venusdebimbo

[venusdebimbo]

June 13th, 2024

today i dont know what to think, but i think again about the lighthouse keeper and find myself daydreaming little notions. little notions that are fiction, no doubt.

to me, they are vividly real.

in my head, a man just like the lighthouse keeper loves me. he cherishes me, the way the lighthouse keeper would don his woolen hat and canary raincoat and brave the rain for anything, he would above all risk the rain for me. he is steadfast in his loyalty, willing to work in desperate and isolated conditions because he is nothing if not a reliable man. he fears little, but change is his enemy. stability is his sweet caress.

in my head, the lighthouse keeper loves me. he pulls me closer and his long mustache tickles my face as his lips embrace mine, no words. unable to wait, he has forgotten to take his coat off-- and i think nothing of it as the raindrops are pressed into the layers of my clothes and soon onto my skin. it's his way of worming into my clothes without so much as touching a button. the lighthouse keeper does not say words, his low and forceful grunts say all he needs to say to me, i understand the rest.

in my head, i make the lighthouse keeper feel loved. the lighthouse keeper has been hurt before. that is the only fact in my story, but i will the rest to be true with all my might. when i look upon the lighthouse keeper, i see the most beautiful human i have laid eyes upon, and this is also a fact. i am lost in his sea swallow eyes. in his hypothetical kiss i hear the roar of the ocean waves. in his real kiss will i hear the same? i want his kiss to be like a conch shell, showing me the heavenly sounds of the beach no matter where i am.

in my head, the lighthouse keeper wants to fuck me. i am like a sea anemone. i am dangerous but also a place where some may seek shelter. my heart like coral, it hardens and stays that way. the inkling of the lighthouse keeper being close to me makes me tingle all over. i can feel the lighthouse keeper's stubble on my neck as he presses his lips to my ear-- it is then that i really hear the ocean. as his hands travel along my body i am engulfed by the waves and gasping for air. the unpredictable current has whisked me away. the lighthouse keeper has whisked me away. my fantasies have whisked me away.

in my head, the lighthouse keeper is in love with me.

in real life, the lighthouse keeper hardly knows who i am.

in real life, he has never met my gaze.

in real life, i might never know the lighthouse keeper.

in real life, i am alone.

[venusdebimbo]

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viable male employment:

lighting women's cigarettes

gay sex

shivering wet stray dog

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Kim Christy 1997 Calender of transgender women and female impersonators Female Mimics International 1996

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flirting is so stupid. just tell me if you're gonna dismember & cannibalize me right out the gate

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Sissy Spacek photographed by Marv Newton on the set of "Carrie", 1976

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grindr is a hell scape why do u have to fucking pay to find other trans people

“r u sure t4t” no actually I just looooove answering dumbass questions it’s my kink

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San Francisco Lesbians #8, Pleasure Productions, 1998

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SPAZ JUICE (υ◉ω◉υ)