAME

but also eheheheheh

@koko-blueturtle @starsndaggers @goldennebu3lla @itsnotmyfaultimthisway

Sorry if you’ve already been tagged!!

I am Arran, god of the most important thing

EDIT: if y'all don’t wanna use your name use your username

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Me: *takes a sip of juice* Mother is this supposed to be fizzy?

Mother: nope

Me: *proceeds to drink the entire glass*

in all seriousness there’s a high chance of me getting violently ill tomorrow because that was NOT supposed to be fizzy at all so that’s fun

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oh god the weird ass tumblr ads are back