vaturivn

[vaturivn]

again, i swear the graphics and aesthetics looked much more peachy on my phone, Sigh. why is this my life. we never get to truly spend our special days together but as i said before, even if our voices were hushed and our moments together were fleeting, i’d still be happy. 

how about a little story time, my son? Kidding, you’re my baby, not my son. No, i don’t have a mommy kink, don’t make any comments... anywho. i’m gonna be a little honest about some things. they’re not necessarily bad things, but i just wanted to... come clean? yeah. 

before you were mine, i was involved with this person who had a reputation for basically fucking with a lot of people. Not like, in that way, but like fucking them over. he was jaehyun (so i’ll just call him jaehyun) and i was doyoung; i met him in an agency that i joined for fun and we never became official, but i remember truly adoring him. i took a break from the rpw and fl for about a year prior to this and when i came back, boy, was i whipped. he was persistent so i flirted with him (like how i do with everyone else, ah...) and eventually, i got attached. amid all of this, i still thought of you from time to time. i wasn’t obsessed... i just wondered how life was for you and if someone out there was treating you well. i was happy, but that never lasts, does it... daon told me that he found jaehyun extremely familiar. i find a lot of people familiar though, so i brushed it off at first but once daon started to list the similarities, Well, you can guess what happened. i’m not proud of it, but i ran away from him. without a word and all because what would i even say? “hey heard that you screw people over so i’m outtie.” jesus. i had one of the toughest weeks of my life, and i Almost went back to him because i liked him that much. but like daon said, he’d eventually hurt me in the future, and so i let go of him. i moped around for an entire week and woke up with nothing but the thought of him. i mean it wasn’t like he left me, because it was the other way around but i knew that it was for the best. with that back story in mind, and back to the present... he had found me again through a mutual friend. this was about... two weeks ago? or even three? he wanted an explanation as to why i left him and i couldn’t give him the honest truth, unfortunately. i didn’t know what to say. i no longer had feelings for him because you were all that i wanted. after talking to him again, i’d realized that my heart no longer quivered as it did before for him. i no longer smiled when he replied to me. it was as if i never liked him. i knew then, the reason why everything had changed. it wasn’t just because i had you, or because i liked you. no, it was because i was in love with you. it was because i love you. i love the silly and dorky things that you say or do. i love the smiles and the attention you direct towards me. i love that you care about me, and that you’re always there for me. i love you as a whole. now, don’t get scared because of this, ah. i just wanted to say it, because it’s been bugging me for a while and if i don’t get it out i might Die. you don’t have to say it back. we all go at our own paces. i just wanted you to know how i truly feel, dearest.  i’m sweating. Ah... anywho, happy second month, gorgeous. i adore you most.

[vaturivn]

[vaturivn]

last month i said i’d tell you more about myself once i actually remember who i even am, so, over the month, i collected these facts/details/characteristics about me just for this post. Again, if i bore you to death, don’t bother with this post...

continuing from 15. (it’s 15, right...)

16. i absolutely cannot stand straight up coffee. stuff like caramel macchiatos and white chocolate mochas are fine, but say, black coffee or americanos can Cease. coffee doesn’t work on me though—like it doesn’t get me going. pink lemonade does. aha. 17. things that scare the sh-t out of me: zombies, dinosaurs, aliens, titans (from attack on titan), the apocalypse, wendigos, and More. this one time my friend played dead island on a big screen and a zombie popped out of no where right. i screamed so fucking loud i woke up her little baby sister icb. i lost my Soul that day. honestly, i can handle gore and all, but i can’t do anything that has to do with humans being eaten alive. it’s just Really scary to me. i’m weird, i Know. 18. my favorite holiday is christmas. i love the christmas vibes and the music—it kind of triggers my long lost childhood memories. i’m starting to realize that my ‘perfect’ memory isn’t so perfect after all... 19. i have the most Vivid dreams Ever. they’re usually insane and make no actual sense—but honestly they’re pretty cool... i once dreamed about being the light blue power ranger (hahaha...) and i had to save citizens right, but i forgot about this elderly couple and there was fire and all and the room that they were in was dark so i was scared and i... just left them there... i’m Terrible, jfc. but i was scared, Okay. i have very little balls. (not literally). recently, i had a very uh, Interesting dream about you. No, nothing nsfw... i woke up and checked my phone immediately to make sure i wasn’t just imagining things but it’d turned out i was. i won’t say what happened yet, but know that it made me smile. 20. i found new games that i enjoy playing—fortnite, warframe, and star ocean. am i good at them? No, but having fun is all that matters, right... 21. my favorite fruits are strawberries and raspberries. my least favorite are pineapples and blueberries... but i like pineapples on pizza. if you don’t like pineapples on pizza we can’t be together. Just Kidding. 22. i’m good at puzzles, aha. i know this sounds lame, but i’ve always had a knack for it... along with riddles. but like, certain riddles. i was once told to solve a riddle about something being as light as a feather and i immediately answered “rock,” without question. sighs. you date a Dumbass. 23. i tend to make myself a lot more sad than others being the ones to ruin my mood. 24. i don’t watch a lot of anime, but i live for anime osts. i’m always a sl-t for osts. ha. 25. you know this, but i adore you loads and loads and Loads. interesting fact about me, right...

[vaturivn]

effulgent. lovesome. lionhearted. incandescent. scintillating.

my one and only.

[vaturivn]

our first little ‘fight’.

rize: okay first, i almost @ someone who i didn’t know, Christ. second, i know you’re not talking to me, but i miss you so i’m gonna send you a nightly (i’ve been missing s few nights, i Know...) message before i Head to bed myself. i hope you’re sleeping well, my angel. i’ll see you later, but it might be like, Later, unfortunately. have i mentioned how much i miss you? this is Ridiculous. anywho, before i end up rambling, have the sweetest dreams, baby. and if you decide that you’re still not talking to me whenever you wake up, i’ll Make you..

ellis: scribbles response on a sheet of paper. what if you realized that after you sent all the mentions, icb... i miss you too, but you didn’t hear it from me! because — you know — i’m not ‘ ‘ talking ‘ ‘ to you. and hey, it’s okay if you don’t send me messages every night. you’re a busy boy! look after yourself first. and get lots of rest. aw, it’s okay! i’ll see you when i see you. don’t forget to eat your meals and stay hydrated. you did, actually. you mentioned it at the start of your thread icb... have lovely dreams, yourself! make me how... draws an angry face at the end and signs his name. tapes the paper to your forehead, By e! 

rize: rips the paper off of his forehead to read it, shaking his head in disbelief right after. a laugh eludes from him, grabbing a pen to write his own response. alright, so you woke up and had decided that you’re still not going to talk to me. that’s Fine. two can play this game. you don’t want to talk to me? let’s see how you like it when i don’t talk to you. like you said, you didn’t hear this from me, but i miss you Loads. and that i’m not mad at you, i’m just returning the gesture. Good. Bye. Ellis. draws horns and a devil’s tail on your angry face, signing his own name on the other side of the paper of which he wrote on.

ellis: [ to : rize ] would’ve added a copyright symbol but that wouldn’t have stopped you from Stealing my Idea,,!!1! [ from : ellis ]

rize: [ seenzones. ]

[vaturivn]

on that fateful day, i’d met what i deem as fate a love that’s endless.