im vince and I cry about grumpy dads and their soft wives. I live for Cid Highwind 32, UK, she/they
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
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Today in niche genres of joke that I can never get enough of and will probably still be secretly thinking about four years later




#thats me in a corner is my favourite#second only to peter kays dancing queen eating chinese with mr bean
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If my mother asks me one more time how I am we are going to fall out I am so sick of it leave me alone I'm talking about a garden centre how I am has nothing to do with it
#youre getting overbearing mother i am going to turn my phone off i swear to god#people see our car gone and Start Assuming and im going to go feral#if we didnt need them for photos and music i would have them off in the ward i swear to god#its nice that so many people care and are invested and want the good news but yall are getting invasive#thank god they ask him how i am because ill start biting
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head hurts less
#borat voice ma waiyfe#look at how pretty my friend is my darling my love my aphrodite#i love you bitch i aint ever gonna stop loving you bitch
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Putting the gow theme on the playlist to give me Strength and Power to get through this shit when it comes
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Me: the washing machine won't start?
My man, who is being so gentle and not treating me like a moron even tho I blatantly am: it's saying you need to lock it? [Gets on his knees 2 mins after waking to press all the buttons]
Me, after 30 seconds: ....the door's open.
Him:
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if you're writing and find yourself thinking 'this is too weird/gross/offputting/esoteric/ambitious/catered to my specific interests + sure to push away a broader audience' that is the devil speaking and it is a lie. you are already firmly on the right path and you need to double down
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God it's almost a real person they're getting more advanced
Shame their Tumblr has like five pictures that are all slop
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I'd rather hang out with someone who keeps accidentally calling me slurs but treats me like a person, than someone who actively polices every word anyone says and acts like belonging to a marginalised group is my only redeeming quality as a person.
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Now overdue so trying the long walk hack and now my feet hurt and I'm wet because it pissed it down five minutes from home like thanks
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Somebodys dog is barking and it sounds exactly like the enemy in gow:r you have to hit from behind or they hide and I'm so ready to get some resources
#it has been barking non stop for a good ten minutes#its owner has hollered at it to shut up three times and nothing has changed#its just going for ut it has been bothered
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Spin this wheel first and then this wheel second to generate the title of a YA fantasy novel!
(If the second wheel lands on an option ending with a plus sign, spin it again)
Share what you got!
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