waffles-and-momos - Tumblr blog

[waffles-and-momos]

A Letter to You!

Hey Love!

Been a while since I could write to you about all the "nice things".

How's your place been?

I have noticed how your smile has widened since you stepped in here. It speaks, of how badly you craved this change.

The past six months have been tough, I wonder how you managed it, but you did. You did just enough to deserve this treat for you.

You look so much more open when I see you grazing the street dogs or anyone else's pet dog when I see you talk with the locals there to get your necessities and not to forget that cute little "Good night" "Hi" "Good Morning" "Bye" to the people there, all of it with a wide end smile and a bit little shy, I don't know maybe confused if they'll reciprocate back in the same way or if you are overdoing it, but just doing it cause you want to.

I see you waking up at 6 in the morn, making your own breakfast, eating what suits you not what is given to you, getting your work done anyhow cause that really really makes you feel good, and gives you a peaceful sleep to wake up the next day with the courage, knowing you are doing it. And no doubt the friends you make and connecting at your own pace. Haaaaa. Feels heavenly doesn't it?

It's not the same, as the girl I used to see every day, every morning and night in the hostel. She used to get up in the morning so that we could have breakfast together. She used to shower so that we could shower together. She used to walk, workout, or work so we could do shit together. Everything she did was more because she wanted to have it with me. Whereas, what she needed was that exact space for herself, doing it for her sanity. And she is.

I look up to you V. I really do, I know you won't believe it but it's true. And I'll keep looking out for you, to be with you, because eventually that was, is, my happiest space.

I have seen at least 3 different phases of you this year, hostel, home, Blore, and by far this is where I have seen you the happiest.

You just needed a little help from yourself to put the pieces together for you. And a cheering voice out there to let you know that- You are doing Great!

Don't worry about parents being grasped for life cause that's a matter of time when it won't even be a thing. Once you get a grasp on your life, no one else gets the chance. I repeat NO ONE ELSE.

Exams are like seasons they come and go but do they ever settle for all the time? No right. It's okay to get a bit stressed in work life, lets you know that you care about your growth, but don't ever take it to your heart. You'll have uncountable opportunities trust me. You literally have crossed one of the toughest hurdles you had all your life, do you think you really need to care about anything else?

You will definitely have your share of ups and downs but know that downs are temporary and ups are a pleasure to live with.

Lastly, people say we should always have something to come back to. Home they say, doesn't necessarily have to be your hometown, can be placed under a bridge, a bar where you meet your best friend, a street where you love wandering, anything. The one that you create for yourself with or w/o people, definitely with things that matter to you, a space of yours that you crave to be in when the day ends, when you are tired when you want to have your emotions out, know that this space will always be the one to shield you & comfort you. Along with living and figuring yourself don't forget to build that very space for you.

Thanks & Regards,

Your cheerleader,

~k.

[waffles-and-momos]

Annyeong! ✨

The exact place where we met.

Yeah more than a year down, roller coster ? Nah a whole amusement park bruh.

Starting from where you reaching me out to me finding reasons to visit your room. Thanks tho :)

Cannot describe how many emotions have I felt and gone through in a single year with you and understanding the importance of feeling it respectting it no matter how bad it did for me for you or for others. No not saying you helped me being selfish but making realise I cannot be someone to just take up someone's bull shit just for the sake of it.

I know if it wasn't you I would've pissed down by people whom I titled to be freinds. Yeah wouldn;t really know or be gutsy enough to let them know what I am facing. Today no matter what or how things have been with them i'm so happy for speaking up for myself and letting them know "aise nai chalega".

I feel so much more evolved and confident around you so much that I can at least not shutup my thoughts thinking it's better to be meek.

Can't imagine myself a year and a half before and now. The first year kid would not be so determined to have suggested you that night, might have been so fuckin scared to do something for myself without asking anyone without thinking much just doing it because I wanted to.

I want to let you know that you have successfully been the only person till date who knows about me, EVERYTHING, Woah, and it's all because of you not just giving out an ear but making an effort to know me to tell me that it's safe to put it out here.

I have so much to talk to you about everything and anything but at times I also feel quiet to just have you by my side. TOUCH yk.

I feel so comforted to jsut be around you. I can easily put it to you my likes and dislikes without thinking twice, knowing even if you judge you'll let me know.

Sometimes I just miss having any random activity of ours that used to be normal back in those days. More than a roommate we've been like a team. And I cherish that.

I've grown with you and would want to continue doing that, learn new stuff, implement it, accept the change, be sad, happy, cry, alcoholic, build, clean, everything makes sense. Every little thing seems meaningful and worth remembering. Can you imagine I could literally take up about something about in the past that we both faced together but just randomly talk about it, something that felt good, bad, wierd, new ? Argh OMG you be my walky talky. To remind you walky talky are kept in near range only haaa.

Things would change a lot after you go, I guess, but I am sure we can manage if not we will still manage. Yeah I am scared of losing this bond with you and one should be, when it's this beautiful, but everything isn't about me and us. I know there are things that needs to be worked on, that needs to be noticed. I am sure how we've been together, we will keep coming back at times. I've been scared about losing people since forever but that has never stopped my growth as a person neither would I want you to. I've realised a while ago how Su and sour kept it to themselves/secret/or even actually being freinds and not in a relationship has helped them bonding stronger as well as prioritising their neeeds too. Giving utmost importance to each othr while working on themselves. I guess that's what su meant when people asked why not in a relationship. I know for a fact that the kind of people they both are no matter what they gonna stick even if others don't. That's when I felt it was good for us to not be that close. Now she can time up for someone she's actually close to and the same for me ?Therefore don't be pessimistic about the change rather embrace it as a big curve in your life that could change your ways of living, thinking and just being you. INDEPENCE. ✨ The one that we fought for all our life, the one for which we did stuff we didn't even want to, cried at times thinking when will we get out of it, cribbing at every failures that made us feel underconfident about ourselves, but still going on knowing it will definitely be over one day. And it has.

I will always keep looking for you because I want to.

Keep growing and shining my monsoon flower, you blossom with your own beauty.

Remember a flower blossoms for it's own joy.

AND some cringy lines -

Are you BTS 🤔, coz you, you are my universe and I I just want to put you first!

AHhhh ahhhhh my chest is paining 😖😣 can you hold me pls, I think I'll fall for you!

Where my soldiers at 🔫, need to open fire my love towards you 💕

hehe thank you for the show, bye. 🤌

[waffles-and-momos]

It's been on my mind lately.

We live in a world where rules are created by beings who don't even have the access to half of the land they're living on. We are surrounded by living things engulfed with the thought of always being content according to their means. We are put to test how much of these rules are being followed and valued. We are made to realise how these will help us into better beings like them. We are made to believe how these would make us happy in the long run. We are made to understand that these aren't made by or for beings who aren't not like them. We should know that beings not like them are a waste to this planet and should be eliminated as soon as possible.

While eventually leading us to put ourselves in a doubt, distrust, unlove, confusion, terrifying state of mind.

We cannot even take a step to live for the better thinking for a length of time how it'll affect them, us and all our surroundings and what not.

Privileged ? No. Some random people decide to give 2 very random people the responsibility of societal rules, get them married, have kid(s), make them feel guilty that they happened because of them making them a shittier beings for the rest of their lives. Voila!

Today i realised how much effort it takes to at least sit in a corner, doing nothing, staring at the clear sky, thinking of how different things could've been only if we were 'allowed', closing your eyes and peacefully listening to all the chaos in this world religiously created by these very beings, also very popularly known as Adults.

Could we have stoop down more ?

#living_well

[waffles-and-momos]

What the face does not express, your thoughts and actions do ~

A person (supposedly your best friend), comes to see you after the whole day passes, claiming they only got 5 mins to check-in with you. To ask if you're okay, or how you're doing, or whether you had dinner. And then to comment that, "Oh nothing much to gossip about," so they could conclude the discussion. They spend time with you by being engrossed in their own device, responding to several texts, by SEVERAL people. And you use humor sometimes, in front of them and others, to cope with the fact that they claim to apparently have good network in your room or wherever you are whenever you are together. But then they leave saying "acha thik hai, so jao tum." And it repeats for like, an eternity, with you realising that they actually do not have even a little concern about your day.

Not to mention the number of times they've shut you out in public to exercise power as their own birth right over you and make you feel you've embarrassed them enough.

Not to mention the number of times they would tell you how much they've talked about you in front of their mates but couldn't even make time to casually hangout with you.

Not to mention the number of times they'll criticize you from your decisions and choices to make you feel they care about you. Like duh.

Not to mention the number of times they'll tell you how important you are to them and the next moment they show you your real place in their lives.

Not to mention the number of times they refuse to admit their fault, even if they know they're wrong, they know they should be apologetic about something, but go on to put words into people's mouths, unlike themselves. Only to reassure themselves by insisting on "I CAN'T BE WRONG ANYWAY".

Two faced? Nah, just the right time, right place and right people was all they needed since forever, to be able to leave you behind. That too uninformed.

(oh! Did i mention they gave you 24×7 of customer service care during lockdown, i wonder why...)

#bffs

[waffles-and-momos]

As a child I used to believe that cloud aligns its shape according to our mood. And as a child, I only had 2 moods - happy/sad.As I grew up to these feelings and it became wider and variant, and I realised how pretty clouds can be when you just stare at its beauty thinking of the feels that fill you in the moment. It’s not about how clouds take the shape but how your brain makes you believe that this can comfort you. Although it’s a luxury now to do nothing but the gawk the clouds from sunrise to sunset because after all, materialistic gains have suppressed beings to the wants of being alive.