wade-the-tripper - Tumblr blog

[wade-the-tripper]

katarinaxporter:

@withsketch-andgrace​

She could feel herself tense up as the situation proceeded, she never was a good liar - not that she was a liar - but it explained why she wasn’t doing so good, or at least she thought so in her mind.

A soft sigh, one that couldn’t be heard by either party around her, escaped her lips as the officer’s hand moved away from his holster; somewhere her eyes were lingering as the two spoke to each other. She figured he could probably tell she was nervous about his hand being so close to his gun, the way her eyes went a tad wide when he hovered around it in the first place. 

She coughed and nodded her head. “Yes.. in fact he is.” Kat couldn’t think of any other explanation as to how the two knew each other, or the reason why they were so close in proximity so she had to go with it.  “He’s, he’s having renovations done and I told him he could stay with me since the rest of our family lives several miles West of here.” Katarina knew there was always construction going on around the city so it wouldn’t be a complete lie. 

The girl mentally rolled her eyes at the two males, they were being typical. She spoke up, “I think it’s best I get him back inside.. I don’t believe being out here much more is going to help him get rid of this bug.” 

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@torixrps​

“...Alright.”

Wade held back his snort, mostly because it might double him over. This jackass wasn't just a fucking cop, he was a dumbass, too. He'd listened to the bitch's babbling with eyes narrowed, and Wade was sure that they were fucked. Colorful curses for the stupid slut pushed up through the slog in his mind. He'd find her when they released him, shake her 'til her head clanged like his was right fucking now. That slow drawl of a word had saved her worthless ass!

“I can help you bring him inside, if you want. Maybe -”

“No!” Wade's knees buckled as he barked, but he caught himself, groaning as the world tilted once more. He forced a tiny shake of his head, vomit held in by sheer fucking luck. The cop locked eyes with him. Wade gave the asshole the deadliest glare he could muster. Fuck, a real uncle would be proud.

The dick looked back at the girl for a minute, lips parted to say more, but then his gaze slid back to good old Uncle Wade and he stepped back. The jackass settled his hands on his hips and addressed Wade’s savior. 

“Well, I'll be watching as you get in. Call out if you have any trouble.”

Hangovers & Hand ups

[wade-the-tripper]

katarinaxporter:

@withsketch-andgrace​

She shook her head at his growl; he just wasn’t going to give this up, was he? Katarina was a stubborn girl herself, that was evident in this situation, but this man had to of topped the cake of the most stubborn person of the century. 

As if on queue, Kat heard the same voice as the man next to her had heard. She looked up at the officer as he made his way to the two of them. Her eyes took him in for a moment, trying to place if she knew him and him her. Different excuses going through her head so as to try and get out of this one, not quite sure if knowing the man would help or not. 

Once the officer was closer, she noticed where his hand was hovering by his holster. One wrong move and Kat could get the man next to her hurt and that was the last thing she wanted. She felt his grip tighten on her and could feel his eyes on her. “N-no sir,” she stuttered by accident, but quickly covering her tracks. “I tried telling him that he just couldn’t go to work today with as bad as the flu is and wouldn’t you know, he didn’t listen very well,” Kat added a giggle. “We were just headed back to the apartment.” 

@torixrps​

Wade remained silent, ducking his head to wince at her stutter. These Goody-two-shoes whores, they could never get shit right! He steeled himself for the clang of handcuffs around her wrist when he heard her giggle. The cops hand seemed to melt away from his holster, and the hard edge in his eyes softened to a gleam Wade was more than familiar with. Fuck, again.

“Uh huh,” the cop drawled, his gaze sliding from her to Wade and back again with narrowed eyes. “So...is he your uncle?”

Wade bit his tongue to keep from really telling this dickhead who he was - maybe attempt not to get them into more trouble by really barfing on the man’s uniform. Definitely fishing between the bitch’s legs.

“Go...now,” he ground out, wanting to kick his own ass for how feeble he sounded. He glared at the horny cop, who returned the favor right back at him. Hey, he might’ve given the stupid bitch to the douche-bag himself, if she wasn’t his one-way ticket out of this mess. Cock-blocking, it was.

Hangovers & Hand ups

[wade-the-tripper]

katarinaxporter:

She studied him as he tried to get up off the dirty pavement once more. She wondered if perhaps she should just leave him be - that’s what he wanted was wasn’t it? For her to just leave him there: hungover, puke-ridden, soon to be baking on the hot pavement - not entirely sure where he was, or so she assumed. If she were anyone else, she probably would’ve just left him there, especially this neighborhood - people were stuck up and snooty and if it were someone else who had ran across him, they’d either look the other direction or call the police. But she was the one to cross paths with him and Kat was a different sort of person in these parts. She wanted to help people - him - and that’s what she was going to do. So, her hands stayed in place, ready to steady him if need be as he attempted to stand himself up. 

A flinch passed her body as he growled at her, though she did not move herself. As he tried to say something, her eyes grew wide as she realized what was happening. The man was falling yet again however this time he used her as a balance; lashing out and latching onto her, a loud gasp escaping her before she could get a hold of her surprise. She hung on to him as best she could, trying to steady the both of them so he wouldn’t fall yet again and she wouldn’t tumble with him. She cleared her throat and spoke softly, not answering his question but asking her own. “Are you going to let me help you, now?” 

@torixrps​

Another growl left him at her question, as much from head pain as from her being a pain in the ass. Wade’s jaw worked as he tried to untangle his thick tongue and clearly recite the ugly words he wanted to spit in her face. He was almost there when another voice rang in the air. Wade winced, his shoulders hunching towards his pissed-off ears.

“Hey! You!”

Wade groaned. Of fucking course - right on time, because why the fuck not? The hard clop of shoes hurrying across the pavement clanged in his head, making him cringe the closer it drew to them.

“He giving you trouble, miss?”

The new, gruff voice came with a double-vision of an asshole in blue. The familiar sight made Wade want to vomit all over again, this time voluntarily - he was sure there was more in there, especially for this dickhead. He didn’t have time for cops trying to play hero for pussy and he definitely didn’t have the goddamn money for bail. The douche’s hand hovered by his holster, and Wade’s grip tightened on the girl as his eyes flashed her way. She wanted to fucking help? Well, here was her chance. She better make it fucking good, too.

Hangovers & Hand ups

[wade-the-tripper]

wade-the-tripper:

katarinaxporter:

Katarina tried her best not to let the vomit overtake her senses more than it already had. If there was one thing Kat couldn’t handle, it was vomit - strangely enough the only thing that kept her from doing what she really wanted to do with her life, which was become a registered nurse - her stomach just wasn’t strong enough and she was definitely being tested. 

Her hand stayed on him for a moment as he still struggled on the heated cement, her mind convinced that he was getting ready to stand and let her help in the messy process. A sharp inhale inadvertently was omitted from the petite female, mostly due to shock from the male’s reaction. Most would’ve been thankful and let her help but this one, he was different, stubborn. Instantly her hand was off of him, her left foot taking a small step back followed by her right.

She sighed, unsure of what to do or say in order to convince him to let her help him off the dirty, now puke ridden, sidewalk - the situation only getting worse as he fell back down, his hands landing in the muck. Kat bent down, though careful not to place her hands on him this time. “Why won’t you just let me help you?” she inquired softly. “Do you even know where you are?”

@torixrps​

She just couldn’t take a fucking hint, could she? Wade dragged his palms along dry pavement and heaved up onto his knees, kneeling like some kind of drunk altar boy. His upper body swayed and he would have fallen face first again if he hadn’t put his hands out, the rough impact on his palms making him grunt. Not only annoying, but a stupid bitch too - great at a bar; fuck-all on the street. He threw another growl her way in response to her dumb-shit questions and slowly, achingly made his way to his feet. The sun was still a son of a bitch, but at least now Wade could look down at this useless cunt - the two of her. Shit. Wade felt the water sloshing in his knees, making them wobble, but he jabbed a finger in her direction - one of her directions.

“If you’re not gonna-”

show me your tits or suck my dick, you can’t fucking help. It would have been the perfect line to make little miss helpful get the fuck out of his face, if only his legs hadn’t chosen that moment to screw him over. He felt himself starting to sprawl and he lashed out, latching onto her as he struggled to control himself. 

“There a problem, miss?”

Hangovers & Hand ups

[wade-the-tripper]

katarinaxporter:

It was like her feet were glued to the pavement as she stood there examining the male. She was partially afraid of him - and by partially she meant fully. Even though he was clearly obliterated and Katarina was nowhere near familiar with the effects of alcohol, Kat knew enough that the scenario with which was playing out could end badly for herself. Perhaps he couldn’t understand what she was saying and he could potentially start swinging fists, thinking the tiny girl was actually someone trying to mug him. Or maybe he had a gun handy and could fumble around with it just enough to shoot her - maybe nowhere vital but shoot her nonetheless. These thoughts were swarming in her head as if they were something she thought about frequently.

She was surprised at the amount of time it took the man to respond, and even then it wasn’t much - a low growl. “I only want to help you, sir,” she spoke up ever-so softly, so as to show him she was not a threat of any sort - she was about as threatening as a baby penguin, a thing her mother used to tease her about all the time. 

Katarina stumbled back a bit as she noticed him forcing himself onto his hands and knees, though still ready to help him up if so desired. But before she could think about bending over to help him, she heard a muffle of a word and then the sound of someone vomiting. On instinct, her nose scrunched up at the awful smell, her own weak belly protesting from the sight and odor that clogged her senses. Gagging a bit, she still felt sorry for the man as she hesitantly put a hand on his shoulder, her selflessness still in tact. “We should get you cleaned up.”

Wade spit the last bit of vomit out on the pavement, jaw working to get the putrid feeling out of his mouth. His head was still doing its best impression of a smashed watermelon, and he knew better than to think this was the complete end of the wretching. Spewing just came with the drinking, two old fuck buddies, and who was Wade to try to tear them apart? He groaned again, body swaying. Spewing was still a fucking bitch.

He cracked open his eyelids and winced against the sunlight, a full hundred times brighter than it had any fucking right to be. Breathing heavy, Wade focused on trying to stand - until he felt her hand on his shoulder. Fucking perfect. This annoying bitch just wouldn’t leave him the fuck alone. At this point, he’d take a cold water and a couple bucks just to see the end of her. He jerked away from the light touch, wobbling a bit on all fours as he snapped at his would-be savior.

“Offa me!”

Against his head’s wishes, he swiveled his neck to look at her, the sun giving her a heavenly outline that he didn’t have time for this morning. She looked like a co-ed; the kind that got wasted and might let him cop more than a few feels on a Friday night. Any other time, he might try to bang her, but they weren’t in a club and he couldn’t provide the drinks. His stomach lurched at the mere thought, and Wade inhaled sharply to keep anything from coming out. He tried pushing from his knees to his feet, but his legs gave out beneath him and he was once again sprawled on the pavement, hands a little wet from his own mess.

Hangovers & Hand ups

[wade-the-tripper]

katarinaxporter:

The smell of coffee illuminated Katarina’s senses as she made her way through her small apartment, getting herself ready for the day ahead of her. It was a routine the young girl had grown to love; Setting her coffee maker the night before to run at exactly the same time each morning only to fill it with two small packets of sugar and four pumps of hazelnut creamer. She always teased her mother of how horrible coffee tasted and she was sure her mother was chuckling in her grave, saying how much she told her so and that coffee truly was a god-send. If only Kat would’ve listened to her mother when she was around.

A chuckle made its way past her own lips as she reached the door to her apartment, her small cat looking up at her with such sad eyes - a sight she knew all too well. “It’s okay, Oreo.. you know I’ll be back,” she petted him, perhaps a bit too long before she shut the door behind her to leave him to his own adventures for the day. Shaking her head, she locked the door behind her and started down the stairs. Though there was an elevator, Kat lived on the second floor and didn’t deem it a necessity for herself.

“Good morning, Troy,” she exclaimed, a cheery smile on her face. He was one of the elder’s who lived downstairs that she ran into every morning and there never was a day where the two didn’t greet each other. After the two exchanged pleasantries, Katarina stepped outside, her eyes squinting ever so slightly at the brightness of the morning sun. A fraction of a frown set itself upon her face as she caught the whiff of something off. She hadn’t been around it a lot - never, actually - but she had just enough knowledge to know that the male who was laying on his stomach reeked of alcohol and by the obvious signs, was more than just hungover.

She hesitantly made her way to him but stopped in her tracks when his words slurred. It took her a moment to piece them together before she realized what he had said to her. Part of her wanted to just leave him there for someone else to deal with; he was a stranger and the likes of him never usually made their way close to home but a bigger part of her was telling her to help him. If she didn’t help him, something worse could happen to the man and she couldn’t let that happen. Katarina spoke up softly, sighing under her breath, “I just.. I just wanted to see if you needed help is all.”

Shit. He said the magic words at great cost, and suddenly a shadow overcame the sunbeams waiting to destroy him. His body wasn’t going anywhere, but Wade’s eyelids cracked open in the safety of that shadow. Dumb shit move. His world tilted, stomach sloshing around like some fucked up baby in a bathtub. He shut his eyes and risked another deep groan, holding his breath to stave off the alcohol revolution in his gut. Only his petrified stillness allowed him to hear the voice of an angel, and the one word that sent a shiver up his spine - fucking help.

Oh, shit. Shit. Wade pressed his cheek further into the ground, not giving a fuck if the small rocks cut him. Where were the police when you fucking needed them? Their bullshit, or a dog pissing nearby, or shit, even a fucking car blasting bullshit right beside his fucking ear would be better than this - the good Samaritan. A warning growl hummed deep in his throat, the pain just a given at this point. This type was the absolute fucking worst - called the fucking ambulance so he could rack up a bullshit emergency room bill, then offered him coffee like they hadn’t cost him a shit ton of money. Or worse, dumped him at some local homeless place like he was a fucking stray dog. OK, he smelled like shit and he was lying on the ground, but one thing Wade knew - he didn’t look that bad, cleaned up or not. He was only missing one tooth in the back where no one could see, and did a ton of physical labor so he wasn’t a fat ass. They could keep their bleeding heart help. They just wanted to take out the trash.

Fuck if he knew how, but Wade shook as he forced himself onto his hands and knees. His jaw unhinged, stomach raging in protest while he sucked in enough air to support his next move. Eyes still shut, he tilted his head in the general direction of his angel’s voice and spoke as clear and loud as he could manage in his given condition.

“Fuck-” But that was as far as he got in his screed before his tummy took over, spewing its own violent tirade on the pavement.

Hangovers & Hand ups

[wade-the-tripper]

Hangovers & Hand ups

@torixrps

Fuck.

That was the only thing Wade could think, and even that stung like a bitch. He was vaguely aware that his bristled cheek pressed against something cold, hard and gritty, not the huge, soft tits he’d been hoping to wake up on when he’d stumbled into the titty bar last night. Two really nice sets of jugs and a loud cheer flashed before his mind went static, and Wade ground his teeth together as his stomach flipped on itself trying to fill in the rest of the night’s story. If he wasn’t careful, every drink he’d had and some shit he hadn’t would spill right out of his dumb-fuck mouth. 

Wade groaned and immediately regretted it, the sound reverberating through him and causing its own special brand of hell. If he’d had any strength, he would have screamed bloody murder and told his ex-wife Hannah to go fuck herself. Just like every month, she took as much of his paycheck as she could get her cunt hands on. The government and his bills took the rest, so Wade liked to use the pennies he had for himself to send them all a big fuck you in the form of getting wasted. Being wasted was being king of the whole fucking world - grabbing all the T&A a man could get his hands on, making friends with the whole fucking bar and finding some sloppy little slut to take home at the end of the night (or in the bar bathroom or alley, whatever). King! Wade attempted to move one leg and a slurred curse passed through his lips. He thought he felt his knee hit this hard surface - probably the ground - and could only conclude that he was laying on his stomach. He ground his teeth tighter against each other and kept his eyes shut tight. He could handle this stomach shit, lay flat for a little while as long as the fucking cops didn’t catch him. But the sun beamed bright beyond his eyelids, inviting him to take part in the day.

“Fugg awhf,” he slur-growled, letting another bout of leaden pain wash over him. Fuck the day.

[wade-the-tripper]

“You’ve got that James Dean daydream look in your eyes…” -Style

[wade-the-tripper]

Taylor Kitsch by Greg Williams