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Imagine it's your last day alive and you're having to spend it with JD Vance 😭

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Persephone:"*holding baby Dionysus* Okay, so we're going to need baby supplies, baby food, diapers, the works."

Hades:"*pushing the shopping cart* Alright. You goget the diapers, I'll get the food, and we'll reconvene in 5 minutes."

5 Minutes Later

Persephone:"I thought you said you were getting baby food!"

Hades:"This is baby food!"

Persephone:"No, THIS *holds up baby formula* is baby food, and this *holds up bottle of alcohol* is not!"

Hades:"He's the God of wine!"

Persephone:"So you thought you were going to bottle feed him Jack Daniel's?"

Hades:"Don't be ridiculous, the whiskey is for me, I got him a nice chardonnay."

Persephone:"Hades!"

Hades:"Yeah, you're right, he's clearly a rosé kind of guy."

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These scenes together seems like Levi and Hange are looking at each other. Levi from above in the airplane and Hange from the ground 🥺

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dedicate your heart

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don’t let me be lonely [x]

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Thief X

This chapter is heavy and might hurt a bit. Heed those warnings please 😊

My Patreon [for early access to chapters and extra content]

Summary: Sometimes, dawn takes longer than usual to arrive.

Pairing: Yandere!Dabi x Psychologist!Reader.

Previous / Next

Warning: 18+ (minors DNI), daddy kink, dark themes, dirty talk, dissociation, humiliation, manipulation, noncon, oral sex, panic attack, post-traumatic stress symptoms, toxicity, unhealthy coping mechanisms, victim-blaming, yandere behaviour.

Keep reading

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Thief IX

Some dark (but juicy) goings on below.

Also, friendly reminder that I don’t have an update schedule for this story, but chapters get posted on Patreon first. After a week or so, they usually appear here 😊

My Patreon [for early access to chapters and extra content]

Summary: Oh, the things we do for reprieve.

Pairing: Yandere!Dabi x Psychologist!Reader.

Previous / Next

Warning: 18+, cum play, daddy kink, dark themes, delusional thinking, dirty talk, humiliation, manipulation, masturbation, noncon, oral sex, slight choking, toxicity, yandere behaviour.

Keep reading

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Thief VIII

Here, we start to see the early underpinnings of abuse that the poor reader is suffering from, as well as the drastic paranoia of living with someone as unhinged and cunning as Dabi 😞 big rip

My Patreon [for early access to chapters and extra content].

Summary: How much are you willing to sacrifice?

Pairing: Yandere!Dabi x Psychologist!Reader.

Previous / Next

Warning: 18+ (mdni), angst, dark themes, delusional thinking, dissociation, implied noncon, manipulation, mourning, threatening, trauma recovery, yandere behaviour.

Keep reading

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Thief VII

This one is kind of dark, so be sure to heed the warnings below 😊 Things are getting dire for poor reader.

My Patreon [for early access to chapters and extra content].

Summary: He wants something else for breakfast.

Pairing: Yandere!Dabi x Psychologist!Reader.

Previous / Next

Warning: 18+, dark themes, delusional thinking, dirty talk, dubcon, manipulation, misogyny, noncon, threatening, toxicity, victim-blaming, yandere behaviour.

Keep reading

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Thief VI

This is a bit more detail-oriented so that we can get some plot progression going on in here 😎 Here’s a peek at this man’s distorted thinking.

My Patreon [for early access to chapters and extra content].

Summary: Who the fuck do you think you are, expecting a psychopath to express genuine empathy?

Pairing: Yandere!Dabi x Psychologist!Reader.

Previous / Next

Warning: 18+ (minors dni), angst, dark themes, death, delusional thinking, grieving, misogyny, mourning, noncon touching, panic attack, threatening, trauma, yandere behaviour.

Keep reading

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Thief V

Here we are! I’m gonna preface this by saying it’s very, very dark. Here, we get a glimpse into some of Dabi’s disordered thinking. If you aren’t comfortable with themes of spousal or child abuse and victim-blaming, then I would suggest turning away from this.

My Patreon [for early access to chapters and extra content].

Summary: Shit. Does he really make you that sick?

Pairing: Yandere!Dabi x Psychologist!Reader.

Previous / Next

Warning: 18+, child abuse, dark themes, delusional thinking, dirty talk, justification of abuse, manipulation, mentioning of abuse and sexual assault, misogyny, noncon fingering, potential spoilers, slut-shaming, toxicity, threatening, victim-blaming, yandere behaviour.

Keep reading

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Thief IV

Here, we get a good look at reader’s state of mind. The next chapter will deal more with how Patchy sees things 😊 Then, we can finally get to the really good shit.

My Patreon [for early access to chapters and extra content].

Summary: Aren’t you going to say good morning to him with a sweet little peck on the cheek and a fresh pot of coffee? Just be a good girl and send the cops away, first.

Pairing: Yandere!Dabi x Psychologist!Reader.

Previous / Next

Warning: 18+, angst, blackmail, death, dirty talk, intense grieving, mourning, noncon elements, sexual themes, threatening, trauma aftermath, yandere behaviour.

Keep reading

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Thief III

The third chapter is insanely detail-oriented because I wanted to get a bunch of questions out of the way and get to the good bits 👏 

My Patreon [for early access to chapters and extra content].

Summary: Dabi didn’t do all this because he’s in love with you. Get over yourself.

Pairing: Yandere!Dabi x Psychologist!Reader.

Previous / Next.

Warning: 18+, breaking and entering, death, delusional thinking, dirty talk, hostage situation, mention of suicide, mourning, misogyny, noncon touching, threatening, toxicity, violence, yandere behaviour.

Keep reading

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Thief II

It’s a longfic, folks! I’m going to continue this. 

I listened to music while writing this time around. I don’t usually, but like, I wanted to see if it would work. The songs you see below are the ones I was listening to while writing this. I’ve also included this playlist.

Special thanks to @katslutski for making sure this was coherent before I posted it 🙏 whatta blessing of a person.

My Patreon [for early access to chapters and extra content].

Summary: Your fiancé was in the way. He needed to go.

Pairing: Yandere!Dabi x Psychologist!Reader.

Previous / Next.

Warning: 18+, angst, breaking and entering, death, delusional thinking, implied hostage situation, mourning, sexual themes, violence, yandere behaviour.

Inspiration: Thief.

Keep reading

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Thief I

Someone sent in an ask for yandere Dabi in a psychiatric hospital (not a psycho hospital lmao jeez it’s 2021 guys), so here it is! Working with patients in a psychiatric ward irl can be pretty wild sometimes, so it was cool to kind of overexaggerate that experience with this little angsty shit.

My Patreon [for early access to chapters and extra content].

Summary: You’re the only one who can calm him down. You’re the only one he’ll talk to. It’s too bad his compliance comes at a hefty price, one that you aren’t aware of until it’s too late.

Pairing: Yandere!Dabi x Psychologist!Reader.

Next.

Warning: 18+, delusional thinking, implied dubcon/noncon, implied kidnapping, power dynamic, violent thoughts, yandere behaviour.

Inspiration: Thief.

Keep reading

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russian roulette ♡ the scenes where they tried to kill each other (for anon)