w4lbo

[w4lbo]

“but my girlfriend said she’d break up with me if I started hrt…” FUCKING LEAVE HER THEN!!

[w4lbo]

LISTEN UP MOTHER FUCKERS

SEE THIS WEBSITE? 

ITS CALLED WOLFRAM ALPHA

THIS IS THE BEST GODDAMN WEBSITE FOR ACADEMIC SHIT. FUCK GOOGLE. 

THIS MOTHERFUCKER WILL LET YOU SEARCH “HOSPITAL BEDS IN CHAD VS. IRAN” 

AND IT GIVES YOU A STRAIGHT GODDAMN ANSWER 

MAYBE YOU’RE NOT INTERESTED IN DOCTORNESS OF THIRD WORLD COUNTRIES COOL SHIT 

HAVING TROUBLE WITH MATH?

HOLY SHIT

OR MAYBE YOU WANNA DICK AROUND

WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU WANT

[w4lbo]

When somebody shares a quote by a famous author like it's something the author personally said and believed, but you know it was actually spoken by a character you're not supposed to like... 😐

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My cats wanted to fight again and I wasn't letting them but the passion in their eye contact suggests they started fighting telepathically

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when your stomach is really mad at you and you're not sure which one of your fourteen unhealthy lifestyle choices is causing it

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if any minors are following me

always make sure to start forging parents' signatures on the first day of class. that way, your teachers won't know that you've been forging signatures for the rest of the year

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Reached out to a biologist to request some info about an extinct species of freshwater shrimp and the email she sent in response was not only lovely and helpful but also kind of poetry to me? People who study invertebrates are actually the most hopeful and compassionate scientists that we have.

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I can’t make pasta any more without mumbling to myself, “wet the drys… then dry the wets…”

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This.

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Is your entire name just a front so people call you puki (pooky) because you dont feel validated by your own partner?

My username predates the nickname pookie. Does the name "doktor schruum" have to do with the fact that physicians keep finding strange fungal infections on your testicles?

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it's sorta funny (ignoring the horrors) that cis people can't be trusted with a deadname. any time someone tells me theirs I've forgotten it five minutes later, if you had names for your toes that would be far more interesting to me, but cis people get real "if you give a mouse a cookie" about it it

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How the fuck am I supposed to meet a fellow lesbian and then convince her to date me

Don't know anything about lesbians, but maybe if you walked around carrying a baseball bat that'd be really bad ass.

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I am bisexual, bipedal and bi myself

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wait u have a gf? how the fuck did you pull

I have many qualities