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THE EVENING STAR.     y/n?

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THE EVENING STAR. today i used a game disc as a mirror to apply mascara.

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it’s about us. about the people we’ve LOST through time, and how we handle that loss. the guilt of still being ALIVE when they are not, and the HOPE that they might only be sleeping,

              maybe still dreaming, under the stars.

indie pathfinder ryder  //  penned by honey

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akashena.

The crowd was buzzing and a slew of people were swaying back and forth, thumping to the music with their mugs raised high and froth spilling haphazardly on the floor. The Vortex was packed, filled to the ceiling, and Reyes was with another glass of–what was it again? The Dirty Squirrel? Whatever. With enough drinks, maybe he’d forget the name.

“Pathfinder! It’s all you can drink, thanks to you!” a man roared. Reyes turned his head and, in the distance, was Sophia in a sea of raving people trying to shove her forward. He had to wink. For old time’s sake. 

“Ryder–You and that perfect timing of yours,” he said, flashing his usual half-smile. “Thought I might find you here.”

          lexi had ORDERED the pathfinder to “take it easy” after dying for a THIRD time. the asari would have had a fit if she knew ryder was slumming it up in a nightclub. sophie liked the vortex, and its amaranthine atmosphere. she liked times like this: times where NOTHING really mattered and all was a BLUR of intoxication and warmth.

          what she didn’t like was people in her FACE. if she was to be celebrated as something almost holy, she wanted to do it without people running up HER tab. then again: it didn’t matter, and she went back to liking her surroundings. jammed up against the bar, counter DIGGING into her side ( if it hurts, she doesn’t notice ), a familiar voice lingered at her side as she GRIPPED an entire bottle of blue liquor. head canted, and she replied with naught but a similar ( yet subtle ) grin before sipping at her commandeered drink.

          ❛ i do have perfect timing, don’t i? ❜ she was DRUNK, voice wavering as she spoke. the smallest bit of arrogance in her voice was ODD upon her tongue, but she thought it might be fitting at this moment.  ❛ it’s all over for now. of course i’m going to try and KILL everything that happened. ❜

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THE EVENING STAR.     i updated my rules with a new section. please check it out. 

also i’m gonna be out in like ten minutes, possibly for the rest of the week.

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Mass Effect: Andromeda + Planets

[Part 1/?]

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dosashaan.

     ❛  you think i don’t know what it’s  like  to be happy ?  ❜    looming irritation rankles between his shoulders.  still,  he keeps the practice,  perfected poise of  soldier;  of calm.   his jaw is cord   & stretched tendons looped around his cheekbone,  caught up in the knotting of old scars.  he can still feel them,  freshly split,  when he speaks.    ❛  i remember,  every day,  intimately,  what it’s  like  to be loved.  to love.  to angara,  that  is happiness.  maybe  that’s why i’m  here,  fighting  this war, so that,  one day,  no angara will ever fear that their  happiness  will be taken from them.  why i’m angry  that another son,  brother,  father –—  was taken,  needlessly,  for a machine.  ❜ 

he grits against the back of his teeth.  enamel  SMASHES  against its molar mate in the beginnings of a growl that rolls,  punctuates his words. 

     ❛  akksul  wants  war  with your people.  i’m the only reason he doesn’t have it,  for the moment.  ❜ in the breath-gulped silence before he continues,  he grabs hold of the pause.     ❛  still –—  there may come a day when i’m forced to choose between your people and the roekaar.  before you make that an  easy choice,  ask yourself:  how ready are you to throw your scientists,  civilians,  your children  against those who have been war-trained for a hundred years ?  how much  life  is worth a few insults ?  your  pride ?  ❜

     ❛  i won’t have my tolerance  taken for granted,  pathfinder.  and neither will aya.  ❜

          ❛ and you think i don’t know that i took a life? ❜  what she sees — hears — it is VISCERAL and splayed over the table. an animal LIMPING on the side of the road, and ryder feels like the KID she is.  ❛ so you remember. so you know what joy is. and you CONSUME it. you eat it and choose to hate anything that is STRANGE to you. i can understand DISTRUST — i always have, and you have EVERY right to want all of us GONE. but i do not understand the raw, disgusting HATRED you have for so much. i TRY to understand and you tell me of my mistakes that i am VERY aware of and i have to dig my fingers in and pull it out by becoming PETTY and you despise me and everything i do even more. or tolerate me LESS — whatever. ❜

          pathfinder inhales SHARPLY, dizzy from projected and USELESS monologue. she does not notice her whitened knuckles: copper skin pulled taught and tense.

          ❛ keep your THREATS. make it real if our destruction will comfort you in some gross way. we ALL left the milky way prepared to  D I E. we all had some kind of deathwish based on HOPE, and it’s all stupid LUCK that we’re still alive. i will keep my petty insults because they are the ONLY thing allowing me to me dig in and UNDERSTAND. ❜

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mouthful of white hot fire, tongue coated in poison, ragged nails painted in my own blood; there’s a hunger in me, something vicious a thirst to be celestial, godly, divine–      and yet.

aphelion | a.w. (via hermionee)

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Yet we push it just the same.

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TAGGED BY :  @chaordiic ( thank you for tagging me! ;w; ) RULES :  i erased this accidentally oops TAGGING :  lol

MUSE.

name :  sophia marie ryder /  nickname :  sophie, ryder /  zodiac sign :  leo /  gender :  cis-female /  favorite colour:  the super specific color of the deep ocean /  average hours of sleep :  a full eight hours if not more. she is SO extremely lazy when she’s not scoping out planets and fixing everyone’s issues.  /  last thing you googled :  it was probably either porn or a cheesecake recipe tbh  /  height:  5′7″

MUN.

name :  honey  /  nickname :  honey  /  zodiac sign :  aquarius /  gender :  cis-female  /  favorite colour:  teal  /  average hours of sleep :  not enough lmao  /  last thing you googled :  brand new lyrics i think  /  height : like 5′1″ :v

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THE EVENING STAR.     i've decided that sophie is the equivalent of mary magdalene sitting on the porch of a trailer with a cigarette hanging from her mouth.

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“ are you calling me a liar ? “

*:・ﾟ⁺✧ ≺ the song of achilles starters ≻

          ❛ i ain’t callin’ you a truth-er. ❜  a silly grin tugs at her lips: cage of teeth holding back a lissome chuckle. she briefly considers NEVER venturing into the ass-end of liams vid hoard ever again. call-backs to “vintage” one-liners weren’t ever noticed — especially by people who felt QUESTIONED.  ❛ look. i didn’t exactly call you a LIAR. but — i did say you were purposely telling a maybe true, maybe not, story to deflect a question. ❜

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asarireject.

          ❛  no  matter  WHAT  I  DO ,  i  can’t  seem  to  make  this  little  guy  grow …  ❜  frustration  falls  predictably  from  cora’s  lips  as  studies  the plant ,  fingertips  tenderly  - nay ,  lovingly -  brushing  its  leaves.  as  if  that  might  bring  them  back  to life.  ❛  c’mon ,  you  didn’t  travel  all  the way  TO  HELEUS  not  to  survive.  ❜   alright  —–  now  she’s  talking  to  the  plant  again.

          ❛ y’know, i heard a long time ago that plants like classic rock. ❜  much over six-hundred years ago — “a long time” was an UNDERSTATEMENT. funny — how frozen sleep felt like naught more but a few seconds. pathfinder leans gingerly against a tank holding STRANGE specimens. bugs, or perhaps crustaceans: she isn’t sure. eyes linger on a very specific fern: one that seems to DRIP from the soil it resides in.  ❛ i’m sure liam could hook your green buddies up with something. maybe a hair band? ❜

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roasting me is ineffective because you can’t tell me worse things than i already think of my self already