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I pretend to be lovable but I know, I know I’m not.
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My room is filled with hobbies I used to love, but now they're just collecting dust because depression stole the joy out of them. And I keep wondering when, or if, I'll ever feel that spark again for the things that used to make me happy.
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Why doesn't suicidal ideation go away even when you're having a good day. I'll be having fun n everything n randomly think "I want to kill myself" like wtf no you fucking don't whyre you lying for
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Been binge eating everything I can get my hands on all day I wanna vomit
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the devil couldn’t reach me so he made me feel like i dont belong anywhere.
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who else mourning the person they could've been if they were treated kindly as a child
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born to infodump forced to constantly worry if the other person actually cares or if im making sense or if i said something wrong or if im embarrassing myself or if they want me to stop talking or
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I don't think anyone would really be too affected if I died. Sure maybe they'd be a bit sad, but I won't actually be missed
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Argh I haven't taken a shower in like 3 weeks I feel disgusting
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It feels like whatever I say is the wrong dialogue option that makes people mad at me. Whatever I say will make them hate me. I don't know what I'm doing wrong and they won't tell me
Whys no one patient with me like holy shit man I'm trying
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Whys no one patient with me like holy shit man I'm trying
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#i really wanna kms#like geniunely i dont want to live anymore#nothing will ever get better it's a fucking scam#i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i wish i was fuvking dead i dont eant to live i want to die so badly#dont rb#tw sui ideation#tw sui talk#tw sui vent
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Reading your suicide letter from years ago is crazy lol cuz wdym this bitch wrote allat n still didn't do shit
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Sometimes I feel like when people actually fr get to know me they won't like me anymore
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First day of locking in for exam season: productive, on the grind, homework all done, revision done, not a single minute wasted
Second day: severe mental breakdown
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Can my mum go one day without fucking victimising herself
#she was out so i called her n she was like in some loud place so she couldnt hear what i was saying so i just said what i said befote in a—#- loud voice n apparantaly that was disrespectful??#crashing out so bad rn i hate her i hate her i hate her#every fucking thing i do is disrespectful everything is rude#dont rb
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